oomis

I once thought someone broke into the basement of the house where I was babysitting. I told the kids we were playing Hide and Seek, and hid them safely, with instructions not to talk or come out until I called them by name. Arming myself with a frying pan, I called my parents to let them know what was happening, as well as the people for whom I was sitting (no 911 in those days and I wasn’t absolutely sure I was correct).

It turned out to be an elderly carpenter who often came over on a motzai Shabbos to do repair work in the basement for them, and had been given a key to the house. My employers had forgotten to mention it to me, but they put me at ease about our safety but told him to go home and leave the key with me, as they “needed to give it to a relative for the week, who was staying by them.”

I told the kids they had been great Hide and Seekers, gave them a treat, and put them to bed. My father had stayed on the phone (they had two lines) with me all that time. He was two minutes away and would have come immediately, but I didn’t want him to. All in all, it was a “fun” night, once my heart rate settled down.

isn’t it time we faced the world as it is, became part of the world, and still held on to our traditions to the fullest extent?! “

Very intersting point. A very similar point was made in the comparison of Purim and Yom Kippurim, that Yom Kippur identifies itself by its very name as a “day LIKE Purim.” What does this mean?

It’s saying that in one respect, Purim might be viewed as an even holier day than the day that is LIKE it. Why? The reason is simple. It is very easy to be extremely spiritual and reflective and connected to Hashem, acting with proper Torah values and hashkafos when one is fasting and in Shul all day davening. The REAL test, however, is how one conducts himself when he is partying, drinking, celebrating,etc. as we do on Purim. If he can maintain that same spirituality, connection to Hashem, and act with proper Torah values under THAT circumstance, then he is truly living a Torah life.

Anyone can be a tzaddik when adding more and more gedarim. The question is, how do we behave when we do NOT have those gedarim around us?

We all need to be a little nicer, and at the same time, we all need to be a little thicker-skinned. Just because one or two people expressed themselves (rather unkindly, btw) in an unflattering fashion, does not mean that others are in agreement.

Whether you are a teen or a middle-ager like me (or much older), if you express yourself respectfully, you have a right to do so. Who cares if someone disagrees with you, or some smart aleck says what he or she thinks is hilarious, but is nonetheless negative in your eyes? Let it roll off your back, and don’t let it prevent you from exercising your ability to express your opinion.

that we shouldn’t marry the daughter of a working man, “

Well, who else is going to support them, then?

Everyone could have handled this better. Your sister was out of line, as you had asked her in advance to be more considerate. Your wife should not have yelled – that did not help the situation. Your parents were out of line for not speaking to you, and for not defending your position with your sister.

Lesson learned – no more vacations with your family in the same vehicle. For 28, your sister sounds like she needs to grow up. A LOT. That said, a baby should be trained to sleep through noise. Some cannot be, however, and your sister should have been mroe sensitive. In fact, because she thoughtlessly woke him, she should have had to be up with him for the next three hours.

hey oomis- I can introduce you to many young avreichim in my yeshiva, and many more in yeshivas and kollels round the globe, it’s done! Even in todays world!”

And there are many more young wives who feel incredibly stressed by having to do EVERYTHING, their job AND their husband’s job, by taking care of the house, family, and parnassah. I don’t believe too many of them realized what they were signing on for, and are nwo too embarrassed to admit that the Kolle life is not all they fantasized and romaticized it to be. This is not to say that it is not good for SOME avreichim. And all those for whom it DOES work, have SOMEONE (who did not go to Kollel, but earned a parnassah all his life) supporting him, otherwise he could not do it. So why is his learning more important than his Shver’s, who is at a time in his life when HE could and should be spending time learning all day, or at least much more than he was able to do all those years prior?

First thing I ever made for my then-boyfriend, was my mom’s one-of-a-kind cheese blintzes from scratch. I guess he wanted to see what else I could cook, as we became engaged shortly thereafter. Still cooking 36 years later…

The Little I know – knows a lot. Your post was well-expressed and made a great deal of sense.

And Rabbi Perfect, despite the wives of Bavel, we live in different times, and no one can live on ONE salary anymore, much less the salary earned solely by women in a man’s world. If men do not go out to earn a parnassah, they are contravening what Hashem made incumbent on them. Im ein kemach…

Is not all this topic L”H???

I willingly share my recipes also. It’s always a huge compliment to me when someone asks me how I made something they really enjoyed eating in my home.

I just made coconut rice for Shabbos last week, and it was a great hit. I found a recipe, but tweaked it a bit to reflect my own taste, and it was a huge hit!

I also heard that Leah and Rochel were identical twins (yet Yaakov still could tell the difference). Nonetheless, all this occurred before Mattan Torah. I wonder if one of the reasons Hashem gave us this Halacha as arayos, was not because of the trouble that can ensue from marriage to two sisters, especially with the progeny.

The children born of Bilhah and Zilpah were considered as Rochel and Leah’s. And being they were all the biological sons of Yaakov, they were considered full siblings.

Gam shehli.

oomis- as much as you love your mother, kibud av veeim can still be hard. I keep forgetting not to contradict my mother outright when she accidentally mixes something up. I would never manage without my mother, and I love her very much. Despite that, it can still get hard to remember to speak with the proper respect she deserves. “

I understand what you are saying. If it were easy however, the reward for it would not be as great. My mom O”H is gone nearly 20 years, and I STILL have much pain and charata over one specific incident between us (and though my argument WAS correct, I know I was absolutely incorrect in how I reacted with her). To this day, when I go to her kever, I ask for mechilah at being so foolishly chutzpahdig. Right or wrong, easy or challenging, we still have the chiyuv of kibud av and eim. When we know there are buttons being pushed by a parent, we need to respectfully step away if we cannot act respectfully. Some parents are harder to deal with than others, but that does not free us from certain obligation. I had to work on this middah in myself (sometimes harder to do than others), and that was despite the fact that my mother was a WONDERFUL, loving person. We just occasionally disagreed. That’s btw, why my motto is “disagree without being disagreeable.”

it’s “only for Pesach” and then integrate them into your chametz stock, and really how many jars of cinnamon and garlic powder does a person need”

True, and I actually do that. But certain spices really lose their potency and flavor relatively quickly, and are just not worth saving from year to year. i do save most, though.

My greatest expense was ALWAYS the yeshivah tution. Bar none.

I always look forward to your interesting recipes.

“Frumnotyeshivish – I don’t think smokers don’t believe that it’s dangerous”

You are IMO fooling yourself if you really believe that. Maybe SOME smokers actually are fully cognizant of what they’re doing, and are willing to take their chances, but the vast majority of smokers whom I have seen interviewed about their “rights,” pooh pooh the whole notion (and that is part of the addiction). They will rationalize it every which way they can, to prove to themselves (certainly not to the rest of us), that there is no harm either to themselves or to the rest of the world around them.

YES, they ARE polluting the air that we non-smokers have to breathe. There are many, many types of air pollution. Smoking should not have to be one of them. Let them smoke in a bubble, if they wish, and breathe their own stale, stinking, recycled air as much as they wish. I won’t say a word. (though I hope they wise up sooner than later. Emphysema or lung cancer are not pretty ways to die).

The miraculous existence of the Jews certainly proves that Hashem has Chosen us.

I don’t want this poster to be embarrassed, either that we are expressing our dismay. Fortunately we are on an anonymous forum. Playtime, I think you were absolutely wrong in what you did, though I do understand the kana-us that might have motivated you. I just believe you picked the wrong time, circumstance, and place to try to make what you felt was an important point, to someone who was nowhere in the ballpark ready to hear about it.

I don’t really think you can prove the existence of G-d. If you believe, you need no proof. If you don’t believe, you will always find a way to disprove the “proof” that is offered by others. L’havdil, it’s kind of like trying to prove to cigarette smokers that they are polluting the environment are opening themselves up to potentially fatal illnesses. Those of us who believe that, don’t smoke. Those who don’t believe, refuse to believe, even in the face of the irrefutable evidence in that regard. People believe what they want to believe, whether it’s Hashem or something else. Until something happens, that it, that changes their lives. There are no atheists in foxholes.

Shabbos afternoon, he told me that if this is what Judaism teaches, he is very disappointed.’

You were so out of line, the line is not even visible. First you get a teenager to WANT to be frum. When he is solid in his frumkeit, he might be more receptive to being taught what you meant well in teaching him. You were wrong, IMO. And I pray you didn’t so negatively affect this boy that he has no further interest in being frum.

This is a problem that I see in many such programs. KNOW your target audience and worry about the BIG details. The smaller ones will fall into place at the right time, but you have to get them engaged and interested first, before hitting them with the things that are important to you, but might not yet have any impact on them.

Why cannot this be true, yekke 2? We have limited understanding of what Yesh m’ayin means. Maybe the ten Maamaros with which Hashem Created the world were what we ignoramuses can only understand as “The Big Bang Theory. At the end of the day, Hashem Created the universe, and it doesn’t matter HOW!!!

Alcohol is a stimulant in small amounts. Not so good for sleeping. Stay away from ALL forms of caffeine after 1 or 2 PM, including coffee(even decaf),cola, tea (unless caffeine-free herbal tea), chocolate (a biggie), and items that might have these ingredients even in small amounts. Some people are mnore sensitive than others. Eat a fleishig meal containing a tryptophan-laden ingredient (like turkey), or a milchig meal, but not too spicy.

Don’t watch TV or go on your computer within a couple of hours of bedtime. Read something. Even though you may not realize it, the mind being stimulated by TV or computer can find it hard to wind down. Listen to quiet, gentle music if you can.

I personally find the use of a fan, blocks out extraneous noises, and is cheaper than a sound machine. But, be careful, it is habit-forming and you can become dependent on it in order to fall asleep.

If you are milchig and all else fails, warm milk works wonders.

Thanks Popa, you just redeemed yourself for the machooh. 🙂

Rebdoniel also makes a good point.

Getting hungry here…