Rabbi Chaim Pashwazman, father of the late R’ Pinchas Menachem Pashwazman hy”d, who was killed by Hamas rocket fire four months ago, spoke about his intertwined feelings of joy and pain on Thursday as he prepared for the bris of his grandson, who arrived in the world on Monday night already orphaned of his father, R’ Pinchas Menachem. The new baby is the second son born to the Pashwazmans – the first son, Yehudah, is now a year and a half.

R’ Chaim agreed to be interviewed by Kan News, although as the host said: “This isn’t something that you’re used to doing, speaking on television.” R’ Chaim responded that he agreed to the interview because he realized how much the Jewish people wanted to share in his burden. “I feel the wishes of the Jewish people to be with me during the difficult times as well as the happy times, on the heels of the pain.”

“It’s what called “simcha m’hulah b’etzev,” the interviewer said – joy diluted by pain. “Is that how you really feel?”

“It’s truly happiness as well as pain, crying and rejoicing, like dancing and crying at the same time,” R’ Chaim responded. “You have a son, invest in him, educate him. He began his life, married, had a son – little Yehuda. He had everything he needed and was forging his path in life and then his life was cut off in such a tragic way – so harshly and painfully.”

“He had just finished davening Mincha and was running to a building to take shelter and was hit by shrapnel. Nobody else on the street was hit except for him – he was hit by three pieces of shrapnel from the rocket. People who were standing a meter away from him, a half a meter, weren’t hit. It was obvious the shrapnel was intended specifically for him. Every piece of shrapnel, every fragment, has an address.”

“It was difficult for us prior to the birth and after the birth, knowing that the baby is entering the world without a father, a world where he won’t know what a father is,” R’ Chaim said sadly. “But at the same time, we also have a feeling of renewal, of rebuilding. Boruch Hashem, there’s a continuation of the family following the loss and grief. Yehudah, who’s a year and a half, and the new baby will remain in the world and follow the path he chose. Although they won’t know their father, they’ll know the type of life he wanted for them.” R’ Chaim added that his daughter-in-law is a true heroine and has shown incredible strength in the face of her loss.

“All of [my son’s] life was dedicated to his values, to learning Torah. He learned dayanus, he did chesed, he did a lot for his community and friends. Boruch Hashem, there’s what to strive for and there will definitely be a perpetuation of his life. When [his sons] grow up, I’ll tell them about their father’s positive qualities, his successful life, his liveliness, his striving for perfection, his desire to give to others and grow in Torah and Yiras Shamayim.”

R’ Chaim concluded the interview with a bracha for all of Am Yisrael to have healthy and successful children. “Am Yisrael knows how to rise up from the pain – from bereavement – and continue life. This is what we’ve done throughout the generations.”