An engineer who fell asleep at the controls of a Metro North Rail Road train and caused a derailment that killed four people and injured more than five dozen others two years ago apologized for the crash in his first public interview Wednesday and says he relives it every day.

In an interview with WABC-TV, William Rockefeller said he can’t stop seeing the faces of the victims.

“I just wish it never happened,” he told the television station. “I’m sorry for it happening … I’m just haunted by those faces.”

Rockefeller was at the helm of the commuter train headed to Grand Central Terminal on Dec. 1, 2013, when it derailed while going around a curve in the Bronx at about 82 mph. The speed limit on the turn was 30 mph. Federal investigators later determined that Rockefeller had nodded off at the controls and was suffering from an undiagnosed sleeping disorder.

Four people were killed and more than 70 others were injured in the derailment. Prosecutors later decided not to bring criminal charges against Rockefeller, who remains out of work, saying the incident was non-criminal.

“The day just keeps playing over and over,” Rockefeller said. “Every day it feels like it just happened yesterday. No matter what I do I just can’t shake that feeling.”

(AP)