by Rabbi Yair Hoffman for the Five Towns Jewish Times

Just before candle lighting time this evening, many people will be lighting a two day yiskor candle for someone they have lost. Some of us will be lighting two.

It is the custom within Klal Yisroel to light a Yartzeit candle before the day of Yom Tov that has Yizkor. It should be lit before Yom Tov and should not be lit on Yom Tv itself. The lighting has no accompanying blessing, and people would like to express themselves in a Tefillah when lighting the candle.

The author of the Peleh Yoetz, Rabbi Eliezer Papo (1785–1828), did in fact compose such a prayer. Rav Papo was the Rabbi of the city of Selestria in Bulgaria. Bulgaria was a part of the Ottoman Empire at the time. The Tefillah of the Peleh Yoetz is reproduced and translated below, as a public service.

הריני מדליק נר זה למנוחת ולעילוי נשמת אבי מורי ____ בן _________ תפילה הנמצאת בספר אלף המגן מבעל הפלא יועץ על פרשת ויצא עמוד כ”ד
יהי רצון מלפניך ה’ אלקינו ואלהי אבותינו, שתקבל ברחמים וברצון כל מעשה הטוב שאני עושה, בין במחשבה, בין בדיבור, בין במעשה ויהיה הכל לזכות ולמנוחת ולעילוי לנשמות עמך ישראל, ובפרט לנפש רוח ונשמה של אמי _____. יהי רצון שתהינה נפשותיהם צרורות בצרור החיים.

Behold, I am lighting this lamp for the resting and uplifting of the soul of my father, my teacher _______ the son of _______. May it be Your will before You Hashem Elokainu and G-d of our forefathers, that all the good deeds that I do will accepted with mercy, whether in thought, in speech or in deed. It shall all be for the merit and rest and for the elevation of the souls of Your nation, Israel. It should especially be a merit for the spirit and soul of my parent _____. May it be Your will that their souls be bound in the pebbles of life.

Add the word Imi morasi if it is for a mother.

We further observe their yahrzeits by saying kaddish, learning in their memory, and fasting. Many people also try to perform acts of Chessed on this day as well – all for the merit of the deceased.

But what are the reasons to light this candle? Is it a Torah Mitzvah or a derabanan? Below we fid a number of reasons behind this minhag.
Please note that much of the information below is found in Rav Aharon Levine’s wonderful sefer called “Kol Bo L’Yartzeit (Vol. I Chap. 1).”

• It is a fulfillment of the Mitzvah of V’ahavta l’rayacha kamocha. Rav Yitzchok Isaac Sherr zatzal Leket Sichos Mussar (p 329) cites three sources for the application of this Mitzvah to parents. The Zohar (Raya Mehemnusa Dvarim page 281a) writes that we are obligated to love our parents as we do ourselves, for their love is equated to the love of Hashem. The Sefer Chareidim 9:37 writes that loving them is part of the Mitzvah of honoring them. The Chayei Odom 67:1 also writes that we are obligated in loving them. The matter is of some debate, however, as the Maharal in his Chidusshei Agados 31a seems to be of the opinion that there is no greater obligation to love parents more so than other Jews.

• It is a fulfillment of Kivud Av v’aim. The Gemorah Kiddushin 31b explains that the Rabbis taught- You honor him in his lifetime and you honor him after death. Both Dayan Weiss (Minchas Yitzchok Vol. III #136:9) and the Tzitz Eliezer (Vol XII 59:3) are of the opinion that Kivud Av v’Aim after death is also biblical.

• It is an expression of Hakaras HaTov – recognizing the good that one had received from another. This is particularly true that we should recognize all that parents have done for us on a day that we have the ability to give merit to their neshama and assist in their receiving greater reward.

• It brings a Kapparah, an atonement for the Neshamos. Thus when the children do maasim tovim, learn Torah, say kaddish and do other Mitzvos, this atones for anything the Neshamah might have done.

• It brings an elevation for the Neshama. Even if the Neshama was free of sin, there are different aspects of performances of Mitzvos that are taken into account when the Neshama reaches the upper realms.

• It is a fulfillment of Hashavas Aveidah. The Gemorah in Sanhedrin explains that saving one’s life is a fulfillment of returning a lost object. Certainly this would be so in regard to restoring the soul to a loftier level.

• It avoids violating Lo Saamod al Dam Rayacha. The Torah tells us not to stand idly by one’s brother’s blood. If we just ignore an opportunity to place a parent on a higher spiritual level – this is tantamount to standing idly by another’s blood.

• It is the fulfillment of the obligation to perform Chessed. The greatest Chessed is the one that is done to someone that cannot return the favor. Those that are the shochnei afar – cannot repay anyone. Observing a Yahrtzeit is thus one of the greatest Chassadim.

• Only when we truly know the pain of losing something do we truly appreciate the value of what we have. We can appreciate the gifts that Hashem has given us when we commemorate and understand the loss.

• It strengthens our belief in Tchiyas HaMeisim. One of the pillars of Torah true Judaism is the eventual restoring of the dead. If we ponder the gift of the yearly seasons, we see how things that wither away eventually come back. This helps us in our belief in Techias HaMeisim. The same is true with a Yahrtzeit – it helps entrench within us the fundamentals of our emunah.

The author can be reached at [email protected]

This article was printed l’ilui nishmas Reb Nosson Yosef ben Moshe z”l, Sara bas Eliyahu a”h, Yaakov Ben Yisroel Meir z”l and in honor of the birth of the author’s new grandson, Yaakov ben Rephoel HaLevi.