Dear YWN,
I am not the “letter-writing” type of person, but after what I witnessed last evening felt that this must be brought out in public.
On Sunday evening I was a guest at the chasuna of a frum young couple B”H. The wedding was held in a Brooklyn wedding hall. The Simcha was beautiful, dancing was lebidig, and the simcha was felt in the air.
The first dance was over, and I found a seat at the “Bochrims Table”.
What I then saw, shocked me to the core, and prompted me to pen this letter to YWN.
I noticed that some of the boys were acting a little rowdy and inappropriate, but I simply brushed it off as they were teenagers (with & without hats).
Then it hit me. The amount of alcohol that was on the table was mostly brought in by the boys themselves. I watched as they pulled bags from underneath the table and opened bottle after bottle of hard booze.
Don’t get me wrong I’m all for a L’chaim at a simcha, but bringing your own hard liquor and making “homemade hard lemonade”!?!?
It didn’t stop there….. One of the boys walked in with a small box, the box contained a significant amount of marijuana and a scale!
Now I don’t know if he was planning on selling it to the other boys on my table or various other “yeshivalight”.
BUT WHEN DID IT BECOME ACCEPTABLE THAT A TEENAGER SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO THAT AMOUNT OF DRUGS !?!? AND TO WALTZ INTO A SIMCHA NO LESS !?
I promptly got up and left the wedding as I knew if I confronted this boy it would not end well for either of us, but I ask of you…………
WHAT IS THE ANSWER !?
Call the police ?
Tell a rebbi ?
A parent ?
A menahel ?
Name withheld upon request.
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67 Responses
Dear author:
If you know who they are, tell. Tell the Menahel. I wouldn’t necessarily tell the parents as they probably wouldn’t believe you & you’d be “the bad guy.” But this shouldn’t be ignored.
Why am I shocked? At my age, nothing in the frum veldt should surprise me anymore. Maybe it’s the openness of what they do?
“WHEN DID IT BECOME ACCEPTABLE THAT A TEENAGER SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO THAT AMOUNT OF DRUGS !?!?”
WHEN DI IT BECOME ACCEPTABLE THAT A TEENAGER SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO ANY AMOUNT OF DRUGS!?!?
Come on! Stop pulling my leg! How frum were these people REALLY?!?
Kol Hakavod for writing this letter. However, comfronting the boy would have been a wise more, perhaps not in front of everyone but to take him aside. Certainly if the parents were at the wedding to take them aside as well. I think that we have become a generation that hides situations for different reasons. At first thought telling parents may hurt them but at the end of the day the hurt will be much greater. I too am a parent and would want to know, for is that not the reason Hashem put parents in the world. Not to win the most popular award but the most caring.
i guess by nobody doing anything you made it accepted and acceptable. i guess u should have walked over like a younger sister or brother with fear and concern and inquired…. ?
tell the rav,
YES IT S A TERRIBLE TRAGEDY!!!
IT’S ALSO A COMMUNITY PROBLEM; IT’S NOT A PRIVATE ISSUE AS MANY PEOPLE THINK! [ONE DAY IT CAN BE YOUR CHILD CH”V]
AFTER SPEAKING TO A NUMBER OF YESHIVAS, I FIGURED
OUT THEY ARE POWERLESS, AS SOON AS THEY MAKE TAKONOS, THE BOYS JUST RUN OFF TO THE NEXT YESHIVA WHO’S LENIENT
WE WILL ONLY GET SOME PLACE, IF ALL THE YESHIVA’S GET TO TOGETHER AND MAKE TAKONOS, AND THE PARENTS, ALL OF US, SUPPORT IT.
People its time to realize this is more common than you think! Why the guy didn’t hide it, I don’t know!
#1 I was a guest and didn’t know these boys but they were from a “mainstream yeshiva”
In response to # 2 probably just as Choshuv as you.
and to # 3 have you ever tried to confront a dealer ? I have ! let’s just say it’s not a good idea.
DEAR NWUR (name witheld….)
ANY TIME YOU SEE A CHILD IN A BAD SITUATION YOU MUST LOOK AT THEM AS IF IT IS “YOUR CHILD”.THIS WILL CLEAR UP ANY QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD HAVE
To the author…
The answer to YOUR question, is the answer to THIS question…
If it was another adult in the spot YOU were in, and the boy was YOUR son, what would you have wanted him to do?
B.T.W. – As a father of 4 sons myself, I would definitely have wanted you to tell me!
First of all you are completely right about almost everything. But you should have gone over to the boys and befriended them, you never know maybe you could have changed someones life!!! But the comment about “(with & without hats)” Why on earth does that matter???? Could be people like you who stereotype before even knowing what these boys have gone threw are what drive them to drink in the first place???
To number #10 I did shmooze with them to the best of my abilities. However as the saying goes “ya can’t win em all”
And the (with & without hats) was to clarify things for people like comment#2
I wonder how mainstream the Yeshivah was. I highly doubt these boys were from what’s commonly considered a mainstream yeshivah. If yes I am truly in shock at the openness.
Today there are a lot of yeshivos catering to boys who have problems. They know their students drink and do drugs but over time they wean them off of it. Don’t be so sure the boys were from the mainstream yeshivah. They could have been sitting with boys they know from other yeshivos. Also bear in mind Marijuana is relatively benign. They want to legalize it for medication. I’m not condoning drug use Chas V shalom but if it was cocaine it would be a different matter. Btw if you ever see boys with cocaine I hope you will promptly confiscate it or call the police.
To The Author
The problem is a huge problem and everyone is in denial. The only thing every one is busy with is the water isnt kosher, strawberries and lettuce! The rabbis gotta wake up and smell the cofee! having two or three rabbis and a few local askanim handling these precious neshomus is not enough. The kids are so so so thirsty to get attention and noone gives it to them. And i think u made a wise decision not to approach him and yell at him i was with a freind of mine in lakewood at a vort not to long ago amd he approached a dealer that was dealing at the vort and i beleive he was threatened “dont mess with him he is in charge of lakewood and he will come back with a gun”!!!! yes it was a yiddashe nashuma!!!
To #11 well the people like #2 need to get a reality check!! this stuff exists in the jewish world even the “chasuva world”
This punk should have been arrested on the spot. What kind of question is this?!
Want to show “love” to them? No problem. The users, not the PUSHERS.
Have him arrested AT ONCE!
# 12 I shmoozed themup that’s how I know they are mainstream.
To # 13 I agree sith you the problem is large and the people involved are small.
As for the attention part that is why i shmoozed em up.
the letter writer is an accessory to the crime for not calling the cops and dragging this kid in cuffs out of the hall in custody.
a drug dealer should not be classified as a kid at risk anymore.
To # 13 why dont you get involved?
I would tell you this: If it is at the point that there is no more shame or reluctance to bring it out in the open or have the least bit of decency, deference or derech eretz for the chassan, kallah and baaleh simcha, you should have phoned the police and asked for a detective to come in quietly because you are not experienced and are not sure. Ask the detectives to come in dressed in regular suits and not police blue and just meet you in the lobby or mens room and then have them mingle close to the bochurim or instigator.
Understand this and understand it well all of you PLEASE. Those who bring in these kind of paraphernalia are the ones that get YOUR kids hooked on drugs. Yes typical yeshiva bochurim, black hats, oreos as the kids call them, with their tzizis hanging out are also drug dealers and sell drugs to make money and feed their own habits.
Are you shocked? Don’t be. The only way to stop it, is to do the right thing and turn them in. The only way to get them help is to get them to stop and face the reality they are currently in. They are no longer just drug addicts they are drug dealers and you can’t just put a bandaid on it and move them from one yeshiva to another. They are troubled and they need REAL help! They are not only hurting themselves they are hurting others. They need to be forced into therapy and they need to to know there are consequences for their actions. They need to be scared straight.
To # 18 if you would be out on the street on ave M late night shift me and you would be friends!!!!
Number 19 I must agree with you for the most part… but here is where the problem comes in. Have you ever tried to call the police ? Does the expression don’t tell us how to do our job ring a bell ?? They will send a marked car wheter you like it or not “they have their protocols”. And i most definately did not want that to happen.
to number 18 from #13’s post it would seem he is already involved.
To # 19 this is a big problem and us poshiter yidden cantmake the decision to just call 911 abd have the kid hauled out of the wedding! imagine if chas vishulm it would be your son and the author would have had your son hauled out then u would be screaming that he is a moiser amongst other horrible things!!!!! the answer is the rabbis MUSTget involved
Is this letter for real? If it is not, it is loshon horah and a tremendous Chillul Hashem. Please delete this entire thread. If you were personally there and know this as FACT you should consult with a gadol what to do and I assure you he won’t tell you to print the letter in YWN!
i find it hard to believe that a young boy would pull out marijuana in front of many people, please explain?
I believe that some bochurim drink and use drugs but I do not believe this story. If it is true these guys are idiots beyond belief.
to YWN: I’m sure if these were chasidisha boys, that would have been clearly noted numerous times!
after reading all the responses until now it seems like the most important thing is missing here.
what would you do if you saw your kids playing with matches , i’m sure that you would stop them from hurting themselves no matter what you have to do .
the same rules should apply here , however if i saw someone pulling out there own booze , i would go to the kitchen and call the mashgeach and go to the caterer. they will do what they have to do because they are legally responsibille for what goes on in there hall . now if they are to scaired to do something about this problem then call the cops and tell them whats going on and get out as fast as possible.
To post # 20 Kudos to you !! unfortunately the problem exists outside of NY too.
To post # 23 IT’S AS REAL AS IT SOUNDS- AND if it helps even Neshomo it’s worth it !
# 24 READ THE STORY
# 25 They are not idiots, they are yiddeshe kinder, that for some reason or other never got the correct attention / chinuch they deserved.
Perhaps instead of looking down @ them as idiots look @ them as Yiddeshe kinder and you will find a way to get involved too.
AND TO ALL YOU HOLLERING TO CALL THE COPS, then what ?? Call all the local Askonim and star campaigns to get the kids out !?
( btw dealers aren’t afraid if prison or they wouldn’t get into this to begin with)
Rabosai obviously there is no simple solution here, but I beg of you the “jig is up” time to confront this problem head on !
And to those of you that think this could not have been MY SON’s YESHIVA……. It may not have been this time but don’t fool yourselves for a second.
anyone who witnesses such an event & doesnt call the cops asap, is a bigger criminal then these kids!
Sabra before you jump to call the cops, stop for a second and honestly think. If this were my son/daughters/close friends/cousins Chasuna would I really want 4+ UNIFORMED POLICEMEN to walk in ??
Chances are the few incorrect individuals will not go quietly = a huge scene = ego trips = additional backup by police = a larger crowd of onlookers = more police = equal more ego by both parties = more arrests for obstruction of justice = more people going to central booking for the night = families having to bail out fathers / mothers / children.
AND TO TOP IT OFF A CHOSON AND KALLAH HAVING THEIR PERECT ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE RUINED.
And being mevaish alot of people B’rabim.
To #22:
It is because of people like YOU that bad things happen. ‘Who am I to take action?’ So everyone justs stands there. YOUR son was probably sitting there as part of the ‘chevra’, thus enabling the others to do as they pleased.
To Hpo i feel you did the right thing by keeping your mouth shut and doing nothing because you obviously have no experiance in dealing with teenagers so best would be shev ve’al taseh. To all the people who are saying point blank he should have called the cops do you realize how much achrayus hpo would be taling on himself if he would do that. My advice would be to consult with daas torah, something which is obviously a foreign concept to anyone who shoots from the lip and decides “call the cops”. I just want to add one more thing i normally dont post comments on goosip sites such as this however after seeing some of the blatantly ridiculous comments posted here i felt compelled to post something.
#29 calling the cops wont make a diffrence just a worse seen, its not going to solve the problem its happening all over,
if children are not happy then they have to find something that will make them happy.
the system we have today has created this whole problem, its not just the Yeshiva Boys if thats what all you think its a lot worse,look at all those children that are out on the street just because of the system, they are not happy.
what are we going to to about all those hundreds of children that are out there,Call the cops???
THAT WONT SOLVE THE PROBLEM WE HAVE IN TODAYS GENERATION!!
we have to change the system we have!!! this will make all the children much happier with themselves and non of this would be happening!!!
HELLO WAKE UP wasn’t the Sunday session at the Agudah convention discussing drugs in our community?
#23 Shindy wake up of course this is real
# 12 you are not well informed, is the MIR Yerushaliem mainstream enough for you????
It used to be the difference between a ‘drug’ Yeshiva and a non-drug Yeshiva was are there drugs there or not, today the difference is do they deal with it or pretend its not happening and sweep it under the carpet.
How many of our high schools have project SAFE to discuss the dangers of drugs, and other harmful activities (that nebach also go on)? None! (except Yeshiva of Flatbush, but they are chutz lamachaneh,)
I asked a serious Bais Medrash Talmud of mine in Yerushaliem that went to Chofetz Chiam in NY, am I so out of touch? He said Rebbi you have to understand marijuana is no big deal to most guys nowadays, its like drinking or smoking.
There is a seminary girl in the hospital now in in a coma because the ‘hash,’ she bought was laced with something, and the unsuspecting ‘friends’ she bought it from (that are in custody) could Chalila face manslaughter, if Chas v’e sholom…..
And lets not be so naive, there are of “daf yomi bale Batim” in their 30’s that are smoking up with their wives. Drugs are in our community!
We are The best there is, we are the am hanivchar, and we are the Chrud l’dvar hashem, but that cannot allow us to close our eyes to serious issues like Drugs, child abuse, Arayos etc. in our community.
This is a serious issue that needs to be dealt with because it is out of control. We ignored it for to long and we cannot afford to anymore.
if you are sitting there finding some reason to excuse this and put yourself and your family in another category so this doesn’t hit home.. Don’t!
Rather deal with it.
If you are not the askan type or the get involved type at least please please please
SPEAK TO YOUR KIDS!!!!
If you don’t know how to, Learn.
A Maggid Shiur that took off his blinds
to the author:
My first question to you would be why would you sit at the bochurims table? were you even invited??
If you are all for a lchaim at a simcha maybe the chosson wouldn’t be so cheap and therefore the guys wouldn’t have to bring their own ‘booze’ from home. And lets call a spade a spade, the dancing wouldnt be as leibedig as you say it was had there not be any drinking going on. Oh and a huge mazel tov to my friend who made a shidduch last night!!!! One less couple closer to solving the crisis!!!!!!!!
Lets move on to another issue: you say you brushed it off and that they were just teenagers with and without hats. May I ask why you feel the need to stress the point that some of the boys are not wearing hats? maybe it is due to your lack of sensitivity towards boys who are not as strong as others and to label them that because they are not wearing hats they are “bums” that so many of them decide to use drugs.
If the boys were at the wedding were so highly intoxicated and drugged up, doesn’t that speak for the chosson himself? what kind of yeshiva did this guy go to? what kind of friends does he have?
So I end with with one simple question to the author: do you really know the root of the problem? please dig deeper next time you would like to make public a letter that only says negative about our amazing boys in yeshiva.
Me Kiamcha Yisroel Goi Echad Baaretz
34, I believe you are correct to a large extent: parents and students must be truly aware of the dangerous presented by drugs and alcohol. But I have to ask why was that student you spoke of incorrect in saying that marijuana is essentially on par with alcohol or tobacco? Would we be as furiously demanding action and change if a Torah yid occasionally had a scotch at night to relax? Mah ha’nafka meena?
good morning america…there has been a dramatic rise in the use of weed by frum kids in the past 10 years and any parent who thinks there kids is out of the picture is out of there mind. literally any yeshiva you name to me i know boys there who have or still do get high… part of the times
due to the fact that untill 2 weeks ago i was also on drugs i want to point out something important probably the only reason why he pulled out by the table is in spite of all the ppl like you if no one would look at them differently they would not have the urge to pull it out in frony of you on the contrary they would probably respect you a drop more and not do it in front of you the are doing it in front of you cuz they know you are watching now im not saying it should be ignored completely but you should really ask a good therapist in how to deal with it oh and no one really likes it when you start butting in to their buisness it just ticks them off more trust me. i would write the reason why they are smoking it to begin with but there is not enough room on the page my point is whatch what you say
oh and one more thing dont go calling the cops on a teenager using cocaine mary-j ecstacy heroine pills etc. all you are going to end up with is a teen in prison and then a few years later all you ppl will once again start writing that they should release him hes not so bad pidyon shvuim. just skip the whole thing to begin with
and to all you ppl that think it doesnt happen in mainstreem yeshivos not true i was in mainstreem yeshivos and was smoking weed (i am not the only one trust me)
to the Magid Shiur #34;
I’m a board member of MASK and love your comment we need you to work with us if you are for real please call the MASK office at 718-758-0400 ask for Ruchama and identify yourself as the magid Shiur that commented on the Yeshiva World piece.
Help us save neshomos…
Eshrecha!! Mi K’amcha Yisroel!
What a great people we are, we see teenagers doing the wrong thing, children we dont know, yet we are thinking as if they are our own.
To all those with the great ideas, its great your sitting behind a computer instead of being on the front line against drugs and alcohol.
I know the author, and was at the beautiful chasuna with him. I dont believe he was asking for your recommendations on how to deal with this problem, since HE is on the front lines, on the dark streets during the cold winter helping these lost souls (that might look like they are the top of their shiur). The author was bringing it the the attention of those reading YWN.
Rabbosai!! These bochrim are OUR children, OUR neighbors, OUR friends, OUR family. Drugs and alcohol abuse effects those wearing jeans and t-shirts, black pants and white shirts, bekeshes and shteimels… EVERY TYPE from EVERY BACKGROUND and EVERY NEIGHBORHOOD. PLEASE, don’t keep your heads in the sand.
Maybe in that situation the fact that you didnt call the Police was the right decision (altho I doubt you really thought it out as clearly as your #30 post)
I do think however that sometimes “tough love” is in order. You wanna play the games? You are gonna do the time. If we keep proteceting the junkies in our community the disease just multiplies because the other kids who are “at risk” see that they can get away with it as well. Why wouldnt you have fun if you could? So next time you see some Jewish punk smoking dope on the street corner do 5 other kids a favor and call the Police.
Sacrilege has a point. Don’t make a scene; just call 911 on your cellphone DISCREETLY so no one knows.
If anyone of those bochurim were under 21, then underaged drinking had occurred.
This doesn’t sound like a Jewish wedding; it sounds like something out of the Mafia.
Are all of you living in a shell?
I mean I thought that the readers of this site are somewhat educated an no a little bit of what goes on in the world.
I laughed when I read the article. Marijuana/weed/ganja is your problem? That is what you want to call the cops for?
Hard lemonade?? Oy yoy yoy! Such a big problem.
Oh, uneducated readers, these things are common place in our lives.
I will not be shocked if you pointed to any person under the age of 25 (and I should probably say older but I am not positive) and told me that they smked up last night.
Yes, even boys in Lakewood or chasiishe boys.
Yes, your son/son-in-law may have smoked weed to get a little high.
These things are commonplace.
Booze???? Who doesnt drink.
And the only reason they brought their own is because the chosson, yes the chosson, probably WARNED them that the bar will not be open or will not be fully stocked.
Now, I agree that weed has no place at a wedding. It shouldn’t be used in such a maztav but it is used all the time in our neighborhoods. Blame it on TV, movies, peer pressure or whatever you want but it happens.
Its like saying “Oh, no! I saw the boys smoking”. Just be happy that it want crack, or E. (Ecstacy for short)
And the booze is usually controlled by the guys because after all if you are married you wont drink and if youre single you are on the look out for the shadchan.
Again, weed has no place at a wedding but many boys have tried it.
Booze has some room but don’t overreact. They had some fun.
JUST BE REAL PEOPLE, PLEASE
As a medical professional who happens to be working with drug addicts right now (B”H not frum ones), I probably would have ignored them unless I knew them personally. I wouldn’t want to ruin this chasunah. COPS never do anything discreetly. On the other hand, if they were dealing to young kids or others who weren’t their peers, I’d call the cops immediately (Sakanas Nefoshos). If you see illegal activity on the streets -by all means call the cops. (Ask a shaila first if you know they are frum in every other aspect, unless someone’s life is in danger.) One thing I will tell you is that it appears to me that there is a big problem with narcotics addiction -mainly the pills. ( I don’t know if this is a problem in the frum community, but I wouldn’t be surprised.) This type of addiction is very easy to hide. The best defense is awareness, but I think the world and especially the frum community aren’t up to par.
as soon as you mentioned pot i knew you were full of it i cant believe anyone is taking this guy seriously i think purim got to him a little early, for that i say le chaim
its disgusting and almost funny how stuped and sheltered some of the people leaving comments are.first of the all the reason they are who they is mostly becuase you (people in general) are the way you are.are these kids murderes or armed robers gd forbid? unless they are there is never an excuse to get the law involved.EVER.its not your buisnes unless thet directly hurt or strongly effect you! and come on,’how do they get ahold of these drugs?’ its 2010 my friends!as easy as it is to purchase a cup of coffe is as easy as it is to get ahold of a POUND of marjuana.and something isn’t true or mabye just exagerated.no one in the right mind carries a SCALE for their marjuna unless your a established druglord of some sort! infact I was by the weding and I know there was No scale.there was no unusual or overly inapropiate behavior either.teens will be teens and that will never change.and someone asks ‘how frum were these people really?’ is this a serious forum or a corny joke page.whats does a level of religion have to do with drug ussage.if only people would open those sheltered eyes and see the main drug problem is among the frumest of frum people.there was high supervision on every drop of alchohol consumption and it was all suplied by the hall (mabye not for underage ussage) but the fact is no one brought any from outside.remember I was infact there and very closly watched what was going on.PEOPLE OPEN YOUR EYES AND RESPECT THE STRUGLE.DONT DEGRADE AND DONT THREATEN.there are far more productive and effective ways to stop this strugle without the law.
Ok, please, somebody has GOT to learn not to exaggerate! I was at that wedding, I know each and every one of those guys personally (except for one, more on that soon).
To clear things up, there was only ONE bottle of alcohol,and even that was 75% pink lemonade. So relax with all the teenage drunkenness accusations please.
Next, no one at that table smoked any weed, in fact, no one, besides that one guy that showed it off, incidentally(or not) the one I didn’t know closely, smokes weed at all!
I would hope people would know to take letters written anonymously on the internet with a BIG grain of salt. If not, then I have only one thing to say to you. GET WITH THE TIMES.
Ending up, Original Poster, I cannot resist from writing this, even though it’s more than slightly juvenile, in my eyes it’s quite warranted…. YOU’RE A FOOL. Good night everyone.
you guys are so over reacting with this.
its what some people do
who are u to judge them
get a life its none of your buisness!
i am a wittness that this man isnt lying cause i myself are one of the “bochurim” who were sitting on the table and saw all of this happening even though i dont smoke marijuana i am a teenager and can say that alot of kids do it and at the same time are shomer shbs and mitzvos which in my personal opinion matters most
#47 – Eric55 – you are a sad example of people keeping their head in the sand
Yaasher Koach to #34
To # 35 I will not waste my time and tear your childish comment apart. Rather I will tell you your username shows that you haven’t used yours.
To # 42 Thanks. Please call me.
To # 45 I have not been living in a shell. As a matter of fact I have been inside the zoo !
I’ve seen things that would make your head spin.
And because everyone else is doing it makes it right !? Where is your hashkafa ?
Oh btw every table had it’s fair share of alchohol provided by the baal simcha.
Ya wanna have fun ? GO BOWLING, ICE SKATING, PLAY BASKETBALL. Maybe even watch a *gasp* movie.
As your name says BE REAL ya don’t need alchohol to “have fun”!
To those of who that don’t believe the story you are entitled to your opinion I will not sit all day and go through every detail over and over.
AND REMEMBER PLEASE DAVEN FOR MICHOEL YECHIEL BEN MIRIAM SORAH !! SAVE MARTIN GROSSMAN!!
Shocking?! Yes it’s happening even amongst the great “mainstream factory’s” hi my name is yecheskel and I’d like to paint you my picture so you have more perspective on your situation. I serve time in the heiliger mir yeshiva. I dress and talk in the same mehalech our good ben Torah’s walk.Inside,however, I have no yirai shomayim left, my neshomo has been lost.I am heavily addicted to substances and need help,but I don’t get it.instead I use drugs,it helps me horeveh in Seder.with my fix I can mamash sit through a shtarker Seder.my wife doesn’t know why I’m so unhappy and unstable. she begs me to talk, all I do is leave the house to supposedly learn, but I’m out getting a fix.the kolkel checks,our parents checks don’t cover the expense,so I “hook” up the other chevrah (from other choshevehyeshivas too) for a finders fee. If you turn me in I’ll finally be able to stop my misrable existence,however the others will be stuck with out their shtickle gehenom for a while and can chad vesholom become sick. I wish there was a chevra that understood this. They told me boroso Torah tavlin,and I cry hashem please help me,my wife,family and all those whom are siufering from this.I’ll just keep on shteiging and hopefully my yetzer horah will just stop tugging at me.
It seems like these kids are living in todays world and are very much a product of it.that dealer needs to be stopped. speak to one of the machanchim involved in dealing with the issue of drugs have him go talk to this kid it’s not long since the wedding and something should be done.BTW 2day I’m sober because those who care for each of us as if we were their own children got me to the right help by the right people. and it wasn’t a quick thinking hot-headed phonecall to the police evwnthough I was poisoning your children and destroying my family. I deserved it, but someone with love extended me a hand not long ago and …
ZPrince although Marijuana has no chemically addictive properties (hence the lacing it with additives)psycologicly it is considered to be one of the most addictive substances around. additionlay
ZPrince although Marijuana has no chemically addictive properties (hence the lacing it with additives) psychologically it is considered to be one of the most addictive substances around. Additionally nothing has changed over the last 40 years and it is still a ‘gateway drug’ leading into other ‘more harmful’ addictions. My point was the perceptions your average kid in high school has today. The same way you or I may have felt about smoking a cigarette 15 years ago is how these kids feel about Marijuana today.
poiuywerty great job on your 14 days keep it up one day at a time. I think you point although perhaps a bit convoluted was that if the kid thought everyone else at the table would be shocked, and possibly call the police he would have taken it out. Which should highlight to everyone reading this the reality of the situation. Our guys don’t see it as the same shock we do.
For those of you saying no way cant be, I personally know of two frum kids, one that was already married with a kid, that died as either a direct result of drugs or the after effects. one of these kids became addicted to painkillers after being prescribed with painkillers due to serious back issues.
The issues are real.
To digress for a second and see what you really think about the issue, would you send your tzadikkle to a yeshiva if at the bechina they were given a drug test?
Of course not,(you would reason subconsiously that must be a bad place) so how can a great mainstream Yeshiva keep out the drugs? Nevuah?
We need to stop worrying about perception of others and deal with reality.
Concerned I’ll call you later today.
To HPO Response:
Once we are on the topic of wasting time, lets count how many times you have used your time so wisely and posted on this topic………..6 times!!! For someone who types that your not going to waste your time and write back on my comment you seem to have lots on it on your hands.
Secondly, you comment about my username was greatly appreciated. You have proven the point to myself and all my friends that told me to use that name to see how many people like yourself are so bored that the best thing they can come up with is to take a hit on the guys username. I wont waste my time on yours by the way.
By the number of posts you have sent in we all see and are very proud that you take this topic so to heart and are so concerned for Klal Yisruel. So please do us all the favor of discontinuing your posts and taking all your feelings on this and putting them into action.
Mishenichnas Adar Marbin B…….BOOZE!!!!!!!!!!!
p.s.-JUICY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I remember, a couple of years ago, when I had the Chutzpah to dare post an article about kids and drugs. Some idiota of a woman sends back a message, “These things don’t happen in our communities”. How wrong she was, even then.
Duvdl
“BUT WHEN DID IT BECOME ACCEPTABLE THAT A TEENAGER SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO THAT AMOUNT OF DRUGS !?!?”
um what amount do you think is acceptable?
im sorry 2 tell u but im in a respectable brooklyn yeshiva i wear a black hat and alot of guys in my yeshiva have or smoke marijuana its a usually stage i feel u should only tell someone tht can help a parent,rebbe or menahel will take this matter the wrong way and throw a boy out of yeshiva and that is wen it all starts the payos get shorter differnt hairstyle start hanging out so on and so forth so if u do want 2 tell someone that can help contact me ill give u numbers of ppl that can help
To the author of this article.
I was one of the “with or without hatters”. I will begin with the drinking situation. The bottle you were refering to of being brought in was only one bottle compared to all the bottles of wine that were throughout the tables of people drinking. There were plenty of people drinking but you only come to the assumtion that only “the boys” are at fault for drinking and enjoying a simcha. We were enjoying ourselves. Did you forget that you were at a wedding? I remember you at the table as well. if you really felt such strong feelings about us, how could you sit with us with your infant in your lap?! you would say as a parent, you would want your child to be safe right? and because we’re “drug users”, which most of us aren’t by the way, you should not have been sitting with us at the table. I feel that you forgot to mention that we brought great vibes to the wedding. we danced for the Bride and Groom, brought smiles to their faces, which this part of their wedding night, along with others, will bring great memories for their future. And one last thing that i would like to mention. Are the Jewish people supposed to talk negative about people? I’m sure Hashem would greatly reward you for spreading such great lashon hara to our fellow jews. I’m assuming that your in the article business so for your next article, please write something that praises jews, not degrading us.
and for all you people who are saying about keeping junkies out of our neighborhood, we are all jews and we look out for each other, not push brothers away
To the author of this article: I think at a wedding you should be more concerne with being misameach chosson V’kallah than with your next oppurtunity to publish an article about your opinion of the guests at the wedding, Im pretty Hashem loves every single Jew the same amount whether they wear black hats or kippah srugah, Hashem loves each and every jew the same and isnt there a mitzvah “Vhalachta Bi Drachav” to emulate G-ds way? part of loving every jew “Vahavta lireacha kamocha” is not judging your fellow jew and criticizing his actions because you have absolutely no idea what each jew’s story is and another mitzvah that is very important is “Dan Likaf Zichus” that you should judge every jew favorably and not jump to conclusions? As noble as you think you are for quote on quote “looking out” for these bochrim- it may be smarter to leave the “judgement” part up to Hashem and worry about yourself an not publish a critique on the internet which is open to the entire world about these young men and in addition to possible loshon hara that can be spread because of this article and motzei shem ra I think this article also condones the act of judging and criticizing Our jewish brothers and sisters in Am yisroel while we shoul be joining them B’simcha, because Mashiach cant come until we are Am echad Bilev Echad!!!! and every day that we harbor sinaas chinam in our hearts we are furthering teh day of the rebuilding of the Beis Hamikdash!
its only the kids in jeans that are bad what about the guys in brisk who smoke weed o thats fine cause theay where black hats tzitis out you are a fool and an idiot for wrighting this
to comment #64 thats a 100% true the only way ppl judge is by the cover and unfortunately thats not the wway it is i have friends who wear jeans and small kippahs and they prbly learn more then the average “black hat” bochur
To #63. I agree with you entirely.
To #64 & #65, I highly disagree with you. No one jew is bad. Hashem put other people throughout tests in life trying to overcome them. So it doesnt matter what they wear, we are all trying to prove ourselves to our true father. Everyone goes though times where they need to fight through. What about the jews who was never raised with judiasm? And the one’s in that situation who overcame that and became religious. We go through times where we need to make the decisions Hashem hints for us to do.
And lastly to the author, I apoligize for the things I had said that should not have been brought up.
to #66 idt we understood eachother i was only saying that unfortunately alot of ppl look at it that way