When the tragic death of a young girl shook the Edison/Highland Park community to its core, Chai Lifeline was able to help her friends, family, and neighbors understand and respond to the incomprehensible event.
Over the course of the last five days, Rabbi Sruli Fried, LMSW, Chai Lifeline’s New Jersey regional director, Norman Blumenthal, Ph.D., director of crisis intervention and bereavement services at the agency, and Zahava Farbman, LCSW, Project CHAI coordinator, worked with educators in three schools to provide information and tools to help children grieve, cope and heal from the loss.
The reverberations of the child’s passing were felt in three schools. Over three days, Rabbi Fried met with the principals and educators of Yeshiva Shaarei Zion girls’ and boys’ elementary school and Rinas High School. The discussions focused on the many possible responses that could be expected among children at different ages, ways to reassure children following an untimely death, and strategies for enabling children and teens to cope with tragedy. Mrs. Farbman’s meeting with the girls of Shaarei Zion gave them an outlet for an outpouring of grief and concern.
Tuesday evening, Rabbi Fried and Dr. Blumenthal responded to the concerns of hundreds of parents at a community meeting at Yeshiva Shaarei Zion. Mothers and fathers received guidance on issues that included grief reactions at different ages, how to talk to children about a friend’s death, and recognizing and responding when sadness morphs into anxiety or depression.
“No words or actions can erase the pain of this family and the community. By providing assistance to schools, shuls, and community organizations, our crisis intervention team aims to ease the anguish of children forced to cope with the horror of untimely death,” said Rabbi Fried.
“While we hope that we never have to do this, Chai Lifeline’s expertise provides a real services to communities in crisis,” added Rabbi Simcha Scholar, executive vice president.
(YWN Desk – NYC)
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9 Responses
Rabbi Sruli Fried is a man with a mission. Countless people have been touched by his awesome abilities. He is a malach disguised as a human.
i was a parent listening to rabbi fried and dr. blumenthal speak last night. They were incredibly supportive, compassionate and answered our many questions in terms of dealing with our own children. May hashem continue to give them the strength and wisdom to do this amazing work (though it is unfortunate that their services are needed at all.) may this new year bring us besuros tovos.
I was also there last night, and I learned so much. Thank you, Dr Blumenthal, Rabbi Fried, Mrs Farbman and Chai Lifeline. Upsetting to learn that most shiva calls are not therapeutic to the mourners. We must remember to be silent and let the mourner speak first. Never ask details about the death. Only simchas for all of klal Yisroel.
What happened? how old is she? can someone please write the details…. thanks.
sruli fried is a real tzadikle
Att: #4
When a family or an individual experiences a traumatic situation, they sometimes prefer not to speak about “What happened?” or “How old was she?” The fact that the individual has passed away is overwhelming and difficult to deal with. Sometimes people feel that their tzaros are becoming fodder for conversation on the street. “Did you hear about…?” When my mother was sick with a devastating illness, my family felt that our mother’s privacy was being invaded when people would ask personal questions about her situation. A person doesn’t become a public property when they are sick. Their privacy should be respected. If someone wants to discuss their illness, etc., they will initiate this in a conversation. Otherwise, perhaps we should respect their privacy. Anonymous
This article is referring to the petirah of a 13 year old girl who had no apparent illness at the time of her death- she simply went to sleep last Thurs. night and returned her neshama to shemayim sometime during the night or early morning hours of Friday . There had been no apparent illness prior to her death. May her memory be a blessing and her family know no more sorrow.
Att.#6 Your comments are true but not relevant here because #4’s questions were directed to a public forum, not to the family of the nifteres. Also I think it is a natural and acceptable outcome of such an article for readers to want some backround info- not for dishonorable purposes, but for any knowledge which may be relevant to them personally. For example, did the person die of the flu…. which was NOT the case here. That being said, there is also an article in the Hamodia about this tragedy and I am fairly certain it wasn’t published without the permission of the parents. So a certain amount of information does sometimes become public knowledge. We should be dan l’chaf zchus and hope that such information and discussions result in good things happening to honor the memory of the deceased person.
May Hashem give the family strength to get through this terrible tragedy. They should know no more sorrow.
I am truly sorry for the girls who lost a classmate. It is wonderful that they are receiving the help they are getting.
However, the article unfortunately fails to recognize that these girls were the child’s classmates for only one year – there is a whole other class of girls in another school who are grieving for a friend who was with them from their toddler years thru sixth grade, and kept in touch with her since her family moved.
It’s a shame that for whatever reason, the community in which the family lived for most of her years is not getting the same guidance. She leaves behind a second community who will always love her and miss her dearly. Not just our daughters – her oldest friends- but everyone who had the zechus to know her. She touched many peoples lives – from young to old, and we are all better for having known her.