I was surprised to read the letter decrying the incentives being offered to children to fundraise for tzedakah organizations. The letter writer, while I’m sure well-intentioned, seems to have entirely missed the main issue that he was so clearly pointing to.

You’re upset about the prizes. You think they’re corrupting our children, turning tzedakah into a transaction rather than an act of chesed. You believe that without these flashy incentives, kids would be learning to give for the right reasons, and that these campaigns are destroying a generation of gomlei chasadim.

You’re wrong.

Not because it isn’t tragic that children today need to be “bribed” to do something good, but because you’re completely missing the reality of the world we live in. You want to blame the tzedakah organization for offering these prizes? Fine. But tell me—do you really think they want to eat into their own fundraising dollars just to hand out expensive toys and vacations? Do you think they wouldn’t rather inspire children to give wholeheartedly, without any incentive? Of course, they would. But they’re not naive. They understand today’s children, because they understand today’s society.

And here’s the harsh truth: this is not a problem created by fundraising campaigns. This is a problem created by us.

We have raised a generation that sees everything—every effort, every sacrifice—as something that must be rewarded. We did this, not by offering prizes for tzedakah campaigns, but by demonstrating, day in and day out, that materialism is what matters. Our children watch their parents chase after the latest trends, stress over what’s “in” and what’s not, and spend absurd amounts of money to keep up. They see a world where success is defined by status symbols. So why are we shocked when they internalize that mindset and apply it to tzedakah as well?

You lament that children won’t give unless there’s a reward. But you fail to ask the more pressing question: Why do they feel that way in the first place?

We are the ones who shaped their expectations. We are the ones who conditioned them to expect something in return for their efforts. We are the ones who taught them that everything—even the most selfless of acts—must come with a payoff. And yet, instead of acknowledging our role in this, you’d rather attack a tzedakah organization for adapting to the reality we’ve created.

If you truly want to raise a generation of gomlei chasadim, then start at home. Show your children what it means to give without expectation. Model a life where tzedakah and chesed are priorities, not just talking points. Teach them—through your own actions—that fulfillment comes not from what you receive, but from what you give.

Because if children today need prizes to be motivated to do the right thing, that’s not a failing of the tzedakos trying to fundraise. That’s a failing of the world we’ve built for them.

Signed,

D.R.

The views expressed in this letter are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of YWN. Have an opinion you would like to share? Send it to us for review.