A lot has been written lately about materialism and attempting to identify the root problem in our communities. Practically speaking, pointing a finger at materialism is a useless exercise because the issue is so deeply rooted within us that simply talking about is unlikely to make any difference.
The truth of the matter is that the root of materialism stems from חטא אדם הראשון (see מ”נ פ”א) and is put right with the Mitzvah קדושים תהיו – פרושים תהיו – קדש עצמך במותר לך. However, by definition, the application of this Mitzvah will always be limited to the special individuals among us and will not include the masses. The reason for this is that it takes a heavy dose of קדושה to have the אזנים לשמוע what this Mitzvah is about, and being that most of us are out of touch and don’t really understand the underlying fundamentals of the issue, it’s a goal we’ll never attain. With this in mind: if we are going to make any progress within our communities, we have to identify the perceptions we are able to relate to with a practical plan of action to halt the downtrend.
The primary difficulty here is answering a simple question some of us are fortunate enough to have: “If I have the means to spend the money, what do I gain by not spending it?”
Lets consider: We have all heard endless stories of גדולי ישראל who lived in dire poverty and became what they became under those circumstances. What is less commonly known are the numerous stories of the people who wouldn’t change their living conditions even when their financial circumstances changed. They lived with the principle of, “You don’t do things just because you can.” But why did they live by this principle?
Let’s put that to the side for a minute. On the macro level, the issue is that the accepted practice is to spend what you are able to, because why not? But from this arises a problem: if you don’t spend extravagantly, it’s assumed that you don’t have the means to spend a lot. People don’t want to be perceived as poor, so they begin spending even beyond their means, simply to prove that they can spend the money, even if they can’t! This results in a never-ending cycle of everyone spending money well beyond their means just so that the Cohen’s next door don’t think they don’t have the means to do so.
This isn’t so with those rags to riches story mentioned above. They have the mindset that just because you can, isn’t a reason to do. Just because they can afford a multi-million dollar house is not a reason for them to get one. And see how intelligent that is! They don’t get caught up in the cycle of having to spend just to show that they are able to – they stay completely out of it.
A second facet of this is the notion that if you don’t spend massive amounts of money, you will lose out on the finer things in life, like a luxurious vacation. This leaves people feeling hopelessly deprived. Once again, rags to riches stories who wind up living simply don’t have this. They don’t get concerned with how “yennem” is living; they take a look at their life and ask themselves, “What do I need to live happily?”
So, how do we address this root problem? By cultivating a mentality of self-awareness. Be aware of what you need, not what your friend/neighbor/cousin needs. It’s irrelevant to you. And chances are, if you got in touch with yourself, you’ll notice that you don’t need all those trappings you’ve become convinced that you do need.
To this end, there is a big role rabbanim can play in achieving this, by speaking to their kehillos and setting takanos against extravagant parties. This has already been done in some Chasidish communities; there’s no reason we can’t do it too. This way, even if some continue making ostentatious parties, people who can’t spend massive amounts of money can easily pin their lack of spending on takanos, because there’s no shame in following a rav’s guidelines.
Mordechai from Yerushalayim
NOTE: The views expressed here are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of YWN.
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10 Responses
Gut gezogt.
You asked in your beautiful letter ” why would a person want to put money aside to save it if they have the opportunity to spend it on a nice vacation that’s gone forever a week later?”
Did YOU ever think about saving money on the side for your children upcoming expensive weddings and Bar Mitzvah money etc….? How about for their education? Tuition money is very expensive today and that’s not talking about college when they become adults. Or one more example did you ever think about the future to try to save up money to IYH one day buy a house for your family to live in without staying on rent for life? And maybe trying to have more then just the minimum %20. Downpayment for the house so that in the end you’ll be saving yourself and your entire family thousands of dollars of extra mortgage interest rates.
Aren’t these smarter things to save extra money on the side for the future then to just rush to a restaurant or on a vacation?
Every thing that a person does and has in this world makes an impression on his neshoma and eternity when you eat a kugel it’s not just another pleasure there is a din and cheshbone on everything had and what he did not have it makes an impression on the person in shamayim there is no such thing as having to much money and now you eat a veal chulent does not exist that God should say to indulge rather then learn torah with your might hashem had a cheshbone on every person some are more confusing then others but like it says in Koheleth “dah ki al kol elah bamishpat” no person can really claim that there is a free lunch especially if it takes him from a brisker rov or a Zohar
What the person writes is maybe that people are judging people and want to look healthy in the eyes of others and the goyim also this subject maybe am maybe not writing about but we all say “es amolenu elu habonim”
There is also a gemora I think that Hillel that was a very poor person ran in front of a person that was very rich cause he thought that this person needed it for his wealth this means that sometimes the mazel is that the person will have this money
It is very sad the material lifestyle of america where children need a sugar and when older a big chulent like its ruchniyos rather then bring proud of who are as a human
@.
You have a gevaldige point!
But, please write with punctuations (and better grammar), so will be easier for us to read.
Maybe explain why our grandparents were happy with a lot less then we have. You still haven’t explained the recent spike in materialism.
Great article..lets start with used seforim
When your son starts 9th grade
Do you buy him a brand new gemorah, chumish, peni yehoshua etc or do you give him yours from 10 -15 years ago.
Do you hand down any of your artscroll books to your kids that you don’t use any more , or do they NEED brand new.
Do we run to a used seforim store to buy or is everything new??
Is all the seforim you bought over the years, only good for shamos or are they given to your kids ,grandkids ??
That is a very great idea. Only problem is that by the yeshiva velt, takanos don’t generally work. There is very little dedication from the masses for our supposed leaders. By the chassidim, there is more of a sense of belonging to something. So takanos have a much better odds of working .
Two examples: first example: many years ago, the Roshei yeshiva and rabbanim came out with wedding takaknos. No more than 400 people and several other takanos. The takana was not to make a large wedding, and not to attend such a wedding. Do you know who were the first people to violate these takanos? These same Roshei yeshiva and rabbanim, that signed the takanos. You know why? They said; a simple person shouldn’t have a big oilam. 400 should be enough. But I am a Rosh Yeshiva with many contacts from all over. So I have no choice. Same thing with attending such a wedding. How could I not go and officiate this guy’s wedding? He is one my biggest supporters.
Second example: by Covid, hundreds of people signed on that after Covid, we will not make big weddings. You know how long that lasted? Until one day after covid. All those gvirim that were looking really sincere during covid, threw it all out the window the minute the nisayoin came to them.
So takanois is not the real answer. Rather, people need to come to their senses, and eventually they do, one way or another. One of 3 things generally happen.
1) they earn enough to keep up with the neighbors, without going into debt. That is a small minority.
2) they go into debt, until they hit bottom. That is the majority.
3) they had a good upbringing, had good rebbeim, and most importantly, a good wife, and don’t follow the masses, but follow the RBSO, and live within their means, and if they have more, increase tzedakah and Chesed, and don’t spend their lives chasing oilam hazeh, pretending that they are good yidden, because they daven with a minyan and learn Daf Yomi .
Another thief who can’t get his mind off other people’s money…………….
when i grew up in the 60’s and 70’s you knew who an oisher was by the house he lived in(you couldnt get big mortgages ) and by the car he drove (no leasing then)
today everyone plays oisher
the real problem is that we have created a society where the gvir is worshipped staring from the rabonnim all the way down
you can have an adirei hatorah convention every month
wont help
the youth want to be the gvir not the kollel person who now actually makes 13,500 @year
thats the chinuch we have imparted to the generation
they dont want the kollel salary they want the executive director(former) cash settlement