By Rabbi Yair Hoffman for 5tjt.com
Written in honor of the Aufruf of Neshama Cohen’s Brother
AUFRUF
- Aufruf is a yiddish term which means calling up. It refers to the calling up of the groom to the Torah prior to his wedding.
CHOSSON NEEDS SHMIRAH
2. A chosson should not walk alone and requires protection. Technically, however, the Shulchan Aruch rules (EH 64:1) that this applies only after the wedding itself takes place. The Eliyahu Rabbah (OC 669), however, writes that a Chosson is considered a Melech even before the wedding. The Bikkurei Yaakov indicates that it is from the beginning of the week of the wedding. Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach zt”l suggests that it begins on the Motzai Shabbos before the wedding – even though the Aufruf takes place earlier (See Shalmei Simcha p. 121).
3. There are two reasons for the Shmirah. In Pirkei D’Rebbe Eliezer (Chapter 16) the indication is that it is on account of Kavod – honor – just as a king does not go out in the marketplace alone – so too does a Chosson not go out alone. The Gemorah in Brachos 54b, however, writes that there are three that require protection, a choleh, and a chosson and Kallah. The Tosfos Ri writes that it is because the Satan is mekatraig during a time of Simcha.
4. Rav Shlomo Zalman ruled that if a Chosson does not have anyone to accompany him to shul – he should go anyway, since nowadays there are many others on the road.
5. The Yaavetz in his Hagaos to Brachos 54b indicates that a Chosson should not be alone in his house.
6. A child is sufficient to be considered a Shomer if he or she has reached the age of instruction, according to many Poskim. Some say that there is a minimum age of nine years of age.
THE ALIYAH TO THE TORAH (AUFRUF)
ASHKENAZIC CUSTOM
7. It is the custom among Ashkenazim for the groom to be called to the Torah on the Shabbos before the wedding. This is called, “Shabbos sh’mezamrin lo – the Shabbos that they sing to him.” [It appears that the custom was that they sing to the groom at the time that he is called up to the Torah, after he has recited the bracha that comes after the reading].
WHEN THERE ARE OTHERS TO BE CALLED
8. This obligation [of calling the groom up to the Torah] comes before the obligation to call up anyone else who has an obligation to receive an
WHEN THERE IS A YARTZEIT
9. Even if someone has a Yartzeit that week, wherein there is an absolute obligation to be called to the Torah, even so a groom on the Shabbos where he receives an Aliyah.
WHEN THE WEDDING WILL NOT TAKE PLACE THAT WEEK
10. The obligation to give an Aliyah to the groom on the Shabbos prior to his wedding is even if the wedding will not take place that week, rather he is travelling to make the wedding in a different city that is distant from there. However, this is only if on the Shabbos before the wedding he will be in transit. However, young men that are travelling from the Yeshiva and on the Shabbos before the wedding there will be an Aliyah to the Torah as is normal, and this will be their last Shabbos in Yeshiva, this is not called “The Shabbos that they sing to him.” However, if they nonetheless give him the Aliyah this is considered “Simchas HaChassan – bringing joy to the ”
NOT A REGULAR AT THE SHUL
11. If the groom does not regularly daven in this Shul, he does not set aside those who regularly attend the shul. If he davens in this shul during the week but does not daven there on Shabbos, he is not considered a regular attendee, and he does not set aside others that are obligated in receiving an
FATHER OF THE GROOM
12. The custom is that the father of the groom also receives an Aliyah to the Torah on this Shabbos. However, he does not set aside anyone else who is obligated in receiving an
CUSTOM OF SEFARDIM
13. In Sefardic congregations, it is the custom for the groom to receive a Aliyah on the Shabbos after the
THROWING CANDY
14. It is permitted to throw candies on the groom. This is not considered degrading food items if they are wrapped in
SHABBOS CHAZON
15. A groom that receives his Aliyah on Shabbos Chazon – everything is conducted as normal – even if it is the Shabbos upon which Tisha B’Av falls. One sings to him in the normal manner. Included in this is permission to sing to the groom on his way to shul – to those who have that custom.
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11 Responses
Aufruf is a German word that means call, proclamation, or announcement. Like much of Eastern European Judaism, it was taken from the goyim and made part of our language and culture.
Is yiddish adopted from Indo-European languages in any case?
OrechDin:
How do you go from defining a word to defining a culture?
Aufruf in German means calling up in English. It is a custom to give maftir to a chasan before the wedding and an aliya after the wedding, A story is attributed to the Satmar Rav ztz’l who was asked, who gets the maftir first a Chasan or a Bar Mitzva boy? He answered whoever is older.
Yiddish is an Indo European language.
Yiddish is Germanic, with lots of hebrew, slavic, aramiac, & french mixed in
OrechDin
Reb Eliezer
many words that one may find in english are originally rooted in latin, greek and other languages, do people still call such words english? yes. they do still call them english words.
can you find yiddish words in the oxford english dictionary? does make the yiddish become english words?
is chutzpah yiddish? maybe chutzpah is rooted in hebrew, and is really a hebrew word, and not yiddish?
once one delves deeply into theoretical linguistics, one may learn that common language definitions may not be a simple they at first appear.
in this case, this author may be correct in this context and correctly defining “Aufruf” as “a yiddish term”.
if this author was writing a thesis on language study or theoretical linguistics, maybe this author could have deep dived a bit more into root and history of the above mentioned word definition.
Can the chosson send a shliach (messenger/proxy) to get the alyiah on his behalf?
If the kiddushin can be done through a shaliach, wouldn’t the aufruf be also allowed via a shaliach?!
This could be relevant in unforeseen situations that the chosson is unable to attend shul on shabbos before wedding, such as if the chosson came down with a bad flu/COVID, should he appoint a shaliach?
If so, that a shaliach can be appointed, does this shaliach’s aliyah come before the obligation to call up anyone else who has an obligation to receive an aliyah?
“Eliyahu Rabbah (OC 669), however, writes that a Chosson is considered a Melech even before the wedding”
Many rabbonim deride the custom of the audience people standing when the chosson and kallah are walked to the chuppah. They claim it comes from non-jewish practices. However, if a chosson and kallah are indeed considered a Melech and Malka even before the chuppah – it would make sense to stand in their honor even when they are merely being walked to the chuppah.
Yet, rabbonim don’t seem to follow such a view.
“Written in honor of the Aufruf of Neshama Cohen’s Brother” – is that chosson’s claim to fame, that his yichus is that he is the brother of Neshama Cohen?! Not even his name!
Pre-modern times, the Shabbos Aufruf was called Shabbos Shpinholz שבת שפינהאלץ, as found in Maharil in Hilchos Tisha Bav that he celebrated this on the Shabbos before his son’s wedding (though it was Shabbos Chazon). It is also brought in Beer Hetev 551. It is not clear exactly what Shpinholz means, but it is some celebration on the Shabbos before the Chasunah.
The minhag used to be to throw nuts. Nitey Gavriel (Nisuin 2:3 footnote 4) says that the reason is because nuts have a shell, it symbolizes tznius of kallah. Nitey Gavriel (Nisuin 2:3 footnote 4) gives a second reason, namely, that egoz represents cheit (because in gematria they both equal 18) and the chasan is forgiven for his avonos, so it is symbolic of throwing away his sins. Sheim Mishmuel (Ki Teitzei, page 134) writes that just like when a nut falls in the mud, the inside is still protected because of the shell, so too, when one gets married, it comes with responsibility and dealing with the world of gashmiyus (physicality) as a husband must begin to work so as to ensure he can support his family. Thus, we ensure to give the chasan chizuk by sending him a message that even though he now will enter the world of the physical as he goes to work, he needs to ensure that his inside remains pure and connected to Hashem’s will.
Mishna Brura 171 says that you shouldn’t throw food that can get gross and mushy because that will make a mess of the Sefer Torah, shul, and chasan. This may also violate bal tashchis—wasting food.
The basis for such a minhag of throwing nuts (or rice) is from the Gemara Brachos 50a, which says that they used to throw food at the chasan and kallah at their wedding, and the Gemara Kesubos 15b which says that when a besula gets married, they would give candies to the kids. Rashi in both places says that they would do so because it is a siman bracha.