Yesterday, a different type of Tu Bishvat celebration took place. But not the kind one would normally expect.
Haaretz reports (excerpts):
According to 16th-century Kabbalist Rabbi Isaac Luria, two days a year a year – Tu B’Shvat and Tu B’Av – are the most propitious times for fertility and finding a mate. Rabbi David Batzri holds special services on those days that attract hundreds of unattached men and women from all over Israel – as well as worried parents.
From Batzri’s yeshiva – the sound of prayers could be heard. Batzri composed special prayers for the occasion, among them: “Have mercy on me and bring me a beautiful, God-fearing wife of good character, smart and successful and blessed, for by this I can worship God without distraction.”
One high point in the service, which went on for seven hours, was when the sexton distributed shofars to the men, who by blowing them believe they can speed up the appearence of their life-partner, as Batzri’s son, Rabbi Itzhak Batzri, explains. As the shofars blared, eyes overflowed with tears in the women’s section of the synagogue.
The height of the service is when Batzri tosses hard candy at the congregation, with a promise that those who catch it will find a match.
Outside, energetic matchmakers approached unattached men and women, jotting down information.
“In recent years,” Rabbi Batzri says, “you see not only older unmarried people, but young ones, too. Today the problem is not only that people don’t find, but people are afraid to decide.”
In answer to the obvious question, why not bring together the unmarried men and women who were congregating on different floors of the building, Batzri said, “People don’t come here to meet. You can meet someone at the grocery store. They come here to ask the Holy One, blessed be He, for a match.”
(Click HERE to see the last story YWN reported about Rabbi Batzri.)
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43 Responses
I think the only surefire way to stop this shidduch crisis is to annul the cheirim Rabbein Gershon. The execess of unmarried girls in relation to boys will decrease if you have 1 to 2 wives per husband.
Oh yeah, those grocery stores! That’s where it’s at!
So catching candy is now the solution? Please. How is this any different from the Gentile custom of the bride tossing her bouquet to all the bridesmaids?
At Chassidishe Tishen, the Rebbe often tosses apples or matzos to people as a simon Bracha.
Are you for real uchiknow? How would you like it if you were one of the 1 of 2 wives? my gosh. No way should that be an option.
5, not to worry. If minor dina d’malchusa dina weren’t an issue and anyone seriously meant this, the shidduch crisis might abate, but the tuition crisis would rocket beyond anything imaginable.
Letter to the YW Editor
Comments 1, 2 & 3 are totally uncalled for.
Please have a minimum of good judgement before you let any silly or bad natured person post his comments.
The height of the service is when Batzri tosses hard candy at the congregation, with a promise that those who catch it will find a match.
What we need is less magic and more tefillah.
Outside, energetic matchmakers approached unattached men and women, jotting down information.
They say that the effectiveness of the segula of going to Amuka to find a shidduch was vastly reduced once they put up a mechitza along the whole walkway outside.
CWY!
where do you think they got it from?
i guess all the shadchanim should start going into the “grocery store” buissnes!
I don’t trust mekubalim that charge money exploiting other people’s tzaros.
to #3 “cwy”…klutz ,we’re talking here about ones who are still looking,and by the way we have minhagim of throwing things on bride and groom, see mesachtes ketsubos perek 2 first mihsnah , also on chuson bavarf see, shulcun urech ohrech chaim hilchos seudah(171 seuf 5),so their customs are prob. derieved from us..as you know he was jewish. EG. ask any gentile why one says “g-d bless” when someone sneezes? why not when one cleans ears or why say it altogether?…we say because of a “pirkey d’reb lazer” (brucos daf 53 gilyon hashas {reb akivah eiger})see interesting tam there….
1,
Stopping the Cheirim D Rabeinu G’ would defintily be a ‘field day’ for every potnetial Kollel Man. Instead of only ONE wife bringing in the income, he could have three or four or even more…..IMAGINE the yearly salary every home can benefit from?
to #1 (uthiknow).. #1 polygamy illegal in western countries(on the other hand we can move to middle east..) #2 will our food stamps increase?
why the complaints? theres nothing like free candy! p.s. does anyone know what type of candy it was or as to the status of the kashrus- i was hoping 2 get my hands on some. and hey! beware- 2 wives = 2 shviggers!
Hashem wants us to pray and do Hishtadlus.
another thing with all the shidduch “fiesta”
if guys and girls would stop blaming one another
and get their priority’s straight “what does
marriage mean to them and what is the most
important things that apply to a marriage it
wouldn’t be an issue.
my rabbi always tells me, three things need to apply.
(1)do you feel comfortable with her!
(2) can you see her as being the mother of your children, raising them the way you want them raised.
(3) one thing that you cant stand about her:)
perfect now you can get married.
A rabbi once said to me stop looking for the 100% or 75%
look for the 50% and you are 50% that makes you guys 100%.
all those who think about stopping Chairem Drabenu Gershon are not taking into consideration a very important point.
2 OR MORE SHVEGARS.
to #8..”blue pinky”..can you refer us to “they say” who is this person “they say”..this is some kind of magic undebatable blank statement, like those debates where someone throws statement like “studies have shown” so if “studies have shown” its not debateable…and where are those “studies” and who were behind these “studies”..but if “studies have shown” so its “k’moshe mepi h’gvurah” ….
I believe that it was R’ Yaakov Kaminetzky, ZT”L, who once told an older bochur who had asked him what he thought about the idea of him (ie, the bochur) going to EY to visit Amuka or other similar places as a segula to get married,
“Dee beste segula is tzu zay’n maidlach.”
[“The best segula is to see (ie, date) girls.”]
to #3 uchiknow..its not the candies that count its your emunahs tzaddikim that counts..the holy “reb itzik’l of psehvorke” used to give certain machel motzei shabbos at his malveh malke those who got were “noysha” with zevigem, children, so its not what particular food that is given by a tzadik that counts… (mekor of this princeble Avrom
Uvinu was nitzel from kivshom hoeish…his brother not…see rashsi B’reishis 11 posik 28)
So let me get this straight- He’s throwing candy and who ever catches it will get married. So if you’re a good athlete or really tall you’re more likely to catch the candy.
Is this what Judaism is being reduced to!
Can someone please explain the connection between catching candy and getting married? Is it a mitzvah to catch candy? On what z’chus are you now going to find your bashert?
sounds like an Aufruf(hey maybe that’s where this came from)!!!throwing candy? you gotta be kidding!
and if anyone thinks it’s an easy life with one wife-now you guys wanna try 2!! you’ll be bankrupt before you can blink(besides the fact its totally aser)!!
Doesn’t the lakewood ‘freezer’ open on Tu’bshvat. Ironic!
An alternative solution is to open some Aish Hatorah yeshivos in China! there they have the reverse problem a severe gender imbalance in the population with more boys than girls (due to population controls of one child per family).
tzippi, better a tuition crisis than a shidduch crisis! Obviously pru u’rvu will be much better fulfilled if there is a tuition crisis.
nameless, there is still the additional costs of supporting wives 2+ and their additional offspring. presumably the costs would outweigh any financial benefits, and hence we can assume it’ll be lshem mitzvah.
to #21 cwy…see #20, also don’t throw these cliches’ around (..is this what judaism reduced to..) were talking here of a segulah ,see #20, not judaisim. judaisim consists of taryag mitzvohe wiyh torah s’balbeh that goes with it (one and indivisible..) and were not discussing that!!
Joseph,
I am talking about men who want to ‘kvetch benk’ for eternity!
to #8..”blue pinky”..can you refer us to “they say” who is this person “they say”..this is some kind of magic undebatable blank statement… etc.
I don’t know who “they” are, or if they even exist. Read that comment again. It’s called sarcasm. Take it for what it’s worth, or don’t, whatever suits you.
Someone please show me the source where it says catching a candy guarantees that you’ll find your match.
excuse, want to make clearer #25…to #21 cwy..See #20. Also, don’t throw these cliches’ around (…is this what judaisim is reduced to…) we’re talking here about segulahs, see # 20, not judaisim. Judaisim consists of 613(taryag) mitzvohs with torah sh’balpeh (arbey chelkay shulchen urech) that goes with it(…one and indivisible…) and we’re not discussing that..also from your tone of writing you dont sound like you belive in this 1)(..is this what judaisim etc.(#21)..2)so catching candy is now the solution (#3)..so why bother showing your face on “Yeshivah world” ??
If we wereserious about the shiduch crisis we would have community singles gatherings.
The shidduch crisis is not caused by one element. Cherem Rabeinu gershom and pilegesh heterim may solve the crisis but it will only cause other problems (broken families). Also, women, in general, wwould never consent to being a “second fiddle.” It is foolish for singles to put their trust in some rebbe or some chassidishe cult ritual. Moral: Tevakaish rachamim meeMee sheboroh haolam. Daven to Hashem and go out and may He help those people in need of a shidduch.
To # 1
The only problem with your solution is-it means 2 shviggers.
candies may be good 4 shidduchim but their terrible 4 ur teeth- decide 4 urself? tooth decay, gingivitis, cavities, etc.- not worth it.
Not a bad idea from UCHIKNOW (comment #1)
Just imagine one wife can work and the other can stay home with the kids while the husband sits and learns. No more Polish/Russian/Ukrainian babysitters needed to raise our tayereh kinder. Its a win win situation all around!!
To # 33
…and 2 Shvers, one rich and one chashuv.
As the saying goes “You can have your cake and eat it too”
uuhh…. explain plz???!!!
i mean it might be an extra zichus to catch the candy but that shouldn’t be the ” SOLUTION”!
i think the solution is that everybody should look inside PEOPLE and not inside their BANK ACCOUNTS!
as for the grocery stores – which guys start talking to girls on aisle 5? ( and visa versa) i mean come on ! the grocery store is definetly not the place.
Joseph “there is still the additional costs of supporting wives 2+ and their additional offspring. presumably the costs would outweigh any financial benefits”
Joseph, buddy, economies of scale – come on, you know how it works, ok, you would need a bigger house, but not 2plus houses (biggest expense), hand-me-downs: no longer go to the neighbor, just to a different wing in the same house. built in baby sitters. for those in the US, extra children for the eligible child Tax credit (4 wifes at 10 kids per wife = a refundable credit that would more than cover the extra pairs of shoes, the mabeline, the…
hold on, my wife is coming post this as “anonymous”
How about calming down the insane amounts of money people spend on weddings [and c”v get sick over]… hmm… instead of making a tzedaka collection to pay for the wedding—let there be a fund that REWARDS people who make simple weddings with just some cake or something. Let the parents spend a few thousand on the wedding instead of a few TENS of thousands, and then give the couple a nice big reward of 10,000 or so to get their lives started together…
At the same time, lets abandon the insanity of marching, singing, speeches at the chuppah…. Come on already — do people have nothing to do with their time, than to sit for 45min+ watching the “show”? Sometimes a few nights in a row? I’m sure we could spend the time better–with our spouses, children, learning, whatever…
to # 27 blue pinky..or maybe you shouldnt throw around empty sayings “gam evil ki machrish l’chochom yaychoshov”..mishly 17 posik 28
The candy idea isn’t new. It’s an old minhag. Most people throw candy at an aufruf and back in Europe, they would throw fruits and/or nuts. It’s supposed to be a bracha for the couple.
One high point in the service, which went on for SEVEN hours,
—————————-
Chill out everyone! Their were other things going on besides throwing candies, like DAVENING.
btw, do any of you dip the apple in the honey on Rosh hashana? it’s a SYMBOL.
also after seven hours they were hungry:)
I’ve got it!
Let’s have the “Lakewood freezer” relocated to….. a GROCERY STORE!
Let people meet each other on their own without Shiduchim already. The Shiduch scene is a sad joke. Perhaps all the Loshon Hora spoken in the Shiduch scene cause people to remain single?