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It is against the US law to kick out minors under 18 and not only is it illegal.
Imagine if the news got the story that a 16 year old was kicked out of his house by his parents for watching Movies and listing to music.
It would not go over very well
I was using the internet in 1994, it was NOT new in 2002. The only thing that occured around 2002 was that everyone started having high speed internet connections (DSL and Cable Modems) in their houses instead of just at their jobs
Mass uses of Cell phones date back to around 1986 when the Cell was inveted (Prior to that a different system was used).
Fine iPods are new, but WALKMANS and DISCMANS date back to the 1980’s
the following advice is not really for the OP
Ive seen people here discuss drinking wine touched from an OTD child and my Brother-in-law also disussed it regarding a “Rasha” child.
Ive also seen stories where OTD children were forced to eat from paper plates (as opposed to real Dishes)
(Both cases occured in the Frum parents house so Kashruth was not an issue)
This is terrible advice and behavior I have seen, Not only will you not bring back the person, you will make them even more angry.
Tough Love as some have suggested is not always the best medicine, It CAN and DOES backfire
Tis better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all
If the only way we can sell our children Torah is by forbidding everything else, then we are bankrupt.
-R Shlomo Freifeld
OP
I knew people who called themselves FFB-WSL (Frum from Birth With Slight Lapses)
They freely admit they were wild as a teenager and accept this, its not uncommon. And frankly I dont think its so terrible.
Look I know its against your Haskafa, but watching movies isnt as terrible as it sounds. Look I know many here will argue, But given the choice of watching movies or hanging out with his friends and possibly doing physical harm to himself. Which do you prefer?
I do think you need to seperate “spirtual Harm” vs actual “Physical harm” . One can easily do teshuva from Spirual harm and I know of plenty who did, however there is no teshuva from “Physical Harm”
Gweneth Paltrow and Gabrielle Giffords (They are first cousins) are decendents of The Taz
Every teenager has some rebeliniousness and I am not looking forward to it, but its the truth.
You will have to decide which battles to pick and which not to let go, not all those things on that list are so terrible (Maybe from your haskafa they are, but they are really not)
The #1 battle Id recommend is if he doesnt want to go to Yeshiva Gedola, accept that, but he has to do SOMETHING CONSTRUCTIVE. If it means getting a job or going to secular college accept that. Hanging out doing nothing is unacceptable. But make him do SOMETHING constructive even if its off your Hashkafa. Getting a Job or Secular college is not “religious” (In his terms) but it will at least teach responsibility. You can work from there.
It is Your house and you do have to make some boundaries, but they might not all be boundaries you would like
Without being Nosy, What is the definition OFF THE DEREACH
Does Off the Dereach mean , he refuses to wear a Black hat, Learn for 12 hours a day and Daven 3 times a day
Does OTD mean he listens to Rock Music and play Video Games
Or does OTD mean
He hangs out with his friends Friday Night at the Local McDonalds
You just proved my point, the teachers WERE unqualified.
IMO the WORST answer I have ever been given, “Its a Kasher on a Maiser” to this day I HATE that answer.
The truth is most teachers at jewish schools are UNQUALIFIED and I dont mean they dont know the material. They very well might know the material, but it doesnt mean they know how to convey that.
And they dont know how to handle kids, An uncaring teacher who knows the material and doesnt care about the kids is as useless as a teacher who doesnt know the material.
And the reason the teachers are unqualified is the pay and teacher requirements. Many schools pay the teachers low pay and engage in nepotism, instead of hiring the best candidates they hire people with nepotism who are willing to accept the low pay, delayed paychecks and is friends or a relative of the Menahel.
In the girl schools they hire 19 year old girls who stay until they are married and then they usually leave.
Sorry a 19 year old girl is not qualified to teach teenagers
Matzos always give me digestive trouble. And I don’t like staying up too late for the sedorim. 2 AM is the limit for m
I had that problem until I tried Spelt Matza. I dont know if its available where you live. But if it is, try it.
I had digestive issues, but this year I used it exclusively and had no troubles
I wonder if the Askanim were all up in arms when the Telephone, Electricity , Automobile , printed press etc where invented
@Chassidic Gatesheader
last Summer I went to Italy and flew home from Venice.
Because I was using miles I flew Luftansa and had to change planes in Frankfurt.
It was real strange actually being in Germany and even weirder going through German Immigration (You have to go through immigration even though I never left the airport)
I basically had to show my paper to a Large German Guard and made sure I spoke ENGLISH to him
There isnt any thing holy about Borchst , Macaroons, Gefilte Fish in a jar and Egg Kichel.
In fact because of the Disgusting Gefilte Fish in a Jar I refused to eat ANY Gefilte Fish for 20 years
Just because something was done in the past, doesnt mean it should be repeated
Yeshivas used to have EATING DAYS, because there wasnt enough food. Should we go back to those days.
You are supposed to be SIMCHA on Yom Tov, I doubt many people have Simcha eating Gefilte Fish from a Jar, Streits Matza, Borscht , Macroons , Egg Kichel and other “Goodies” of Peseach
The Brooklyn Dodgers unofficial Motto was
Wait Til Next Year
Dont we say something similar at the Sedar and on Yom Kippur and elsewhere
@kaykay
Too bad I missed you last night at the game.
I cant say I had an awesome time because the Mets Lost, Its a lot better when they win.
Just ask your Rav how many Averos all those people at yesterday and Todays Mets (I am sure there were alot today as well, they had the $2.50 tickets) game committed.
You dont have to go , but dont tell people its assur and that things like Prizus and immorality occur, when they dont (especially Sunday Afternoon games when there are ALOT of Kids there, including Frum kids)
@Gefen you were the first to get it
And for the record, most people are actually dressed more tzniutly at a game than elsewhere.
Many people (I dont though) wear a Jersey of their favorite players and Football and Baseball Jerseys and these are Tzniut.
No SANE person dressed Untzniut at a Football game,especially in November and December
The fans in the stands engaging in profanity and dressed pritzusdik.
Dont Ride the Subway especially in the Summer, The D and F Trains go to the Beaches in Coney Island
What immorality or Pritzus occurs at a game? Even the Players are dressed Tzniut with arms and legs covered.
As far as cursing, that occurs everywhere. I dont have to go to a game to hear that, Just ride the busses or subways or drive a car and cut someone off.
IMO the more common Seferim will remain in book form due to Shabbos/Yom Tov issues. (Like Shas, S”A, Chumash etc)..And Even Shas, the more Common Meschtas will be in Book (Like Gitten, Baba Metzia), but some of the Zeraim or Taharot which are rarely learned would benefit from ebooks
however the secondary Seforim will be more on eBook formats especially with higher printing costs and frankly space issues.
Probably 90% of Learning is done from 10% of Seforim.
People dont seem to know the difference between Halacha and Hashkafa.
Most of the people I saw at the game were Yeshivish (Not even MO) but I dont think ive ever saw Chassidim at a Mets game (Maybe they are Yankee fans and go there , I dont know)
Certainly If I saw Rav Sheinberg at a Baseball game I would be taken a little aback, but for a normal person not really.
One is not Allowed to Daven in a place of Tumah, and as DHocker said, He saw 4 Minyanim there (There might have been more) Ive seen Minyanim at the game, In fact Ive even seen Minyanim in the stands.
DJ Hockers numbers are probably more correct than mine as I was mostly at field level where the tickets were higher priced
If your Hashkafa is not to go, that is fine and nobody is forcing you to go, but dont claim its ASSUR or anything. It is ASSUR to declare something ASSUR when in fact it Muttar.
But of course you are free to take a personal vow not to go.
I just got back from a Mets game and there were ALOT of Frum People there. I must have seen at least 100 of them
What about the fact that our tax dollars go to pay for public education, something which I cannot take advantage of.
Not exactly true in many cases
tax Dollars pay for some Special Ed in Yeshivas, they pay for Books in yeshivas, they pay for Computers in Yeshivas, they pay for busing to Yeshivas. Sometimes they even pay for pools or Gyms in Yeshivas
There is more as well
If you want to get rid of mice you hang up a picture of Rav KATZ
Its a generation thing
The older generation will not give up books, but younger people are more apt to use ebooks
Also there is a maximum of a lifetime of 5 years on welfare , there is not maximum for Food Stamps, Heap Section 8
I always assumed the rules were that to accept food stamps or welfare you have to be actively looking for work
The Rules for Food Stamps and Welfare are different.
You can get Food Stamps even when working its based on income.
Welfare has special rules like you cant own any property. Cant have a bank account and things like only 1 TV (I know Kollel people dont have a TV…But there are rules like that for household items)
What is the ‘Roach Rabbi”?
It IS LEGAL for people to buy a house and rent the house to their children and collect Section 8 as rent.
Just because something is legal, doesnt mean its right
Dovvshtein: Based on that taaina, perhaps one need not strive to learn as much Torah as Rav Scheinberg, unless he is a godol on Rav Scheinberg’s level.
Does that mean you should also wear 100 pairs of Tzizit?
This is just a guess on my part
Could it be that Rav Scheinberg told the boys it it was a Se’udas Hoda’ah for the “Yankees” in order to get them to come to this Seuda for whatever reason (Someetimes I know Godols have used “excuses” like this to prevent averiahs and engage people.)
he did not want to talk about it because he wasnt endorsing the game and didnt want to seem like he did , but didnt want to reveal his plan either
There is someone who goes to my Shul who is from Boston area. Around the time of the Super Bowl I brought up the game. he told me he wasnt a fan
He then told me most of the Rebbeim from Boston WERE sports fans AND they use it for Kiruv.
He said its alot easier to approach people for Kiruv using sports than it is with Chiddusim.
The Yankees havent won the world Series since 2009
I use Spelt Matzo, its easier on the digestive system
Animals that are carnevours are usually wilder animals. Dogs and Cats are domesticated versions of their wilder counterparts like Tigers or Wolves.
Animals that are in a petting zoo are of the tame variety and those animals are herbavous and calm. Animals that eat meat have to be wild otherwise they cannot catch they prey in the wild.
In Other words , You are unlikely to be feeding Nveliah to any animal in a petting zoo
On a thread last week I told the story of the 1st Belzer Rebbe who did not eat gebrocks while his mother did. They ate from the same plate of soup with his mother eating the kneidlach and he leaving them for her!
Did The Belzer rebbe’s mother follow his fathers custom?
The Knife that cut the bread
Klausenberg and Bobover are really the same group, they are both really from the Sanz Chassidic dynasty
The real name of them is
Sanz-Klausenberg
Sanz-Bobover
The Union Jack is very different than a christian cross.
Anyone who looked at both of them would never confuse them. They look nothing like each other
While not going through all those, The Swiss Flag cross doesnt look a thing like a christian cross
Either Bobover or Lubavich