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OP,
This needs to be emphasied and I hope you dont get discouraged, this website is YESHIVA world news, not Jewish world news meaning many of the posters (but not all) represent the more right wing elements in the jewish community. and you might be getting a slightly distored view, (Read some of the threads and you might get it) They are probably very nice and very sincere people in real life and mean well
I am not sure if you have ever seen an orhtodox jew in person and Id really recommend trying to see some and maybe this might shed some light on the differences.
To see a more modern orhthodox community you might try Cherry Hill, NJ but a better option might be Teaneck, NJ (Near NYC)
To see a Yeshivish jewish community Your best best would be Lakewood, NJ (Its exit 89 on the Garden State Parkway, about 50 miles south of NYC and maybe 50-60 miles east of Philly)
To see a Chassidic community your best bet would be to visit Borough park in Brooklyn and especially walk down 13th ave.
Finally do not consider you degree an impediment, there is nothing wrong with it, no matter what anyone else says. Plenty of people have degrees (including myself, although I dont have a professional degree, just a regular BA)
Chicken you might be able to find the brand Empire, in the NY area most regular supermarkets carry it so maybe they will carry it in your area especially since the plant is in PA.
Cheese also must be kosher, the biggest brand of kosher cheese is Millers, around here the regular supermarkets carry it, so maybe they will have it by you as well.
Hamburger will be tougher, its much harder to find kosher BEEF hamburger meat outside of a jewish butcher or supermarket (You might find Empire Chicken or Turkey burgers)
Salmon really isnt a problem and I wouldnt worry about that
Water , Seltzer, Coffee and half/half is probably ok as well. Flavored coffee might be a problem, but I wouldnt worry about it for now.
BigGolem: who gave you that name? That’s how reform judisam started. Everyone minding thier own business is not a yiddishe concept. If you see people do somthing they might not know that its not right you shouldn’t have to think its not politicaly correct if you make them aware.
I was reading a book contemporary Halachic issues and it was discussing a movie house in Netanya that was open on Shabbos.
The Ashkenazic Charedim protested every friday night for 33 weeks and a Shaila was asked of Rav Elyshiv who wholehardly endorsed it because it was Chilul Shabbos.
A Sefardic Rabbi , Rav Malca condemed the protests claiming that not only would it not stop people from going it would anger them against religion. The book commented that in Sefardic communities non-confrontational approach seems to be the norm and even if someone is not religous they respect , honor the Torah and Rabbanim and do not go to Reform or Conservative (This is in Israel not the US) and if you look at elections in Israel, The reason SHAS get as many votes as it does is not because of Charedi Sephardim, its because of non-relgious sefardim who vote for them. So their approach work at least in their communities.
Aurora, I have only been toa whole foods a few times in my life (I wanted to see what it was like), I used to car pool with this asian woman who used to call Whole Foods, Whole paycheck and when I visited whole foods I found the prices to be very high.
There isnt a whole foods convient to me so I rarely go there anyway.
However from what I did see, most items did not seem to be kosher anway, the meat for sure not. I cant help you get Kosher Meat, but Empire branded Chicken might be available to you at your local supermarket.
Pareve means something not dairy or Meat like an Apple or a Fish
And Passover has special kosher laws so O-U pareve passover means something that is kosher for Passover that can be eaten with Dairy or Meat
The Manischewitz is Kosher. The O-U stands for the Orthodox Union, Other common symbols you might see are A K in a circle O-K , A K in a star The Star K and the hebrew letter Kof which looks like a backward C with the K in the middle (A Kof-K)
About the Dunkin Donuts, There is a idea of “Jewish Milk” or Chalov Yisroel, It is milk that was milked by a Jew , bottled by a jew etc. It used to be before Pasterazation things like Pigs Milk were used to keep milk fresh (Pigs Milk isnt kosher) About 50-60 years ago (I am not sure when exactly) a major Rabbi in the US Rabbi Moshe Feinstein rules that in the US Milk is from a cow and cannot be from a Pig because the government enforced the laws about Milk and most milking is done by machines anyway that only fit a cows udder and not a Pigs udder.
Many more Charedi groups did not accept this and stick to the Kosher Milk only.
IMO and most people who deal with Kiruv issues, They would not recommend you take up this stringency unless you are ready or want to. It is perfect OK and Kosher to Eat Breyers or Eddys Ice Cream and the Milk you buy in the supermarket.
The Dunkin Donuts thread was about the Kosher Milk, It is likely that the Dunkin Donuts nearest to you is NOT Kosher though, most are not, only a few in NYC and Baltimore areas are Kosher to my knowledge
There was a Tornado in NYC a couple of years ago
Most shuls have the prayers after midnight, there are a few that have as early at 10pm.
As far as women go, in the more Modern Orthodox shuls, women usually do attend and many times the Shuls have a larger program before the Selichot prayers.
In the more Charedi communities I dont think women attend
Look at the average salary of a Chassidic Jews vs Average Salary of a Yeshivish jew vs the average salary of a MO Jew many who have college degrees and advanced degrees.
Yes the Chassidim work, but they dont usually work (Unless its Diamonds) in High paying jobs that are needed to support a Frum Lifestyle . IE 10 Yeshiva Tuitions, Kosher Food costs more, Cost of Living in Jewish Neighborhoods cost more
The article is good reading and many a person in Chinuch SHOULD read it.
SOME OTD’s are caused by incorrect stuff taught in Chinuch, When someone finds out some things are incorrect, they begin to question other things as well
WOW, I saw you post about too much learning.
I was in the book store this week and I saw a book about “Complicated” Chinuch Questions and I was shocked about the “questions” that were in the book. The questions were like, My Son likes to watch Sports, how do I stop it. My daughter came out from Camp with Goyish songs on her iPod.
I did NOT see any topics about , My Kid is learning too much, My Kid doesnt know anything about secular topics.
My kids Rebbe hit my kid and now my kid is scared to go to school and REAL problems, not made up ones (or minor ones anyway)
When I was ready to go to college, I got tons of catalogs from Colleges asking me to apply and to visit. Even the places I did visit made an effort to encourage me to enroll. It was a buyers market.
In Chinuch it seems its a SELLERS market. The school makes the demands and kids and parents fall in line if they like it or not for fear of a ‘bad Shidduch” or “Being Kicked out”. People are unwilling to question the R’Y for fear of “Kavod” no matter how badly the school is run
It would be better of course for you to call before shabbos, but in my general experience in life an in-person meeting is taken alot more seriously than a phone call.
And yushke rising from the dead is more believable that Smith?
Its just as beliveable as the valley of the Dry Bones (Not to compare the 2, but it is the dead rising and its possible they took the story from the Valley of the Dry Bones)
Maybe you can call the Carlebach Shul in NY and ask if there is a similar service in the Philly area.
I think you would enjoy it.
Many people have families kids etc and need a faster service as the kids and even adults get figety.
OP
You mentioned that you would have to drive to an orthodox shul. While others discouraged it, I do not think they are correct on this.
I have occasionally when Ive been out of time been to chabad houses where the Rabbi knew very well that certain people who regulally came drove to the shul and I have definatly heard that some Big Rabbis have permitted driving to shul at least at the very begining especially in your case where you might not know anyone at the Shul.
Going to the Shul on Shabbos and introducing yourself to the Rabbi might be your best first step, (In person introductions are much better than on the phone) Perhaps he can help you with further Shabbos until you are able to move.
Generally meditation is not really a jewish thing,
I realize you are not in NYC, but you probably need to come visit, The Carlbach Shul might have some meditation.
You might also like the services there as well. There is alot of singing and Cantorology there as well. You also might find some people like yourself (Age and profession) both men and women.
In Ultra-Orthodox shuls there isnt much singing anymore and even more modern shuls there is alot less of it as well. Nowadays when there is a rare cantor, you usually hear groans in the audience that prayers will take longer because there is a Cantor.
One is not allowed to veer from the Torah Left or RIGHT. In the 1800’s many felt minor changes needed to be made and eventually reform was started. People seem very willing to critize changes on the left.
However changes on the right can be just as damaging. People who make such “changes” on the right must be called out just as vigorously to prevent damage
I saw an article about this in Haaretz so Im fairly certain this was said and done in France
Unless one follows every Shita of Rav Shteinmann, you do not have to follow this, there are plenty of Gedolim who feel otherwise Like Rav Shecter
Anything that can go wrong , will
Calculus was basically invented in the 1500’s by Issac Newton and Liebnetz who combined all ideas previously known into one discipline
Actually if you had done a basic research on this, this is the real story
He said this in France because in France the government pays religious schools tutions but you must teach a curriculum imposed by the government.
His statement was in response to the curriculum imposed by the French Government (You can teach Torah topics, but you much teach the imposed curriculum)
Mathematics is such Apikorsis
I am not 100% but if think if you are DRAFTED and you are forced to go into the army against your will you are considered ONASS because you dont control your circumstances.
One can speak english with a “jewish accent” and I dont mean yeshivish either. If you are so concened about seperate jewish speech, you can speak with this accent. I do not have this accent, but many family members do.
I suppose you can speak Spanish, Hebrew , French etc with a similar accent, You can easily communicate with others and still keep your jewish identity.
English is the language of the world, Since I was born in the US I am biased toward English even though I can speak Spanish and Hebrew.
Yiddish is the language of the Ghetto and sounds like German and I dont care to speak like a German and all they have done.
Actually what many times happens when you refuse orders is others are forced to be punished for your sins especially in Basic Training. (It is supposed to encourage comradery in the unit) so if you refuse to be Mechalel Shabbos in the Army, someone else might be forced to do 100 push-ups as punishment for your insubordination.
If the yiddish childrens books are as good as the english jewish books (Childrens or Adults) you want to stay far far away from them
Aurora,
If you really want to learn Yiddish, While others might not like it, The best places to learn it are the YIVO institute (on 16th St in Manhattan) and the Folksbien which is a organization dedicated to the Yiddish theater and culture. I do belive that the YIVO gives yiddish language courses, but otherwise some universites in the NYC area also give them.
These organizations are not really interested in the religious aspect of Yiddish, just in the preservation of the language and culture.But I have heard people from the Folksbien speak yiddish with the proper accent exactly as my grandmothers spoke it.
You probably would be more interested in reading the works of Shalom Alechim (Tevye the Milkman (Fiddler on the Roof)) , Issacs Bashevets Singer (Yentel). Perhaps you could read Tevye the Milkman in both Yiddish and English and get a good idea of the words, If you have a knack for Languages you should be able to pick it up that way. A True Torah book might not be the best way to learn as many are intricate and complicated and you might need to know much more backround to really get it without being bored.
Be advised that many secular Yiddishists tried to change the Yiddish alphabet from Hebraic to Latin. So you might want to take some Hebrew courses to learn the proper Hebrew Alphabet and then get the yiddish sounding equivilant (It is similar although not exact)
I dont think The Gadol Hador Rav Ovadia Yosef speaks anything but hebrew (He might speak and understand yiddish, but he doesnt speak it in publc)
Actually the anti-Frum Bundists pushed yiddish.
The Bundists were much more popular and followed than Zionists in the years before WW II
Its funny those who claim Hebrew isnt holy and Yiddish is holy seem to forget the most well known Yiddish word is actually Nivel Peh.
Very few people would know the Nivel Peh words in Hebrew yet everyone knows them in “holy yiddish”
I dont think the OP understands that for many Hebrew is the jewish Language of today and not Yiddish.
To the OP
For the most part the debate between Yiddish and Hebrew is about Zionism (not entirly, but a great deal)
Those who are more zionistic will lean more and more towards Hebrew and those who are less zionistic and anti-zionsitic will lean towards Yiddish
Also Yiddish is an Ashkenazic Language spoken by Jewish from Eastern Europe. Sephardic Jews , Jews from elsewhere did have their own language called Ladino (A Spanish Hebrew hybrid) but that has been mostly lost and they have adpoted Hebrew as their language
Yiddish is NOT the international Language of the Jew. It is Germanic and originally only spoken by Ashkenazic Jews . It was not spoke by Sephardim and most Sephardic Gedolim today like Rav Harari speak Hebrew
Yiddish today is not real Yiddish, Its Yinglish
I was in Paris and I met someone in a store who did not speak English and I did not speak French. Turns out we both spoke Hebrew and had a nice conversation. (He was likely Sephardic as most jews in France are nowdays)
I was in Barcelona and someone came up to me and wanted information about the park. They did not speak English or Spanish and I could not help them. I then heard them speak Hebrew and I was able to answer all their questions and they had a real smile on their face and almost felt at home.
Dont waste you time with Yiddish, If you want to learn a jewish language learn Hebrew.
Only Charedi Jews speak Yiddish anymore , most jews do not speak it. Even my mother who spoke Yiddish first hasnt spoken it in years (Her family was from Europe and they spoke Yiddish in the House)
TLIK
The problem is you arent the only one in that situation, almost everyone is. Someone told me that in her class she was the only one whose father “worked” (He only works part time) the rest of the girls all had fathers who were in Chinunch. Add to the fact that most frum families are large.
What is the person behind the desk supposed to do, What are the adminstrators supposed to do especially when almost nobody can afford and everyone has the same story.
In NYC area there are about 300,000 kids in Yeshivas, Bais Yaakov , Day Schools etc. Lets assume that each school has a $1000 deficit per kid, that means that $300,000,000 needs to be raised from Gevirim
Maybe Sheldon Adelman could stop spending $100 Million to defeat Obama and give it to Chinuch, but very few people have that kind of money
You are making an assumption that if you have 30 kids in a class who are paying and you add 1 non-payer it doesnt cost anything more to educate them. Unfortuantly thats not true, It does cost more to educate the non-payer.
In a perfect world all Kids should get the proper education, but the world is not perfect .
There are organizations that raise money for tuition, Kars-4-Kids / Oorah, but how much do you really think that raises and thats likely the biggest one. it probably raises a few million, but the shortfall is much much greater than that.
And most Gviers who give big money expect bigger control over the money. They just dont write a check for $5 Million dollars without conditions. They want to make sure they money is well spent
Its just funny how some get all bent out of shape on Spanish and then praise Yiddish.
Politicians visit many jewish areas for votes and if they want some of the Latino vote as well, they need to speak a little spanish to them.
This is an English speaking country. If you want to speak Spanish go back to Mexico.
Would you like to subsitute Yiddish for Spanish in that statement ?
And whats wrong with speaking Spanish, I can Speak Spanish somewhat (Not as well as english though)
There is no official language of the US
the government does NOT pay utilities of Catholic Schools or other private schools.
HEAP is for individuals not Schools , the government doesnt care about schools or religious institutions
You can quote any psak din you want, Con Ed doesnt care . Psak Dins dont raise money
You can live in the real world , or live in a fantasy world
If you want to ask people to Give and try to raise the Tens of Millions needed, I am all for that, but it isnt going to work, You arent going to raise it.
Thank goodness I dont run a yeshiva, I would not want to be in the situation where Id have to decide who to pay, the Rebbe who hasnt been paid in a month or Con Ed who is threatening to shut off the Power or the Bank who is threatening foreclosure.
And be Honest How many people would donate to a yeshiva whose Hashgafa they feel are “Anti-Torah” values (Whatever that means)
many MO schools are Mixed Gender, Would you Donate to those schools?
Many more Charedi Schools dont teach secular subjects, How many MO people find that abhorrent.
I didnt complain about the Plaques. I have no problem with that. It was someone else
If you want to give $100,000 to a yeshiva and you want a Plaque Gezan D’Heh
I am not cluelest. I am a realist. I dont live in a Fantasy world
GAW
You have to face the reality of the situation, You can either live in a fantasy world, or you can accept reality.
Do you really think no matter how many times it says dont boot kid, that a Satmar Gvier would give to a Zionistic MO school or Vice Versa
Contrary to most, I do think yeshivas need to kick out kids who dont pay, While its cruel, What are they really supposed to do unless they can raise the shortfall.
maybe the Rebbes dont mind being paid occasionally, But what about Con Ed….They could care less about your situation, You dont pay they will turn off the electricity and the Heat
What about the Mortgage, they will forclose, they dont care kids parents are unemployed.
And even what about the Rebbes themselves, they have their own bills that must be paid they need their salaries
And for those who say the Gevirim should pay, Should a Satmar Gevir pay for a MO yeshiva who are firm belivers in Zionism or should a MO Gevir pay for a Satmar yeshiva who are Anti-Zionist etc
If you really want the tution crisis resolved. You need different thinking and Im not sure the ideas would be popular or work.
You need to look at the american university systems and the Catholic Schools.
An endowment must be created and Im not sure people would want to give to an endowment.
Yeshivas must be run more as business rather than a labor of love, Neoptism must be stopped and the best qualified teachers should be hired.
Yeshivas in many cases are run as a fiefdom rather than by a board of directors. Many times its the RY way or the highway even if it is really wrong and can severly damage the finances of the yeshivas.
Constructive critism which might very well help the finances the yeshivas are quashed or not given for “Kavod Harav”
I am not 100% sure if MorahRach is a mandatory reporter against her neighbor unless she was a teacher of one of the kids.
While there might not be a legal imperitive to report, there certainly is a moral imperitive to report.
People are generally willing to sponsor such things as “A Day of learning” or buying new Seforim
But its almost impossible to get people to sponsor such things as the Electric or Heating Bill.
And its might not be an issue of trust, but rather how to run things. If there is a shortage of money one year an Askin might say that the yeshiva has to lay off a Rebbe so the others can be paid and the yeshiva stay open, but the R’Y might not go for that idea and even hire someone who needs a job even though he cant pay the salaries he already has.
Let them repent somewhere else
I dont want an abuser living anywhere near me or my kids.
Being an abuser is a sickness, you can never really cure yourself.
Its more understandable than you think.. Todays Yiddish is more Yinglish, but if there is any issue, Mom always knows best especially if she spoke yiddish as a first language