youhavegottobekiddingme

@Englishman: “You don’t elicit much empathy when crying all about your vacation, recreation, hanging out, and traveling expenses.”

Wow. Have you given any consideration to the proportion of ‘hanging out’ to the proportion of the other expenses mentioned? Read that post one more time. How likely is it for a girl who carefully and personally sets aside for those practical expenses (insurances etc) and a decent savings to also go on numerous extravagent vacations?

Eating out at a pizza place once in a blue moon to catch up with friends is hardly considered extravagant. Nor is it a contradiction for someone who is careful with her money, to deem her friends important enough to spend time with them. Or to leave town for a few days once a year to unwind. I’m not referring to luxurious cruises, or trips around the world. (Though for some, it might be what they need.)

If you, or your son were to go out with a girl who was single for 10 years, would you wonder how she spends her free time? If you asked her and she responded “I need to save for retirement”. What would you think? No seriously, if a girl told you that she NEVER gets together with her friends over dinner, or NEVER leaves town because she is afraid of wasting away her savings. She has never spent any money on any recreational activity. Not paddle boating on Chol hamoed, or hiking through a trail (insert whatever minor/relatively inexpensive activity or hobby you’d like). Would that concern you?

If it doesn’t, I’m worried for her, and I’m worried for you.

And who says I’m “crying” over my expenses? I believe I said that I happily pay those expenses. I’m grateful that I have insurance. Grateful that I have a job. Grateful that I have friends to spend time with. Grateful that my parents encourage me to be responsible and take care of all of these things so that I’ll know how to build a home, b’ezras Hashem. But you need to understand that believing that single girls have no expenses is erroneous.

@of course: thank you for understanding the emotional component here. I know many girls who do just that – and responsibly.They know what they need to keep their spirits up. They are keeping themselves emotionally healthy, within limits. When I read the ad, i didn’t have a need to go on a spending spree – though I see why some might. It aint easy at this stage. For anyone, male or female. You just gotta take a deep breath, daven, and keep on plugging.

@My Logic: I wasn’t offended at all, though I apologize if I came across that way. I was just trying to shed light on a perspective that many people seem to be oblivious too.