Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
The primary point from Rav Shach, that he was conveying to the girls with his response, is that family matters are more important for a girl than mastering Tanach and meforshim.
That is also the lesson intended to be conveyed when people retell this story.
lilmod, I’d consider it a problem if she didn’t know how to bake and instead of taking baking lessons she, instead, focused on mastering the Ramban.
Alrighty, but none of those details change the gist of the story as I presented it.
Good point, apy. Rav Shach said it’s more important for a girl to be able to make a potato kugel than to learn a Rambam.
Torah Tape #24
Question: In the story where Yoshiyahu Hamelech did not allow Paroh Necheh to pass through Eretz Yisroel and as a result, it led to his death, what wrong did Yoshiyahu commit by not consulting Yirmiyahu, if he used his own judgment to make his decision?
Thanks, Meno. Are you available to serve as my spokesman? 😉
Why do I get blamed for everything? Are the tornadoes here my fault too?
Someone with bad middos, by definition, is not a talmid chochom. Regardless of how book smart he is or how much Gemorah he knows.
My point is if someone doesn’t have good middos you know right away he’s not a talmid chochom. So when Chazal tell us to marry our daughters to a talmid chochom, it means obviously pay attention to the potential suitors middos. It goes together.
So when saying marry a talmid chochom should be the priority, it means make sure he has good middos together with his chochma.
A proper Jewish reaction takes precedence over rights granted under the Bill of Rights.
Chazal say marrying a talmid chochom is the most important attribute. Being a talmid chochom requires good middos.
We’re in golus. Lay low. Don’t antagonize government officials.
(P.S. to the Zionists. Israel is also in golus.)
lilmod, can you clarify about your differentiation regarding NY/NJ on the topic under discussion?
Person1: Why do you assume they don’t teach this in the seminaries? Most do.
My response is customized for the audience and conversation. Charlie equalized the guest wife helping in the kitchen with the guest “husbands” helping in the kitchen. His intention was egalitarianism (as he makes clear in his voluminous posting history). That is anathema to Jewish values.
I disagree with him as it pertains to myself.
lilmod, after that explanation, why your differentiation on this point for NY/NJ?
Also, if the guy is in Kollel and him travelling will result in Bitul Torah that could be alleviated if she came to his town, would you be more amenable to her travelling rather than him? (I would.)
5,000 years of history and traditional roles of men and women.
Tashlich is different. In all the places I know the people only go to tashlich in a place where there is no swimming. There are many such available places in NYC, being NYC is situated on three different islands.
Even if dressed tzniusly, there would be a problem with being in public in wet clothing. Also, isn’t there a safety concern when there’s no lifeguard?
Why would it be a chiddush whatever happened to be the outcome? It could have been any outcome, and whatever it happened to be was random to those particular players.
Don’t worry lilmod, I also plan to disregard his warnings and read his women-focused book too. 😉
I don’t know whether in Israel there are certain places they have security to keep out one gender, but in the U.S. there are no such public beaches. To assume that during certain times when it is not busy it might be okay to go is highly problematic because there is nothing to prevent anyone else from suddenly appearing at the beach. That unexpected visitor could be a woman dressed pritzusdik, thus causing aveiras to any men there at the time, or a man who will see any frum women there who weren’t expecting that visitor.
The kitchen is the wife’s quarters and job.
Pritzus.
Abba, the new law requires NJ to pay the yeshivas the full maximum allotment per student qualified for mandatory transpiration. It will cost the yeshivas less than the full amount to actually transport them. It cost less even when the government was paying the bus companies directly. The yeshivas will be able to save even more and use the extra (saved) money to pay for the non-mandatory students.
lilmod, why’d you ignore his warnings not to read his men’s book? 😉
Many rabbononim disagree with R. Arush’s marriage advice.
Also, Rambam and the halacha specifically state the husband should take his wife to beis din if she fails to perform her various marital obligations for him.
Meno, the Ashkenazi poskim pasken no differently.
lilmod, why are you of the opinion that it is “inappropriate” for the guy to expect the girl to travel to his city for the date? What makes the reverse more appropriate and what “bad precedent” is established otherwise? And why does NY/NJ change in this regard, per your opinion?
Happygirl, what are the ages in your circles?
Which act shows emotional availability and which act shows emotional unavailability, on a first date?
I’d end homelessness and the common cold.
TRUEBT, How, on a first date, do you determine if he or she is “emotionally unavailable”? Specifically.
Is this another Zionist screed?
By the Chasidish, 22 and older.
By the Litvish, 25 and older.
By the MO, 26 and older.
In Eretz Yisroel the standard is that the dating couple meet at the site they’re going to.
The new law the NJ State legislature passed revising the payment module for Yeshiva/private school bussing is an unambiguous victory for the frum community. The bottom line is that it has a net result in providing State funding for private school bussing.
So much for the naysayers here (zd and company) who kept parroting that the State would never acquiesce to additional State funding for private school transportation.
They did.
What is a basic phone?
Sparkly, Torah education, that is.
Ben Ish Chai (Torah Lishma 319):
Question: Is a wife obligated to listen to her husband when he orders her to do ridiculous things? For example, does she have to listen when her husband demands with threats that she should ride on a broomstick in the courtyard like little children do or to bray like a donkey or bark like dog? She refused because of embarrassment. Does she in fact have an obligation to listen to her husband even for foolish things because a woman is obligated to honor her husband and to do what he wants because that is his happiness? Or do we say that she has no obligation to listen to foolish demands?
(Translation by Rav Eidensohn)
Person1, I didn’t say that. I said that the more secularly educated someone is, the more likely he is to be less yeshivish.
lilmod, there’s generally a trade-off to be made between seeking someone yeshivish and secularly educated. The more one is of one of those attributes, the more likely he’s to have less of the other.
Nu, so we should go back to the pre-resume days.
I wonder how people got married until shidduch resumes became popular about 12 or so years ago.
Seriously? You’re going to judge someone’s neshoma and personality based on his spelling and/or writing capabilities in the secular language?
CTL, AARP offers discounted flip phones with big numeric keypads…
So why your hypocrisy now? (To be clear, I ask out of benevolence, not malignity.)
I would accept the accuracy of RNE over RHS. 1) RNE has *not* retracted. A phone call to him can easily verify this. 2) It isn’t RNE’s position to retract, it is Rav Eliashev’s position. And he, too, never wavered in this position.
Cherry Coke or Pepsi Wild Cherry?
writersoul, MO folks generally have shidduch resumes? I though the rule of thumb there was they “meet naturally” rather than being introduced via a shadchan.