WolfishMusings

Have you heard the ancient adage about “fighting like cats and dogs”?

Yes, I have. Have you ever heard the adage “raining cats and dogs?”

The Wolf

I’ve seen quite a number of households where both dogs and cats are present. It is highly unlikely that the dog will spend all of its time (or really any of it) chasing the cat.

Stop getting your information about animal relationships from cartoons.

The Wolf

It’s hard to imagine that someone would think a test on Torah would be bittul Torah.

No it’s not.

When I was younger, someone tried to convince me that the time I spent preparing for Krias HaTorah was really bittul Torah since I could have spent that time learning far more complicated inyanim.

He hung his argument on the fact that the Shulchan Aruch says that we are m’vatel talmud torah for megillah laining. “But how,” he asked, “could you say that? Megillah itself is Torah, no?” He then answered that since we could be learning G’mara or other more complicated matters, the megillah reading was actually bittul Torah (albeit required).

No, I didn’t buy the argument then, nor do I now.

The Wolf

Which means that 166 million plus eligible voters did not.

By that argument, *no* US President is legitimate.

The Wolf

I gave my answer there and the same answer applies here.

The Wolf

Does simply answering this make you uneasy?: If someone redt an ethnic Nigerian guy with an Afro hair to date your daughter and at a later time someone else redt an ethnic European to date your daughter, all other things being equal, would you be more reluctant or slower to pass on the first shidduch proposals than the second?

It’s not difficult for me to answer. I told you what I’d do — I’d let my daughter decide.

You want me to answer the question of “If I wasn’t me, what would I do?” You’re asking me to answer as if I were a different person who belonged to a group that has a very different outlook on dating and marriage than I do. So, any answer I give along that way is meaningless, because it’s based on fiction rather than how I would react in real life.

That’s not good enough for you? Too bad. I’m not going to play your game of “if you were a racist, what would you do?” My answer stands — all other things being equal, I would let my daughter decide which one she wants to date. If it’s the white boy, so be it. If it’s the black boy, so be it.

The Wolf

Then flip a coin

Joseph’s response: Pretend every coin in the world has been destroyed. 🙂

Wolf: She won’t know how either looks until and unless she dates him. (There are no shidduch pictures as many families eschew them as inappropriate.) Many frum families use a traditional shidduch process where the parents do almost all of the legwork and the child will not date anyone not recommended by her parents. In the not distant past, for millenia, often the parents themselves would select a shidduch for their children with the child at most simply giving a yes or no when first meeting the mate. (And yes was the norm having reliance and trust in their parents.) Nowadays the paradigm has shifted but nevertheless in the frummer families the shidduch process is still parent-focused.

You asked how we would do things. I would never get involved in a shidduch situation like this for my kids. It’s something that is so alien to us that I couldn’t answer the question. I can’t imagine ever being so presumptuous as to tell my kids whom they can and cannot date, that they must do so without knowing anything about the perspective date (to the point where they cannot even see a picture) and where I would intentionally shut my son/daughter out of the process completely before the first date. To me, this whole scenario is just as absurd as the one I jokingly made at the top of this post (where every coin in the world is destroyed).

I told you what I would do in shidduchim. I’m not going to play along with your scenarios as they do not apply to me and my family, and I’m not going to presume to attempt to answer what I would do if I were in some bizarre alternate universe where I was so close-minded and controlling where I was, essentially, no longer me.

The Wolf

In a nutshell, other than the ethnicity both are equal and Bochor Two has no other advantages. Do you send your daughter on a date with Bochor One or do you wait to see if Bochor Two is shayach?

If the two are so truly equal that the only difference is their race, why should the parents care? Let the daughter go out with whichever one she wants.

(Yeah, I know… that’s a real radical idea)

The Wolf

Are you as opposed to mothers who look at a shidduch picture and reject the candidate

I’m opposed to the entire idea of mothers acting as gate-keepers for their sons and dictating whom their sons can date and whom they cannot. If they are mature enough to get married, they are certain mature enough to look at a picture and decide on their own whether or not they find the girl physically attractive.

The Wolf

Wolf: So it’s perfectly fair to tell the shadchan not to redt any black guys to you, correct?

I’m *definitely* not interested in black guys (or guys of any color) for a shidduch. 🙂

But to answer your question – the person who is requesting the shidduch has the right to place parameters on the persons sent to them, especially when it involves physical traits. Thus, yes, I believe they can ask for certain age ranges, heights, weights and, yes, races. If there is no attraction, then there is no reason to consider it.

However, the person will eventually have to answer to The One Above regarding whether they’re excluding people of other races on the basis of physical attraction or racism.

Parents (or anyone else, on the other hand) should have absolutely *zero* say regarding physical characteristics that their children can and should date.

The Wolf

If you think you know who I am, please feel free to come up and say hello. I’m a tame wolf. I don’t bite.

The Wolf

Could a Nazi style party ever rise to power in the US, thereby paving the way for another Holocaust C”V, and what is the likelihood of it happening?

Could it happen? Sure it could.

Will it happen? Probably not.

The Wolf

2) One should not cut their nails on Thursday,

as they will regrow on Shabbos.

At the risk of asking a silly question… they’ll grow on Shabbos if you cut them on Friday or any other day of the week. They don’t stop growing. So, can someone please explain this?

Secondly, even if they do grow on Shabbos, so what? It’s not a melacha — any more than it is for your hair to grow on Shabbos. So, what’s the issue?

If you’re going to tell me that it’s a kavod Shabbos issue (i.e. that they won’t be freshly trimmed for Shabbos), that I can understand. But I don’t get what the issue is with them growing *on* Shabbos (which they’re going to do no matter what day of the week you cut them on).

The Wolf

FWIW, my wife is only one inch shorter than me. Very happily married for almost a quarter-century.

The Wolf

Heh… I just saw this in today’s news concerning actress Shirley MacLaine:

[snip]

Sounds offensive, no? The people who perished in the Holocaust “had it coming to them” because of the sins of past lives according to Ms. MacLaine.

So, if it’s offensive when dealing with Holocaust victims, why is it acceptable when we’re talking about the autistic children, the blind, mamzeirim or the like?

The Wolf

Gilgul is from Toras Nistar. It wasn’t mentioned openly until after the Ramban.

It sounds to me like you might have just refuted the “Kuzari proof.”

The Wolf

In traffic court, you are guilty until proven innocent. They don’t follow the Constitution.

That only applies to criminal cases. In civil cases, the burden of proof is a preponderance of the evidence. This applies to all civil cases. For example, if I sue you for damages, I don’t have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you did it — I only need to prove that it’s more likely that you are responsible. The burden of proof is higher for criminal cases because there you have the potential to lose your liberty (or life). That does not exist in civil cases.

It is possible that federal income tax violates it too. Search the web for more info on that.

No, it’s not. Income taxes are authorized by the 16th Amendment to the Constitution and the Supreme Court (who are the final arbiters of what the Constitution says) have consistently shot down all the silly tax-protester arguments.

The Wolf

I am so sorry about your loss, Wolf.

Thank you.

The Wolf

Move them to Jordan and be done with it.

Considering the fact that Jordan doesn’t want them, how do you propose to do that?

The Wolf

Do you still make a ???? on pesachdig cookies, even after pesach?

Why would you think the b’racha changes based on whether it is Pesach or not?

The Wolf

My kids, however, have only Hebrew names. exclusively, and NO Jiddish names, as Jewish names by definition are taken from Tenach and Seforim and are in Loshon Kodesh = Hebrew names and no other foreign language.

Actually, in my case, that’s true. All of my kids’ names (except for one) is the name of someone in Tanach. The one exception is a Hebrew word found very commonly in Tanach (but isn’t actually someone’s name).

I preferred not to give Yiddish names, although, if my wife would have insisted, I wouldn’t have fought her over it (as long as there was also a Hebrew name). As it turns out, we agreed on the matter anyway.

The Wolf

Besides, if it ever turns out that they *need* an English name, for whatever reason, they can always change their names legally after they turn eighteen.

The Wolf

If the secretary answering the phone responds in the negative, how could you be certain you could rely on the accuracy of her response?

Because I’d be willing to bet that the person answering the public phone number on their website would have to be familiar with the exhibits as, no doubt, lots of people call about them.

And, if the person answering the phone is not sure, then by all means, ask to be passed on to someone who would know.

The Wolf

Sorry, mistake.

S’okay. 🙂

The Wolf

You might want to reflect on the fact that the word “To pray” (l’hispallel) is in the binyan hispael — reflexive.

The Wolf