TikkunHatzot

…I also saw my friend’s father, in her house, who had committed suicide. That was really freaky.

ME TOO!

What happened was that my friend’s father committed suicide & so I decided to rent out the room in their basement of their house so that I could also help out the family. To make a long story short, he was standing on my bed one night….and he wasn’t too happy either! I FREAKED OUT & was running all over the house! Keep in mind, that I was in the military at this time & I did NOT believe in ghosts at this time.

Either way, the next morning, I only explained what happened to the wife & she didn’t say anything. So, I went & got some mental help…I thought I was just going insane….HOWEVER, 3 days later, the wife “decided” to tell me that sometimes her husband (the man that was now deceased) comes onto her bed at night & she can actually feel the bed move & she could smell & hear him….by now, I was getting freaked out AGAIN.

THEN, she told me that he was known to come to the bedside of 1 of her 16 year-old daughters. Apparently, the 2 of them (him & this daughter) once had a very long conversation. I don’t remember all that the wife told me, but part of the conversation between him & the daughter was about him asking forgiveness from her for all of the wrong-doings that he did to her in his lifetime!!! Now, I was REEEAAAALLLY freaking out. Apparently, him & his daughter were now getting along better than when he was alive!

I could never again be alone in that house & I decided to move…and rather quickly.

Although, I walked away with many positive lessons from that point in my life.

My policy is that if the email is legitimate and is well meant, I will reply in some fashion.

…and how do you know if it is legitimate & well meant?

I’m just saying, the best scam e-mails are the ones that sound legitimate & well meant and the worst thing you can do is to reply to those.

I’m a doctor. Thats my policy.

I fail to see why someone would listen to a doctor for halachic & online advice.

I think the answer would have been simpler if you just asked your LOR.

A better question would be: “Why did Syria make such a big deal about Israeli’s killing 20 Syrian protestors, when Syria itself killed over 1,000 civilians?”

why not invite them? thats a big chillul Hashem, if only the Jews are invited.

Oh no, not another “CH” post.

Suburbans get around 13-17mpg…that’s actually quite pathetic in terms of mileage. Many smaller cars can get 3-4 times that & the smaller car would cost a lot less in repairs, tires & everything else.

Have you ever driven a Suburban before? I had one that I borrowed in Jersey & Maryland & it was a monster to park & drive. I really didn’t like that, but some people don’t mind it…but then again, they are also the people that double-park.

Is it true that it a ketuba also includes the misdeeds of a BT?

That might be good enough reason for most to not put it up on the wall!

I wanted to point out that MOST people here DO live in beds & under roofs (even the poorest of people). I wasn’t trying to scare anyone from moving here. Israel does have much in the way of Western Standards as well. It’s just some of us find it much cheaper/easier to get by without them.

@Ilovetheholyland. I actually have a few friends here that live/lived in caves in E”Y….and as a bonus, some of them actually look like cavemen too!

19)ilovetheholyland

alot of the so called luxuries that you have in america are non-entities in Eretz Yisrael. it may be hard to give up but once in israel you probably wont even realize that youre missing them. also everything there has a much higher elevation of ruchnius, and people there are not as focused on gashmius indulgance.

Very true.

Back in the US, I had a car, bed, privacy, extra pairs of shoes, my own bathroom, a big kitchen, air-conditioning & a roof over my head. These were considered “neccesities” that everyone expected to have. However, now I don’t have any of these & I don’t even miss them.

….however, the things I now notice that I’m lacking are things such as certain middos.

As a Shadchan I’m disgusted by the many guys who I see who reject most of the girls they date….Its hurtful for each of the girls they reject. Why should they inflict this pain endlessly?

So, why do you keep setting them up with dates if you know they are causing pain to other people?

Head down to Mizpe Ramon in the Negev on a moonless night and see a night sky the way it *SHOULD* be. With nothing above you but a sky full of stars.

Maybe I’ll try this.

since people in Israel work on Sunday instead of having the day off like here when can a person travel to different places to remind them and allow them to feel why they live there?I feel that with People working 5 days a week full time and im not talking about the husbands that work and the mothers that dont, both husband and wife work when do they get to relax and connect with Hashem by going to the kotel?

….lil B, you’re making things up.

IN AMERICA, I rarely saw anyone spend there day off in purely spiritual pursuits. Many times, people went to parks, malls, restaurants, etc. Rarely, did they go somewhere to pray & connect to H-shem.

IN ISRAEL, people DO travel despite working 6 days. Even fairly large families travel for Shabbos & Yom Tovim. It’s very possible. There are still many people camping out in tents within the old city & some parks in other neighborhoods, because they wanted to spend Shavuos at the Kotel. If a person REALLY wants to make something happen, then H-shem helps them.

Either way, from what I see here, a “full-time” work schedule (as well as the work ethic) isn’t really the same as America’s concept of the term.

@Lil B…I can sum up my answers with the statement “Everything happens for a reason”.

A lot of my choices that I made when I was younger, actually prepared me very well for my move.

I was in the military when I was younger, so I’m used to living in the middle east out of a backpack/suitcase…But if you make Aliyah through something like NBN, then you won’t have to do what I did.

My relatives (parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, etc.) is a lot different & more complex. It hurt. There is no way around it. It hurt. (Even though my relationships also are a little more complex halachically)

but i heard time and time again how its not easy to live there.

Yes, I’ve read that 10 out of 12 people said that…it must’ve been in the Shelach Times or something.

But seriously, if a person is wanting to live & raise their family according to Torah, then there is not enough GOOD things to say about Israel.

Is it “hard” to walk up & down the winding staircases in the old city? I don’t know, is it “easy” in America to find a bus that’ll take you pray at the Machpelah Cave & Kever Yishai V’Ruth for less than $7, and still be back in time for dinner?

Is it “hard” in Israel to put up with the Palestinians & they’re constant provoking behavior? I don’t know, is it “easy” in America to walk to the Kotel to daven & say Tehillim to H-shem?

When people say that living here is hard, ask why they don’t also mention about how it’s also INCREDIBLY EASY to do many ENORMOUSLY spiritual things here as well.

Pork is also enjoyable…

In fact, once when asked what he misses most since he became a BT, the response was pork.

I think pork itself is disgusting…but bacon is a different story.

Either way, I remember that Rabbi Akiva Tatz says there is a kosher way to fulfill all non-kosher cravings. Such as by preparing the udder of a cow correctly, one could make it taste like meat mixed with dairy.

Either way, I’ve compiled a small list from my own experience:

-Kosher Bacos are very similar in taste to (although not as juicy as) bacon.

-Basic ham tastes like licking your sweaty arm on a hot day (just not as salty or hairy)

-Lobster really doesn’t have any taste (that’s why people dip it into sauce).

-Crawfish tastes like mud…same with most (but not all) catfish.

-Imitation crab (made from fish) actually tastes better than the real flavor of crab, but people just like to break the shell of the crab & that’s what’s fun about eating it; same thing with lobster)

-Some pickled “whole” Okra tastes & has the same texture as shrimp.

-Turtle & rabbit taste just like chicken.

-Drywall & cardboard tastes just like matzah…sorry, but it’s true.

It’s a riddle. Read it again & you’ll see that the most distinguishing features in the males are their careers & not their middos.

The OP is actually praising this woman, since he is mentioning how she held out despite how appealing these men are.

I live in Yerushalayim as well….(and currently looking for a place for Shavuot)…

Why waste as much water washing a cup that you would be drinking from it? To me, it seems wasteful to do.

I can understand that it’s not refined drinking out of a HUGE 1-gallon container, but the smaller bottle of water & coke cans are meant to be drinking straight from the bottle/can.

I remember learning in halacha that a Ger disowns his pre-conversion family. That he may no longer maintain contact with them and they are no longer considered his parents/family.

That’s probably something you read, but it’s not what a rabbi will probably say.

I’m not a rabbi, so I’m not going to paskun, but I’ve been told by my rabbi & shown the source(which I forgot now), that while a ger isn’t considered a part of his old family, he still doesn’t have to mention that or break contact with them. This was a decision made with something to do with inheritance issues. Just ask a rabbi to explain it.

Tikun, Baruch Habah to Klal Yisrael. May your conversion go smoothly.

I forgot to say “thank you. Thank you.

Wow, thanks Tikkun. BTW, why did you choose this SN?

What’s SN?

To those who did make the decision, was it an intellectual discovery, or an inner feeling, or a deeper pull based on both or more?

All of the above. While xtianity isn’t based on (any) logic, logic was something that drew me to Judaism. But it was also an inner feeling/connectedness that I had when I was around the Jewish people. And it was also a “vow” that I made to G-d to follow the path of truth, wherever that path may lead.

I am always awed at Baalei Teshuva and their stories, I can only hope to reach their level

I always hear frum people say something like that. But I always hear BT/Gers say the same thing about FFBs. There are benefits that FFBs have that others don’t. Some things are big, but there are many small things that you would never have thought of that benefit FFBs.

After I wrote what I wrote, I watched a very secular Israeli making sure that he remembered to kiss a mezuza as he walked through a doorway…and Bernie Madoff may have done 1 severe thing wrong, but I am sure that if someone knew him as a neighbor, friend or aquintance that they would have good things to say about him.

You should write books. Can you tell us more? How did your families react? Are you well accepted?

Yes, I keep notes so that, G-d willing I can write a book, since so many people find it fascinating.

My parents don’t mind, since I am improving my middos. However, the xtians that are elsewhere in my family are soooo opposed to it that I had to cut off contact from most of them years ago.

Being accepted hasn’t been an issue (but it doesn’t mean that I don’t have to work hard at it or haven’t had to put up with uncomfortable situations, though). While I am not finished with my conversion, it doesn’t seem to bother even the ultra-orthodox from treating me with much respect. In fact, a few years ago I ate a Purim meal at my friends house in Mea Shearim & the family made me feel like I was a long-lost family member.

I hate to say this, but if my introduction to torah jewery was the yeshiva world coffee room, I would run the opposite way. The invective routinely directed towards others is horrible.

I think I’ve seen much worse in my introduction & it didn’t really stop me & the truth is that it only stops people looking for an excuse to turn away. What I mean is that if a person is focused on getting closer to G-d, then they aren’t going to let people stand in their way.

I believe that he who forgets that he was megayer and not a BT, is the one who succeeded….Besides, we’re all BTs in a way

Can you clarify this? I have been told that a ger is a BT…or maybe they are “like” a BT…but I’m confused as to how this is so. But maybe I am confused.

I don’t see myself as having done anything special, I just corrected something that went wrong at some point in history. It’s no big deal for me and personally

I really don’t see anything special about my story either. However, I came to the conclusion that at certain times, it’s good to tell, since many Jews have told me that they have gained much inspiration from my story. How? I don’t know.

I’ve also always wondered if the coincidence of me finding & appreciating Judaism may have been a tikkun of sorts for my ancestors that didn’t appreciate it & decide to walk away from it.

Personally, my great grandparents, for whatever reason, decided to “convert” to the Church of England (but I didn’t find this out until I got interested in Judaism at age 24). BTW, this story is somewhat similar for most gerim that I’ve met.

My parents weren’t religious, they sent me to a Christian school my whole life. At 16, I became a very religious Christian.

Fast forward a few years, I was working for & living with a SECULAR Jewish family, and I was a RELIGIOUS Christian. The fact they were secular & I was religious is important, because when I lived them, I said to myself “Why would anyone want to convert them? They still have higer moral standards than anyone at church”….I actually saw that if they converted they would be moving backwards in their moral character….and when I told my Christian friends this, well, let’s just say that it started my descent out of the church.

Either way, the boss & his wife left a big impression on me & I started to ask questions about Judaism. It started off slow, but I eventually decided to leave Christianity & embrace Judaism.

However, for various reasons in my family history, I am not halachically considered Jewish. So I have to convert. I’ve actually been in the process for 4 years THIS WEEK. I would have been “done” with it 2 years ago, but in the past few years America has been caught up in many invalid conversions, which made it much harder & much less stable for me.

And since it became much less stable, as far as if my eventual conversion in America would even be accepted in Israel, I chose just to move to Israel & convert here under the supervision of the rabbi(s) that are setting the standards for conversions. That way there wouldn’t be any problems in the future.

…and since I’m converting haredi, I don’t know how much longer I’ll be a part of the CR…or be on the internet at all.

Either way, my rabbi in America is a baal teshuva & went through a different situation; he actually didn’t look up to religious Jews. So when secular Jews tell him that they don’t like the way the frum Jews act, he half-jokingly says that he became more Jewish (read: “religious”) despite the Jewish people & their behavior.

Either way of what you decide to do, please keep us informed.

Do they not realize that their public displays serve to legitimize the actions of anti-semites to harm ALL Jews?

I have yet to meet a Jew that realizes this….

Not ALL the rabbis — some gedolim were Zionists

I think I know what you’re getting at, but I don’t have time to look into it before Shabbos begins. But you mean like Rav Kook,etc, right?

Are we talking about the same thing here though? For instance, the rabbis were not against Jews making aliyah & small groups of Jews always have been making aliyah for the past 2,000 years. They were all for that. But the rabbis were against the massive “wall” of Jews making an “Aliyah”, since they knew that it would disrupt the inhabitants of the land…which as we see it did.

Theirs is a valid Jewish position and some of what they say needs to be heard.Problem is, it does not need to be heard outside the Jewish community.

600kilobear, I’m like you. I don’t believe that the outside world should know all of Jewish affairs, but I really wish that they would at least see that some of these groups actually make more sense than people give them credit for.

I’m not for the Neturei Karta, but most people don’t give them the credit that they do have some very good points (but they are about 90 years too late in trying to enfore them), since the rabbis in the 1920’s & 30’s were very opposed to the State of Israel. In fact, when I studied the history of the 1st & 2nd Aliyah, I was amazed at how opposed the rabbis were to the whole situation.