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strivingMember
thanks….
strivingMemberchatty – yeah… i just can’t think that my friends would say anything not nice about me… is that super naive?
strivingMember“It looks like your some nut that has a few friends that are willing to go brainwash your prospective mother in law… “
they’re actually really close with the family… I know. hindsight is 20/20… i’m really not so socially off… just inexperienced with the shidduch world… 🙁
strivingMemberso it’s not really logical to think that i missed my bashert by making a naive mistake – right?
strivingMemberluv2hack— oh my gosh. that’s pretty scary. i guess i though that kind of think only happens in People Speak… hmm. I just don’t want to start doubting and mistrusting all of my friends…
so would you say that single friends shouldn’t be references?
strivingMemberAnyone?
strivingMembermordechai literally sounds like country yossi… is he?
strivingMemberbigsaaan seresssh bring me a glass of water at once!
funny – bigsan and seresh’s language: “a binga binga boonga”
lol about the salami bologna thing – my whole childhood i tried to figure out what in the world they were saying!
strivingMemberoomis1105- you said everything i was thinking.
i mean the number one rule of dating is: Don’t think that the person will change for you. Religiously, personality-wise, and in terms of addictions, too. i’m not saying that it doesn’t happen, but it’s not as common as the people in this forum seem to think.
strivingMemberNobody: thanks for your words of chizuk!
areivimzehlazeh: thanks SO much for the illustration of the “G-d-in-your-life-all-day” thing!
I was just talking to my friend who said that in the Alay Shor, it says that the way to “cure” a spiritual low is to “wait it out.” Maybe it depends on what triggered the spiritual low… right?
strivingMemberAOB– thanks for the clarification! 🙂
strivingMemberD
strivingMemberS
strivingMemberR
strivingMemberclaustrophobic 🙂
strivingMemberL
strivingMemberfeivel– i read the garden of emunah. it is very good. but if seems kind of extreme…
I.M. here: about feeling good when you do chessed, it’s natural! There’s no such thing as really doing a purely selfess thing— even if it’s helping someone else- your gain is feeling good about yourself!
shaatra: can you be a bit more specific about the telling-Hashem-I-love-Him thing?
all of you: i can’t say enough how much it means to me that you’re all putting so much thought into your answers/advice. it shows be how much Jewish people really care about eachother- even anonymously! Thanks!
strivingMemberthanks!
feivel: i love the chessed idea— helping others DOES boost my spiritual mood.
Jewess: I’m gonna try the Ani Maamin idea— sounds great!
strivingMemberkapusta:
1) For me, in a spiritual low, it’s extra hard to daven so much so I don’t think that’s gonna work for me
2) Looking at other people’s misfortune would probably help if I just in a low mood— but it doesn’t really boost me spiritually.
Thanks for the thought that you put in to answering me. 😉 It is sincerely appreciated.
strivingMemberL
strivingMemberaussieboy: i totally don’t. that’s what makes it so funny…
strivingMemberlol this whole misunderstanding what the habit is cracks me up!
strivingMemberhey.
i’m gonna borrow your example. if you know that whenever you see cookies you’ll grab them and eat them even though you resolved in your heart to never eat another cookie, then the best thing to do is to distance yourself from anywhere that cookies might pop up. as much as you prep yourself logically, when that plate of cookies shows up on the kitchen table, it’s hard to resist.
therefore, as much as possible you should try to remove yourself from the circumstances in which your habit-triggers may show up.
i wish i could take this advice too… i think that everyone has “bad habits” that must be conquered…
good luck!
February 26, 2009 6:53 am at 6:53 am in reply to: Seminary / Yeshiva in Israel – Economic Crisis #639056strivingMember“What conceivable Torah benefit is there to send a girl to seminary in Israel?”
Granted, the year in Israel isn’t for everyone, but for many girls it is a life-changing year and reaps beautiful Torah benefits and rewards.
Eretz Yisroel is a makom of kedusha that catalyzes spiritual growth!
February 26, 2009 6:50 am at 6:50 am in reply to: Talking With Members of The Opposite Gender #663015strivingMemberI’m glad that I found this thread because I was thinking of starting one myself. When I started YWN CR a week ago I was thrilled that there was a frum forum for discussing real things. I asked a Q about shidduchim and I received beautiful thought out answers. I was like, “Woah. This place is so cool.” But then, as I started browsing other threads/topics, I realized that there is a bit of sketchiness situations. I saw people constantly identifying their genders and marital statuses. I even saw borderline (or not so borderline) fliratiousness.
I’m not trying to put down YWN CR cuz I think they do a lot of good. I think that maybe the moderators should be a bit more selective in what they allow through the filters. I mean sometimes the comments are just “personal jokes” between posters and totally mess up the train of thought of the entire thread… and often those jokes are between self-identified opposite gender people.
They say “Everything in moderation” and I think that’s what this place needs. A bit more moderation (in terms of moderators) so that we can keep the good emmesdig content and weed out the leitzanus/not-frum-Jew-appropriate stuff!
strivingMemberI actually have the same question. Like all of the Yehi Ratzons in the Aneini… Should you said “Hashem” or the actual name?
Someone, please answer us! 😉
February 23, 2009 11:59 pm at 11:59 pm in reply to: Chofetz Chaim: It's not just a Yeshiva. It's a way of life. #989121strivingMemberHey. Thanks so much for the answers! YWN Coffee Room people are so cool! 😉
Question: Do a lot of CC ppl have internet in their homes (or movies) or is it as varied as any other yeshiva?
strivingMemberHappiness is knowing where you came from and knowing where you’re going. Even if you’re not smiling and laughing all the time, if you feel that life has purpose and everything you do is in sync with that purpose, then you are really happy.
strivingMemberthanks so much for these websites… but all of the sheet music on these sites is only for one hand… it’s like the basic tune. does anyone know where i can get the real stuff… like the score that the pianist has at concerts! 😉
strivingMemberveyatziv:
Thank you so much for your beautifully thought-out, informative answer!
I’d love to be where you are in 10 years! 😉
strivingMemberI was at a vort the other day and I went to get some food. A girl said, “Hello- it’s not good for shidduchim – you shouldn’t eat at vorts.” A looked her straight in the eye and I said, “People who won’t set me up or let me marry their son because I eat at vorts are people who I don’t want to get involved with and I don’t care what they think!” And I proceeded to guiltlessly (not a word) cut a slice of the delicious looking chocolate cake and sat down and ate it.
Just because some people have crazy random standards doesn’t mean that our lives have to be ruled by them. Just a thought…
strivingMember“I keep looking at the title of this thread and it’s really bothering me.”
ames- I put the word reality in quotes because of the classic parent line: “You aren’t being realistic.”
I totally agree with what your teacher said– that I can’t feel like I’m being a martyr in supporting my husband- I should be proud of it and not feel like I’m missing out! My point wasn’t: “How am I going to have enough money to have a husband learning and still afford all of the luxuries that today’s society has convinced us are necessities?” it was more like “How am I going to support a husband in learning and not end up on welfare and foodstamps?” See the difference?
strivingMemberThank you so much to everyone for your advice and feedback! It’s a frustrating thing that if you tell a shadchan that you want a boy who’s working part time, they’ll think you’re not serious about torah…
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