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Contact Ohel. They can probably help you.
LMA: Well put. There’s a famous saying that when we don’t make kiddush (referring to to separating ourselves from the goyim, see kiddushin 2b) the goyim make havdala. Much has been written on the holocaust & other tragedies in klal yisrael that came about when we tried to join the goyim, as the ???? says ??????? ????? ?????? ??????? ??? .
Is anyone going to really debate? I would suggest discussing these issues with Rabbi Ephraim Buchwald, he is very knowledgeable in both the MO circles & the UO circles. I never spoke with him in my life, i once heard a tape from him regarding this. I wouldnt mind debating though.
whats the name of the sefer mentioned?
mommamia- I deal in social work, there is a fellow I’ve worked with on a recent case by the name of Simcha Feuerman. He is great. There also is a fellow Donny Frank who can help you. I assure you that there are alot of people in your position unfortunately, & you most definitely should go for assistance. Hatzlacha