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February 17, 2011 6:16 pm at 6:16 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769508smartcookieMember
Aries- in extreme cases where you don’t want to reveal details, then your only choice would be to discourage them from that Shidduch.
But under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t do it.
smartcookieMemberSometimes after a restless night i am more docile and some times the lack of sleep brings out the tiger in me today is one of those days.
That probably goes for all of us, so just know you’re normal!!
smartcookieMemberWolf- I never thought about that because I guess that time of the year the Zman for Shabbos is only at 7-8 o’clock, so Kiddush is a lot later than that.
But if you’d like, I can ask my hub for a full explanation (if my rusty head will remember!).
February 17, 2011 4:30 pm at 4:30 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769501smartcookieMemberAries- I’m a young mother of a few (figure about how old I can be).
Yes, I’ve been involved in Shidduchim a lot since my mom is a shadchan.
And boy oh boy I used to get loaded with info calls.(Much less these days).
Please don’t get offended. Your way isn’t only the right way. I was just wondering about you specifically telling the caller- the shidduch isn’t for you. How do you know that?
smartcookieMemberZeeskite- when my kitchen floor was flooded with oil I certainly didn’t thank Hashem! It’s just very sweet to put it down on paper! Because truthfully, when an ordeal is over, we know, that ultimately it was good, even though we see no good at all.
I really should work on thanking Hashem for EVERYTHING!
Hhhmmm… Let me think…
Hashem has given me a healthy child, who spilled it! Baruch Hashem!
February 17, 2011 1:18 pm at 1:18 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769495smartcookieMemberAries- I’m just wondering how you aren’t scared about taking the responsibility of pushing away a Shidduch by saying- it’s not for you.
smartcookieMemberGuy- you were probably one of those posters who didn’t post too often.
smartcookieMemberMclarens are great (quest/techno). They’re not too cheap though.
People are happy with Inglesinas as travel strollers, but quality isn’t too amazing.
February 17, 2011 5:13 am at 5:13 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769492smartcookieMemberIm MUCH MUCH MUCH MORE wary about telling someone “the shidduch is not for her and I am not going to go into details”. Imaginations go wild, and thats fuel for Lashon Hara.
Same here. I would never tell this to someone. But for a different reason:
Hashem is the ultimate Mezaveg Zivuggim. He has done some very interesting ones already. Who am I to decide if this Shidduch is/isnt for you? Maybe Hashem has a plan that doesn’t look right to the human eye.
smartcookieMemberYogi- we don’t make Kiddush between 6-7 2 either. But there’s a special Tefillah to say if you do want to make Kiddush in that hour.
February 17, 2011 3:40 am at 3:40 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769488smartcookieMemberHappiest- that was a very smart move. People have to face their challenges and make them work for the best, instead of ignoring them and causing problems.
May you find your Bashert soon!
February 17, 2011 12:48 am at 12:48 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769484smartcookieMemberMdd- so you resent Chassidim because they feel superior?
This is a major stereotype. Chassidim is a general statement for thousands of Yiddin. Start looking at us individually.
Im not bothered when someone feels better than me. I think of that person as perhaps not the smartest.
February 16, 2011 10:43 pm at 10:43 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769475smartcookieMemberMdd- which part of my words do you agree with?
smartcookieMemberZeeskite- I got that. I was just saying that even if it would leak(like my oil spilled),it’s also a chesed from Hashem, but is not so clear!
smartcookieMemberMod 80- with all due respect, I don’t think your comment was nice. As weird as his posts are, you shouldn’t make fun like that.
smartcookieMemberWolf- LOL- that sounds like my home!! We can never train them enough!
After I Bentch Licht, my kids ech give me a big kiss on the cheek. My siblings did this when my mother bentcht licht, and so did my husband’s siblings.
I think it’s beautiful.
February 16, 2011 4:33 pm at 4:33 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769466smartcookieMemberAnd Mdd- I’m just thinking about the irrationality here. What does our way of Shidduchim have to do with your taste of Chassidus?
February 16, 2011 4:26 pm at 4:26 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769465smartcookieMemberMdd- its ok, I don’t need to know why. We can all find reasons to resent each other.
But it’s up to us to love every Jew and not to feel superior because neither of us really are superior.
I work on that all my life. You should too.
February 16, 2011 6:15 am at 6:15 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769455smartcookieMembermdd
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Smartcookie, it is better than many divorces and unhappy marriages. Is it true that by the Chassidim, there are more divorces? Or they just stay married so that the street should not talk?
Mdd- I don’t know what goes on in every Chassid’s marriage. But I can tell you about myself, most of my extended family members, and all of my friends that we are all B”H REALLY happily married.
Yes, many Chassidim know how to treat their wife too….
But you’ll never believe me because there’s something in your heart that doesn’t like us and it bothers me a lot.
In any case, I don’t see marriages working better after the couple dated 10 times. Sorry 🙁
You cannot generalize.
smartcookieMemberS2021- and I had a gallon of oil spill on my kitchen floor today(literally), and guess what? Hashem loves me too!
February 16, 2011 12:14 am at 12:14 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769441smartcookieMemberBpt- of course, some things aren’t even known before Shana Rishona is over! But in my family, so much research is done, that I pity the boy/girl after a while!
February 16, 2011 12:11 am at 12:11 am in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769440smartcookieMemberMDD- that’s very wrong. The boys didn’t go out for supper with each girl and spend hours with her. They chose a girl out of many.
And it’s very ok to drop a girl if there’s a reason for it. Yup, by Chassidim too. But it isn’t a whole game by us.
I’m not taking sides or saying beshows are better than dating, but this is one good part of it.(and prob one of the only advatages to it!)
February 15, 2011 10:37 pm at 10:37 pm in reply to: Information Verification is Vital BEFORE Dating #769433smartcookieMemberThat’s one good part about Chassidish Shidduchim. We find out everything, but EVERYTHING about the boy/girl Before they meet. So much extensive research is done. It doesn’t give boys an opportunity to meet 100 girls BARUCH HASHEM.
I guess our insanity stays intact 🙂
smartcookieMemberYou people are nuts! But I had a good laugh!
smartcookieMemberHappiest- great idea. Tefillah always makes us feel better for some reason!
It’s a real gift!
smartcookieMemberYup, they’re dressed in blue uniform.
smartcookieMemberS2021- I guess it’s not always the divorce itself that’s sad, but it’s the fact that a couple had to go through a divorce and split up for whaatver reason!
smartcookieMemberOfcourse- I think webers fish store has it. I use their gefilte fish and its delicious. Much fishier than other brands, but I’m not sure if it’s totally starch free. I do think they make such rolls though.
smartcookieMemberIf you don’t understand why divorced is so devastating for a family, then it wouldn’t help to explain it.
You said you went through divorce yourself. How many people (yourself included) were in terrible anguish because of it?
Even then nicest divorce, that goes without fighting, is still so tragic.
smartcookieMemberThis is one spooky thread….
smartcookieMemberMost gefilte fishes are like a piece of raw dough. Think about next time you eat it.
I hear there’s aa new one out there- Feldman’s, and it’s pretty good. If someone tries it please let us know!
smartcookieMemberI always knew that if a person remarries for whichever reason, he may not be buried near his first wife when he dies.
smartcookieMemberI think Royal is a cheaper brand of A&B.
Some side info- the cheaper the gefilte fish is, the less fish there’s in it.
The more expensive brands charge more because there’s more REAL FISH in there.
smartcookieMemberThanks Ima- I was just womdering if I’m doing something wrong with the recipe.
smartcookieMemberMy single friend was once told-
Y’know how some girls get married at 20, divorced at 21 R”L, and single again until 25. Or those girls who marry young and are childless the first few yrs. Maybe Hashem is sparing you from such a Tzaroh.
In any case, Hashem should send your true Zivug IN THE RIGHT MOMENT, and may you live only happily and healthy!
smartcookieMemberIma- my prob with this recipe is that its a mush. Doesn’t slice nicely at all.
Any solution how it can come out pretty, besides delic?
I wanna serve it to guests sometimes but I need neat slices.
smartcookieMemberThat’s it, Eclipse is gone
Finished with all that fun
I don’t think she’s reading
All of your greetings
With her computer she’s done.
smartcookieMember2021- please! Nothing to do with the boys! I know an equal number of cases where the boy or the girl were guilty!
Hatzlacha to you and may you be happy in the future!
smartcookieMemberGo into Strauss bakery in BP and try it! Yum!
smartcookieMemberAs much hard earned money as you’re ready to part with for a mitvzah that has no bigger Hiddur if you spend more on it.
smartcookieMemberMarg? Huh? Why would somebody put that junk into Challah that is absolutely out of this world WITHOUT margarine?
smartcookieMemberA freshly bathed child!
smartcookieMemberGarlic! (Fresh, not a garlic breath!)
smartcookieMemberYochie- we’ll miss you too! Sorry you’re leaving with such an attitude. But maybe you’ll reconsider eventually!
Good Luck!
smartcookieMember7.50 is way below average.
They take $10 in brooklyn today, and I heard of some that already take more than that 🙁
smartcookieMemberS2021- demonstration please?
smartcookieMemberEvery roast gets a different recipe in my home. “Roast” is too of a general term!
smartcookieMemberThere is reward for your work, says Hashem, they (the Yidden) will return from the land of their enemy (Obama?).
May we merit it soon!
smartcookieMemberTake care, Eclipse! (I feel funny saying your “name” now!)
Was nice meeting you! Hatzlacha on your future!
smartcookieMemberNo, no, Eclipse- nothing against YOU Chas Vsholom, and I don’t think it was that you’re Litvish. Many teachers by us weren’t Chassidish.
It was definitely the subject, although I love writing! My class was never too fond of it 🙂
I do remember you with the sweetest personality and the most creative ideas!
Pity I didn’t know what a special person you are (as I’ve seen here), but at least I learned a lot from you here in the CR!!
What a small world!
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