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Just say you’ll do it for five minutes. And totally put on some fast music blasting.
Mod. 42 – thanks 🙂 Sorry that I wasn’t clear.
The first B could be the name of the school she went to, like Brooklyn Bais Yaakov or something but she doesn’t want to say where she’s from.
Chananya is uncommon but it’s heard of. I know someone named Chanina by the bris and all people thought his name was Chananya.
No, you just have to give Tzedakah. It doesn’t matter to who.
Mod 42 – I’m really sorry, but I’m totally confused at what you wrote. Do you mind explaining how what you wrote is in response to what I wrote? I’m really lost. Thanks.
The problem with people taking chumros and turning them into Halachos is that when that person says that x is assur and it really is, no one will listen cuz they’ll think it’s another chumrah. So people should really be careful about what they say is assur or not. (I’m not just talking about people on the internet)
Anyone heard of the name Aviva???
Aviva is a very common name where I come from. I know of a bunch of people with that name. Are you saying you never heard of it before???
One major issue facing children of many ba’alei t’shuva is lack of extended family who are part of their community. All their friends seem to have cousins being raised the same way they are, and these children do not. Their grandparents are not the same as those of their friends, and they do not have relatives’ simchos or family gatherings (of the same nature as their friends’) to attend. This can be very isolating for children, even if there are many siblings in the family, as extended family plays a crucial role in the frum community.
I’m the child of a BT and a semi FFB and it is hard not having any family around. (That could also be due to the fact that we live in a different country then them all :)) But you can make your own “family”. My family is very close with a bunch of people that I consider siblings, aunts, even a few mothers ;)… that none of my friends whose parents are FFB’s can understand.
What’s the point of going to the beach if you can’t see anything? All you’re gonna be doing is straining your eyes which could make them worse and give you a headache.
Why don’t you just go to a separate beach?
dead skunk delight – that’s like an oxymoron! Just the sound of it makes me disgusted.
Is it an American thing to have ice cream?
I heard it was because they see the reflection of a Shin-Daled and it scares them.
We don’t let babies look in until they get their first tooth and when I asked my mother she said because that’s what her grandmother did. 🙂
I was once discussing this with a bunch of friends and the situation came up. If you had the exact same sweatshirt, same quality and all but one had a logo and one didn’t. The one with the logo was $100 and the one without was $10 which would you buy?
Everyone said the $10 one without blinking an eye. One ‘friend’ said if my mother’s paying the $100 one and if I’m paying I would get neither.
if you buy it for the piece of clothing thats one thing but if you buy it for the logo, then you probably suffer from ‘keeping up with the Joneses (or Cohen’s)’ 😉
Why not? What would be the issue? It’s not like they are as short as girls shorts.
Bear as a female name is very uncommon, both in the real world and online :)))))))!
lol well I like to be different 🙂 What would you call a female bear in Hebrew? Is there even a real name (that people have for it)? 😉
These are more funny.
(On September 17, 1994, Alabama’s Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: “I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,”
–Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
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“Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”
–Mariah Carey
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“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life,”
— Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign
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“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,”
–Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
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“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,”
–Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC . ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it,”
–A congressional candidate in Texas .
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“Half this game is ninety percent mental.”
–Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark
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“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it..”
–Al Gore, Vice President
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“I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix .”
— Dan Quayle
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“We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?”
–Lee Iacocca
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“The word “genius” isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
–Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.
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“We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.”
— Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.
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“Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.”
–Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina
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“Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.”
–Keppel Enderbery
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“If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there’ll be a record.”
— Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
Two Little Boys
Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, were excessively
mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their
parents knew all about it.
If any mischief occurred in their town, the two boys were
probably involved.
The boys’ mother heard that a preacher in town had been
successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak
with her boys.
The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually.
So the mother sent the 8 year old first, in the morning, with the
older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon.
The preacher, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the
younger boy down and asked him sternly, ‘Do you know where God is,
son?’
The boy’s mouth dropped open, but he made no response,
sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.
So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner
tone, ‘Where is God?’
Again, the boy made no attempt to answer. The preacher
raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy’s face
and bellowed, ‘Where is God?’
The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly
home and dove into his closest, slamming the door behind him.
When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked,
‘What happened?’
The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, ‘We are
in BIG trouble this time,’ (I just LOVE reading this next line
again and again:)
‘GOD is missing, and they think we did it!’
Lipstick in School (priceless)
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington
was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were
beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine,
but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips on the
mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man
would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally
the principal decided that something had to be done.
She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the
maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major
problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. (You can
just imagine all the yawns from the little princesses.)
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she
asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He
took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the
mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers.. . . and then there are educators.
The captain of a Syrian Air Force transport flying over the Mediterranean sends out a MAYDAY message:
“This is Syrian Air Force # 174 announcing we have lost one engine and want to land at any airport in the Middle East OTHER than Israel!” No answer.
A while later he announces, “This is Syrian Air Force # 174 again. We have now lost two engines and need to land at any airport in the Middle East OTHER than Israel!”
Silence.
A short while later the captain announces, “This is Syrian Air Force #174 We are desperate. We have now lost THREE engines an urgently ask permission to land at any airport in the Middle East OTHER than Israel!”
Still no answer.
Finally the captain calls out, “Help! This is Syrian Air Force #174. We have only one engine left and it is rapidly failing. Unless we can land we are going to crash. We need permission to land at ANY airport in the Middle East INCLUDING Israel!”
Shortly thereafter, a voice is heard in the Syrian cockpit: “Shalom Syrian Air Force # 174. This is Tel Aviv approach control. We would like to help. “
“Allah is praised,” says the Syrian pilot. “Please give me
instructions.”
“Do you speak Hebrew?”
“No”
“OK, then please repeat after me:
Yisgadal Viyiskadash Shimay Rabbah……”
Kids Are Quick
____________________________________
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America ..
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Gl enn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
GLENN: ; K-R-O-K-O-D- I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this kid)
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
__________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘ I. ‘
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am…’
MILLIE: All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
now this kid thinking!
______________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It’s the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her
Husband stalking around with a fly swatter
‘What are you doing?’ She asked.
‘Hunting Flies’ He responded.
‘Oh! Killing any?’ She asked.
‘Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,’ he replied.
Intrigued, she asked.
‘How can you tell them apart?’
He responded,
‘3 were on a beer can,
Summary of Life
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats..
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don’t hurt.
3) Families are like fudge…mostly sweet, with a few nuts
4) Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground..
5) Laughing is good exercise. It’s like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional..
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you’re down there.
4) You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It’s frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
SUCCESS:
At age 12 success is . . . Having friends.
At age 17 success is . . ..Having a driver’s license.
At age 35 success is . . ..having money.
At age 50 success is . . . Having money.
At age 70 success is . . . Having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . Having friends.
Random Thoughts From People My Age:
2. Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you’re going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you’re crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk. .
3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
4. Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what was going on when I first saw it.
5. How are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I DON’T!)
6. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
7. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
8. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?
9. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
10. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
11. I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
13. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
14. Bad decisions make good stories.
16. Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I’m from, this shouldn’t be a problem.
21. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
Senior Health Care Solution
So you’re a senior citizen and the government says no health care for you, what do you do?
Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. Your are allowed to shoot 2 senators and 2 representatives.. Of Course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your head, and all the health care you need! New teeth, no problem. Need glasses, great. New hip, knees, kidney, lungs, heart? All covered.
And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you that you are too old for health care. Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any income taxes anymore.
IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!
Senior Health Care Solution
So you’re a senior citizen and the government says no health care for you, what do you do?
Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. Your are allowed to shoot 2 senators and 2 representatives.. Of Course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your head, and all the health care you need! New teeth, no problem. Need glasses, great. New hip, knees, kidney, lungs, heart? All covered.
And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you that you are too old for health care. Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any income taxes anymore.
IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!
Wonderful Definitions
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage: It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Classics: Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouths.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
NEVER SAY TO A COP
1. I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.
3.Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?
4. Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
7. You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8. I pay your salary!
9. Gee, officer! That’s terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That’s how far ahead of me they are.
12. When the Officer says ‘Gee. Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?’ You probably shouldn’t respond with,’Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?’
Sorry that’s its all caps locked, I just copy and pasted it, and that’s how it was.
THE PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO HOUSTON WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET. SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLOND, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE SITTING IN FIRST CLASS THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON’T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.
THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLONDE, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON’T LISTEN TO REASON.
THE PILOT SAYS, “YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I’LL HANDLE THIS. I’M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE.”
HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, “OH, I’M SORRY.”
SHE GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.
I TOLD HER, “FIRST CLASS ISN’T GOING TO HOUSTON.
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
— Alan, age 10
(2) No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with.
— Kirsten, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
(1) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
— Camille, age 10
(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
— Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
(1) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
— Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
(1) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
— Lynnette, age 8 (isn’t she a treasure)
(2) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
— Martin, age 10 (wise beyond his years)
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
(1) I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
— Craig, age 9
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
(1) It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
– Mike Schaffer, age 4 (bless you child)
And the #1 Favorite is……..
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
(1) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
— Ricky, age 10
Daily Handbook:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and pants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s – Energy, Empathy and Enthusiasm.
5. Make time to pray.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2009.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10 – 30 minute walk daily. And while you walk, smile.
11. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistake of hte past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algerbra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh often.
24. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Do the right thing!
32. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Get rid of everything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. G-d heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank G-d for it.
39. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.
If you click on your name where it says welcome, your profile will come up. If you scroll down you will see it says Topics Started.
I only have a Hebrew name and it has a ch in it. I have been to the doctors office where they called it with a j. 🙂 I should probably go by my middle name which is way easier to pronounce. 😉
I heard this family had so many people to name their kid(s?) after that for their legal names the kid was named, (I don’t know if it’s the exact name but something like this) Reuven Eliezer and then at his bris it was Menacham Chaim (again I don’t know the exact names).
So what do you do if you invite someone(not yet known to you, but someone asked you to do this chessed) in need of a Shabbos meal, and that person turns out to be a truly obnoxious guest?
That is what my mother says is the true mitzva of Hachnasas Orchim. Over the years we’ve had a few shall we say interesting and obnoxious people come over, one comes every Yom Tov. And whenever we complain, my mother says that is mitzva of Hachnasas Orchim.
We love having guests over at our house but truth be told, the kind polite guests aren’t that hard to have over and do the mitzva with. It’s the obnoxious people that…let’s just say, Lefum Tzarah Agrah.
You don’t have to invite them again.
Cuz the Bernstein Bear’s were my favorite books as a kid. 😉 lol it came about through a family joke.
Gosh smartcookie no it’s not me if that’s what your implying.
Otherwise, I don’t know what you’re trying to say, sorry. 🙂
I heard of a girl named Berel.
There are a bunch of good quotes on the Inspiring Quotes thread if you’re ready to sift through 22 pages. 🙂 Good Luck! http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/inspiring-quotes
OMG Be Happy that story brings back nightmare of school. In Ivrit class we had to do a bunch of exercises on it, and it was not fun 🙂
Sorry, I have a gadget on my igoogle page with sucess posters and it was on there but it didn’t say where it was from.
This is my favorite – Remember you’re unique just like everyone else.
Blinky – I haven’t had it in a while since normally it’s chocolate chip cookie dough but if you get big chunks of cookie dough I think it does taste good.
The only way you’ll find success before work is in the dictionary. (Poster)
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who don’t mind matter, and those who matter don’t mind. (Dr. Suess)
Pralines and Cream, Cookies and Cream, or Cookie Dough!!!!!
What’s the difference between the Nook and the Kindle? Which is better?
Make the kids work for what they want. For example my brother wanted a PSP (Play Station Portable) and so he had to work long and hard for it. Not in the monetary sense necessarily but by changing their middos.
Or just make them pay for it themselves. If I want something electronic or extra then I have to pay for it. And personally, I don’t see why my parents should have to pay for something I want.
It doesn’t seem like anyone is having a conversation with someone of the opposite gender if they say Good Morning or Good Shabbos. What is wrong with walking past someone and saying Good Shabbos and continuing to walk? Two words is really the extra that the Mishna was talking about?
And why is it a Chillul Hashem and rude to say Good Morning or Good Shabbos?
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2010, WHEN
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t a #9 on this list.
AND NOW UR LAUGHING at yourself.
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TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘I.’
MILLIE: I is..
TE ACHER: No, Millie…… Always say, ‘I am.’
MILLIE: All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It’s the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher