Shticky Guy

charlie brown *rimshot!*

ROTCRFL!! (rolling on the coffee room floor laughing)

PLEASE STAY AROUND!!

But I can’t help thinking will

Mashiach tzidkeinu be black hat or srugie or turban? Will he wear tefillin on chol hamoed or not. tzitzis 1 hole or 2? Sefardi or Ashkenazi? If Ashkenaz, nusach sefard or nusach ashkenaz?…

Great point! It makes no difference. A Jew is a Jew is a Jew. These slight variations you mentioned should not even register in our minds. Some people make whole issues out of things like this (just ask any shadchan…) but that is so wrong.

here’s a curveball…maybe some people don’t want mashiach to

come (yet). what would you say to

them?

I would say the following to them:

Take a look at kinnah 25 of shacharis on tisha b’ av that begins ?? ??? ???. This is the first kinah recited on Tisha b’av that is apparently unrelated to the churban. It mourns the calamities that befell the communities of the Rhineland in 1096 during the first crusade. It is ironic that the crusaders were willing to leave their homes, occupations and families behind to conquer the Holy Land while the Jews there had no such zeal to regain their homeland.

The Jews there were exiles who made their way to Germany following the destruction of the first bais hamikdash. After 70 years, many Jews returned from Babylon but none returned from Worms. The community in Jerusalem wrote to them urging them to return but they responded ‘ You stay where you are in the great Jerusalem, and we will continue to stay where we are in our little Jerusalem!’

This is why the terrible decree was issued in shamayim against the Jewish people, and especially against the Jews of Worms and her neighbouring communities.

Its name is obvious, coffee rooms are where people go to hang out, chill out and relax. It’s a great name.

What would I have called it? I do not know. I have never thought. Maybe instead of chat room I may have called it shmooze room? (Or snooze room on slow modding days). Or maybe the yach room? Who knows? Let me sleep on that one.

I used to think like many posters here that we want Moshiach to come for many of these reasons.

A few years ago I heard Reb Matisyahu at a tisha b’av event where he said that the main reason we should daven for moshiach is not so WE can have an easier or better life or that WE can have or live thru techiyas hameisim etc. Hakadosh Baruch Hu is in galus. He has no bais hamikdash or korbanos. We should daven for Him, so that the shechina should have a home and be able to come out of galus! This should be the focus of our tefillos. Daven for our Father in heaven, not for ourselves.

What a beautiful thought! How emesdig.

” haifagirl

Chief of Grammar Enforcement

Commandos

Fly swatter’s what? ”

I knew this title would bring haifagirl out fighting! It’s the apostrophe catastrophe! (That’s what I meant by unnecessary punctuation in my earlier post). Goq use your fly swatter’s to knock off the extra apostrophe!

I’ll give you a free lesson in apostrophe uaeage.

Reader Beware! This is a

grammatically incorrect story.

Please fix the apostrophe catastrophes.

One day, Arnie decided to fulfill his

lifelong dream and start a sign-

making business. His first project for

his business was to create a sign for his new sign company.

Arnie was pleased with his new sign,

and just as he was about to reward

himself with a generous helping of his

rang. It was the grocer, Ennis, and he

needed a sign.

He shoved the last of the pie into his

mouth, grabbed his tools, and made

for the town market.

sign with a gleam of pride in his eyes.

horror

A couple of weeks later, Arnie received

his second business phone call. This

phone call was of particular interest to

Arnie, because it was much larger

than his previous sign-making

endeavors.

glazed over.

The billboard was for the rather shady

town boat dealer, Sal. The dealership

his billboard. He knew that this time

he had the perfect apostrophe

placement.

SENOR SAL’S SUPERCHARGED

SPEEDBOAT DEALERSHIP

town!!

Arnie called Sal over to admire his

work. Arnie noticed that as Sal stared

at the sign, his face grew red and

steam began to shoot from his ears.

READER! Why do you think Sal is

unhappy with the sign??

ANSWERS!!!

Harry Nomore says:

placement indicates that the sign-

making business belongs to more

than one Arnie. And the only other

Arnie in town is Arnie Lumpkin, and

I don’t think you share ownership

with him! Just move the apostrophe

with singular possessive words, the

with plural possessives it follows

Ennis says:

Enni! How utterly embarrassing!

apostrophes, Arnie? When you have

normally form the possessive by

SPEEDBOAT DEALERSHIP

town!!

Sal says:

Why on earth did you put an

personal pronoun, and you never

use an apostrophe to form the

possessive of a pronoun.

SPEEDBOAT DEALERSHIP

Its speedboats are the dandiest in

town!

Haifagirl do I have your approval?

Shticky, lol. But it means different things to different folks. In this case since the guys are chasidish,

heimish is somebody from their

crowd, i.e. also chasidish, maybe

hungarian.

firstly it is not lol but really sad. secondly that is my point. why do chasidim consider non chasidish people, even gedolim, to be non heimish? do they equate heimish with chasidish? it appears they do. so I, you and reb elyashiv etc are not heimish! boy, I can hear moshiach already

If you have a decent filter it should remove any bugs (and unnecessary punctuation)

charlie brown I did not feel it necessary to mention the father of the house. You’re once of the all time greats here, you with charlie hall with whom I used to mix you up, though lately you are a bit of a back bencher <sobbing>

Zeeskite I don’t know whether to be proud that you included me in your short list or contacting my lawyer cause you accused me in public of leaving a mark on you…

There are so many great posters that I enjoy. Among them are

Wolf

Goq

CA

Squeak

Dr Pepper

bombmaniac

PBA

ronrsr

Noitallmr

moishy

NOMTW

SiDi

shopping613

oomis

Blinky

OneOfMany

DY

Zichmich

TheMusicMan

haifagirl

moskidoodle

ZK

Getzel

BPT

cb1

more

more2

Gefen

yummy cupcake

yentingyenta

GumBall

Ken Zayn

sam2

sam4321

gavra-at-work

kapusta

Cinderella

apushatyid

The Chassidishe Gatesheader

csar

yekke2

gregaaron

Syag Lchochma

onegoal

BaalHabooze

Mod 80

YW Moderator 42

Mod 20

Mod 18

Y. W. Editor

ICOT

Pashuteh Yid

poster

pcoz

2scents

bygirl93

Feif Un

M.O. Chossid

Health

ItcheSrulik

mommamia

shira

zahavasdad

147

shmoel

ilovetheholyland

spider-Jerusalem

maskingtape

smartcookie

rednails19

Bar Shattya

A Sheep Without A Spleen

Zeidy

Avram in MD

Minyan Gal

Plus many many more

A new study says there is no connection between breathing recirculated air on a plane and catching a cold. There is, however, a strong connection between breathing recirculated air on a plane and losing your luggage

I Pledge……Forget it i changed my mind

Will you please stop quoting Obama the whole time!!!

Welcome back boozer!

Goq and zeeskite lol

zichmich lol some old ones and some new ones. you got a few smiles out of me

My daughter asked my father to carry her. I can’t carry you he said you’re too heavy for me. No I’m not she said, my father can carry me and you’re older than him… ☺

your name indicates that you probably get more Aliyos than the average

hi always it’s always great to see you.

The parchment, or Klaf as it is called,

used for the Sefer Torah, is made

from the hides of an animal of the

Kosher species. The most preferable

quality parchment is Shlil, the hide of

the embryo or a newborn calf. The

surface of the Klaf should not be

coated or glazed. Approximately sixty-

two hides are needed for a complete

Sefer Torah. The average size of a

newly written Sefer Torah is between

17 to 20 inches however, smaller sizes

are available.

Kosher Parchment called Klaf must

be prepared specifically for that

purpose (ie. the klaf for a Torah

cannot be used for Tefillin, and vice

versa). The parchment must derive

from a kosher animal, usually a

goat, bull /cow, or deer. The Klaf is

meticulously prepared by the

Sofer, who first soaks the skin in

lime water for nine days to remove

hairs, and then stretches the skin

over a wooden frame to dry. The

Sofer scrapes the skin while it is

stretched over the wooden frame

to remove more hair and smooths

the surface of the skin in

preparation for writing on it with

the use of a sanding machine. When

the skin is dry, the Sofer cuts it

into a rectangle. The Sofer must

prepare many such skins because a

Sefer Torah usually contains 248

columns, and one rectangle of

parchment yields space for three or

four columns. Thus a Sefer Torah

may require up to 80 or more

skins in all.

Finally, When the parchment sheets

are ready, the Sofer applies a

straight edge to draw a writing

pattern – usually forty two

horizontal lines across the

parchment and two vertical lines

defining the boundaries for each

column. He also leaves a blank

space between the area designed

for writing and the margin –

(according to the tradition, it has to

be five fingers wide). Thus, a Sofer

will have at least three to four

columns on each piece of

parchment – called amudim (amud –

a column). In general, there should

be no less than three amudim on

one yeriah (sheet or folio) and not more than eight. There must be a margin of three inches on the top, four

inches at the bottom, and two

inches between columns. Now the

parchment is waiting for the writing

process to start.

Matisyahu – what are you doing with his cds?

Are you ALSO suffering from Doublepostititis?

again

Thank you all