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I think it’s better to have emunah Hashem will send me someone physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy.
I guess I’ve been proven wrong.
Yes I’m interested in a learner or learner/earner.
Look if he is working on himself than that’s another story, but only if he has the goal of stopping and it actually trying to get there and seeing people, going to meetings and stuff to stop his addiction.
You may think “Oh, it’s just smoking” but in reality it’s an addiction, an escapism that needs help. I’d look at it in the same way as someone with a smartphone.
I try to visualize a feeling. Like a warm feeling of like a father giving me a hug, putting his arm around me, before I go to bed sitting by my bed and asking how my day was.
You say it can’t be THAT dangerous. Um are you just saying that because you feel like that or because you have read studies and show it doesn’t affect your health negatively.
Also I’m in shidduchim and I always get told by everyone that you don’t marry someone based on the fact that they “want to change” or “might change”.
Also it’s not just the smell, (which who WANTS to get used to?) it’s also the danger of second hand smoke. I wouldn’t want that around my young children. Do you know based on studies in Israel they just banned smoking in playgroups and pre-schools etc, even AFTER school hours. Because the smoke and it’s dangerous affects can linger there for up to 10 years!
Look I cannot control the world and my kids will probably be exposed to smoke, but not on an every day basis in their own home, yard, porch, and car!
It’s VERY hard to overcome that addiction. One pack a day is too much too! It’s so dangerous.
Also some girls hate the smell of smoke, it gets EVERYWHERE. All over the clothing and they stink for HOURSSSS.
Ew.
But mostly, I don’t want someone addicted to something so unhealthy.You need to be a healthy human being in order to have the responsibility of marriage on your shoulders. You can’t just smoke all you want and die at 50 leaving behind a widow and 10 kids.
@happyboy123 It’s amazing how many girls care about marrying someone who values their health.
Baruch Hashem.I do not need to “visualize him”.
RebYidd I don’t think so. As far as I know I was and still am the youngest user in the CR.
I know there were one or two people a year or 2 younger but none who began writing here as young as I did.Tipping is entirely optional.
I’ve been to places that don’t pay salaries and the tip gets included on the bill in the total cost.
I assume most places where I live, in Israel pay salaries.If I feel like tipping I will.
If my waiter didn’t do a good job I definitely won’t.It’s a different place these days, I’m not a kid anymore. I have a life.
In addition most users are on USA time so I just get left out from the conversations.
On the big debates there’s so much back and forth between the same 4-5 people that I feel like no one will even see or acknowledge my post.I’ve met a few rabbanim and a lot of frum singers
@Singlemomof4 I’m sorry for you pain. Unfortunately this is not the only thing that has stigma in the frum community. Abuse, mental illness, coming from a neglectful home, and so so much more are also that way. There’s many things that need to change.
Remember though although the community or society can feel and seem messed up and unfair, Hashem runs the world. He will send your children fiends, you friends, shidduchim, etc.
The CR and News site are run by different people.
I think Joseph is trying to say that there’s a difference between a problem and a crisis.
Everyone is getting hung up on the fact he used the word hock, it’s slang. He just meant to find out what is so great there that everyone loves.
I;m in shidduchim, haven’t been here for too long but I’ve learned a thing or two.
When people want to know what “type” they don’t mean for you to tell them just their personality, or values. It’s slang for “Describe the type of person you want to marry”.I am quite open minded like you. And after datings for a bit, I found that the only important thing to look for is middos and hashkafa. Generally personality, chemistry, attraction, and values cannot exactly be found out until you go out on a date.
Middos aren’t just character traits, but it’s also expression of those traits. Responsibility mixed with my hashkafa is can be expressed as having a mentor or a rabbi. Do you get that?
Hashkafa is tricky, I’ve dated so many people who have my hashkafa, Meaning like, yeshivish home, and no secular media or smartphones, BY schools, etc but don’t have the honestly, depth and growth I am looking for. I was turned down over a really great guy once I said so yeah I am still reading some secular mystery novels and such but I’m working towards stopping. Within the next 1.5 years I plan on hitting my goal of not reading secular books at all (Except self help books, cook books, technical stuff like that, not that I buy those books, but if I were to need a specific non-jewish one I would no hesitate).
Although he had SAID he wants to be there one day, he was taken aback that when I mean I’m getting there, I’m GETTING there. I have a plan, map and I’m on my journey, and I WILL get there, I have a date too! (Pun intended).
Last thing I’d say is there’s lots of things you can settle for, like height, age, career, etc, but hashkafa and middos are 2 NEVERS. Hashem sends you your zivug and you should NEVER have to lower your standards to find your zivug.
What is hock?
I think it’s a great experience. You do need to be well prepared though and be on guard. I know too many people who tried drugs there and went crazy…there’s a lot going on.
But if you stick with a good crowd, go daven, and don’t accept anything but food and water from others to put into your body (and don’t accept anything to put in your suitcase) you should be fine.
I know lots of other people who WAIT for it every year!
People are very unique. You don’t find yourself having a better connecting in certain shuls? I feel more connected by the kosel? Our environment does greatly affect us and can help move us spiritually. I love nature, I feel more connected davening in a forest than me own room or a bus ANYTIME.
In Israel Chassidim generally marry at 17/18.
Are you saying the hechsher doesn’t know that they are being lied to?
If so you should report this to them.No it’s not acceptable. Unfortunately many people are in shidduchim who shouldn’t be, and many people get married to unhealthy people and miss the red flags. I’d say this is a red flag.
Also my Rav holds it’s assur to back out of a date, depending on the situation, but once you said yes, you said yes. Unless you find out that the potential spouse is a murderer or has major issues or something really big. If he’s a regular guy and you just heard something you did’nt like so much, too bad.
ubiquitin, isn’t it a mitzvah to serve Hashem bisimcha? Using the siren to commemerate something is a goyishe idea and many rabbanim hold it to be assur.
Takes2 toTango, pretty sure lots of kashrus is mixed in with health issues, like not eating bugs, blood, etc.
If the mashgichim have to lie there, than how do I know the hechesher doesn’t lie in other places?I personally wouldn’t eat the hechsher at all then.
If a mother is too involved than the child should consult with a Rabbi or teacher.
I know many people who’s parents have limited involvement.
If the daughter does not see a problem with her mother’s behavior, or is too weak to stand up to her perhaps she is not ready for sihhudchim at all. Just my 2 cents.Just received my glasses yesterday. I’m in shock, they are better quality than the store on my block who checked my eyes out. The ones in the local stores are much more flimsy.
My eyes are still adjusting as I haven’t worn glasses in a while and my prescription changed, but they look like really good quality glasses. Would highly recommend them. Also it only took 2 weeks to get here.
Why only yeshiva guys
Girls don’t only record classes ever?If it’s not safe and checked who on earth made it kosher?
That’s interesting. I live in Israel and many yemenite and sefardi brides have a henna party on their vort and it’s a old tradition. I was at the vort of a good friend of mine who is sefardi and there was a massive henna party. It’s pretty common over here.
It’s an AYLOR question. Some rabbanim who say not to commemorate say you should stop if you are in public place.
Hashem wants us to be happy, we have a mitzvah to do that every day. Holocaust day is no exception, and we have no reason to be sad or commemorate anything. It’s more about the sirens which is a goyish concept. Why does the government need to tell me how I should commemorate the holocaust? I’ll do what I want in my own way.
I do websites and stuff. Things without the code can get hundreds of spam messages a day, it’s frustrating to sift through.
at a 300-1000 dollar markup it IS insane. Glasses were cheaper when your parents needed them!
How sad…a medical necessity for many is so expensive.A bulletin board is the same way.
Even the lenses. Both that and the frames only cost 3-15 dollars to make.
The mark- up in insane.slominer, do you know it costs HALF of what Zenni charges to MAKE glasses?
80 percent of the glasses companies in the USA are owned by one company, Luxottica (do a google on them). They also own most of the biggest chain glasses stores and the glasses insurance. In short they have a monopoly on glasses, and even if a new company wants to sell cheaper prices, they also own the stores so they won’t allow them in their stores and the new company won’t make money. Then they buy them out.
In Israel they are cheaper than the USA, but again, I can tell my local glasses shop has the same frames as Zenni, stuff from ebay that costs 5-20 dollars a frame. But they charge 200-800 shekels. Why? Because they know they can.
Do you know how much it costs to make an iphone? 50 dollars? Maybe? They sell at 600 though.
They ship internationally. Many sites ship to Israel these days…if not most.
9.95 flat rate shipping. Many people here order glasses from there.Just ordered, I’m waiting for mine. I’ve only heard good things…
It’s true that if you need to tell someone important information, than it is not loshon hora, like many posters have mentioned.
But the Torah isn’t this type of thing where it says: “Here’s the exception, so go do whatever you want with it”.
There halachos of what information is muttar to say and what isn’t. What details need to be mentioned and what don’t. Not every single detail and juicy word is relevant to get the point across. The wording of the article, and of the headline also need to reflect that too.So yes there’s things we NEED to talk about. It’s not about that, it’s about HOW we talk about them.
Agent Emes always wins.
I love both litvaks and chassidim and their paths are queally valid, so obviously no question there.
Heyyy I definitely remember you!
Not too much I’m afraid, since I was a self-centered teen back when you were around and I’m really bad at keeping track of the users here, but I definitely recognize your name and I can say we probably talked way back.How are you?
No such thing.
Mazel Tov!!!!! Amen
It would be correct to say most abusers were victims.
it is incorrect to say someone went through something and thefore will turn into something in the future.“Studies have shown that many abusers were abused themselves in the past.”
Truth.
But abusers often abuse more than 1 victim. Not all victims end up abusers, especially because as the statistic stands, 1/3 of women will be sexually harassed or abused in their lifetime, and at least 1/3 of the women I know if not more, this holds true for. But are 1/3 of the female population abusers? Absolutely not.
See yes, most abusers were abused. But that doesn’t mean most victims end up abusers. The population of victims is MUCH higher than the population of abusers.
Letakein! Long time no see around these part!
I totally agree.When they updated the CR format…about 6-8 months ago I think…
Not really I believe I try contacting you guys 3 times at least about a particular subject.
My posts and email didn’t really get an answer. If you want to know what I’m talking about and hear what I have to say, you guys have my email. I would love to work together…