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that just might not pas…
This is so shticky!!!!! if I wasnt half asleep I would give it a try… oh well. I mamish am amazed at what you can do. Curious, kol hakavod, your artwork should be framed!
This is great…!
ONE request and please yell at me everyone if I am asking out of line…
Can we try to shorten the divrei torah and write them short and concise in our own words so that I dont develop ADD as I read and only get hana’a from part of the divrei torah?? I think everyone will be more excited to read if we keep it as short and sweet vortlach!! again- feel free to tell me I am so wrong! I can handle it 😉
today’s scenario… someone is speaking a juicy piece… you are in the room and it is someone that you can not make stop. what now???
There is an old song “Thats why Hashem gave us two lips to keep our mouths shut tight, and two lobes to close our ears from hearing things not right… lik e LH!” I have a habit that I developed that when I hear someone relating juicy gossip, I repeat over and over to myself “I am not mekabel” so that I can block it out!
People can also make smaller gatherings in their houses today to split up sefer tehillim or just say specific perakim- tell your neighbors and friends to hop over to join and daven for klal yisrael even if you can’t make it out to a shul.
Everyone have a meaningful and successful fast and daven hard today. May HkbH protect klal yisrael from any and all harm!
ok- this happened before- You just reminded me curious…
Parent calls up and the shidduch call is going well, then they say, I heard that the person may have done xyz or had xyz happen to him/her and nobody is giving me much info but I know that you know him best! (ouch)
BH I was able to work it out. I knew that although the situation happened it was being taken out of context and it would not have had any affect on the shidduch whatsoever. I did tell the parent that if they ask direct questions I may be able to help them out and I was able to explain the situation in somewhat of a positive light.
Other times you just have to try to be quick and think of a way to get out of answering right away. But it is important really for us to try not to be the ones to think we have the achrayis to share all types of info. Let us ask shailos when we dont know. I asked one person that confided informartion to me to please not give me as a reference! The truth is I have wonderful things to say when I am called. It is so hard though. And thats why we have to learn these halachos again and again.
Anymore scenarios or feedback on this last one??
Also how about when you give information and you use certain words freely that mean one thing to you but completely different worlds to others… so many lives can be black marked that way with very hard to repair damage!!!
Thank you thank you!!! man asdfghjkl, you is da party man!!! Arent you hours ahead??? unless I am just utterly foncused! do you perhaps work night shift?? don’t get me wrong, YW nightly parties would not be the same without you. I just dont knwo how ya do it! 🙂
This is so nice!!! Thanks R’ (J)Yoseph! It is so true.. I can not begin to tell you how many times I have had people tell me they are who they are because of someone out there that has no clue they shook the world!
One friend told me at their chasuna that they are at the chuppah and about to start a life B’derech Hatorah because of my mother. When I asked my mother, she was clueless! She said she remembers maybe one or two tiny incidents that may have left an impression! But we never know who is watching!!!
Imagine you are walking in a store or an office and you realize there is a camera videoing you. If you are a girl you may fix your hear and stand up straight, if you are a man or bachur you may try to look cool or shticky with the swagger of your walk and flashing your shtady phone… but think about it… are you only making an impression when you know you are being watched? Ayin Roah…. HkbH is always videoing us even when someone else isn’t and we should be careful to be seen as we would want to be seen at all times even when we dont know we are being watched!
In shul, you are davening and a chashuva Gadol walks in and is looking at you- nu? I bet I know how hard you’re gonna shuckel! Well, are you going to have so much kavana when he isn’t there. The Aibeshter is watching and even someone else whose life you might change for Dorei Doiros!
Hehe, sorry I wasnt trying to make my own Dvar Tora, just giving my feedback and Reb Yossel’s beautiful piece.
Ah, I like your answer 42. Shkoyach! I don’t know if l’maiseh it can be classaified as exact Lashon hara but it sure is avak and bad habit for real life as well as other issurim possibly involved and I think it is important that we all realize when we tease eachother that we should be careful even though we dont really know eachother (at least mostly… and those who do know who they are and it may be an issur causing them to be mekabel a LH that they read!)
Interesting thought… happened to many in here Im sure- You get a call about information for a boy or girl regarding a shidduch. You know some not good things or potential negatives (although not outright dangerous to the marriage) and you are asked about this person. You dont want to lie, you don’t want to tell the truth necessarily, and if you say I’ll have to call you back because I have to find out if I can tell you that- it will be obvious you have something bad to say… what would you think the proper thing to do is?
(By the way I really think we should use this forum to bring up real life scenarios that we get into on the spot and see how every one would react and the proper reaction!)
Rabboisai… this is a PARTY not a study group!!! Start a different thread for all the clep stuff 🙂 Nu… anyone beg to differ?
Wait, I have a shaila…. if… (ad the shaila niggun as I ask) we all are anonymous as in a site like YW and we insult ppl and talk abt ppl when we make fun of them, does it hold like Loshon Hara mamish cuz l’maiseh i think no actual harm is done (though there may be an issur of oinaas devarim….) but If I say I think “lkjhgf” (ploni) is a shikkur and has no clue what he’s talking about… we all know maybe who ploni is by screen name but we have no clue in real life so…. is it just not a good habbit or actual LH? Hope that made sense. I assume it is anyway but just curious (sorry curious to use your name!)
I guess the party is over for tonight… mods needed a break!!! Good night and good shabbos!
Mods… thanks for this thread! Maybe make it a sticky! I really like this idea! I’ll even offer to add when I have a chance but Monday is not gonna work…
Look in the Yated classified, there are always rental options… what neighborhood are you looking for… there are nice neighborhoods through out but depends on what you want. Major tourist attractions are Miami Beach. North Miami Beach has a beacutiful Torah Community also and may be cheaper… Be careful though if you are staying in hotels you may be exposed to lots of pritzus (dont know what you’re concerns are but consider yourself warned in advance) You are better off finding a house in the communities then staying on collins by the hotels but do your research and make your decisions. There are also some nice ppl that love doing hachnasas orchim and you can contact the rabbanim there to find out abt who they are. Enjoy!!!
Party?? And its not even chanuka or purim!!! Count me in (oy, I’m so tired… maybe this a bad idea?!) First lets get the music rolling. 1 sec, got to plug it in and turn up the speakers, ok now we’re ready…”Mamama…mamamama… Ma toivu oihalecha yaakov…” ok next song “digidigi dadum digidigi dadum…” nu… why am I the only tantzing! Wake up lets mach it lebedik!!! ‘;/’;/’;’;’;’/”””/////’/”;;’;’;’ don’t ask I jst was tryin ot some new dance steps to throw into the circle wow! I need some water I am shvitzing out of every pore!!!
ok where’s the food…. mmmmmmm whats a party without the cookies?
well, chevra, what exactly are we supposed to do to have a party over here…. I guess Bklyn and Jo and all the other k-nockers could help s out!
what do you have to say abt ipods vs mp3 players… is it really worth it to spend the extra bucks on ipods? and where are the best places to shop for these online or in real with the best prices and not junky breaky stuff?
ok did I miss something???? did dont have internet claim as a mod?? I hate missing out on the CR… I feel like a diver that did a belly flop when I come back cuz I am so confused!
my phone doesnt bluetooth sngs but there used to be a site called phonezoo.com that you can make your own rings. I dont know if its still around but it workd for me some while ago!
Baruch Habah and Mazal Tov on your new chasuva position #42!!!!! May it be with bracha hatzlacha vechol tuv!!!! We are looking forward to all your accomplishments on YWN hope you enjoy!
Editor… did you say something abt resumes on chanukah?????? ooohhh…. lots of excited wannabees are surely going to be very very happy! 😉
also maybe in honor of chanukah YWN van have chanukah music tracks playing all day when you go onto YWN!
whose providing the doughnuts and latkes??????
Wow!!!! Keep it coming! Dont be shy! Tell your friends and sign up for them!!! The sooner the better… think of the zchus… just one perek per person, thats all it takes so nu…. get your mother father sister brother son daughter in laws friends uncles washing machines….. ok ok you can stop at the machine but lets get sefer tehillim complete every single day!!!!
hey, is this exclusively between the mods bklyn joseph and asdf?????
WEll it seems quite lonely in here so I’ll join… As for the original question, I think 72 is easier to slip by cuz you get hana’a from the thrill of e/o trying to figure you guy out and being jealous of your crazy hours and chashuva positions so you keep getting caught up in these exciting discussions that I bet you foget to focus on all the real moderating stuff. All joking aside you guys are great mods…. keep it up! And maybe Make! sure thas,t all our potss make sens and are morderated correctly?.
(sorry just had to do that to give you real work to do- figured better give you grammatical and spelling work then deal with the controversial stuff for you to edit cuz if I get caught saing controversial things then chalila I may not be able to be a mod one day… ) Just as a joke on the side… how do you know when you’re on YWN too much? When your kid tells you he wants to be a YWModerator when he grows up (cuz that’s what tatty wanted to be but never made it 😉
That could only work of course if we can have a long distance party 😉 hey, the anonomity (is that a word?!? or else I would say anonomousness but that for sure is not a word) is what makes YW so much more suspenseful and “fun” as e/o would prob refer to it as so just keep on in suspense.
charlie brown… was that an admittance???????
this whole thread is cracking me up 🙂
I. L. C. — stands for I Love Chanukah. The person who is it says an acronym like ILC and writes it down on a index card (what it stands for) everyone else also writes what they think it stands for and hands in the card to the person that is it. Then the “it” person shuffles the cards and reads off all the players answers for ILC. You go around the table/circle and everyone has one chance to guess which answer they think is “it.” everyone that guesses it gets five points. If someone thinks yours is it even if its not… then you get two points. Keep doing this with any acronym and see who gets the most points. The best is when you make it really funny!
There is a great Dale Carnegie course that a relative of mine took some years ago.
Mesivta Yesh. R’ Chaim Berlin = MYRCB…
CMON RABBOSAI….. can’t we do better than this???
I imagine Lakewood would either have a gemach for that or someone on here knows someone there that would greatly beneit for it. Try your lkwd connections if you have any.
Well mariner,
It may have made your experiences more pleasant while you did the work not your parents, but has it worked in getting you married?? If so then great but i not maybe you should have your parents more involved. The truth is thougit really depens on the age situation back ground of each person looking for a shidduch and no blanket can be stated if parents should or shouldnt take the lead.
Parents need to be their to guide their child in shidduchim but again they must not have alterior motives and must be clear on wht their son/ daughter needs and be there to help them understand their dating experiences. Sometimes parents just get a good or bad feeling abt it all and many times there is mamashus to this but not always so again… it all has to be balanced out. Thats just about e/t in life… it gotta be balanced out with a few exceptions of course
Cant we just leave the poor guy alone???? If he is a mod then thats up to him to share or not…. just cuz you dont like what he has to say… he’s definitely a learned guy and we are ALL entitled to our opinions! As long as they follow the Torah of course 😉
MrsB… on the one hand you are so right. Parents really can see from a different perspective and have more life experience and can therefore do a better time (sometimes) by using their judgement for their child’s shidduchim.
HOWEVER… unfortunately many parents are still “childish” despite their age and dont do much good when they are only looking for fortune and fame for their children (which is not everybody but does well exist.) I spoke to one mother regarding a shidduch for her son and she is known for negaing almost every girl that came up for her son so ppl were giving up. It just so happens that she wasnt looking for fortune or fame at all but claimed she knew exactly what her son needed and he went bazerks while all his friends got engaged married having kids etc and he hadnt even gone on a date. Another case of a mother being so picky who now has many older children and nobody interested in the family anymore cuz nobody could get through. It is very important to discuss with your child what they are looking for and what you think would be good for them and then deal with the shidduchim. Of course you neeed to be somewhat picky to pick out a suitable match for your specific child but RABBOSAI… dont turn down a good shidduch for a stupid reason that may not bother your child after all!!!
I’m in for it all Moderator when do I get to join 😉 ????
first of all… let me tell ya, you can pick up the net in some very interesting places believe it or not…
As for where I live… I’m still trying to figure it out but i will be sure to let you know as soon as that happens cuz I sure am a bit confused as to my place of residence.
(Wow, I sound like a homeless guy! maybe YW should provide a virtual homeless shelter…!!!!)
I thought the thread was to answer if a boy wants… oh forget it.
Just a cute joke I once saw (on the topic) A Brisk Bachur on a date with a girl from a top seminary (leave it up to your imagination). The girl turnd to the bachur and asks “So tell me, what’s the difference between Emes and Yashrus” The bachur, not pleased by the question replies “The emes is I should leave you right here, yashrus is I’ll take you back to your house”…
Thought it fit the bill but although generally a bachur isn’t interested in marrying a chavrusa (hopefully he has that part of his life already under control) still some guys appreciate an intelligent girl and intelligent conversations… it can be stimulating. other guys just care that she can cook and clean take care of kids and be pleasant looking for him. thats all. it all depends on the guy.
As for the girls learning gemara.. I dunno but I think some seminaries might be getting themselves into lots of trouble with this issur on girls learning. 😉
I was raised in a home where the divrei torah at the table were from sefarim of many leagues… from the most chassidish rabbanim to the litvaks of the century. My home was open to every type of Yid that needed a place… I never heard my parents say “they are not one of US” though they clearly layed down the groundwork of the derech they wish for us to go.. and you know we all took their groundwork and developed in the derech that we felt was appropriate for us! I sure had a culture shock when I came in contact with all types of ppl who never heard of such a lifestyle! 🙂 I am proud to say I have shaiches with birds of many different prey!
um bogen…. I am feeling quite, well, like a nobody. Maybe i will change my name. Shkoyach for leaving me out 😉
…. my names my name cuz I say it more than my own name!
I do really appreciate every thing that I can think of that ppl do for me and its my way of being mevarech the klal…
um… what if I am not sure where I live?!?!?
(I guess a nice park bench would suffice…)
ha… could’ve guessed some of these ages 😉 although some are quite amusing
I think it is important that people learn the difference between assur and siyag latoirah… I find that a lot of acual halacha gets crossed over because we are not taught the difference always of whats precaution and what is real. When a girl is told its assur to speak to a boy and then she comes in a situation where she has to, either it can make things very difficult or it can have the opposite affect, once she crossed over that line and it didnt seem so bad then maybe some of the other mamish assur things aint that bad either. unfortunately I have seen this scenario too many times. From boys and girls. There must be separation because of tznius, as a preventative to worse things.
As for the YWN aspect… it taka can be an issue if people step overboard. I wouldn’t rate it as forming a relationship like an IM because we really dont give identities and genders (except some) but a group conversation to accomplish a thought or a point is basically all that is meant to be on this.
If you feel that it is lowering your ruchniyus standards and you are crossing the line, by all means, please refrain from participating in conversation. And if you feel someone else is… maybe give a loving warning or alert our dearest mods and eds. 🙂
Wait a sec here… if not for all us posters… YWN wouldnt be as big of a hit as it is (I chas veshalom am not degrading YWN I am only kibbitzing with my point to follow) and therefore we should get paid as “editors” or staff 😉
Being a kasher outlet for the velt. (lefi some shitas…:) ) But really for always being on the ball to povide us with the latest hock in the velt so we dont have to get it from treif places.
And for providing a wealth of resources for all of us!!!
I guess you know you havent been on YWN for way too long when you finally come back and have no hasaga of what’s going on in the coffe room!! i guess thats the point when you know b4 hand you were on WAY too much. Its good to be back… I feel like I missed out on some good threads and am too tired to go and read through everything now!!!
Itzik… you say wise words… the wisest was your last words 😉
Yoshi… where am I supposed to put my car when in a 5 block radius there is no “legal” spot for those hours????? It makes no sense!
one more thing, Gitty. You can roll your eyes if you want or just ignore this. I am curious to know if you are a believer of man to man kindness. Do you feel that midos is what is important in life or doing things to make another happy? I am not here to force you to be frum… thats not my buisness. However I do think that as a hakaras hatov to your parents, just to make them have some sort of nachas, would you be willing to choose one mitzvah, whether it’s not to speak Lashon Hara or whether it is to smile at someone and make them happy or to kiss a mezuzah, no milk and meat together, taharas hamishpacha… your choice of ONE mitzvah that you will hold onto as long as you are able, not for yourself and not for G-d but just to do a justice to your parents who do belive in Hashem, for them to be happy knowing that you chose one thing to keep. Whether you take my advice or not, is irrelevent. It’s just a heartfelt request to repay a kindness to your parents who care about you. Think about it and its ok if you choose not to.
Gitty, I have a feeling you have never met or spoke to Rabbi Daniel Mechnic, for if you would have I don’t know if you would think as you do. But the truth is, it is your choice and only your choice to think as you do. Hashem created us with Bechira… we all have our share. And only you can chose how you see the world. And NOBODY can decide for you how you percieve things because that is the beauty of Hashem’s creation of the individual. We know we have a Torah. You know we have a Torah. You know what the Torah says. You may not have been given the greatest feeling and connection to it and being that you seem to be a very intellectual individual you have chosen to use your intellect and feeling according to your desires. You may very well be happy with your choice and nothing any of us yell at you will change that.
We belive that there is Schar and Onesh we believe in Olam Habah and Olam Hazeh. We believe in Gan Eden/Olam Haemes and Gehennom…or Heaven and Hell as you would say. You don’t. That is fine, don’t belive. But let me ask you a question. When Mashiach comes (Which you probably dont believe he exists or will come) So lets say he is real and does come. Then where will you stand? Will you decide then to believe? Will you then want to be part of the Am Hakadosh? Will you then feel a connection to the holy roots you come from? Or will you continue to chose your path among the non believers and be left behind from all the people who will be rewarded.
Gitty, please realize that I am not snubbing you. i have no interest in that. I just wonder if you allow your intellect to work like this. To say you dont believe in reward and punishment, even the atheist scientists have proven that we respond to reward and punishment. That is how we were created (Unless you also belive that we weren’t created. That again is your perogative… choose as you please.) You know, many people have questions of how do I know Yiddeshkeit and Hashem and Torah is the truth. THERE IS NOTHING wrong with a person who has questions!!! NOTHING!!! ANd that is for everybody to know! There is something wrong with a person who refuses to find answers for those with questions. And there is something wrong with someone who asks, and when proven refuses to believe.
But Gitty, again, YOU are allowed to choose what you want in life if that is what you feel is right. I hope you are happy. I hope you keep a good connection with your parents and realize how much they love you even tho it may be hard for them to accept your differences from them when they brought you into this world and cared for you and raised you to be a product of them. But if you ever do decide to belive in Hashem and His ways, please make it your buisness to share your wisdom with the world because you will be able help a lot of struggling people because you are smart and thinking anf thats what they need. Good luck in life Gitty… remember always to think before you choose and think well.