Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
whatshaiches
“Only time I have to excersize is at night, any ideas what else to do to cool off?” What do you mean cool off? Do you have trouble sleeping because you exercise in the evenings? I like to read in bed, that relaxes me so I fall asleep. Boruch Hashem for kosher lamps, now I can read friday night in bed on Shabbat as well!!!
Boys and girls should dress nicely and fashionably (but not put a major hole in their parent’s pocket book with these designer brands, gevalt!!)
One thing dieters can take advantage of on yom tov is SOUP. Unlike shabbos, on yom tov you can warm up (or cook up) some soup to fill you up. Here is an old favorate of mine which is very adaptable.
Delicious Vegetable Soup
One can (28 ounces) crushed tomatoes, no sugar added
2 cans water (58 ounces)
three onions, cut up
4-6 stalks celery, cut up
3 beef or chicken boullion
1 bag (20 ounces) frozen carrots
1 bag (20 ounces) frozen string beans
1 bag (20 ounces) frozen cauliflower
1 large head of cabbage, cut up
combine all ingredients in a VERY LARGE pot. Season with your favorate seasonings. cook until celery is fork tender, about 1-1 1/2 hours. I like to take part of it and blend and then put back into pot. freezed well for succos too, enjoy!
Hey, how about low cal. section, YW??
Did you see the flier stuck in the papers and magazines, the gedolim are promising big schar if you support this charity for the poor. well, how about the gedolim doing something for our schools. Pretty soon young couples will say I can only have one child because that’s all I can afford! I have friends who are both working and struggling because they have seven or more children, and these are frum professionals, how much more can they be expected to pay, they are already paying building funds. By the chassidim they have so many kids, yet all of them have a school because the community takes responsibility for them and they make sure they have enough room because the rabbonim and community takes an achryus. By us yeshivish there is no one gadol everyone listens to and there is no achdus, and our rate of kids that are OTD is going up and up.
yanky 55, just don’t tell them you got it on the internet (gasp)LOL
Yossi, thank you. I do know about this website, they are excellent. just wondering if anybody out there in yeshiva world knows about this.
Somehow when you can post something with a false name to someone you don’t know, people leave their middos behind. YW should send us all BE NICE stickers to put on our mouse. Just to remind us (me too).
Does anyone have experience with trichotillomania? any advice?
Every day I am getting at least ten envelopes asking for tzaddakah. We live in very hard financial times. The schools are having a very hard time paying their bills and teachers. If the community would do more to support their school then maybe they could expand their schools and start new ones. Instead of asking the school administrater to accept so and so’s child, how about the Rabbonim doing major fund raising for these schools? You can’t tell people pru u’ rivu and then not accept their kids into school.
In the large high schools, it’s like a factory, everyone is a number, and alot of girls are lost in the shuffle and competition. Everything is marks and studying. If you are not smart or have LD you feel very different from everyone and look for a way to excell or feel good, so many go OTD. If there are issues the yeshivos do not have social workers or guidance counselors, they just have a mechaneches who is basically one of the teachers, who is not trained and is very harried and over worked and meets with each girl one time and that is it. The bottom line is that the school are way too BIG.
Smart Gal…
what are you talking about? Lakewood schools closed until each girl was placed, according to the directions of the rabbonim there! You guy posting above, why won’t you try running a school for even one day and try to do a better job. It’s elul and you should think a little before you write stuff about school administrators, why won’t you put your money where your mouth is and write big checks to these schools who are trying their best with such limited funds. Or start a school yourselves, see how easy it is.
EXACTLY, Bored at work, you hit the nail on the head. For many teens, Judiasm is a yolk of boredom, rules, memorization and perfectionism. Everything seems to be shoved down their throats and they feel like they are a number, especially at the big high schools. They are very angry, and when they go off the derech, they don’t just go off a little but they go off all the way. and since they are innocent BY girls they are not educated about being street smart and the dangers of their actions. It is so sad that love of yiddishkiet is something that some teens have totally lost, and it saddens me to no end!
Teenager- With what is going on nowadays, it is very hard to make a kosher hang out for boys and girls. I went to a Jewish Concert at the racetrack in the country a couple of years ago, it was supposed to be like a Jewish Woodstock kind of thing. The mixed dancing was the least problem there was there, what was going on on the blankets and grass was worse! If you really would like to get some concrete help for yourself I would suggest that you get a private learning partner to learn with and ask questions. hanging out is hanging out…why waste your time, you have a mind you can develop yourself in ways that you never knew. Torah isn’t only about being stuck in the classroom and memorizing, I think this turns kids off. Kids are looking for warmth and love, if they don’t find it at school they turn to the boys and drugs and alcohol. These mixed social affairs are not accomplishing much, maybe I am wrong but this woodstock thing stands out in my mind. lots of luck to you.
Why should the hang outs be co-ed. Rabbi Wallerstien made kosher hang outs in the catskills this summer that was very well attended but he made it separate for boys and girls, he had no problem getting kids. If it is free, they will come.
You are unfortunately correct, there are many kids and even adults that are going through the motions but they aren’t really frum, they are all burned out and turned off. We are living through very difficult times. It is really sad.
Keep in mind that if you are staying in Jerusalem there is going to be alot of traffic, succos it is very busy thank G-d. I would suggest you hire a tour guide who has a van to take your family around, if you need one I can give you mine if he is available. I don’t know how old everyone is in your family, but I liked the water tunnel that’s near the kotel area, near the city of david. Have you ever been to Ein Gedi or Masada, that is also very nice. Enjoy!
Exercising at night might be your problem, it is “keeping you up longer”. I know if I exercise at night it gets me energized and wired and I can’t go to sleep. Try switching to exercising in the morning. If you really want to help yourself you have to make some life style changes.
Do you exercise at all? I have read this helps you sleep well.
Just because a woman is pregnant does not give her permission to wear tight clothing and to not be tznius. This chas v’shalom does not mean to insult anyone, but if someone is wearing offensive and ugly attire they have to face the fact of what they look like to the outside world. As far as the women who want to have children, and don’t have any, I am sure that most of them will feel that their bodies are kodosh and are carrying and supporting a holy body and will want to dress tznius. I know so many people that do not go to cemetary or the zoo, they don’t want to have any negative effect on the baby. well, how about the clothing they are wearing. do i really have to see if you have an inny or an outy or see your undergarment? Where are the husbands that they let their wives walk around like this??? Maybe they don’t realize…
If these kollel families can’t afford it they won’t. The truth is that they make shabbos very simply and really love having orchim, since they are far from home and relatives they crave company. also, my daughter went to many working families in places all over israel. Spending shabbosim in different households was a lot of fun for my daughter, she really got to see different parts of the country and see how other people live in Israel. The seminary places the girls, and have no problems getting them placed, people seem to love to have orchim and share the little they have.
Squeak! Malky Lamm mentioned beer in her choulent recipee. I will keep this in mind for when I get beer for shaloch manos (I usually give this to my cleaning lady for her husband..)
It is indeed very scary to send your kid off to Israel and not know what’s going on. here we are sending our boys and girls off to another country and we have never seen her school, he principal, or her teachers. Sure, you can speak every day on the cell phone, but you don’t actually see them, meet the principal, and see the actual school. If it is affordable, a parent should try to visit the child in Israel and see if everything is alright. I know I did and it was money well spend, hey, what’s another two thousand for a ticket to Israel when you are already spending $25,000.
My daughter’s seminary fed them three times a day. But she didn’t like the food sometimes so she ate out. RIB STEAKS? come on, you are exagerating… She had plenty of in shabbosim also where she ate at seminary.
If we all stopped sending to seminary in Israel, alot of these kollel families would be without parnasah, many of them teach at these schools. so it is worth their while to help the seminaries with shabbos meals. if the sem would have to feed them every shabbos, the price of sem would be prohibitive, food is so expensive there, even more than in the U.S. just my opinion…
my mother in law makes potatoe kugel with the rendered chicken fat. the yellow stuff
So if it costs too much, then the parent tells the young lady that we are sorry but we can’t afford it, and the young lady has the choice of taking out loans or getting a scholarship. It is a luxury, and should be viewed as such. Just like going to sleepaway camp, some can afford and some can’t.
Yoshi, I never went out to tell him to move his vehicle, we just waited. My point of this post I guess is to share what happened to me. This sunday I will shut the ringer on the phone when i get up (my kids and friends can call my cell) and I will not open the door for anyone. I am being harrassed by these pompous and rude meshulachim. It’s not right what they are doing. If they have no manners then I don’t trust them and for all I know they are pocketing the money for themselves.
I went to sem in Israel and I want my daughters to have the same special experience as I did. The ruchnius in Israel is fantastic and it’s not the same to go to seminary here, although I respect those who don’t send and have options, so great for you. Also, I feel this is my way of supporting Eretz Yisroel and my daughters spiritual growth is very important to me. They also mature and grow up in Israel in ways that they can’t when they are home, they have more responsibilities to take care of their own lives cause they have to over seas, no mommy to make your bed and do your wash! they come home so appreciative also that they had a great year, and make so many new friendships. If I had an in town option maybe I would think about it but over here there aren’t any that come even close to Israel. lahitraot!!!
Jent1150- the gentleman who was collecting should not park in people’s private driveways. he did indeed block us in! He should park on the street (I am rural so there is PLENTY of place to park on the street). He did block us in, as one of my kids had to go wait to use the car till his highness was finished, and he should not have been shmoozing on the phone in my drive way. My husband has always given him very nice contributions, but guess what, not this time till I get an apology. If he calls I will tell him how I feel in a respectful way. He should act like a ben Torah and treat others with respect. Especially if he wants a contribution!!!
My family does not like ketchup or honey in the choulent either, but they like tomato sauce.
WHAT, OUTSIDE OF THE U.S. THEY DO NOT KNOW WHO MARK LEVIN IS (the great one??) Don’t they know who G-d is? LOL
Actually, can someone comment on what happened to me yesterday? I had my head stuffed in the closet doing some cleaning. someone was at the door pounding away, so I went running to answer. It was a meshulach, and he was on the telephone. And he held up his finger signaling to me that i should wait till he concluded his call. I was mystified and said to him incredulously “you talk on the phone while collecting Tzaddakah?” So he says, “well, i never know when i will recieve a call!” So I told him to come back to me when he is not so “busy”. He proceeded to his car (parked in my driveway, without my permission, blocking us in) and continued his talk for ten minutes until he went away. I know it was not right of me, but here it is on my day off and I have so much to do and the phone is RINGING off the hook for a billion different organizations, and a line of meshulachim is at the door pounding and ringing. and I do give something to everyone. but to come to my door with the cell phone to your ear?? Where are his manners? He is not one of the nebechs who come, but he is a talmid chochum who is in all the newspapers and i think it all got to his head. He should come back with an apology, in my opinion, but what does everyone in yeshiva land think of this, how would you react?
Potato Kugel
3 eggs
1/3 cup of oil
2 t. salt
1 T. sugar
Beat this up in a large bowl then add:
6 potatoes, shredded
1 onion, shredded
bake in hot oven 450 for one hour. freezes pretty good.
How about asking for the names of three people who you have carpooled with? I find you really get to know what people are like once you carpool with them!!
I wish the author of this letter much hatzlocha in meeting her bashairt. Save this letter and remember how much you wanted this kind of life, especially when you are married with several children and cannot afford to buy a new outfit or that gorgeous shaitel you are plotzing for.
“frumcouple”, this whole coffee room is bitul Torah, or didn’t you notice? LOL
I once put bison flanken in the choulent (it went uneaten, in the trash, do not try!)
Have you heard of Partners in Torah? You can be set up with a learning partner, you learn with someone on the telephone about once a week. you can google them, they have a website. also, if you are able to, there is an excellent place in Israel that has programs for people like you, they are in Har Nof, Neve Yerushalayim. You can go for the year or you can go for shorter programs, like the summer. You will really learn alot there in a short amount of time.
I use one cup of tomato sauce instead of the ketchup.
It is very simple, those colonies that have bungalows rented out to people may not be so clean, as the people just rent, so they may not really care about the place as they don’t own it. The colonies I have visited such as Castle Hill, Moonlight, etc. are owned by private individuals and are very clean. This is how some people are, if they don’t own it, they don’t care. they toss their litter on the floor, throw garbage out of car windows, and leave their picnic lunch remnants on the grass. Others clean up after themselves. It is funny, but at a restaurant I actually have to make an effort not to clean up the table when i leave but leave it for the staff. so not everyone is a pig. all we can do is work on ourselves.
Are they going to make a music police in addition to the tznius police? That should do much good for klal yisroel, to keep our neshamos pure and prevent our young ones from going off the derech. yasher koach to them! LOL
I am glad I am not a teacher or rebbe or principal, for when they go up to olam ha emes, after 120 years, they will be held accountable for all the kids that they hurt and turned off to yiddishkiet. I have wasted years of my life reliving and being angry at the heartless principal my child had. They are not worth my time, Hashem will judge them when it is the right time. Unfortunately I had to go through this for some reason. Perhaps the anon. letter writer should ask Rabbi Horowitz what to do in this case. Hatzlocha rabba!
I can see homeschooling one child, but for most of us who have several children it would be alot to handle unless you have a live in, or at least plenty of household help. I think my kids would have been very lonesome if they were homeschooled. Especially as they got older.
I was surprised that Rebbitzen Twersky had no qualms about addressing this issue in my very ultra orthodox/chassidish town. Good for her!
I once went to a shiur by Rebbitzen Faigy Twersky, it was very well attended by a very frum female audience, including many chassidisheh women. She spoke about women being very overwhelmed, and she said there is a time when one must ask a shailah to a posaik (I almost fell off my chair).
Sarah_613. Thank you for your post, I really should invite more singles to our home. Your post also reminds me to be thankful for what I have. May you soon find your bashert! What is also hard are those who are divorced and have children. We have to remember them as well, they don’t have a husband to take their son to shul, they feel like a third wheel with married friends but not much in common with people that don’t have kids.
It is very sad when people make such insensitive comments to one another. My husband calls it diarhea of the mouth. All I can say is that if you can find it in your heart to forgive this person for this comment it will be a tremendous zechus for you on Yom Hadin.
I wear both shaitels and snoods, but I admire my friends who only wear snoods and no shaitels (even to weddings). They are examples to me what true modesty is, and they look lovely.
It is important to refer this girl to a therapist who specializes in eating disorders. All parents must really keep their eyes open and get their children the help they need. If the parents are in denial, then it is very hard to cure this disease.
It really depends on the relationship you have with your mother, but why not ask her (in a very respectful way) what she thinks about it. kids can have a good influence on their parents, I know mine have. they have respectfully encouraged me to grow, and i am very thankful to them.
I was once going through a very hard time, and felt very rejected. It was terrible, and Boruch Hashem I had a very good friend who shared my pain. She bought me a lovely card, and wrote me this beautiful note how Hashem loves us and how we can’t depend on anyone except our Father in heaven.
It is very unfortunate that teens and adults get rejected by frum teachers and schools and friends, and then it affects our frumkiet. I hope that for “teenager”, time will heal and Hashem will give you the strength to battle all your inner wars. You have your whole life ahead of you, G-d created you for a reason, you are special and don’t let others control your emotions. You are reaching out for help, you said you were getting therapy, and you seem to be on the right path. Just keep on trying, may Hashem guide you to the right supportive people, and you will be stronger as the result of your struggles.
Sem Tatty-
For some girls, yes, the price of seminary is worth it. For other girls, there actually are sems in America, and there has been an increase in girls staying home and going to these local seminaries, parents just can’t afford it. especially if you have a large family of seven girls, that is $20,000 times seven, and the prices have gone up as the dollar is worth less in Israeli currency, plus air line tickets have really gone up. So don’t send to seminary if you think it’s not worth it, and explore the american options.
I did not mean, by the way, to say the crocs are ossur, it is just that they are not to my liking as I think they are more meant to wear in the pool or shower. I don’t think any of us are giving a psak, rather than just sharing our opinions. Personally, I find the crocs more tznius that some of the very stylish and flashy shoes that some people wear. I guess if the holes are not tznius you can wear the Israeli Naot clogs/slip on shoes which don’t have the holes, they are made of leather though and are much more expensive. I hear they are very comfy, and if they are made in israel your money will go to Israel (maybe).
I personally do not wear crocks as I consider them pool attire. If I would wear them, I would wear stockings underneath, and I don’t see any tznius issue. By the way, I am sure we will see plenty of people wearing crocs on Yom Kippur, and the “tznius Police” will not come out yelling….