Shidduchim101

Hi. I am the author of the article and feel I should clarify some things based on the comments. First of all – thank you to everyone for reading it and taking the time to respond.

Referencing the secular world was not to say I am aligning myself with their value system and culture. The point I was trying to make was that we, as a society, should not make singles feel bad for something that is not in their control. Girls should not be made to feel old once they turn 22 – it puts an unnecessary amount of pressure and pain on girls going through the shidduch system. Second point I want to make – while you may have taken what I said as anger towards our society – that is definitely not what I was trying to convey. There are a lot of great things about the from world and I am very thankful to be a part of it. That being said, we are not a perfect society and there is always room to grow and make changes. One of the areas I think we happen to be lacking in (myself included) is that at times, we are too judgmental. You bring up the example of someone being out of work – I am not saying we shouldn’t value marriage. I value marriage and hope Hashem sends my zivug really soon. What I am saying – is if someone is out of work – we shouldn’t give him less respect or make him feel like a “nebuch” just because he doesn’t have a job. Same with singles. I can value marriage but at the same time – just because a boy/girl hasn’t found their zivug yet doesn’t mean we should pity them and make them feel undesirable because of their age.