Rogotchover

It is extremely difficult to get a Heter in Israel – and if you and your wife are not citizens/ residents, it is legally impossible.

The Bet Din of America will only give a Heter if the wife is incapacitated – and even then it is hard to get.

Your best bet is to contact a reputable Dayan who does these things. Rav Landesman of “Kollel Harabanim” in Monsey is one example. And no, you should not have to wait 3 years.