vimpel happens when the child is toilet trained, nothing to do with 3, its not an upsherin. Tallasim have nothing to do with bar mitzva its whenever they go to shul. Fyi, under the “yekkes” umbrella groups from different areas have slightly different minhagim (some wash before kiddush, some dont, there are slight variations in davening etc)and most importantly we are super proud of our heritage!