RABBAIM

How about the Ruchniyus part??? More learning. chessed. finding people in need and alleviating… Bikur Choilim…..

Look at COSTCO. on line as well

The Chassam Sofer seems to say that since pointng it out will create a Kiddush Hashem we are obligated to do so. This is especially true when the cashier will have to cover for losses… so they appreciate it even more when it is pointed out. even without that…. if it is more tha few cents, it DOES create a Kiddush Hashem. Small price to pay for a BIG Mitzvah. Tizku L’Mitzvos!

BINURYEINI ( HASC support group) just ran a workshop about sibs. Call to see if it was recorded or videotaped.

It works for a lot of things…….. it is worth a try. Look at oceanchiro.net

Make an educated decision

Give Brachos to people. If you were attacked and had self control it is extraordinary and the Steipler said your Brachos would be fulfilled. Give one to self too!

Go after school

Rav Shlomo Zalman paskined that slow classical which encourages introspection and does not lead to a desire to dance or be freilich AND chazanus which also focuses on depth of feeling of connecting and of Tefillah is permissible.

1- Why don’t they want you? Real, imagined or societal reason?

2- If you were in their position would you want you?

3- Infatuation or realism?

Let the fathers be there for the Rabbanims drashos, menahels words, awards etc. and then make a mincha minyan (or Maariv minyan)in a different room when the 2 or 3 individual girls speak. Is this a good Peshara?

Rav Belsky shlita paskins that Capella is not permitted during availus, 3 weeks or sefira. That applies if one is listening for musical enjoyment.

Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach ztl said that even vocal singing takes on a din of music once it is recorded. A layer has a din of an instrument. However poskim permit music when driving IF IT IS needed to keep the driver awake. (There are other better ways. Drashos of Rabbis Frand, Krohn, Wachasman…….) But if you need music to keep you awake while driving , maybe you should pull over and take a nap.

One genuine Talmid Chacham who is a posaik knows more than the entire YWNCR put together……… that is how good they are. Embarrased?? No need. the real ones will NEVER make you feel uncomfortable with any question. Still Embarrassed?? Ain Habayshan Lomaid! Still embarrassed?? use the phone……

Hatzlacha. Please post the answer when you get it!

Is it mutar to view the inside of a church?? Is it mutar to view nishuk between ish and isha?? Is it Hashakfically correct?? Will you be proud or embarrassed when the video tape after 120 years shows how you spent your time and what you looked at?? Where is our YIras Shamayim??? Where did it go??

I waited for 4 years looking for the dream person, but then woke up and realized the dream person would be a nightmare. I took out some time,introspecion…. reflection…….. questioning…… counseling with friends and my Rebbi and reevaluated to determine what do I NEED instead of what do I WANT and the n i met the right one BIG TIME!! The relationship surpasses anything I ever cold have dreamt. Align self with Ratzon Hashem and escalating meaningful happiness will ensue.

Hatzlacha!

He sure is and now he is getting scared!

Chometz ia assur in hanaah (pleasure) as well…….. not just eating. That is why beer base shampoo and certain alcohol in some deodorants is not permitted.

1-And how much do you pay the cleaning lady here in NY?? How much better is that than slave wages?

2- But now that it became the norm, NOT to give it shows disrespect unless you are part of the Kehilla which is using CZ for everyone.

Try some of thses ideas. Many work very well.

SPEECH COURSE

Mesivta Ateres Yaakov

IN ADVANCE OF A SPEECH

Fear, nervousness and stage fright are conditions usually present prior to the speech and actually diminish significantly once the presentation has begun.

It is a GOOD sign that one is nervous. It indicates a healthy respect for the audience and the task at hand. Even great speakers have enormous stage fright. In addition nervous energy can be converted to positive energy if the source of the nervousness is not doubt and defeatism. Reflexes are actually sharpened by the tenseness.

How can one channel the adrenaline generated by the nervous system to be positive?

1- TRY TO WORK UP AN ENTHUSIASM FOR THE TOPIC.

A-It makes you feel you have what to contribute to the audience

B- It endows you with a confidence which feeds off the nervous energy.

C- Once you begin, the audience will be active listeners and transmit their enjoyment to you, the speaker.

2- PUT ON A GOOD FACE

A-Nonverbal cues affect the audience

B-The external has an effect on the internal. (Ex. Wearing a sports uniform to a formal wedding or a tuxedo to gym.) It alters the internal by expressing the feeling that the internal really wants you to have.

3-YOU ARE IN CHARGE

You are the one who is going to set the tone. You are responsible for the mood transmitted to the group. Try to feel the responsibility of the group and not focus on your individual experience. Look beyond yourself.

4- IMAGERY

5-KNOW THAT THE AUDIENCE IS ROOTING FOR YOU TO SUCCEED.

IN than majority of situations our audience wants you to succeed. They do not want to walk away feeling it was a waste of time. All research indicates that the audience roots for the speaker to succeed. Look at the audience in positive framework. (If they did not want you to succeed would they come to hear you?)

6- DO NOT DIVULGE

7-BE PREPARED

8- Practice the speech so that you are very familiar with it.

Make sure that you are strongly familiar with your material and its organization within the speech and you know clearly what you are going to say and what you are NOT going to say. Be clear as to what the opening, body and conclusion contain. Make sure the speech/lecture is not only appropriate, but engages the listener and feeds their interest. It will help you feel confident.

9- FOOD CONCERNS

Be careful of what you eat prior to the speech if, you able to eat! Avoid foods which give digestion problems, gas or heartburn. Avoid foods which increase saliva (all type of nuts, spicy foods) and avoid most cheese/ dairy products.

AT THE TIME OF THE SPEECH

1- Burn off some excess energy by doing some physical exercise. It is good for oxygen flow, blood flow and for your mind as well.

2- Still nervous? Sit in a chair and let your body go limp – total flexibility and looseness. Then starting with your toes, tighten up each muscle in your body until you reach your neck. Then loosen up slowly reversing the process. You can do this 2- times and feel relaxed and in touch.

5- Do not hold mike. Do not hold your notes in your hand.

6- Avoid holding anything in our hands, especially a cup of liquid.

7- If you are very nervous, shift your weight between you feet and partially lean on the lectern until it subsides.

8- Know that nervousness subsides once you start to speak until a point when it almost disappears.

9- PRAY!

“Learning is not supposed to be something that makes you fall asleep!

It is how we talk to Hashem”

1- In Tefilla we talk with Hashem… Learning Torah is Hashem talking with us (Nefesh Hachayim)

2- You shouldn’t fall asleep when you learn, but it is OK to learn while you fall asleep!

Take a sefer to read in bed. The yetzer hora will make sure you fall asleep fast!

A Heimishe owner?? Why does he NOT ask his Rav how to deal wiht it?? I once asked Rav Pam about hiring a collection agency and he looked horrified… We go to a Bais Din! Thats being Heimish!