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Gut Voch = Have a good week. And good week to you all – you can still make havdala / so wish good week till tuesday night! Oh maybe it’s too late to wish for you skiaddict if it’s nighttime already for you and so no longer tuesday so take it late for this week and early for the next one! And good chodesh whilst we’re at it.
Hey people, how are you all faring????
ilovetheholyland, hey thanks! Not sure what i did to deserve such nice words, but i appreciate it!! I sincerely hope it all works out for you in ALL areas. May the right guy come along QUICKLY and both know you’re for each other. How was this new doctor? It can be so annoying to have to travel far for appointments. i hope it is worth the while!! Keep me posted 😉
Mazel tov! Thank you for sharing your beautiful words with us. May this be one post of MANY similar (although hopefully not to that many years.) You sound like somebody special and i’m glad for you to have found him 😉
Hey, blabla, once again you’ve done it! i like this last one you just posted… The others once again behold the pain.
Kapusta, i think she does write VERY well too! Good to see you at this end of the c.r too i like your posts;)
LSH – very nice piece, thanks for sharing!
SaysMe, i actually did respond earlier to your previous post but before i had the chance to press send post it crashed on me.. i have been thinkin’ of you and hoping you’re okay.
i’m really impressed / amazed with you!! You seem to try so hard to just keep strong and keep going. You seem to know where you are heading to, where you are hoping to get to, and yes, struggling along the way. You talk of “doing your best” – your best is just TRYING, there are times this is just holding on tight!!!
Keep holding on, you’re doing a great job! You’re poem is written very well, are you still feeling this way? You clearly express the struggle of knowing and yet finding it so hard to actually follow through. i hope it gets easier for all of us!! And thank you for your kind words, i appreciate them 😉
Observanteen – how are you faring?!!! You’re words of wisdom are missed on here.
tryinghard – do you still need it? What did you use in the end?
hey ilovetheholyland,
There’s really no need AT ALL to feel stupid, after all diabetes is exactly what you were afraid of! About the “dealing with more” i think that no matter what a person is given to “deal” with in life, he is also given the EXACT amount of tools he needs to be able to (or not to!) deal with it, and therefore there can be no such thing as “more” or “less” … that’s just my take!
For me, i have to watch my food / weight for the diabetes control and it really is tough, esp. so being fussy! So yes, i do understand, in my own little way, where you’re coming from in this matter .. I really appreciate your kind words and keeping me in prayers, it does go both ways!
Keep going strong, you are really amazing 😉 May hashem bless us with the RIGHT one in the RIGHT time and may that be soon enough!
Hey! Blabla, thank you for explaining your position! It’s just that sometimes i spend the time / thought / care into the reply and just want to know that you care for it 😉
Observanteen, the point you made is a very important and valid point. The FIRST step in HELPING YOURSELF is by realizing that YOU are in charge of your life and you are the one to have to change.
SaysMe, you are talking past that stage. Once you’re aware of that, than yes, it IS extremely difficult to go on. You seem to be a mature person who is struggling her way through life and feeling trapped by seeming inability to get away from whatever monsters are surrounding you.
Do you have somebody to help you through when you are feeling the utter despair and loneliness overwhelm you? In a “better” time can you find for yourself a way to go on during those feelings? Are you doing all you can to help yourself? Have you some sort of outlet, be it writing (which btw i think you’re great at!), music, art, baking… Do you find you can pray in some sort of way?
Sometimes just accepting that now is a “bad” time can help a person go further. It takes away any guilt and it can give you the strength to speak firmly to yourself later / get back up. i feel for your pain and i wish it all better.
Blabla, take whatever you can from that for you too! You’re right it IS very tough and restraining from the internet WILL make you feel suicidal, you are not alone fighting this. Please read over the words i wrote to you after your poem on this!!!! I believe in you and i know that you can get through this too.
i hope that today isn’t one of those “bad days” that you’re coming on here to see the replies but coming on a happy day.
Observanteen – this is for you whenever you see this (hopefully SOON!!) : 🙂 🙂 😉 😉
Hey Rebbitzen, so glad to see you back!! Not so glad to hear of the frustration (and fear?) .. i KNOW how hard it is, cofeefan’s questions/suggestion is a good one! Sometimes i put a temp. basal on for a while and that just gets my numbers better at least until i figure out where i can up it more / carb ratio etc.
Do you think the food you eat can be affecting the numbers? Taking plenty amount of time before?
i really am sorry for this and i hope and pray the A1c will COME DOWN quickly!!!
Allsgr8, so glad to see you – you’re missed!!
Oomis1105, put it this way, a good A1c would be in the 6’s, lower 7’s and high 5’s are usually fine too, the problem with lower than this is that it usually shows too many lows. It does depend on who you ask too!! Lots of luck.
ilovetheholyland, thanks! (I think!) i understand why you don’t want to look on the diabetes thread. If you do you’ll meet others who really do care! and yes, some of us really do understand weight too .
WELL DONE!!!!!! for losing, i’m sooo happy to hear!!!!! KEEP GOING STRONG!
oomis1105 – CONGRATS on losing weight too!
ilovetheholyland, just checking up on you… how are you doing? How is it all going?
“just curious, did you/do you have the same thing or are you just nice like that?” Look at the diabetes thread for the answer 😉 i struggle with weight too and i know how difficult it is to be fussy (sigh). And yes, i do care in my own little way.
Blabla, your words really hurt to read. I take it that you have somebody you share all this with and who can help you deal with it all.
I’m just wondering, sometimes i write to you answers and you don’t seem to respond. Is this because you want to hear something different? i read your poetry and once again i tell you that you write SUPER!!! i feel your hurt and i wish it better.
Hey people, d’ya realize we haven’t yet welcomed the new page???? Rebbitzen, you’re missed over here!!!!!!! (as well as all you others!!!!)
RoshHakoel, i’m glad you chose that, Cofeefan and Alls (how are you anyway!!) both seem to be happy with it and a pump is a pump 😉 I wish you all LOADS of luck with it, and yes, pls do keep us informed.
csilver, thank you for reporting back! i’m glad you got the metronic, i know many are happy with it and the CGM is always an amazing addition (in my opinion anyway)
Dx3, how are you doing? What did you do in the end? First thing is to make sure it’s not just this one, because sometimes a raised number can be from, e.g. fighting an infection which you either do or don’t know about!
Than make sure it’s not your basal, i sometimes put on a temp. basal.. i REALLY hope it goes back down for you and ALL OF US!!!!!
Oh – and about shabbos, i sometimes use something different, i.e. my knuckle, to press buttons because, i was told, it’s BETTER to do so. If i’ve not enough insulin i change on shabbos, on 3 day yom tov i always have to, and battery – unless i wouldn’t have pens, i’ve gone back on pens for the day 😉 😉
Blabla,
i hear your cry for help. The frustration is evident.
Please! Talk firmly to yourself! You CAN choose. You ARE in control. You CAN change. The only way any person can get out of a situation is by seeing that they have the power to do something about it.
Doing something about it does not mean ALONE. If you feel it’s beyond you it is up to YOU to help yourself in a way that you can.
The FIRST thing to do is to REMOVE the temptation! It’s putting in front of an alcoholist alcohol and telling him not to drink. I know this is extremely difficult. Don’t look at it as an option, there is no choice.
Perhaps you can get a shomer system on your computer or move it into a different room. Remember, this is something YOU CAN DO! And it’s something only YOU can do. There are people out to care and help but at the end, it’s YOU to make that change.
I hope that you can listen to these words, sent with care 😉 May hashem give to you the strength and bless you with happiness.
Whenever you are able to, try to look ahead and see that you CAN emerge out of this as a better and stronger, happier and healthier person. Keep going strong! I’m rooting for you and i understand the struggle in my own little way. You are great and you are going great. You can do it!
Hey dx3 glad to see you here too!! It’s so quiet this place!!!
Rosh, how is it going? What pump have you decided to go for?
Cofeefan – it sounds really interesting actually! So what do you have on you? Just this thumb sized insulin? Together with or separate from how much to give and all the settings on the pump? Not connected to a meter, is it?
Dx3, like your advice 😉 if i could i’d tell all the parents to help their kids take the responsibility themselves!! Oh well, you have to be old enough for that too :-/
Well done! If you want an easy way out you can find it out very simply online 😉
Observanteen, i was only teasing 😉 and thanks!
Yes, blabla, how are you doing?
Something like “When life gives you lemons make lemonade”? Can you do this in real, maybe a race who can squeeze most or maybe enlarge a bottle to make it massive and either throw something to hit a certain point or make it calmer …….. something like this or have i missed the point?! Either way, lots of luck!
Hey Observanteen, what didn’t you expect?! About the hiding part – we’ve already been through that one! I’ve been busy..
Hey Observanteen, that question sounds familiar! You put it great in words (like usual – need i say that?) The comparable to a test in school is excellent. Life IS a test and i like the way you end, “i’m studying hard”…. you’re trying to do all you can in this world whilst here so that when it comes to the end of life you’ll have what to take with you.
Did i tell you i’m impressed and amazed?!?
Thank you for your welcome, i appreciate that!
Just reading all that has been written here in the last week, the pain is so great and it really hurts to read.
Blabla, how i wish i could ease your pain, take it away with a swoosh along with saysme, puppy …. and all the pain in the world.
Why?? So much pain… what for???? Blabla, i know you’re asking this in your words, in your cry of pain in the words of death. It’s worth it. Why? Because there will be tomorrow, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. How do you hold on, how do you go forward when the pain is just blinding? Hoping, hoping and knowing that there will be an end to it all, that it will get better. Death will happen, we will all die. Whilst we’re here we have to try to reach out, to give, to care, to love, to live. And we have to care for ourselves and get ourselves in control before we can do that for others. And until than – HOPE. HOPE. HOPE. IT WILL GET BETTER.
Death isn’t an escape, why ever do you think it’s better after?
Puppy, I read your words and i’m thinking, “not you too!!” This above ramble is written for you too 😉
Observanteen, you’re writing is absolutely superb. i’m so impressed and amazed at how well you write, and much more, at its content. How you’re able to see past what you’ve been through and seemingly come out at the other end better and stronger.
Either you’re able to write about death so freely because you’re thinking of it as such, or because you’ve distanced yourself from the reality of it. What do you say?
And the A* goes to both you’re pieces btw!
SaysMe – why, thank you so much for your kind words! I really do appreciate them as well as your depth and your say. How are you faring? Been thinkin’ of you 😉
AYC – i was looking for your comments!! Glad to see you added your two cents. Keep them coming and if you read back from where you’ve missed on this thread you can comment “late”!
RoshHakoel – Welcome 😉 i’m sorry you have to join us here although you’ll sure find a very welcoming and supportive group here… it must be very difficult for all of you and i wish you all the very best in coping, accepting and succeeding!!
I know you like the omnipod Cofeefan, although to me it sounds way more frightening than the Metronic / Animas! RoshHakoel, to me the hesitance is because it’s actually attached to you with no wires (how does that work anyway btw?!) whilst the others have the canula with the wires and the pump can than be worn / hidden..
Managing in school, i’m glad you worked it out with the gym teacher! During those school years i was only taking insulin twice daily so didn’t have to have it in school.
According to the circumstances / personalities etc, perhaps you can try to give your daughter as much of the responsibility as possible.
All the very best!! Keep us posted 😉
WELCOME BACK here AYC!!…………;)
Syag – yes, i def. know what you mean!! Maybe i’ll copy your example…
Observanteen – this is also in response to your other thread.
Mod80 / mods – you can delete this soon pls!!
G-d!
Please take away our pain!!
ilovetheholyland, i’ve been thinkin’ of you here and there …. how are you doing? How’s the dieting – did you have to do the liquid one? How’s everything else going? I really do hope you are okay.
csilver – how is it going?!! What did you decide in the end?
Cofeefan, it’s not too late to change – there’s absolutely no reason to make it harder for yourself!! If you really want to at least check with a Rabbi, when i checked i was told if i need to i can even change my insulin.. Using the pump is all d’rabbonon, and a few d’rabbonon makes it easier to allow.
i hope you’ll start using your pump again!!
I sometimes try to use my knuckle to press buttons but was told i don’t even have to do that – metoo, rabbi meisals said that’s not nec.? And hi btw! Been a long time 😉
The rest of you too for that matter – hi! Hope you’re all good and managing….
MiddlePath, just to say i LOVE your songs!!!! Keep them comin’!
SaysMe – you’re writing is really expressive, so beautifully put and… sad. i’m sorry for your pain… betrayal is dreadful… you put it so well.
It’s a really nice vort you shared – thank you! I’ve heard the same idea of 0’s with yichus. Yichus is only of value if you’re the 1. Interesting this way 😉
How are you faring now?
Blabla, you express the pain of wishing to be free… how are you? And yes, it makes perfect sense!
You write about a little child’s pain, yes, it is real for them and it def. has to be acknowledged!!
You’re right – words are powerful. You put it nicely.
Just an interesting thought – those girls you passed by you say, “…I stared, was in awe,
their innocent, naivety,
that’s what I just saw.”
Yes, that’s just what you saw…. what is REALLY going on in their lives we just have no idea….
Puppy – you seem to be in a lot of pain. How are you feeling now? If the love is real, can you allow it to penetrate?
Thoughtful123 – That piece is really “thoughtful”!!! It’s really very good, i like it!! You have a nice style 😉
YW Moderator-42 – THAT’S A MASTERPIECE!! Thanks for sharing his poem.
Syag Lchochma, wherever you posted it, i’m glad you did!! It’s EXCELLENT!!! i understand your words. It’s a rebbe/teachers job to try to understand the child and teach him what HE can understand, and, mostly, impart skills and values 😉 thank you for sharing.
observanteen, as usual, a beautiful letter.. and yes, sad.
Zeeskite, sometimes these “hearts of stone” are so soft that they block it from feeling.
Miritchke – yes, i def. agree! hope you’re okay.
csilver, hi! i hope you come to a good and clear decision that you’ll all be happy with and mainly that you’ll reap from the pumps benefits! Often decisions are a gamble and whatever you choose will be great!
For me, the advantage of the metronic over the animas is the fact that it can come with a GCM which the animas doesn’t.. the metronic also has larger amounts of units to be held at one time which could’ve perhaps been easier bc i use quite alot.
i think i rem. hearing about database being able to be put in but normally i just guess – look at the box / packet etc or use a scale i bought which has the database in there. Cofeefan – yours sounds amazing! didn’t realize you had that option!!
Wearing the pump, in fact i do use the audio often, esp. in public – as far as i know the metronic has an audio button too. As far as wearing it, it WILL work out whatever pump it is, either going to the bathroom or just hiding behind something or other.. i try to not let it affect my choice of clothes!
…. Hope that’s somewhat helpful 😉
Dx3 – how are you doing? Worrying for you and ROOTING for ya!
No 2 situations are the same! Some people may be able to hear about the punishments and work with it, whilst some will not.
It’s not a new problem going OTD. Already in Gamera it talks of it. Before the second world war k”y was losing thousands.
When somebody is desperately unhappy, which is often how one will feel OTD death can be a way out. Terrible way of death? “I deserve it”.
Hey, this title ???? (where are you) is BRILLIANT!
AYC – The CR won’t be the same – you can’t seriously leave!!!!! You’ve had your little break, time to return now!
Hey MiddlePath this is a GREAT piece! You write exceptionally well, that although it was long (!) the flow was excellent, ensuring the reader to want to read further 😉
Thank you for sharing!
hey, thanks! You like? i’m glad..
SaysMe, it’s not easy. Rather, it’s difficult, very, very much so. Perhaps because of the difficulty we have to fight it all the more. You have to find the tools and the words that will speak to YOU as an individual. (You – to every1 of us reading this!) We HAVE to keep going, keep pushing, keep praying and KEEP HOPING!!!! Being positive, laughing of the intensity, seeing the good, helps a lot, although it takes so much energy. (or perhaps BECAUSE it takes so much energy.)
You CAN create that strength. You CAN do it. Believe in yourself!!
Rooting for you.
hey ilovetheholyland,
i’m really so very sorry to hear that. i can only imagine how extremely difficult that surely is and i’m truly sorry you have to go through this. May hashem give you a nechama.
Shidduchim – may this relative go to heaven and STORM IT DOWN!!! Remember, shidduchim is from Above, it can literally happen in a very short amount of time. If you’re doing everything that you can that just keeping praying and HOPING. i KNOW it’s difficult, shidduchim can be such a tough parsha, for the best of people!
i haven’t heard of the liquid diet.. sounds interesting but very annoying! Glad you don’t eat through emotions, it’s not easy to do so ;).
Once again i’m sorry!! Please keep me posted how you’re doing!
Observanteen – don’t give up if you want! 😉 Not the greatest time for me now for some reason.
SaysMe i’m really sorry to hear that. i really hope it will work out okay. Keep us posted! and thank you for your warm words.
Blabla, this is in no way dismissing anything you said or felt. I’m not sure why i’m posting this but this is what came to mind after reading yours – i just wanted to continue it!
(Continued from Blabla’s post above)
…I cry harder, the tears collected into a river of pain. I look towards the little boy again, and I can look no longer. The pain! It brings up all the pain all over again.
Kapusta i can’t leave my post out… but everybody else said the words! And thanks to you too 😉 you’re really wonderful 😉
7 years, whoa, that’s a veryy long time. i’m sorry you had to go through this, i can imagine this is a very hard struggle. Keep up to your name, you sound like a “supergirl” indeed!
ZeesKite – just wanted to respond to you that when i said see you i only meant here 😉 no worries!
yitayningwut, thanks! i appreciate that comment – kapusta if you’re reading this than thanks for the THOUGHT too.
Observanteen -absoulutly great, great and great again. Teach me how you do it 😉
Puppy – welcome back! Missed you too! It’s written well, and it’s sad and yes, true.. our job is to keep going and try to do what we can and with our experience we know that, hey, people don’t live in glass houses. Even if we think we know we don’t.
SaysMe – i hope that you aren’t feeling that way now. Is this something you wrote now or time back? It’s written so beautifully!
Observanteen – heyy, i was out, try again!!
ilovetheholyland – how are you? Been thinkin’ of you and hoping you doing okay! How is it all going?
What i meant is that sometimes the problem of losing weight is the want to eat, perhaps as a release for emotions. .
So much luck i wish you!!!!!! Lmk how you’re doing.
BDH. May his neshoma find rest easily and happily.
Thank you for letting us know. It can be difficult to keep somebody in mind not knowing where he’s up to, it’s thoughtful of you to say so.
ALLSGR8!!!!!!!! Heyyyyy, welcome back!!!! So glad to “see” you back! You’re missed 😉 How are you doing?
Hope you’re right about A1c!!
My numbers were up and down – not all been so high, but yom tov being so “food friendly” (or food enemy) and all of it around doesn’t do any good! Lets just hope we’ll all reach good numbers. i still pray for you all !! Rebbitzen, you too 😉
Observanteen: ;)!
SaysMe – just looking over your poem again – you really have talent! You wrote such a nice one for ayc +1! Keep adding your comments and poems! And nice to “see” you in the other thread, thanks for posting there.