Porty

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  • in reply to: Please vote. Who is correct? #818233
    Porty
    Member

    I think that if it upsets your wife, you should not eat until she serves it. You may be making her anxious because she may feel that she won’t have enough food. Maybe you can compromise and she can give you some food to taste??

    Also, the man may be the king of the house, but if the wife is not happy, trust me, no-one will be happy. Try thinking how you would feel if you spent days cooking and your wife wanted to eat before Yom Tov.

    Chag Sameach everyone (from Israel).

    in reply to: Turkey – Israel Relations #813574
    Porty
    Member

    It looks to me like Turkey is looking for a reason to attack Israel. That would be a big mistake on their part, but I get the feeling that Erdogan is not the most logical, rational person! I think he is trying to curry favor with his Arab neighbors.

    in reply to: is marring hard ? #801772
    Porty
    Member

    Back to the topic at hand…. 🙂

    It is normal to be nervous – if you were not nervous, something would be wrong. I don’t know where you are, but if you are in Israel, contact me off the boards and I can refer you to someone to talk to before you get married.

    One thing to remember (I am coming up on 18 years of marriage) – try and always think how you would feel if what you just said/did to someone was said/done to you. It can really change your perspective when things get rough (and they will!). Marriage is good, but it is not easy. If you keep that in mind, you will be fine.

    Mazeltov!

    in reply to: Wierd, Great or Interesting Names #799963
    Porty
    Member

    My father’s name is Mendel (in English Emanuel) and he often says that the reason his mother named him Emanuel was that she couldn’t spell automatic! (My father is a funny guy!)

    Porty
    Member

    This is a really tough situation. It seems like the only options are to hurt her feelings and keep your kashrus, or to compromise your kashrus. You could say that your husband/kids/wife/etc. want to spend some quieter Shabboses at home. That way you will get out of going there, but it doesn’t really solve the problem either. The bottom line is that she is going to be hurt one way or another – either by you telling her that you have problems with her kashrus or by avoiding them. Do you have to tell your Rav who it is? Will the Rav definitely figure it out? Do they have a lot of other guests? You may not be the first person who feels this way.

    I have family that stopped covering their hair and I noticed some problems in their kashrus. To keep shalom (and for them not to accuse us of being the “meshugena frummies”), we are very careful with what we eat there. They often have a lot of people over, so we can get away with eating challah and cold cuts and staying away from “problem” foods.

    I hope you can figure this out. Hatzlacha!

    in reply to: Concerned about Arabs in my facebook group #756812
    Porty
    Member

    I agree with yid.period – I think that it should be that only members can see the posts. You might want to consider a blog or newsletter that people can subscribe to. That way they receive an email in their inbox with info and it is not publicly available for everyone to see.

    Just thinking though – if your FB wall is visible to everyone, why would they want to join the group?

    in reply to: Concerned about Arabs in my facebook group #756806
    Porty
    Member

    Are the posts on the group’s page only visible to members? If so, it might be that they are trying to see what’s going on in the yeshiva. You are right to delete/ban them, but maybe make a note of the names in case, Chas V’Shalom, something happens. BTW, what news about Arab/Muslim activity on FB? Is that from the 3rd Intifada page?

    in reply to: dieting #736775
    Porty
    Member

    The new WW program is based on points – every food item besides fruit and some vegetables have a points value. They changed the program recently, so now I would have 29 points per day (as opposed to 21 on the “old” program). You also have 49 points per week that are extra – you can use them or not. The problem is that now every food is more points. For example, a WW bagel used to be 2 points and is now 4. I also found that, keeping kosher, the book they sell you with all the food product point values doesn’t help much as they don’t have a lot of kosher brands in there. You also need a calculator to work out the point value of any item. I just got to the point (no pun intended!) where I can’t write down what I eat forever. I need to find some way to lose weight that I can do for the rest of my life. I have been trying lately to just eat smaller portions, make healthier choices and drink more water (I often find that I am thirsty and mistaking it for hunger), and I am slowly losing weight. I don’t have a lot to lose, but enough. I hope this helps. Good luck.

    in reply to: Web design #738010
    Porty
    Member

    I did take some courses from a “vendor” many years ago, but I have also learned a lot from books (the “Dummies” books give you a good start) and from looking online. A good site (off the top of my head) is http://www.w3schools.com. Hatzlacha!

    in reply to: Mental illness in the frum community- take 2 #732464
    Porty
    Member

    happiest – I think he is! 🙂 It amazes me every day how much he cares about those that have mental illness.

    in reply to: Mental illness in the frum community- take 2 #732453
    Porty
    Member

    Happiest, he helped several people get over their anxiety, depression, etc. A lot of people also don’t want to be “seeing a therapist” when they date, but my husband has spoken to both sides and helped them see that someone who is getting help is someone who is doing the most to make their marriage successful and it is nothing to be ashamed of. There are some very grateful families out there. 🙂

    in reply to: Mental illness in the frum community- take 2 #732450
    Porty
    Member

    My husband is a (mental health) therapist and sees a lot of issues in the frum community. He wants to help Yidden and has been very successful. There is no shame in getting help – it is actually a sign of strength that someone realizes that there is a problem and wants to get help for it. My husband has helped several people get married too.

    in reply to: Places to live outside NY #1035988
    Porty
    Member

    Can I put in a plug for Cleveland, Ohio? It is only 1 hour by plane to NY, has a great community and several (3 Orthodox) schools to choose from. My son is friendly with the son of a local Chabad Rabbi – they live literally around the corner from us and the shul is one block away to the other side of us. Housing is very affordable. When we sold our house about 2 1/2 years ago, we were asking $150,000 and we were told that a similar house in NY would cost around $850,000! There are 4 dairy restaurants (all Cholov Yisroel – one is a drive up pizza place) and 4 meat restaurants, including a kosher Subway. We also have 3 kosher butchers and 2 bookstores. I know that this may seem laughable to those from NY, but for an “out of town” town, it is one of the nicest places to live outside of NY. We moved here about 6 years ago and are happy we did. All the other towns mentioned (Detroit, St. Louis, etc.) are all smaller than Cleveland. Let me know if you want more information. 🙂

    in reply to: "Please Get Outta Here" and other Polite Rudeness #726934
    Porty
    Member

    “Oh, I don’t mind your smoking – it’s your breath that comes behind it!”

    “You know, if someone heard you saying that, they would think that you were being….”

    in reply to: Rebbi Smacking Kids #719602
    Porty
    Member

    I am not against giving a child a potch when needed per se, but when is it needed? Also, how can you tell a parent/rebbe that they can hit a child, but regulate how hard, when and why?

    When could a rebbe hit a child? When the child doesn’t do his homework? When the child talks during class? I don’t see a situation where a rebbe can legitimately hit a child. A lot of teachers do not have control over their kids (in their class), but smacking a child is not appropriate.

    in reply to: Computer Programming #698222
    Porty
    Member

    I don’t know what language you are looking to learn, but I have heard that lynda.com has tutorials on a wide range of subjects (computer related). That might be a good place to start.

    Good luck.

    in reply to: Things Kids Said/Did #1185153
    Porty
    Member

    A friend told me that she heard her one child tell another child that the bracha you say after the bathroom is Borei Nefashos. She told her that you say Asher Yatzar, not Borei Nefashos after the bathroom, to which the child replied, “Yes, but I don’t know Asher Yatzar, so I’m saying Borei Nefashos!”

    in reply to: Funny Shidduch Questions Asked About a Boy/Girl/Family #914035
    Porty
    Member

    A friend of mine said that someone called her about a seminary girl that boarded with her. She said that the woman asked her, “If there was an ice cream with nuts on top, what kind of nut would the girl be?” Hmm… Wonder who the nut is!! LOL

Viewing 18 posts - 1 through 18 (of 18 total)