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aries, how can a kosher donut shop ban employees from bringing in outside food? Will the employees eat donuts and coffee everyday for lunch?
popa, If when following halacha there still remains a vulnerability where people are known to be beating the system on kashrus matters, nothing should be done?
they shouldn’t shmoze, but how’s it different than a guest?
BTW, per the minhag hamokem a Sefardic bochur who is davening in an Ashkenaz Shul shouldn’t wear a Talis, and an Ashkenaz bochur who is davening in a Sefard Shul should wear a Talis. Since everyone davening in that Makom should keep that Makom’s Tefilah-related Minhagim (like wearing a Talis or whether to say Nakdishach instead of Nekadesh -or vice versa- in Kedusha).
Bezalel:
What are the positions of R’ Katzenellenbogen’s kehilla? And how/what do they disagree with Hirsch?
May I suggest that, possibly, the yeshiva told the child that it wasn’t their minhag — but the child misunderstood the instructions as being advised he wouldn’t be yotzei? Just a thought.
Thank you DY.
far vos: It seems to me that you are having a hangup with the semantics. Whether an “older” girl is defined as 22, 24 or 26 is almost irrelevant. That is merely semantics. It is true, as I’ve said above, that the NASI initiative will cause girls to marry at a later age than currently. So, yes, as a result girls may be “looking for a shidduch for a longer period” than they are now — if she starts looking at 18/19 or so she’ll be looking longer since the NASI project will result in girls, on average, getting married later. So if she starts earlier, she’ll be looking longer. That being said, she will be MORE likely to actually find a shidduch and get married than under the current system. This is because with NASI encouraging closer-in-age shidduchim, there will be more available boys. Thus more girls will be able to get married.
Ofcourse: If you must be hatoras nedorim on it, and it isn’t an issue you feel “important enough” to do so, then your stringency of following Cholov Yisroel remains on you.
old man: Just as you are moida that a shul must adhere to the shul’s minhag in havara, so too in the case of the OP’s Yeshiva they are correct for insisting that they adhere to the Yeshiva’s minhag in havara.
far vos: If NASI is successful in its goals, it’ll cause the average age of girls getting married to be older than the current average age of girls getting married. But it won’t cause some of the current younger girls to not have a husband; it’ll just cause them to get married at an older age than they would have under the system as it stands currently.
You wrote: “NASI’s idea will work only if EVERY person marries someone born in the exact same year.”
Actually, all that is needed is for the AVERAGE age gap to be about zero. So one chosson could be 5 years older than his kalla, while another kalla could be 5 years older than her chosson. That would eliminate their being too many girls and too few guys for them to marry. BUT even if that goal is not entirely achieved, but the average age gap is just REDUCED from what it is currently, then it will still cause a lower percentage of girls that won’t have who to marry than the current system causes. Which is an improvement over the current system, even if it doesn’t resolve the problem 100%, it might fix the problem -say- 85%.
midwesterner:
When the Steipler zt’l paskened that one cannot be yotzei with the Sephardic pronunciation, was the Steipler applying his psak only to Ashkenazim or was the Steipler saying even Sephardim are not yotzei with the Sephardic pronunciation?
Thanks
apushatayid: I don’t see how you can argue on basic mathematics. It is a poshut mathematical fact that if the average frum husband is older than the average frum wife, then there will be more unmarried girls than unmarried boys (and, by mathematical definition, some girls will never be able to get married — even though, mathematically, every single boy will be able to get married).
Now, you might argue that the average age of frum husbands is not higher than the average age of frum wives. If you make that argument, you can plausibly say there is no excess of unmarried frum girls compared to unmarried frum boys. But unless THAT is your argument — some husbands are older and equally some wives are older, but on average it is about equal both ways — (and I don’t think anyone will argue that on average age of husbands are not older than the average age of wives), you are essentially positing that 1+1=3.
What are you sad about (on Shabbos or whenever)?
If it weren’t done out of stringency but merely out of convenience, why would she have paid a higher price for the CY? And why would she have avoided it in the city when she had no alternatives (as she indicated she did)?
The photocopies with purple ink were stencils. I last remember them in the late ’80’s. The original would be written on a stencil, and the stencil placed in the machine which would make copies from them.
apushatayid: That’s a side point at best, since cumulatively there are more shidduch-seeking girls of all types than shiddich-seeking boys of all types cumulatively. So you are still short boys and long on girls.
AZ:
If a girl in the new NASI program gets engaged through a shadchan that did not participate in the NASI program, will she get her money back or will it go to the person who made the shidduch (even though he wasn’t part of the program and signed no contract)?
???????
apushatayid: When you write “This is not true” you are arguing against simple mathematics. If there is an average age gap in marriages where the husbands are on average a number of years older than their wives, there will be more unmarried girls in the shidduch market than unmarried boys. This is a mathematical fact in as much as 1+1=2. I’m sure Dr. Pepper agrees with this mathematical fact.
2scents:
What happened that was so disastrous?
At the leatest the child has to find out eventually by bar/bas mitzvah (if they weren’t born Jewish).
apushatayid & Dr. Pepper: What I said in my previous comment is a more accurate assessment of the issue. There are more girls (of all types cumulative) available than guys (of all types cumulative) available. Therefore, your point — as true as it may be — doesn’t get to the root of the problem. Even if the girls would forget all their meshugasim and be willing to marry any ehrlich boy — or even if she would be willing to marry ANY frum boy [and he willing to marry any frum girl] — the problem still exists, as there are more total frum girls in the entire shidduch market than their are total frum boys in the entire shidduch market.
For that reason, also, the shadchanim have no leverage over the boys, and must cater to the boys whims and they can’t do anything about it. The shadchanim have to be afraid the boys will ignore them (while the opposite is the case with the girls), while the boy doesn’t care if the shadchan ignores him.
apushatayid: The guys don’t need those bridges, i.e. the professional shadchanim. Most shidduchim are made via non-professional shadchanim, i.e. family, friends, acquaintances, etc. Even if a guy blacked out every single professional shadchan in the world, he would do just fine in shidduchim. (Additionally, your idea is DOA unless every shadchan agrees to it. Good luck with that.) Remember, there are more girls available than guys available.
Off the top of my head, I seem to remember that a child (i.e. under bar/bas mitzvah) cannot give a possession of his away, but he can own something. (I may be mistaken.)
Dr. Pepper: Yup, it sure does answer my question. Thanks. In a nutshell what you are saying is that the shadchanim engaged in nasty pressure tactics. That is quite outrageous.
It also demonstrates my above point to apushutayid that the shadchanim desperately need the boys while the boys don’t need them. OTOH the girls need the shadchanim. So the shadchanim have no leverage over the boys other than engaging in abusive pressuring tactics.
Dr. Pepper: What compelled you to continue dealing with them? You could have simply refused to communicate with them.
apushatayid: The shadchanim can’t take control because they need the boys, whereas the boys don’t need the shadchanim. There are more girls than boys in the shidduch market, and the shadchanim are desperate for the boys, since they have more girls than boys. On the other hand, the boys are inundated with girls (since there are more girls in the market than boys) so the boys can hangup on the shadchanim and it’ll be the shadchanim coming back on their knees to the boys since the shadchan has so many girls and so few boys. Hence there is no way to dislodge the boys’ side control of the system.
Sam2 and Moderator-42: Your response it correct, yet doesn’t address Shticky Guy’s question. He asked why is it treated differently, and begins on different dates, between EY and CHU”L.
DaasYochid: What alerted you and how did you become aware of this age-gap cause over a decade ago? Was it a new chiddush at the time (to anyone – not you) and was anything done or was it just talk then?
Huh Ika Anuh: cheshbon in English is accounting.
yitayningwut is correct. It is a custom by the Polish and Ukrainian peasants that some Jews from that area copied and brought over with them.
DaasYochid: Which Sefer is your source for the quote regarding Tashlich coming from?
Perhaps it is omitted as a safety precaution.
“Is there a reason that they make these freeze pops in a way that children can’t open them?”
So the children shouldn’t help themselves to the nosh without permission.
“And why are they so small that the kids are asking for another one before you can finish opening the first one for them?”
I find that I need to cut them in half for the younger children, since it’s too big.
WOI: Would you mind sharing the breakdown of how you reach expenses of $8500 a month? Understanding that may help some provide ideas on reducing that, which may be of help to you. You mentioned credit card bills, but what are you using the credit for? How much is your monthly student debt expenses? Do you have credit card interest you pay? What new charges are being accrued monthly?
RSRH: Part of the MO world (i.e. RWMO) do in fact see those issues as going beyond the halachic pale. Hence the RCA’s effective reprobation of the rabba conception. (Same with the dropping of the bracha of shelo asani isha.) And many in the MO world pushed the RCA to go even further than it did, yet were held back by the LWMO influence in the RCA. Demonstrating that even the significant action of the RCA’s statement was less stringent than many in MO believed it should have been.
RSRH: The halachic debate (as you refer to it) over issues such as women’s minyanim, women rabbis (or rabbas), the bracha of shelo asani isha, etc., has in fact been settled. And much like the CJLS those still pushing these points in the opposite direction of how they have been decided are outside the boundaries of acceptability or recognition.
old man: That isn’t correct.