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Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 104 total)
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  • in reply to: Moetzes Denounces Open Orthodoxy #1116599
    oot for life
    Participant

    “This is what happened with the Reform movement – first they were Orthodox, then Conservative, then Reform, then Reconstructive.”

    Just a point of historical correctness. Reform came first then Conservative was a breakaway from them. I believe the various others (and there are some weird ones out there) broke off of conservative.

    in reply to: Sticky situation #1108635
    oot for life
    Participant

    Speak to the Rav, its his shul let him control the decorum.

    in reply to: Seuda at a Bris #1125739
    oot for life
    Participant

    Maybe I’m missing something here. I get why you’re upset about case 1.

    Case 2, he made sure to have special food for you. And you’re upset because someone else put milk in their coffee. I don’t understand.

    in reply to: "Challah Connection" Supports Toeiva Marriage #1089434
    oot for life
    Participant

    Quickly glanced at the website, doesn’t appear to be a frum lady. Nothing that indicates shomer shabbos.

    But they do have a nice section for Ramadan and Eid.

    Let’s not waste our time.

    in reply to: Non religious argument against same sex marriage #1089763
    oot for life
    Participant

    DY, federal government already does that, its called taxes

    in reply to: Is Shabbos too easy #1082948
    oot for life
    Participant

    “Its easy if you’ve grown up with shabbos” youre right its only baalei teshuva who text on shabbos.

    Nor did I ever mention anything about electricity being on, rather the manipulation of it on shabbos

    in reply to: Is Shabbos too easy #1082947
    oot for life
    Participant

    No halachic issue with either timers or shabbos lamp. Rather we have developed devices that make Shabbos into something that’s one step closer to chol. If we want lights on we turn a screen or set timers beforehand. Everyone was outraged over the switch, so I want to know where is the line? Again assuming no halachic issues, hashkafically when do we say this is too much.

    in reply to: Would I be Jewish ? Some orthodox say yes some no #1077280
    oot for life
    Participant

    I’m sorry you have to go through this. The only bit of advise I can offer is find a competent caring Rav and stick with one. Running around trying to find different suitable answers is only going to drive you nuts. Go with one answer, stick with it, and do whatever you need to do.

    in reply to: Moshiach Rumors? #1074808
    oot for life
    Participant

    which grocery store, it makes a difference

    in reply to: Yeshivas that offer time for online college #1072633
    oot for life
    Participant

    Shor Yoshuv in the past had a number of guys attending college in the evenings. As far as learning seriously, he will have to be self motivated, saw a few too many guys fall through the cracks there (this was a long time ago though, I hear changes are in the works).

    in reply to: Wearing an Apple Watch on Shabbos #1063529
    oot for life
    Participant

    as long as we’re talking about watches, why did everyone feel the need to reset their watches yesterday in the middle of shemona esrei waiting for the Sh”Tz to begin. So annoying.

    sorry continue your discussion…

    in reply to: Taivah for movies #1147991
    oot for life
    Participant

    Shopping,

    You can do it. Don’t give up. Its worth it. You clearly know what is right. You can do it.

    in reply to: Must shuls accept everyone? #1050408
    oot for life
    Participant

    And an Alter Yid who made it through the milchama who comes with an oxygen tank? does that also offend your sensitivities for a quiet davening?

    in reply to: Must shuls accept everyone? #1050405
    oot for life
    Participant

    “This hasn’t yet been brought up to our Rav. Knowing the Rav, he probably wouldn’t want to get so involved in something such as this.”

    I think you have answered your question.

    It seems you have a problem with the Rav, not with this guy. Take it up with him.

    in reply to: Hasn't gotten a date #1070282
    oot for life
    Participant

    Living out of town has a few drawbacks this could be included in that list (along with lack of pizza options).

    You listed that “She is pretty, went to a good seminary, dresses well, attends shiurim, and works in a frum office.”

    Is she doing her histadlus? Meeting with shadchanim, going to events, (and here’s the big thing) willing to travel?

    Its tough in shidduchim wherever a person is, but I think like with everything in life you get out what you put in, the more effort the more success.

    in reply to: tzar baalei chaim and the circus #1046138
    oot for life
    Participant

    Eek,

    I’m not really sure what you’re saying. If you didn’t like my question then you don’t have to answer it. I just wanted to know if there were any considerations about going to a circus that I hadn’t heard of. I don’t know what lior posting second has anything to do with it.

    in reply to: West Hempstead #1210715
    oot for life
    Participant

    i think i heard about an aguda opening up

    in reply to: The zebra puzzle, aka "Einstein's riddle" #1042258
    oot for life
    Participant

    this was fun, took me about 15-20min, when do you want the answer posted?

    in reply to: My son is directly disobeying me, advice is much needed. #1041114
    oot for life
    Participant

    why does anyone make leitzanus, they need to boost their own ego at the expense of something else

    in reply to: My son is directly disobeying me, advice is much needed. #1041111
    oot for life
    Participant

    isn’t him naming himself and his son personal information? how’d the mods let this through?

    in reply to: Getting kids to listen to you #1037240
    oot for life
    Participant

    What are we talking about here?

    There are so many factors that go into each individual kid (chinuch al pi darcho). They’re running away from you in the street or they’re not putting the milk back in the fridge? They’re 2 or 22? Sometimes its an issue sometimes its not and a parent needs to know the difference, irrelevant to their own ego (its tough sometimes).

    All that being said, one way, and note it takes time and effort, is for the parents to set a good example. If Mommy treats Totty with respect and Totty does everything right away Mommy asks kids will learn that is the proper way to act. Same goes with parents and in-laws.

    in reply to: Question of names #1036831
    oot for life
    Participant

    i have a name that ends in yud key and once was asked to sign a tanaim at a wedding, the mesader kedushin, a rosh yeshiva, requested that the two of us practice our names on a napkin so i wrote it with a dash, he told me that it wasn’t necessary and to make sure i didn’t do that on the actual tanaim.

    I also believe I once heard a story where someone sent a question to Rav Kanievsky regarding writing a name that contains a shem Hashem. The Rav wrote back a letter that only contained his signature.

    in reply to: Austin,Tx has a great frum community #1029058
    oot for life
    Participant

    Boston, Boston has a great frum community, we just didn’t understand your accent, sorry for the misunderstanding

    you’re right Boston has a lovely Jewish community one of the oldest in the country, although I believe its really centered in Newton, not Boston propper

    in reply to: New York, NY has a great frum community #1028957
    oot for life
    Participant

    is there a pizza store?

    in reply to: What is your favorite out of town community #1028888
    oot for life
    Participant

    is there an eiruv?

    in reply to: Rechnitz – There is no Shidduch Crisis #1043133
    oot for life
    Participant

    Title was intended to get people to read it, his twist is that its not a crisis, rather a catastrophe.

    His heart is in the right place, but money is not going to solve this problem. If it would it would have been done a long time ago.

    Nothing is going to change until people’s attitudes change. Part of this is institutional and part is societal. The age gap is just a symptom treating a symptom without treating the disease won’t cure anyone.

    in reply to: Telling about pregnancy and gender #1027579
    oot for life
    Participant

    Unless you’re having a planned induction or c-section its really for naught. And even in those cases, there are times when a baby boy may not be ready for a bris bzmano.

    There is so much in this world we can’t control no matter how much we know, just sit back and enjoy HKBH’s plans with all the surprises along the way.

    And Daven.

    in reply to: Animal lamina #1063725
    oot for life
    Participant

    panda dad nap

    in reply to: Ending it after 10 dates over text #1027194
    oot for life
    Participant

    I find it interesting two threads by two new users:

    Thread A: Boy saying girl doesn’t like what Rabbi said

    Thread B: Girl saying doesn’t like what Rabbi said about another friend

    hmmmm

    I could be wrong, but it seems as if the two of you are getting input into a personal disagreement from complete strangers… but hey i guess that’s what the coffee room is for

    in reply to: Girl I want to get engaged to wants me to change my Rabbi #1047111
    oot for life
    Participant

    Most of the posters, in my opinion, have already nailed it, figure out exactly what he said and move on from there.

    But I think what also comes into play is where you plan on living. If you’re living in a different local then its really a non-issue because a person for the most part needs a local rav. If you do plan on living close by then its something maybe to be concerned about.

    Definitely not a hakaros hatov issue though.

    in reply to: condeming israel #1024386
    oot for life
    Participant

    wow…

    in reply to: Tznius in our Community #1015885
    oot for life
    Participant

    its bad, its getting hot outside, so it will get worse, but I don’t fault the women, they’re just following what they see gets them attention

    if the husbands gave the wives attention when they’re at home they would have no need to “dress up” like that and go walking down the street

    the rabbis want to yell at someone let them yell at the husbands first

    in reply to: Jews Are Crazy #1015773
    oot for life
    Participant

    because its crazy in todays society to care about modesty or family values

    because its crazy in todays society to not keep up with the latest celebrity gossip

    because its crazy in todays society to believe in something bigger than oneself

    because its crazy in todays society to care for other people unconditionally

    because its crazy in todays society to love your fellow as you love yourself

    because its crazy in todays society to not assimilate and lose who you are

    I am 100% ok to be considered part of this crazy nation, and I daven my children will be as crazy as I am

    in reply to: Awkward kashrus situation – advice? #1002949
    oot for life
    Participant

    Kol hakavod OP

    You shouldn’t have to lower your standards. It is an absolute myth that you cannot be frum out side of nyc. You might have given this yct rabbi the wrong impression though by asking him shailos in the past. I would refrain from doing that in the future otherwise he may view himself as your rav.

    in reply to: Proper hashkafa about Mandela #994598
    oot for life
    Participant

    He was a huge supporter of Arafat, unless you think yasser also wasn’t anti Israel

    in reply to: I hate you all, you big fat jerks #1019678
    oot for life
    Participant

    so why is it out of order?

    in reply to: I hate vegetables #987578
    oot for life
    Participant

    Very loaded question, depends on a lot of other factors: activity level, family history, etc. Despite what fad diets would have you believe just dieting will never translate into a healthy life.

    in reply to: Which sins carry eternal punishment? #977604
    oot for life
    Participant

    rebdoniel,

    I believe you may be missing a nuance in Rav Pinchus zt”l. His statement is in the person doing the act. And geris while an incredible undertaking is not an act of teshuva, rather a new bria. You have done a tremendous thing by following the pintl yid that you had some sheichus to. And although your father, i am sure did a tremendous job raising you and putting you in a position where you were able to make incredible and difficult choices for the good, he committed an aveirah as we all do. But we cannot do teshuva for our parents, each person is responsible for themselves.

    in reply to: Friends being a bad influence #976933
    oot for life
    Participant

    As one of the above posters mentioned I think there needs to be a definition of what a “friend” is, and what being friends with a person entails.

    Each situation must be handled differently and each person should have a Rav or Rebitzen whom he/she can go to in order to seek out advice.

    However, if I may be so bold as to state my opinion. Unless it is going to be clearly detrimental to a person there is no reason to break off an interpersonal relationship. I feel that Baalei Tshuva and FFB alike need to strengthen themselves in emunah to the point that we are not afraid to be friends with people because of their “influence”. We have the light and therefore should be able to push away any darkness that they bring.

    One of the things the world today lacks is people talking to people. Human interaction has been reduced to texts and tweets and anonymous blog posts like this. We have lost the ability to connect properly. To break one of the last remnants because of hashkafic differences is insane. Now of course I am not saying to go to a party, or be mchalel shabbos h”v to maintain a friendship. Each person has the ability to control an aspect of the relationship.

    OP if this is what your rebbeim have told you than I am not one to argue. And especially if you are single it is even more difficult. But please think about the benefits for yourself, for your friends, and for all of klal yisroel.

    in reply to: Nasty virus going around #914306
    oot for life
    Participant

    I am sorry this thread caused argument and discord, that was not my purpose. I was simply trying to alert people to what we were going through at my home for the past couple days as a public service announcement. I had no intention of insulting by misquote anyone in the medical professional. Nor did I intend for individuals parenting and care-giving methods to be questioned. Since the purpose of my OP has become a springboard for disharmony can the mods please close this thread. Thank you, and sorry.

    in reply to: Sensitive infomation to be relayed reagarding shidduchim #899693
    oot for life
    Participant

    bt is probably readily apparent, and i don’t think it should be considered something ‘sensitive’

    speak to a Rabbi, most things come out either over the course of dating, engagement or marriage, so anything one chooses to hide will eventually be known. its just a matter of how damaging that information will be after x amount of time. The other side is how painful and damaging it is to hide information from the person you are supposed to be sharing your life with

    in reply to: Rosh Hashana Sefer #896732
    oot for life
    Participant

    thanks for all the suggestions, I appreciate it

    in reply to: Tzniut Glasses #892167
    oot for life
    Participant

    But the internet is not at a distance!

    If it was a joke it just goes to prove the media will publish anything without fact checking.

    If it is not a joke then people should be able to wear jean skirts and it will be on the people offended by it to wear the glasses.

    I see it as win win, people taking responsibility for their yetzer. And if its a joke, eh, it only shows what we already know about the media

    in reply to: Who says above knee osur #1022249
    oot for life
    Participant

    but if someone makes pants that aren’t form fitting wouldn’t they just be men’s pants?

    in reply to: Reform scarf "talisim" #889402
    oot for life
    Participant

    I know the Judaica store in every place I’ve ever lived has sold items that aren’t quite kosher. Kiddush cups not a revis, washing cups with spouts, “tallises”, klapim from who knows where, it is on the buyer to know these things. If they say tihs is kosher litchatchila then there could be an issue.

    As far as bashing reform Jews, they do a lot of stuff wrong. They don’t know better. I’m going to give our friend here the benefit of the doubt that he is BT, other wise why would he be in a reform shuls bathroom on YK? Because if he were to just be making up things thats just richilus.

    in reply to: Is it possible to be happy in a job you hate #880756
    oot for life
    Participant

    Happy means that I don’t dread going in everyday. I am happy when I can sit and learn, or when I can play with my children. I’m not looking to be excited about work, I think very few are, I just don’t want to feel as if I picked the wrong path in life.

    I can’t really look to change jobs, I put a lot of money and a lot of schooling into this profession, to do anything else would be to start over from scratch. Even a different field with in the profession would mean starting over, at least monetarily, if I could even get hired.

    Baruch Hashem, I am very happy in my life. I just fear that the weekly grind of work may be starting to take its toll on the other, more important aspects of life.

    in reply to: Friend-less #881264
    oot for life
    Participant

    We invite people over for Shabbos, generally speaking one meal is family and one meal is guests (or eating out). This gives people a chance to sit and talk. We’re not best friends with everyone we’ve had over, but I now have people to shmooze with in shul and I know my wife trades recipes and talks about the kids with them during the week even if its only for a few seconds.

    in reply to: Is it possible to be happy in a job you hate #880746
    oot for life
    Participant

    Thanks guys I really needed the chizuk. How does everyone make sure that their dissatisfaction at work doesn’t carry over to their home life?

    in reply to: Early Shabbos #1145423
    oot for life
    Participant

    I believe RT is referring to when to when the husband is mekabel Shabbos early. If you are taking Shabbos in normal time, you are able to light closer to shkia although it is still not suggested if it can be avoided.

    in reply to: Early Shabbos #1145411
    oot for life
    Participant

    mommamia – i duplicated your google search to find what you read. The opening line of the Rav’s article is slightly misleading but if you continue reading he explains why he says this. The *shul* and all those davening there will have accepted Shabbos no later than five min. after plag, therefore if your husband is davening there he would have already accepted for you (and family and guests) therefore lighting later than this will be mechallel Shabbos. This article is only written with regard to their shul. I suggest seeking out a LOR.

Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 104 total)