Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Music reaches deep down into our neshamas and touches chords that sometimes remain untapped. I know that certain pieces wil ALWAYS elicit tears when I hear them. Perhaps there is a subconscious association with the music, or the instruments being played, or the subject matter of the songs. When I hear the music from Les Miserables, particularly when Valjean sings “Bring him home…” I am a puddle of goop. Jewish music likewise affects me, especially the Im Eshkacheich that was sung at my daughter’s chasunah.
Syag, I am so sorry for the tzaar you and your family went through.
Oomis- unless you’re a member of the Greengrocer’s Guild- then it’s all seriou’sly.
(See, OOM? Back in the game!) “
I beg your pardon??? What?????????? I am not One Of Many… In any case, I didn’t quite understand what you posted – could you explain your point, please?
Sippy cup or cup with built in straw are the best options. A baby could find a real straw to be a choking hazard. BTW, Syag, you probably have very advanced babies, bli ayin hara, but every baby I have ever seen takes the cup and turns it upside down at the age at which you think they should be drinking from a cup. Perhaps with someone HOLDING the cup for them, they can be slowly taught, but on their own, most will toss the cup around. That’s why I never gave anything BUT water in a regular cup. Sippy cups are a good transition from the bottle, if the baby is bottle fed, and the cup with the built in straw works well, too.
DON’T give a baby a juice box with that tiny straw.
If there is no dairy ingredient LISTED and no allergy warning, then the items might be pareve, but should not be eaten with fleishigs. You need to check with the OU on each item.
gefen, I totally got what you were saying. Who are we to say it was NOT a siman from Ayala O”H or even from Hashem, to let her family and friends know she was present? When my father O”H was niftar, we had MANY such simanim throughout the shiva, things that could ONLY be associated with him and no one else. If this gave any comfort to the aveilim, I certainly would not want to burst their bubble by making light of it.
What a tragedy!
Your and you’re are two pet peeves of mine. I also notice quite often that people write loose (meaning not tight), when they mean LOSE (as in, where oh where can my car keys be?). ALSO, and goodness knows I really do not mean to sound critical, but I have seen this error repeatedly. It’s = it is. “Its” without an apostrophe, is the possessive non-gendered form for “belonging to.” Too often people will write the former when they mean the latter.
I wouldn’t say these errors make my bones twitch, but I do notice them…
And before too long there will not be many people davening in ANY shul. (You WERE kidding, of course…)
Never heard of such a thing, and where did you chance upon such a service?
Not at all! 🙂
How about “Things not to say to your Shviger?”
LevAryeh, your What not to Say on a Shidduch Date STILL has me ROTFL. I think I met ALL those guys 40 years ago.
Miritchka, fair enough.
When I get the opportunity – watching the ocean waves, which really relaxes me. Going with my grandchildren to the amusement park or aquarium and seeing the wonder in their eyes. Family bbqs rate high on that list, and we don’t don’t BBQ often, so I really appreciate them.
technically it is. If it was cracked who would have to fix it? you or the city? if someone fell on your front sidewalk – who would they sue – you or the city? YOU – it is your responsibility – there is nothing wrong with kids coloring with chalk with comes off with rain!! “
FTR, it depends on WHY it cracked. If it is just cracked, stam, yes you the homeowner could be responsible for the repair. BUT – if the crack was caused by a City tree whoe roots were forcing the sidewalk upward, the City of NY is totally responsible. We just (after a four year battle with bureacracy), got our sidewalk AND our driveway repaired (yes, they had to repair our driveway because THEIR tree roots grew under it and broke it badly all over, so we could not even get into our driveway for years). it was battle to get them to act, but in the end it was their tree, their fault, and I told them I was advising people to sue them if they fell. I painted the areas that were broken with yellow bus paint, just to make it obvious there was sakana there, but it was nevertheless not my responsibility from a legal point. The City finally acknowledge their achrayus. And now I can park safely and walk safely, and push the baby carriage easily. A mechayeh.
Gam Ani. i don’t even open the threads. They hurt my eyes.
Member
Oomis
You make it sound like all a husband is good for is to be the other party in bringing you children and einiklech. So basically if science found a way to work around that then you wouldn’t need a husband. Fantastic. Besides not everyone has children right away so until that happens the husband can’t make his wife happy? “
Hmm.. I don’t THINK I was implying that… but the question was about a husband making his wife happy, and these are the things that have made me happy in life, as a direct result of being married to my wonderful husband. The FIRST thing that made me happy was MARRYING him. The rest followed in sequence, and enhanced the happiness he already was giving me from the first day we met. And the happiness I feel would not be complete without him by my side.
You are right, not everyone has children right away, and the husbands can nonetheless make their wives feel happiness. I was describing MYSELF!!!!!!!!!! AND I was describing the INCREASED happiness I felt with each new stage of life.
My toothbrush. Otherwise, life is an open book in my house.
and I will never forget the moment when I bumped into the ba’al tzedakah in the “cut fruit” section!! A luxury, for sure, but it helped me stay on my diet. Immediately, this intuitive tzadik said to me, “These things make our lives much simpler,”(or similar to that) and disappeared!! That is the kind of person whom we should emulate in cases like this.”
(Welcome back, Eclipse). That IS the kind of person we should emulate, you are right. People need to be sensitive to not only the financial, but emotional upheaval in someone’s life when they are low on funds. If they took the money and went to Belmont, I would feel differently,though.
No question. Ronald Reagan. He was a true statesman. My only disagreement with something he did was when he went to Bitburg.
WIY – I was happy when I got married. I was even more happy when I had my children. I was even HAPPIER when I married off a couple of my children (still 3 to go), and happier STILL when they gave me aineklach. The happiest moment in my life thus far, was when my aineklach, each in turn, called me “Bubby,” and held their arms out to me to hold them. Ain’t nothing like that feeling in the world (without including the obvious goes without saying idea that Hashem and Torah make us most joyful). So my husband is responsible in a very material way for all that happiness.
Re: they might need bandaids or Tylenol… I leave those out also on the bathroom sink, just in case. No one should be going through your cabinets. And for those who have admitted to doing so, it is a real temptation, and I hope you can stop, because you are invading someone else’s privacy when they did a chessed for you. Hakoras hatov alone, is a good reason not to do so, if nothing else.
LevAryeh – love your work!
Unless he has a woman in labor in the car or another emergency, he is rude, thoughtless, and potentially could cause an accident. There is NO justification for him, just because he is in a hurry. So is everyone else.
This is a very tough one. You may not be privy to what is going on in their lives, so what you deem a normal income, may NOT be enough to cover emotional needs of which you are unaware. I will give you an example.
Someone makes on paper what appears to be a decent income, not well-off, but not poverty stricken, either. The family cannot afford to go on vacations EVER, or fix up their home, and such. But they CAN afford to go out to eat once a week. Someone remarked to me that if they wouldn’t go out, they might have enough money for those other things. But their going out is what keeps them from feeling like paupers on a regular basis. Are they managing their money the best way? Maybe not, but it is not our business to judge.
If you don’t feel comfortable giving them money, for the reasons you mentioned, then you probably shouldn’t. If you will resent them, it diminishes the chessed. It might be a great thing to find a money management class of some kind and mention that are going to it to help yourself with your own money issues because you feel you could learn some helpful tips for yourself, and would they be interested in joining you. Get a few couples together, so they don’t feel it is directed at them personally. Maybe this could be done in someone’s house, with a nice collation. In my opinion, that would possibly get the point across without singling them out. You could even tip off the speaker to address certain issues in a roundabout way v’hamyvin yavin (hopefully). JMO.
BTW, I totally understand where you are coming from on this. I know someone who used to be wealthier and now is not, but who continues to spend money on things I (and most people, I would bet)consider to be unnecessary (weekly manicures, waxing, etc), as she did when money was readily flowing. This comes out to hundreds of dollars each month, that could be saved. But maybe that’s what she needs to keep from feeling poor.
Everyone has a different view of what constitutes nosiness (and Pinocchio is not a good example, because he is iconic for liars, whereas some very honest people can be nosy). I have a friend who feels people are being intrusive when they ask how her married children are doing. I think she holds a very extreme view. Some people find very ordinary questions (how are you, did you have damage from Sandy, is that a new dress?)to be very offensive. I think they have a problem. There is privacy and then there is Howard Hughs.
I think you are too bothered. it’s not grafitti, and it washes away. When I was growing up, you couldn’t FIND a sidewalk without potsy squares chalked in.
OR – and it’s just a thought – she could influence YOU to be less frum? Hmmm… isn’t that one of the reasons that a child born of a non-Jewish WOMAN is not Jewish (because the religion of the mom influences the household?)
Chanie, OY!
When you say funniest, you mean creepiest, right?
Anyone who would snoop in a medicine cabinet deserves to be shot”
Yes, I do, it is really nasty. And while I don’t hold the extreme punishing view you espoused, I say it serves ’em right, when they get caught red-handed. A little like the blue dye-pack on bank money when it is stolen.
The funniest thing is when someone snoops in the medicine cabinet and everything falls out!
Nice p’shat, Sam. Even nicer that you are in such good company as the Ksav Sofer. Yasher koach.
I agree with the OP. Obviously it’s their house, they have that right, blah blah blah, but it’s clear he was only trying to find his room and if it had been open he would have glanced in, noticed it was the wrong room, and kept looking. And I just think it’s a little bizarre. Like, what are they hiding? Why are they so suspicious?”
JF, do you not think they showed him where he would be staying? No one lets someone into their home without showing them/indicating by note/or having someone else show them where they will be sleeping. I even set out hot cups, bottled water, instant coffee or tea, and my husband who gets up for the Hashkama minyan, puts out milk, sweetener, paper goods and plastic ware, so they have what they need for a hot drink and don’t need to look for it. I leave some cookies or danish, in case someone needs to eat SOMETHING before they go to Shul, as is sometimes the case. And that is WHEN I am at home, in case they get up before I do, so they don’t have to look for anything. I would not let anyone stay by me, if I were not in my house, for exactly the reason that our OP demonstrated.
Rebdoniel, with all due respect – if you are kind enough to allow someone to use your home when you are not there (or even if you are), it is INDEED a violation of their trust, to enter rooms that are not permitted to you. Perhaps these Jews were already burned once or twice by people whom they trust and who likewise violated that trust. Nothing creepy about their locking their doors.
We were asked to host three bochurim for a Shabbaton in our neighborhood, as a favor to a local rebbie. Two of them were extremely ill-mannered and apparently brought up in a barn. But the worst part was when they invited SIX other boys into my home without our knowledge or permission. I heard noises while I was trying to nap on Shabbos, and came down to find these bar-mitzvah age boys jumping off my couch and playing ball with any handy objects in the room. I asked them why they were not at their program and told them to leave immediately. We never told the rebbie (we should have, we know, but didn’t want to get them in trouble), but I learned a valuable lesson.
How on earth did you discern that the doors were locked, unless you tried to open them?
I have a couple of people whom I know personally here IRL, one who is a very dear friend.
If someone were genuinely concerned that he was being “un-frum” to remove a hat and jacket in sweltering heat, then I would be even more concerned that he has no clue as to what constitutes frumkeit. However, it was clear int his post that the poster was writing just a tad tongue in cheek.
A frum woman whom I know, was on the show and won the first day and did ok on the second. I doubt they gave her any problem about the taping. They surely tape during the week also. It’s way in advance.
I have a sugar problem, so if I would feel ill on a minor fast, I would break it on a small amount of food and then continue fasting. Somehow, I have B”H never had any problem fasting on Yom Kippur or Tisha B’Av (so far, bli ayin hara). But for some reason, the minor fasts are a challenge, though most often, I manage to get through the entire day without breaking it.
This topic, for one thing…
Is “kol kevuda bas melech pnimah” HALACHA, or is it an hashkafic observation expressed by Chazal as their opinion about women? Is there any halacha that states women may not go outside, gather in public places, etc., or is it the feeling by our Chachomim that this is what is best for women? And does “pnimah” necessarily mean literally inside (the house)?
Health, with all due respect – There is a chiyuv for a woman to be the akeres habayis, to raise the next generation of Torah-observant Jews, and to be an eizer k’negdo for ehr husband. That does not mean they have a chiyuv to do both their own job AND his. And if for whatever reason it seems you don’t feel that what a Stay at Home Wife/Mom does is work, you have no clue about how much harder it is, than to be out in the workforce. I do however, agree with your point that there is little parnassah in the home, hence they often need to go out to work to get PAID. But don’t try to find a Gemorah that APPLAUDS a woman neglecting her home responsibilities. Our grandkdis are being raised by nannies, more often than not NON-Jewish ones. That cannot be a GOOD thing.
I think had she said it on TV, it would warrant censure. But, as you point out, it was three decades ago, and I defy any of the people who are now involved in firing her to show that they have NEVER said a pejorative expression about anyone. Or is it only ok if it’s about Jews?
147: And what do you say back when the politician says, “That’s nice for you, but I don’t beliebe in God”?
And what do you say to the gay person who says, “Yeah? Well, G-d Created me this way.” Personally I have no answer for that, other than the fact that we all have an achrayus to live a morally correct life as defined by the Torah (and that includes non-Jews). And IF it is so that Hashem created people to be attracted to their own gender, that is no different from Hashem creating the rest of us with a moral imperative to live a chaste life.
Many straight people sadly never get married. Are they not expected to live according to the Torah? Do we throw out everything, because of our taavos, whether or not we are straight, gay, married, or not? Hashem told us what he expects of us. For some of us the challenges and yetzer hara are especially difficult. I feel tremendous compassion for people who are in this awful nisayon, but marriage is already defined by Hashem, and we have gone down a slippery slope in too many states already. Call this legal relationship between the same gender couples whatever you wish (except “married”)and treat them LEGALLY as married couples. But I cannot think of them as married. What’s next – a man can marry his beloved Fido? To quote the Wicked Witch of the West, “What a world, what a world…!”
It gives a wonderful creative outlet to girls. I LOVED being in my high school play. I remember having to ad lib two lines on separate occasions, because the girls who had to feed me the lines either froze on-stage momentarily, or said the wrong line, and I needed to bring the dialogue back to where it was supposed to be. That was an absolute BLAST! When I went off stage, my teacher hugged me. I felt as though I had just hit a home run with bases loaded.
Cover with the lid, but keep slightly off, so it vents, otherwise it could pop off forcefully during the microwaving.
ITA. We can always express a different opinion, but the poster with whom we disagree should never be disrespected and belittled.