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Stack your sheets & waterproof pads on the crib so when the baby wets during the night, all you have to do is pull off the wet, and you will have a dry layer. (I and my daughters’ do 5 layers at a time.)’
First of all, b’shaa tova in good health!!! Second, the advice above is a good suggestion (works great for Yom Tov meals and changing disposable tablecloths, too). However, if you have a really good diaper (don’t look to be thrifty when it comes to diapers, especially for a newborn), it will not be an inyan where the sheet is constantly getting wet. It is far more likely that the baby might spit up, then actually wet the sheet from the other end.
Most important advice of all (and like most new moms, myself included back in the day, you probably won’t follow the advice), SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS.
My grandparents came from Ukraine/Russia/Poland. My mother was born here after her mother came to the USA from Lithuania and met and married my Zaydie who was from Poland.
I want to know if you think that one is meant to unconditionally love their spouse”
This is a good question. I think that one ideally should love one’s spouse unconditionally UNDER REASONABLE CIRCUMSTANCES, meaning that the spouse is not being physically and/or emotionally abusive, and that the spouse is upholding the reasonable expectations of being that spouse. Unconditional LOVE is good. Unconditional TOLERANCE (of bad behavior, dishonesty, abuse, untruthfulness,substance abuse etc.) is NOT. You can love someone, but hate some of their actions.
It was Socrates who was given hemlock (I believe), and drank it, rather than face death by his enemies. Either way, ewwwww!
Correct me if I am wrong, but wasn’t the Rambam interested in the philosophical works of Aristotle?
It really depends on the question. If the question is something like, “Why does that lady look like she swallowed a watermelon?” It probably is a good time to tell your child about the evils of making personal comments.
Truthfully, you really have to make a quick assessment of the question, time, and place, and decide in the moment what the right approach might be. There is no one-size-fits-all answer here.
I have a tendency to be a bit acid-tongued occasionally (in case you hadn’t noticed)”
What??? YOU?????? Nah, not EVER….
The actual line was “don’t kiss your grandfather,” but thanks, anyway. 🙂
But the actual translation SHOULD be Zaydies (more than one) should not kiss me… 🙂
A Jew is a Jew, good, bad, or indifferent. Af al pi…
Re post by oomis that begins “I’ve never met a guy who …”: oomis asks “who will know” if a bochur who leaves yeshiva to work is not putting any time into learning? Well, Dayan Emmes will know, and so will the bochur. I hope oomis is not saying that she does not believe that yeshivas are not doing their job in getting their students into the habit of life-long learning, or if she is, I hope she is wrong.”
My “who will know” was a rhetorical question, guys. Relax. I was simply saying that some people are apparently afraid that if boys leave Yeshivah’s full time learning, they will somehow never make regular time to learn (and from the boys’ standpoint, who could really know for certain, EXCEPT for themselves and Hashem?).
nfgo3, I was not in any way, shape or form, saying what you inferred from my post. I was expressing my belief that it is sad that there are people who fear that a boy will stop learning once he leaves the Yshivah. If a Yeshiva AND a boy’s family have both done their job, that should not happen.
Could be a drone, and if so, lucky you, to be alive.
you all seem to think it’s funny but this really keeps me up at night. My six year old likes to make her own pony tail so it always looks messy, kind of like a six year old did it. How will I EVER get a shidduch for my other kids if she walks around in public like that!”
Syag, I wince when I see the way some little kids dress or comb their hair. But I also shep nachas, when I realize they did it on their own, and are asserting their independent thought. As long as it is not an issue of a dress code or such, or not a boosha to Shabbos or Yom Tov, we learn to pick and choose our battles. And as they say, just “let it go, let it go.”
I asked the shailah and was told you are allowed to attend EVEN IF YOU HOLD by a different minhag.
Popa, mazel tov on your unrelated simcha. Whether or not the story is true, I DO think the chosson’s father should be there. In the kallah’s house, the Shabbos before the wedding is all about Shabbos Kallah. There is absolutely no reason why a father should be home to spend Shabbos with a gazillion of his daughter’s friends in the house with her. But it certainly shows that he attaches chashivus to his future aidem’s simcha by being present, if possible, at the auf ruf. I wouldn’t travel out of the country for it, though, if I were the girl’s dad.
I would love to have a dog, but several family members are allergic and/or afraid of them. And yes, Shabbos is a holy day, BUT I have known some dogs who seemed to be holier than some people with whom I am acquainted. As Tzaar baalei chaim is a chiyuv, and dogs cannot legally be left off-leash in many places, they require being walked on Shabbos. My parents O”H had a dog very late in life (I think I recounted that story once before, and won’t do so now), and he was their fierce protector, utterly loyal devoted to all of us, loving, and intuitive when something was wrong. How many people can have that said about them???
oomis, the only mention of teeth is as part of an idiom”
Well, duuuuuuuhhhhhh! 🙂
Word to the Weissgardenfeld family. BOLO on the Bochur.
The only thing I can think about related to both child-rearing and (possibly) dentistry is what we see in the Haggaddah regarding the Wicked Son.
I personally don’t care for it, though it is a real convenience when you need to reach someone quickly and cannot talk on the phone. However, I think all these e-communications, whether by IM, e-mail, or text, have completely taken the place of real and meaningful conversation and dialogue between two people, to the point where many young people do not know how to talk to each other in complete sentences, if at all, anymore. Nor do they believe that it is even necessary.
It also does nothing for our spelling and grammatical skills. I do see the plus side, but I am concerned with the negative aspect.
If you build a blog, they will come.
My baby bro once convinced me to bite into a jalapeno, claiming it wasn’t sharp at all. He even put one in his mouth and ate it to prove it to me. When I stupidly followed suit, I thought I would NEVER be able to talk again; my entire mouth had been burnt away, as far as I was concerned. I later discovered he had swallowed his rather small jalapeno, whole. Thus he avoided the heat of the pepper. I hope he had heartburn later…I am biding my time, but I will get him back for that one. It’s been 40 years, and he will never see me coming…
Not intentionally, I ASSURE you(haaarrrumph!). 🙂
Thanks Kapusta, but I am not certain it is considered an egg-free sub for allergy purposes. I needed egg REPLACER for Pesacyh. we primarily used apple sauce and/or potato starch, but the results were so-so.I will just daven really hard for my yingeleh to outgrow his allergy before the next Pesach (or better yet, Shabbos).
Why wouldn’t you extend that to non frum people and even non ehrliche people? Is it possible for us to know what another’s nisyonos are?”
Ok, I will accept your point.
Why wouldn’t you extend that to non frum people and even non ehrliche people? Is it possible for us to know what another’s nisyonos are?”
Ok, I will accept your point.
Nope, sorry. But I DO like to be on time or even early for everything… Does that make me an honorary member?
According to your own approach, we shouldn’t view ourselves as superior to a non frum or non ehrliche Yid either.”
Please re-read what I posted. I never said or implied that whatsoever. In the case of someone non-ehrliche whether outwardly observant or not, I do think that person is of low-quality and a phony. Someone who is non-frum can only be judged properly by Hashem. It is not typically for us to make assumptions about that person, particularly if in all respects he is a mensch. Though he may be lacking in an aspect of his Avoda, so is the person who davens with a minyan three times a day, learns yomam v’layla, follows every possible chumrah, and then lies and cheats to get undeserved food stamps, or other benefits of stealing (yes, STEALING) from the government, or who commits other acts of Chillul Hashem. Neither Jew is fully doing his avoda. We just tend to look the other way when it is someone who otherwise appears frum.
There are all kinds of superior actions and inferior ones. It behooves us to leave the cheshbon to the Only One Who actually Knows our hearts, to decide if we merit such nomenclature as “Superior Jew.” Most of us are pretty beinoniyim in lots of areas, and could do with some improvement. I know that I could, for certain. I think that a superior person, never believes him/herself to be so. He or she is always reaching to be better and do better. I know that sounds hokey, but it’s how I feel.
In our house, we have another chumra . We hide beer since that is the only thing that is certainly chometz. Then we drink it.”
Hope you blow out the bedikah candle first!
Why must we choose? Have both!
No one but Hashem knows His cheshbonos. I think it is time for ALL of us to be a little less arrogant about who is a better Jew and who is superior. The poshuteh Yid might be sitting right next to the Rosh Yeshivah in Olam Haba, for reasons known only to Hashem. We can only do the best we can do, and always strive to do better.
But “better” is a matter of opinion SOME of the time. One person might feel it means the person uses a “better” hashgocha or goes to a “better” yeshivah. Someone else might feel it means to be a better human being, doing more chessed, donating of oneself, not only of one’s money.
If you buy a more expensive esrog, that does not make you a better Jew. It just means you were B”H able to afford to buy it. Other people might choose to use that additional money (assuming it is not available off a money tree)to give to someone else to be able to afford to buy ANY esrog, much less a gorgeous Hidur Mitzvah one (and I KNOW the wealthier people ARE giving tzedaka, too, but it is so much easier for them to do so than for someone who has a little less in their wallet, and we do, after all, believe that lifum tz’arah agrah). Everything is relative.
Our actions and sincerity make us better people, not the shul in which we daven, the chumros we adopt, the lateness of our sedarim. But again, only Hashem Knows how to credit us for all of that. Hashem gave us the mitzvos in order to make us better people and better Jews. I believe that the second we view ourselves as superior to another FRUM and ehrliche yid, we already demonstrate that we are not. Just one gal’s opinion.
Gefilte fish is indeed authentically Jewish, to prevent people from taking bones out of fish on Shabbos. Everything was ground up together and made into balls and boiled. And nowadays I also like to take thawed gefilte fish loaves, mix in an egg, some sugar, grated carrots, and onions, and bake them in colorful layers, alternating whitefish and salmon (to which I add some chrein to make it more obviously pink). Sometimes I will add frozen spinach to the white gefilte fish, to speckle it. I put it in a small wide loaf pan and bake it for about an hour at 350 until the top is golden-browned.
When in the mood, I marbleize the two fish mixtures together, by putting large alternating scoops of fish in the pan and then running a knife through them. It looks SO pretty and tastes delicious. To serve in a really pretty and functional way,cut the ends off an unpeeled cucumber and then cut across the width into thirds (or fourths,depending how long the cuke is) and hollow out a nice hole in each section, not cutting all the way to the bottom. Fill the hole with chrein, chreyonnaise, or mayo, and serve on the side of each plate.
DK – show me the source for the issur d’Oraisa. Is it possible that some really gevaldig and heilige rabbonim somehow MISSED that makor?
How do those who dont eat Gebroachs eat Korech. Between the Juice on the Lettuce and the Wine/Grape Juice on the Charoset, The Matza is bound to get wet “
Not a problem if eaten quickly, before it has a chance to ferment.
My understanding is that they did not leave Mitzrayim until the next morning. SO how did they NOT have enough time to make bread? I think we eat matzah because Hashem Said to eat matzah.
1:15 and 1:30 AM respectively, and that was because we had two elderly people with us and were cognizant that it was a tircha for them to be up much later than that. So we kept many of the Divrei Torah for the lunch meals. We did indeed finish our kosos on time, and I drink a full kos each time. It did NOT help me to sleep better…
chazarah comes from the root of “chazer”– “pig”.
If you want to chazer correctly, you need to do it like a pig, and grab every moment you can.
I just read this for the first time – I think it’s a terrific analogy!
MAZEL TOV!!!!!!! Always remember WHY you married each other, even when you might be annoyed about something (and everyone gets annoyed SOME time). Never take each other for granted, even when you ARE taking each other for granted (because that’s just what we do). Make time to “date” each other AFTER you are married, and especially after you BE”H have children.
I love gefen (I especially love saying a Borei Pri Hagefen…) Pesachdig tuna for some reason is just awful (makes no sense that this is so, but it is). In general, I find Gefen products and/or Haddar are excellent.
btw schnitzel is an israeli Zionist food “
I always thought Schnitzel is a German food of long ago. Silly moi.
I thought this thread was ,”If at first you don’t succeed..” to which I was about to reply, “Don’t take up sky diving.”
What I call matzah brei and what others call it, seem to be two different things. I never soaked matzah in water, then mixed it with eggs and fried it, then sprinkled it with sugar. We always just took large pieces of matzah, broke them into hand-sized pieces (not too small), and put them in a frying pan with a little oil, then poured beaten eggs over the mztzah, added a little sprinkle of salt, and browned it on each side. It is the ONE and only thing (besides my charoses with Matzah, which I cannot make with nuts this year) that I get a craving for on Pesach. because of my grandson’s allergy, I will wait until chol hamoed to have some, when they go home and it will be safe to cook eggs again.
I need kugels, side dishes and a nosh or two that can be egg and nut free.
No contest – 8:45 AM Monday through Thursday, because that is when my daughter brings my precious nearly two year old ainekel over. The look on his face when he yells BUUUUUUBBBY and holds his arms out to me to pick him up, are minutes that I wouldn’t trade for a lottery win!
Gefen?
oomis, i hold u in high regard but to say that noone does anything wrong is living in a fairytale.”
Oyoyoy, I appreciate being held in high regard by nice people. I did not, however, say what you apparently understood me to say.
Of course people do things wrong at times. My point was that sometimes people who are machmir on themselves THINK that someone is doing wrong, when al pi Halacha he is NOT, ebcause that person’s chumrah has come to take the place of the actual Ha;acha as it was given.
We ALL do wrong. I do, you, do, even Moshe Rabbeinu did. And that is because ONLY Hashem is perfect in His Tzidkus. But when I don’t know for sure what the right thing to do is, I ask a shailah. People who are machmir SOMETIMES (and please note I am not saying this is across the board true of ALL machmirim), look at people who follow the Halacha but are not machmir lifnim meshuiras hadin, as not being really frum Yidden. That is a divisive and elitist view, and can lead to machlokess,
Keep in mind, I also want to be able to serve some of the food to an allergic almost two year old.
BTW, ladyfingers I believe are made with eggs, but in any case, they may have traces of nuts or are produced in a nut processing facility – it was how we discovered my granddaughter was allergic many years ago.
Thanks, YEshivahguy, Kapusta, and 2N13 for your suggestions! Have a wonderful Shabbos and yom tov.
FYI: I met Mordy today and he told me that there are some Rabbonim in Flatbush who are pressuring him not to publish ANY of my letters, period”
OR – perhaps THEY can refrain fromr eading the letters. it will do wonders for their blood pressure (speaking of pressure). Personally, I look forward to your columns weakly…er…weekly. Have a great Shabbos and and even better Pesach.