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ROB are a man or a woman? Why are insisting that the women have to dance? If you are a woman then dance, it doesn’t affect us. If you are a man then I think the women who want to dance can defend themselves, although I don’t know any who do.
So it is like being sent to the principals office! 😉
Oh no am I in trouble now?
Sberger I don’t think anythings wrong with that as long as it done with good intentions.
The OU never marks DE only the OK and maybe others.
Its probably like avocado or olive oil, healthy with moderation.
Wow mazca!
Mazal I heard that you are allowed to use your own hair. Maybe there are different opinions.
Really squeak?!600 how do you do it? You probably make everything from scratch!
Wow and I was complaining!
But no good pizza here.:(
Whenever we go to the states our first stop is the pizza store!
Well I was once in a Muslim country and it was so funny because the ladies were wearing religious store jean skirts! And our guide was explaining to us all about the different levels of “tznius” of the women.
This is funny! You guys live in the kosher food capital of the world! Try surviving in a city with 6 kosher restaurants, and going to the supermarket not even knowing what’s kosher because most products don’t have the hechsher on the label. You have to check a list that’s always changing the status of its products, oh and whenever we see an American product with a hechsher (in costco or wal mart) we buy it even if we don’t need it.
But why am I complaining? Don’t worry you get used to it, and I guess its not that bad!;)
I think some Hishtadlut can be done, for example, the girl should be dressed nicely, parents can keep their eyes open and if they see someone that they like for their child they. Should find a way to move the shidduch….
But its only minimal it really is all from Hashem.
I didn’t know 80 was baal hatosfot! I thought he/she was kapusta!!;)
My husband likes it when I ask him these type of questions, he really has a good head, ba’h.
I asked my husband for the answer. 😉
Oh I just remembered another point about labels and why people would label themselves. I was know someone who is orthodox but is not religious, they hide behind the label of “not religious”, for example they say “oh you can’t eat that, its not kosher but I can, I’m not religious” uh… Isn’t it the same torah?
I guess its a sad reality that people make you feel old when your not , but it depends a lot on your circles.
There should be mingling events for singles, and maybe once a couple meet and like each other they’ll realize that their whole list of requirements is unattainable; and they’ll get married!
Forget about professional shadchanim, I do not know one person where I live that got married by a pro shadchan. Guy sees girl, guy finds out about girl, guy sends a middleman to ask girl if interested, if yes guy calls girl and they go out. If they want to continue he calls her again,
I am talking about very religious people here. Its not flawless, its actually pretty complicated but at least its a little more realistic.
Hello! 🙂
Yes AZ, that would definitely solve everything. Why don’t guys just go out with girls that they like?
The daat zekenim says that even if he would kill in the future his punishment would be with the sword not sekila?
The answer is because he doesn’t listen to his parents and that’s considered cursing them, the punishment for cursing the parents is sekila. So he is being punished for this sin. Baal tosfot.
I think I understand what cherrybim is on to, it’s actually a very good point.
So part of being tzanua has a lot to do with behavior….
everyone also wants a “cookie cut out” type of guy, whoever your frieds and siblings marry might not always work for you. Parents are also ashamed sometimes to let their children go out with someone who could be a very good match, but not someone they expect, because they want prestige.
When we start labeling ourselves and eachother the goyim have to remind us that no matter what, your Jewish.
In the holocaust the Germans didn’t go around asking, shomer shabbos? Modern? They didn’t care.
Of course men are weak in this area, does that make it right to dress so that should drool over me? Ewwww…. Why would anyone want to have that?
Well I know many people who work,they go learn every single day gemarah for more than 2 hours. So all of them have cell phones with texting and most have blackberries . Just a question, better not go to learn? They need it to work?
Well, someone told me that they tried to introduce a girl that is 30 to a religious guy, but she didn’t want to go out because he’s not a kollel boy…..I was like what???
Maybe the problem is that the girls are too accomplished for their age and any guy they go out with will not be smarter, more succesful, more religious, etc. So how is a guy going to marry a girl that is “better” than him and how is a girl going to marry a guy who is “less” than her?
Just a thought…..
Like “oh were not going to use the light anymore…..”
Blank stare…..
We have to understand that women have to feel feminine. We just have to find the way to do so with tznius.
Health
Why are cakes and cookies worse? I would never have thought so.
So basically what they’re saying is that if you have a cell phone that texts don’t bother to come and learn…. So what should they do?
What’s the term that they use? Oh yeah! off the derech, hmmmmm….
Yes sunflower, I hear you. You don’t have to stink up a room with your perfume. 😉
sunflower I see what you’re saying, but sometimes girls put on perfume to feel good. Many times I wear perfume even if my husband is in work, just don’t empty the bottle and think about where you’ll be going.
okay, I understand everyones point. I also like to dress nicely, wear nice clothes, put on makeup, wear a nice wig, etc. However it’s recomendable to use common sense( sorry if I repeat myself) for example, if I’m going somewhere with my husband and other couples will be there I will not perfume myself so that everyone will have to smell me. I don’t think there’s any halachah on that, use your brains people.
ronsr I once heard that all the girls want kollel boys and the boys all don’t want to be in kollel. So really the girls are more relgious than the guys. They are embarrased to marry a working guy.
I heard of a girl, in middle of the date says that she has to eat melave malka before a certain time, she probably wanted the guy to take her to a restaurant, he took her home and dropped her off. They didn’t get married>
a true hero………………..
why can’t we accept that there are different strokes for different folks? What works for some people won’t work for everyone.
NY mom i knew the shells were very popular, but I didn’t know that people do that. It’s the whole attitude, trying not to look like it’s a wig, or being embarrased by dressing with tznius. I once saw a sheitel macher in NY and she said to me something like “we’ll make sure nobody realizes you’re covering your hair, and you can pull your hair out of the back of the wig” It made me sick!
true, restaurants mess up all diets.
Shortening is very unhealthy, they say that it clogs the arteries.
People have lost common sense…. Spagetti straps with long sleeves underneath? Puleeze!
A rabbi isn’t supposed to be checking how women are dressed. Isn’t that a lack of tznius?
I wouldn’t know why the young ladies in the NY area are lacking tznius, but I can speak about what I see here. I feel that the teachers and rabbis don’t praise the girls enough and they don’t make them feel like kol kevoda bat melech penimah, instead they put them down and enforce silly rules about eyeliner, lipliner, they talk about how the wigs have to be a certain way, etc. But that is what I see and hear in mexico, it really bothers me because I personally think (I could be wrong) that besides doing the halachah, a person should not be given a list a requirements (pages long) and be expected to keep it. Tznius is more than that, it comes from within and before you leave your house you know what type of reaction you are going to receive from the way you look.
Some minhagim are hundreds of years old, but a lot of times they probably get lost.
I think that peoples main goal when studying is parnassah, even with the goyim. If they enjoy what they are doing there’s nothing wrong. No doctor is not going to charge most of his patients or work for free, and no one is asking them to.
Oh and mazca of course. Hey! Since the cats out of the bag, I know everyones secret identity here in the CR! But shhh don’t tell anyone TOP SECRET! I don’t want to get in trouble with the mods!;)
I think I actually know Ames in real life!
Ames that is a personal question and I can’t answer, sorry!;)
Wow mazca your on a roll! 😉
No prob wolf!
Ames and NY mom what you say really makes a a lot of sense! You have just inspired me!:)