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I agree that someone on staff should be licensed.
I work for a yeshiva day school and although we have no security guard, the doors are all locked an bulletproof and you need to be seen on a video monitor to be buzzed in. I will say that many people are lax about checking ID and that bothers me, much more so now. I still can’t get over what happened Friday.
My apologies I didn’t see the last part of what he wrote.
Every school should have armed body guards. I’m so upset over this but so warm hearted after hearing some amazing stories of bravery.
WIY, your lack of sympathy is disturbing. She didn’t ask why the shul did not say tehillim. She asked why it wasn’t mentioned. A Jewish child was killed but that is not the point. This was a horrific tragedy and we will be mourning those poor children’s lost lives forever.
As a teacher in a school, we were off for the week of Dec 25th and then again for Pesach. The only time we could really go on vacation was that week, because we only received 5 sick/vacation days and most people need to save those for when their kids are sick.
No he did admit to using the non profit org. Money for his own Children’s tuition and yes he was the one who purchased lingerie. Why are you here making up lies? Do you think it will change his outcome? What are you doing here besides further angering us who actually care about the future of klal yisroel. None of what we think matters anyway because Hashem will give due punishment, but to defend a sick criminal just because he happens to be Jewish. Not frum by any standards, but a Jew, is disgusting.
He was found guilty and is going to prison. Zehu. The fact that there are people here defending him is bringing my breakfast up. What if it was c’v your daughters? Think about it like that. What if it was your daughter, would you be happy that he was convicted? I know I would be, just like I am now. You are so quick to cry out his innocence, but why? In the history of the world has there ever been 2 make witnesses to molestation and other acts that I won’t mention here? Other girls did come forward and just because they didn’t testify on the stand does not mean what happened to them is a lie. This guy is an animal, a twisted sick animal. We live in America and it is up to the American courts to decide his punishment. To those of you who think every Jew on this earth is a malach, my only advice to you is to keep a close eye on your children, because you are living in a fantasy world.
Old man + 1
Men used to also have more than 1 wife. Things change.
1 in 10 seems like a lot! Where are the stats from?
I don’t have the literature like some do here and the actual law written out but I worked in a private school in NY for almost 4 years and it most certainly is illegal. Every year before school starts we have in-service week, and a good portion of that time is spent going over such rules and regulations. Corporal punishment is 100% illegal and not only a fire able offense but nowadays not only would the school get fined, you could be brought up on charges. We also can’t put sun block on children without a written note from parents, signed by the headmaster and teacher. I personally was a very affectionate teacher, i believe as a Morah ( not rebbe) that my 4 and 5 year olds benefitted from that level of love and affection, but I also knew where to draw the line. I was more touchy than other teachers and no one seemed to mind. If I had been in a public school however, I would have kept my hands to myself.
Of course it’s not all fairy tales I understand that. And I hope that my marriage is happy and healthy until 120, I’m just saying that some aren’t and it’s OK to admit that. It’s awful and heart breaking and most definitely used as a way out when often times it can be fixed, but sometimes it’s necessary.
Iced, how do you find that it is proof? Yes I am happy that they stayed together because now that I am married there are less complications for me/my family- basically selfish reasons. The damage was done though. Although I am very happy, I don’t have SO much faith in happy marriages. It sounds really horrible, but I never have and I hope that changes. Until I got married I whole heatedly ( and sometimes still do) believe that most married people aren’t really all that happy. My parents legitimately hated each other 75% of the time. The time that my mother was not chewing off my fathers head and thigs were calm , I SO walked on egg shells because I I did not want to be the thing to set anyone off and cause them to fight. I’m just trying to give some perspective from someone who lived through this. My parents wanted to get divorced but I was not privy to the real conversations and for some reason they never did. I want to have a discussion with my mother about it, but I probably should not drudge up the past.
I have been debating whether or no to post this point but I feel I must.
Yes, divorce should not be encouraged, and it should be a “last resort” but it is not as black and white as many are making it seem. Whenever I see someone saying, divorce is so much worse for the children, and what about the children, what will it do to the children etc.. A house with little to no shalom bayis is no better. A house with fighting, bickering, slamming doors, sleeping on the couch, things of that nature are no better.
I hAve a close relationship with my parents, I love them and they are good parents bH, wonderful people as well, but I used to wish that they would get divorced daily. They didn’t and now their marriage is pretty good, granted I don’t live at home anymore but my sister does so I know. They stuck it out and someone dealt with issue and 18 years later they are Doing well. Let me ask you this. Was it worth it? I am sure you will all say yes but I’m not so sure. Obviously I am happy now that they are together, and I don’t have to split my time between the two, and siblings disnt have to deal with living at one parents one week another parents the other, but growing up sometimes was pretty rough. My parents would go days Even weeks without speaking. My father would leave for the night after particularly bad fights. The cursing and throwing of objects and slamming of doors and the ” I wish I never married you”, and the worst to me or my siblings” I wish I never had YOU , you are the reason we fight all the time”. That was my favorite. I used to deal with each parents separately complaining to me about the other, locking one parent out of the house. The list can go on for ages. Now they seem pretty happy and I can only pray that my marriage stays great and is nothing like what theirs was. Can anyone honesty tell me I was better off that they stayed together?
Do you mean physically, verbally or sexually abused? I don’t know the statistics like some others here but I have a cousin who was verbally abused and berated during his childhood, and it definitely shines through now that he is an adult. He has trouble controlling his temper, he is very harsh and verbally abusive to his wife/kids. I know that is one example but maybe it can give you some insight.
Health- thank you for Taking the time to go over all of the points I raised! I appreciate that and your opinion.
Health
When you say the Rav and therapist are absolutely the ONLY ones who can decide if there should be a divorce or not, do you also mean ” and the two parties involved”? Please Gd I should never be in this situation and no one else here should, but I see this attitude or opinion a lot here that every decision in life should be made by you Rav. Hashem bH gave you a brain and a heart, shouldn’t we be able to know what is right for us, at least part of the time if not all? Of course consulting a rabbi close to you is important I am definitely not saying otherwise, I just feel like ultimately the decision should be up to you. If someone is miserable in a marriage, does not have love for their spouse anymore, cries themselves to sleep, no longer has attraction to the other, or feels unloved and gets berated.. Any number of things that boil down to a miserable marriage, and your rabbi says stay together, what is wrong with making the decision for yourself?
Oomis I like your last paragraph:)
I think that she just wants an idea of what to buy when the time is right. Also, not everyone holds by that. I learned that the Ayin harah is that if someone sees you buying baby items it could cause them to be jealous etc.. You know the rest. But someone could be just as envious when they see your growing belly, right? I didn’t purchase items before hand but I do know many frum people who did.
I really would suggest the chicco key fit it does have the best safety ratings. The only thing I don’t like about it is the sun roof but its not horrible, and it is very roomy and semi light weight.
Ooo yes I forgot the bundle me! I just got a jj cold bundle me, fits all the strollers and car seats. It is a mechiah. My baby kicks blankets off and since it is so cold out I just did not know what to do, this is perfect you fit it into the car seat or stroller, loop the straps trough and its like a sleeping bag. So cozy he loves it.
I remembered a few more things! I chose the wrong bath tub I wish I could return it but its been 5 months and I don’t feel right, but it was no good. Some tubs have a little infant sling, and then you can take it off for your bigger baby, but I find that the seat hurts his back. Better find a tub with no “seat” within and just a basin type tub. If this makes no sense tell me I will try to explain better, sorry!
My son loves the sleep sacks. For the fest few months I put him in pajamas but I find that he breaks out of the swaddle a lot less if at all, in a sleep sack. You can get cheap cute ones Marshall’s or target.
Don’t forget the miracle blanket! If I swore I would swear by it:).
Don’t waste your time with a wipe warmer ya not necessary.
A lot of frum women where them where I love. My son likes it a lot but I have never been completely at ease in that I feel like he will fall out. ( he won’t)!
I have one. A Britax. Do you mean the thing you can wear the baby in? I love mine but truthfully I have used it maybe 6 or 7 times. It is handy if you want to do errands with the baby, or in the warm weather take walks but I wouldn’t not have it as a necessity!
Yay!! Bshaa Tova!! I recently had my first baby:). Finally a thread that I actually know a thing or two about. You definitely want to get a snap n go stroller. I have a chicco key fit 30 ( my doctor and other realizable sources say that this is the safest. It fits until 35 pounds, however my child is only 5 months old and very tall and I can’t see him being in this by his first birthday. I definitely reccomended a swing. I did not get one because my apartment just did not have the space. All of my friends with babies have any one of the standard swings from buy buy baby and their children loved it, napped in it, played etc.
Do not waste your time with swaddle blankets except for the ” miracle blanket”. It saved my (sanity). I had 50 different swaddle blankets and after about a month, my son was able to break out of the swaddle. The miracle blanket is great and not too expensive.
This may be a basic but I found the pacifiers the hospital reccomended are horrible, my son only likes the nuk pacifiers, they helped put him back to sleep when he would wake up at night.
I’m not sure if you are planning to nurse but I do, and a good pump is worth a million bucks. BH I got mine as a gift but it is the smartest thing I own. Medela is great.
I have had a fantastic pack n play as my sons crib, he is moving to his actual crib this week, but if you want him/her with you I suggest this. Babies often outgrow bassinets and the pack n play will be more useful in the future. I will think of more things but.. Good luck bhaa Tova I hope that I helped a bit.
Get over yourself please.
Wow!!! Who is quick to judge now?? I am disgusted. First of all my husband and I donated a huge box of brand new baby and toddler clothes to the victims in far rockaway, second, we donated money to two different tzedaka collecting for the people in seagate, third we housed friends for 2 nights who lost power after the hurricane and were happy to do so.
As for the first part of your attack, correct I don’t have any marriage aged children right now, but I do have many friends who were out of town and bH managed to find husbands. Maybe it took them a little longer because of the traveling and what not, but they did. I can appreciate that it is a tough situation, but I am entitled to believing that there are literally thousands of other tzedaka worthy of the money.
No you can’t cash it in under the table. A lot of state revenue comes from lottery wins, geshmakman explained it. Hope you won though!
I know there is a shidduch crisis and all but, it is the girl or boys choice to fly back and forth to date.there are many many more tzedakas worthy of our money. People are literally starving, dying of disease, living in ruins right now after the hurricane in New York, hospitals that need money, yeshivas that fear closing due to lack of funds. That is only to name a few.
Coffee bean and tea leaf is nice and in the warmer months you can’t sit outside, they have kosher sandwiches besides their drinks. LE marais is a great restaurant too!
My license plate ends in an even number, so does that mean I can fill up mWF? I still have not gotten gas since the hurricane because the lines are unreal.
I think it is proper etiquette to invite the spouses but I agree with your last statement. I was one of the first of my friends to be married, but my friends who are getting married now have the same complaints! I sympathize with you! I think it might be more reasonable if you invite only your friends but I think your wife needs to invite both. Hatzlacha and Bshaa Tova on your chasana!
Health, that’s an interesting point.
The only and I mean only thing I can even stomach to say is that he seems to be a good father and husband. Who doesn’t though on the outside? Trying to be a bit positive after crying all night.
I cried all night. I don’t know what will be of this country. Gay marriage /being openly gay will be the new norm, anyone who isn’t in favor of it will be shunned, israel is finished may Hashem protect them. Just wait and see, Obama’s immigration policy is going to ruin this country, he will probably take down the border fences and I am not kidding. The only solace I can find is that in 4 years he will have messed us up so badly that the Republicans will win in a landslide.
How do you find Johnson more qualified than Romney? Obama was never qualified but he got elected, he may be ruining our country but he is technically ” qualified”.
Oh my goodness I am so sick of people saying that Romney means the end of government help. Pay attention!!!!!!!!!! Romney does not want the world to be as dependent on gov assistance as we have become due to Obama’s failing policies, and ” the gov owes me” attitude. Gov Romney does not plan to take benefits from those who truly need it. There is a huge misconception about Republicans and the end of learning in kollel as we know it. It’s a farce.
Romney is up 270,000 votes from early voting in Ohio.
I don’t know what is right or wrong, but I feel like the general tone here is ” let’s put a woman in her place”. I happen to be home now with my baby, but until he was born I worked full time and even brought in more money than my husband. Still I always made sure there was dinner and that I was clean as everyone put it. My husband helped by doing dishes, cleaning the bathroom, being a wonderful husband, I don’t think anyone should settle for anything less.
Look at the polls. We might just get a lucky break after all. Also, what about him or his presidency makes you think that he keeps his word?
Is it Halacha to say that modern orthodoxy is apikorsus?
That’s not what crying wolf means…
Anyway, I am not calling everyone out but there is a certain tone in this thread, and hundreds of others, that say the same thing. Don’t tell me/us not to overreact and get so defensive. Some, not all, of the things said in this thread were very hurtful and offensive, if you don’t want people to cry foul then don’t write it.
In what sense was I crying wolf?