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Moe GreenMember
Few people hate housecleaning more than husbands
So most people hate husbands more than housecleaning? Why are so many people getting married then, instead of becoming janitors?
Moe GreenMemberA Jew learning Torah L’shmo does more for Klal Yisroel than all the IDF.
And a Jew learning Torah lishmo does more for Klal Yisroel than all the baalei battim combined.
But the baalei battim are still the ones who are to be thanked for providing for the Jew learning Torah, and for paying for the Torah education of his children. Similarly, the IDF is to be thanked for the security of the inhabitants of the country – irregardless of whether or not their success is due to all the Torah learning that their service enables.
Sounds fair – the IDF protects the country, enabling Jews to learn in relative peace, which in turn enables the success of the IDF. Should be a perfect relationship.
Moe GreenMemberWolfishMusings
OK, perhaps someone can clarify something for me here, because I’m totally confused on one point:
if someone who is in the shidduch parsha just happens to meet someone of the opposite gender that they think they might have an interest in, why shouldn’t the “small talk” be permitted? After all, how else is s/he supposed to determine that this person is/isn’t a potential match?
Or is a shadchan the *only* way to meet someone and if you happen to come across someone in “real life,” you just have to forget it?
The Wolf
What if I just happen to meet someone of the opposite gender who is very nice and interesting and I find attractive, but this person just happens to be a mamzer/mamzeres (literally, i.e. someone who is forbidden from marrrying within the general Jewish population)?
The mamzeres would not be a potential match, but what would stop me from “falling for” the person while I was changing her tire? This is a bad situation. It might be hard to break up such a relationship. It would be better not to have met in the first place.
A mamzer is an extreme example, as most families would frown upon their child “falling for” a person completely kosher to marry but who is outside of a clearly defined band (be it narrow or wide). Case in point – don’t you think that the Montagues would have been much happier overall if their son had agreed to only talk to girls suggested by a matchmaker?
Moe GreenMemberWolf,
Your conclusion is fallacious. Instead, it should be as follows: If a shadchan is required nowadays, my wife will not be getting any more shidduch offers.
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