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I included this person’s name in my Refuah Shleimah prayer during this morning’s recitation of the Amidah.
The custom that I grew up with was giving an English with the same initial as the Hebrew one – therefore, my daughter Avigayil has Abigail on her birth certificate. As she was named after a man named Abba, we asked our Rabbi for a feminine equivalent and this one was of a few that he suggested. My grandkids are named in a similar fashion – Yakov Shmuel is Joshua Kevin (the Shmuel he is named after had a “K” first name) and Binyamin Mattityahu is Benjamin Matthew.
When it is time for my neshamah to part company with my body, I believe that Hashem will decide my future. It doesn’t matter how much TV I have watched in my life – nor what the content was, but rather, how I lived my life. Attending shul, studying various Judaic topics, giving tzedakah to the best of my ability, and doing kind things for others will be the deciding factors. No one person has the right to sit in judgement of how other people choose to live their daily lives (as long as it doesn’t involve illegal activities – then one certainly may be judged). We all do what is right for ourselves and our families. Yidden are often far too quick to point out even minor variances in lifestyles as being harmful. Many of us spend so much time pointing out differences that they forget how much alike we are. It seems the fact that we are all Bnei Yisroel gets left behind. We should be more united and quit quibbling over lifestyle differences. It just serves to be divisive. Accessing the various forms of media available to us is far less harmful than all of the Lashon Hora that arises from from many of these blogs.
Moderator 80: You are very intuitive. That is exactly why I chose Kalman. I also used to have a friend by that name who happens to be a lovely person, so it was the first name that came to mind that had a similar sound. Efshar, you should become a detective??
These days there is far too much “Bar” and not enough “Mitzvah” at most of these functions.
Many years ago I had a gentile neighbor who had a child that was a bit of a problem. At that time, kindergarten in public school was only a half day program, so she decided to send her son to a Hebrew day school for another half day program in order to occupy his entire day. Shortly after he started Hebrew school she phoned me to say that her son needed to have a Hebrew name and could I suggest one. Well….his given name was Christian, so after a few minutes thought, I told her to tell the teacher that his name was Kalman. And he was know as Kalman at that school for the entire year.
The only suggestion that I have is to sit further away from this person if this happens again. I realize that this can be very annoying. Recently a gentleman began attending our morning minyan to say kaddish. He recites the Kaddish D’Rabbanan and the Mourner’s Kaddish completely out of sync with the minyan leader and the rest of the mourners and I find this confusing. I just try my hardest to shut out his voice and concentrate on the leader’s rhythym. It usually works – but, of course, Kaddish is a short prayer.
I agree with gift certificate for spa services… or a really good bottle of wine…..or some new desirable kitchen gadget….or with the Yomtovim just around the corner – have a lovely floral arrangement delivered to her home Erev Rosh Hashanah.
Mango – absolutely without question.
I speak from experience – I was given a second chance. I was fortunate enough to survive and completely recover from a cardiac arrest in 2001. I was extremely lucky that this event happened while I was in a major teaching hospital’s operating room.
Since that time, I believe that I have become a much better person. It has taken me several years but I have completely changed my life. I began this process by going through a divorce, freeing myself from a marriage that had not been happy for many years. I have since joined and become extremely active in a shul and in the total Jewish community – something that I had not participated in for many years. I now attend shul everyday and participate in the morning Minyan.
Life is now so much more beautiful for me with shul and Torah in my life. I have a host of new friends – good, caring ones. I have no family in this city and when the Yomtovim are here, I have more invitations than I can handle. I donate as much money as I can afford to various Tzedakah funds and have begun my personal tzedakah project, where I bake and sell my specialty cake and donate all the money to charity.
None of this would have been possible in my “old” life, as my spouse would not attend shul – even on Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur and believed that “charity begins at home”. He was antisocial and didn’t want much to do with friendships. Of course, in those days, it would not have occurred to me to attend shul or social functions on my own.
Since my “rebirth” in 2001, I thank Hashem daily and believe that I have become a far better person.
PS: This is my first post here.