Midwest2

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  • in reply to: I have a BTL, now what can I do? #1514552
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Try Touro in New York. They have many programs and they’re frum-friendly.

    in reply to: BT vs FFB #1514068
    Midwest2
    Participant

    zd – exactly. How many people who lost the battle would have been able to make it if they had had some encouragement?

    in reply to: BT vs FFB #1513188
    Midwest2
    Participant

    TGI –

    The majority of the Jews who came to the US before WWII came because they were poor and/or their lives were at risk. They left their homes in many cases because they couldn’t feed their families, or because the pogromchiks were destroying their communities. They weren’t involved with the arts – they didn’t have the time or money. Many of them tried to stay shomer Shabbos, but in the days of the 6-day work-week many couldn’t face the challenge of being told, “If you don’t come in on Saturday, don’t come in on Monday.” Nowadays we have all sorts of legal protections that didn’t exist then. Can any of us claim with confidence that we would stand up to the nisyonos any better than they did?

    We are a spoiled generation, and I don’t mean materially. We can argue in the CR about wearing your peyos out in the office, when fifty years ago it was difficult to find a professional job where you could keep Shabbos. We have no idea of the dedication our grandparents had to have to stay Shomer Shabbos as new immigrants to the US.

    in reply to: expressing jewish pride in the workforce #1513183
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Beee:

    I still don’t get this “Jewish pride” bit. We should be grateful that HKBH made us be born Jews, and we should try our best to live up to the standards the Torah sets for us. People worry about “pride” when they don’t really feel sure of themselves. Obviously a person who r”l feels embarrassed about being a Jew has personal problems, but going around with one’s nose in the air because of HKBH’s kindness to you isn’t the way to go either.

    We shouldn’t imitate non-Jews or try to dress like them, and that includes, for example, listening to non-jewish talk radio and quoting its personalities as if they’re some sort of posek.

    Act with dignity and consideration and the world will respect you, and you won’t have to worry about defending your “pride.”

    in reply to: People trivialize physical disorders all the time. #1513185
    Midwest2
    Participant

    That’s exactly the problem. There are no replies because no one “gets” the point of the original post. We use figures of speech so often without thinking that we almost literally don’t realize what we’re saying.

    in reply to: expressing jewish pride in the workforce #1512842
    Midwest2
    Participant

    If you’re going to wear long peyos and your tzitzis out, then your ethical behavior, bein adam l’chaveiro, and personal deportment better match your appearance. Cutting corners, pulling shtick, pushing to the head of the line, and similar behavior when you are so obviously identifiable as a Jew is plain hillul haShem. In my mixed neighborhood I am very obviously a Jew, and I feel that I must try to maintain a standard of behaviour that would meet the approval of Shimon ben Shetach (or at least of my Rav). And forget the “pride” business. Ga’avah isn’t a good midah. What you should aim for are respect and dignity and the trait of showing them also for other people, Jew and non-Jew.

    This isn’t idealism, it’s enlightened self-interest, because the person who gets a negative impression of you today will act on it tomorrow when they’re interacting with me or any other Jew.

    And better believe that your boss – and everyone else in the company – knows how you usually dress, so don’t worry about “dressing down.” If anything, it adds to the negative impression.

    in reply to: Sudden Death #1509298
    Midwest2
    Participant

    It all depends on the screening tests. You have to have a general practitioner/internist you can trust, and take his/her advice. Don’t ask for something just because you saw it on the internet 🙂 Some tests, like blood tests, are trivial. Others, like CT scans, could add a bit to your lifetime radiation exposure, but are basically harmless. And others, like colonoscopies, are very invasive and have a risk of complications, and should be done only under a doctor’s advice that it’s necessary or recommended, especially for older age groups.

    Take your MDs advice. If he/she recommends a test, get it done. If you don’t need it, don’t get it.

    in reply to: Jewish Jobs – Shouldnt Say Female Only Very Many Times #1509096
    Midwest2
    Participant

    According to federal law, you can only discriminate in hiring if the requirement is a genuine issue. Jobs such as secretary, nurse or accountant can be done equally well by men and women, so specifying “female only” in the advertisement could get you in legal trouble. There are exceptions made for religious organizations for some requirements, such as having a man to teach gemara. For secular studies, I’m not sure what the law is. Since the job of secretary in a yeshiva could be performed by either a man or a woman, it would probably be illegal to specify a woman.

    Some frum employers get around the law by advertising only in frum venues, or just using word of mouth. And I agree that it seems that some people hire girls and women precisely because they can pay them less – but that’s been a problem in the secular world too. Employment law is complicated, and needs a legal expert.

    in reply to: Getting a ride with someone from the opposite gender #1509095
    Midwest2
    Participant

    The first principle here would be, “just have sekel.” If the woman is stranded, you definitely want to give/take a ride. And I don’t think that driving someone’s bubby to the airport is problematic. I also don’t think that today’s society is comparable to the times of the Gemara.

    The bottom line: if you have doubts, ask your Rav, particularly if he’s older and has a lot of experience advising people in everyday life. He knows the halachas, knows you, and knows the circumstances of the community in which you live.

    in reply to: Evolution in Government #1508569
    Midwest2
    Participant

    I don’t think commentators are actually talking about “evolution” as in Darwin’s “theory of evolution.” I think they’re just using it as a figure to speech to say that something has changed gradually over time (and it’s something they approve of. Otherwise they would say “deteriorated ” 🙂

    in reply to: This Beer Predicament #1508568
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Neville – thanks for the clarification. Since I don’t live in the New York area I did’t realize the issue. OOT you usually know everyone who sells kosher and the local rabbonim keep track of where it’s safe to buy after Pesach anyway.

    It’s a little frightening to think that people could have been drinking non-permissible beer for years and no one’s ever said anything.

    in reply to: Sudden Death #1508565
    Midwest2
    Participant

    A) I post only under “Midwest2” and I do not have multiple personality disorder.

    B) Thinking out loud – thank you for your list of what not to say to someone who has suffered a loss. It is an essential chessed to be sensitive to those who are suffering or bereaved, and even if we feel the need to make sense out of someone’s passing, we must not do it at the expense of hurting those mourning.

    C. HKBH runs the universe. There is no such thing as an “untimely” death – only one that on human terms seems unreasonable. So what can we do? Our hishtadlus – good health habits, proper health care, all the things your doctor will tell you or that you can find on cdc.gov – and daven for arichas yomim.

    in reply to: Will learning Mussar help a psychopath or Narcissist? Among others. #1507985
    Midwest2
    Participant

    TLIK – yes, some of the posts in this thread are uninformed or misinformed, but I remember a time when discussing anything to do with mental health was strictly taboo. In at least one case that I know of, a clinically depressed bachur killed himself because his parents were too afraid of the stigma to get him help. Who knows how many other lives were ruined because their suffering was kept in the shadows? Torah Umesorah gets the credit for being the first frum organization to arrange mental health care for yeshivas, and since then we have seen much, much progress.

    I’m just happy to see that the subject can be discussed in the open now. If people are willing to talk and listen, misconceptions can be corrected, and those who need help can get it.

    in reply to: This Beer Predicament #1507982
    Midwest2
    Participant

    So people in the NYC area can’t just go without beer until Shavuos? I like beer too, but I can certainly live without it for a few weeks. As noted above, “… that this is a machlokes haposkim with recognized poskim on both sides of the issue and one should consult his own Rav what to do. ” So consult your posek, and if the prospect of going without beer next year is too distressing, buy enough and sell it with the chometz (unless you’re one of those who doesn’t sell real chometz, in which case I advise you to switch to wine.)

    It’s a good thing that the possibility of a sheilah has been recognized, but it’s nothing to get very excited about. Just follow your Rav.

    in reply to: Will learning Mussar help a psychopath or Narcissist? Among others. #1506962
    Midwest2
    Participant

    As a mere MA in experimental psychology I would still like to put in my 2 cents worth. Borderline, antisocial (psychopathy) and narcissistic personality disorders are almost by definition due to an underlying lack of ability to perform certain brain functions (like feeling empathy). Think of it as the emotional equivalent of dyslexia. Part of the problem with these three personality disorders is that they don’t distress the person having them, they distress the people around them who suffer from their actions.

    Learning musar is not going to help a dyslexic learn to read – special techniques are needed. For people with these types of personality disorder, change is very hard, because the person doesn’t think they need to change. Psychotherapy with such patients is very, very hard and seldom very successful. The people who most benefit from therapy are the family members who have to deal with the person.

    So no, musar is not going to help the patient. Psychotherapy might, but maybe not. Anyone who thinks they are involved with someone with one of these disorders should seek help for themselves, to deal with the stress of the patient’s behavior, and also ask relevant sheilos as they come up.

    in reply to: Holocaust survivor became atheist #1506439
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Over the years I have had many friends who survived the camps and stayed frum. Yet they never spoke against those who didn’t stay religious. They knew what they had gone through. If the survivors themselves refused to judge, who are we to show such chutzpah?

    in reply to: Yeshivas in Israel #1506423
    Midwest2
    Participant

    If the parents are pushing him to be more yeshivish, sending him to EY might be a disaster, unless they have family there who will keep a close eye on him.

    Every boy and girl has their own personality and values, and trying to push them to be something they’re not happy is going to set them up for a difficult time. From what I’ve heard there is a real lack of supervision in the yeshivas there compared to here, and the temptations are just as strong., especially if there is no family close by for support.

    If the family is well-educated but not extremely yeshivish it is’t reasonable to expect the son they have raised to be different. If there are problems that are not being mentioned, and I sense there might be, it would be better to get counseling or personalized advice. It might also be wise to – strange as it may seem – talk to the bochur himself and find out what he feels he needs. Trying to jam a square peg into a round hole damages both the peg and the hole.

    in reply to: Banning All Missionary Activity Inside Israel #1505868
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Gadolhadorah – that is exactly the problem. How, in a democracy, do you enact laws that limit religious freedom in general, or for certain specific groups? Most democracies currently regard religion as an area that is strictly “hands off” for government regulation. The supporters of the missionary groups would be very quick to take action. Remember that we’re a tiny minority in the US, so we couldn’t count on the US Congress to help us.

    And what about missionizing non-Jews? A Xtian missionizing a Muslim? Muslims missionizing Xtians? Either one trying to missionize a Druze? It gets very, very complicated.

    in reply to: Banning All Missionary Activity Inside Israel #1505584
    Midwest2
    Participant

    And akuperman – the “yoke” in HaTikvah” isn’t the yoke of Torah, it’s the yoke of non-Jewish political domination and persecution. Get acquainted with modern Jewish history so you know what you’re being leitz about.

    in reply to: Banning All Missionary Activity Inside Israel #1505580
    Midwest2
    Participant

    There seems to be a belief that all non-frum Jews in Israel are atheists. But from my experience and from the number of Israelis who observe some mitzvos, that isn’t the case. For instance, the majority of Jews in Israel fast on Yom Kippur (see the YWN article on this last fall). The militant atheists are a small fraction of hilonim. Most fall into the “spiritual but not religious” classification, i.e. they believe in a Deity, in right and wrong, the existence of a soul, etc. but don’t affiliate with any established religion. In Israel, most identify as Jews and keep many traditional practices, but don’t care to join up to a fully-observant lifestyle. Take a look at how successful kiruv efforts have been, and how many children of non-chareidi parents are going to religious schools.

    In fact, one could think that the strident, in-your-face attitude and political involvement of the most visible Hareidi groups might have some off-putting influence on Israelis, who for very good reasons are skeptical of politics in general. And looking down on them because “they’re all atheists” isn’t going to be much of a draw either.

    in reply to: Wife Driving or Husband Driving? #1505476
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Insurance companies are in business to make money, and they use actuaries – specialized mathematicians – to figure out how much to charge in what circumstances in order to make a profit. Their premiums are based on how much money they have to pay out in claims for a particular demographic. So if men are charged more for insurance it’s because men – especially 15-30 – cost the company more in claims than other groups. So either they’re having more accidents or the ones they’re having cost more. It’s plain old capitalist logic.

    in reply to: Are you selling your pet for Pesach? #1504162
    Midwest2
    Participant

    For those preoccupied with the practical aspects of halachos of both Pesach and tza’ar baalei chaim: you start changing your pet’s food over a week or two before Pesach. Start by feeding a small amount of the new food to make sure it agrees with your furry friend, then over time increase the amount of chometz-free food and decrease the amount of chometz until by bedika time (or your neighborhood’s last garbage pickup) your pet is eating only chometz-free. And don’t forget when Pesach is over to reverse the process by gradually changing over from chometz-free to its regular food.

    Mentsch, having lived in New York for a few years I sympathize with you, but don’t think that all dog owners are bums. And realize that the guy who’s inconveniencing the public with his dog is probably doing it in lots of other ways too, so don’t land on the poor dog so hard.

    Having a pet or not isn’t a matter of being “Jewish” but of the individual’s own choice and, if they seek it, the advice of their LOR. It’s sefirah time, when we have to treat each other with increased respect. So: let Joe stop trying to tell us what’s kosher and let’s the rest of us stop calling him out roughly on it.

    in reply to: Are you selling your pet for Pesach? #1503740
    Midwest2
    Participant

    CTLawyer – sorry I missed your post about cats – I think it was still in moderation when I posted. Cats are certainly easier to keep if you don’t have a yard for a dog, and they’re certainly first-class pets.

    I don’t get the bit about having pets not being a “Jewish thing.” Maybe it wasn’t when people had just gotten off the boat and needed all their money for merely surviving. But times change. Twenty years ago sushi wasn’t a “Jewish thing” and now you can’t escape from it. (And I hate the stuff.) There certainly was no kosher Chinese in Europe. My Sefardi friends eat rice on Pesach, which I would never do. So why are we telling other people what is and isn’t “Jewish?”

    in reply to: Are you selling your pet for Pesach? #1503509
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Why is no one discussing cats? Cats are also cute, lovable and furry. And they also have chometz issues with commercial cat food.

    Yes, frum people also have cats (especially those who tend to get mice). Why are dogs an issue and not cats? Because you don’t have to walk them on Shabbos? There seems to be some major league discrimination here. (And what about hamsters, gerbils, birds and fish? Are those also forbidden because it’s a “goyishe zach?”)

    in reply to: Can a “Kosher” Restaurant Advertise it also is “Halal” #1503012
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Milhouse – that is a very thorough answer. What is your source? It looks as if you consulted something authoritative, and I’d like to check out what else they have.

    in reply to: Can a “Kosher” Restaurant Advertise it also is “Halal” #1502919
    Midwest2
    Participant

    At this point I think we need a certified local posek, which I am definitely not. And a Muslim would need to consult with his local imam. What is permitted no doubt varies across time and place, so the authority needs to be local.

    in reply to: Can a “Kosher” Restaurant Advertise it also is “Halal” #1502647
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Rambam lived safely in Egypt. If I remember correctly, Ashkenzi rabbonim poskened that Christianity is “shituf” – not avodah zarah but saying that there is something in addition to HKBH. Quite understandable, especially if you lived in a Catholic country where the local rabbi could be called on to debate priests in the public square. In any case, that’s how it’s poskened today. About non-mainline groups like J’s Witnesses or Mormons I’m not sure. Most of the Christians I know try to be good people according to their understanding, even if some of them do believe some strange things about Jews. (The Jews own all the banks? I’m a Jew – where’s my bank? I want my bank! 🙂 I assume the same is true for most Muslims outside the anti-Israel groups.

    I think the kosher-halal question might depend upon whether halal is available in a given area, or a Muslim might have to make do with kosher. At least he’s sure there are no non-halal animal products in it.

    in reply to: Can a “Kosher” Restaurant Advertise it also is “Halal” #1502645
    Midwest2
    Participant

    ubiquitin – 🙂

    in reply to: Can a “Kosher” Restaurant Advertise it also is “Halal” #1502597
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Many years ago I was walking down the street in my hometown on a week-day Yom Tov and passed our local kosher meat store. Outside I saw a very bewildered-looking young man (no yarmulke) peering through the window. When I asked him if I could help him he replied that he was a Muslim exchange student at the local university and got his meat at the kosher store because he could be sure it was halal, and that many of his friends looked for the kosher mark on food in the grocery before buying. I explained to him about the Yom Tov and told him when the store would be open again. He thanked me very sincerely and went his way.

    Putting a sign in your store window that you are halal-compliant doesn’t mean that you endorse Islam. If it leads to extra parnassah for the Jewish owner why not? I’ve also know Christians who buy kosher because they think it’s better supervised and healthier. Incidentally, Islam and Christianity aren’t technically avodah zarah – they have other classifications (e.g. shituf for Christianity) and don’t fall under that strict category of issurim. Let’s worry about more important things – like being respectful of each other when we post to the Coffee Room.

    in reply to: Pictures of women in frum magazines and advertisements #1502595
    Midwest2
    Participant

    I read these magazines on Shabbos, and also during the week. It’s very simple – don’t look at the ads on Shabbos. You have bechirah – use it.

    in reply to: Are you selling your pet for Pesach? #1502068
    Midwest2
    Participant

    In a more serious vein – since I have pets I’ve had to research what I’m allowed to give them. The Star-K (based in Baltimore) has a detailed discussion on pet food in its Pesach section. I think the CRC has, too. So you don’t have to give away your pet armadillo, you can just look up what kind of food you’re permitted to give it. 🙂

    And for those deprived folk who live in NYC – many of us out-of-towners have pets. Especially if you have a yard, pets are one of the perks of the OOT life-style. And if you don’t have a yard, you can always have fish – or an iguana. But don’t park your pet with someone without consulting your rav about whether it’s permitted. Ownership has to be really transferred. and make sure the person knows how to care for it.

    A gut Moed to all!

    in reply to: Thoughts on going OTD #1500382
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Move out of town – far out of town. Chicago, Cleveland, Baltimore, Denver, Memphis. Not Lakewood or Monsey, they’re still basically NYC. New York is a strange and difficult environment for many people (and not just frume yidden). Out of town people in general are much less materialistic, more into bein adam l’chaveiro. When your community is small, there are no disposable people.

    As a friend of mine says, “The Torah is perfect but Jews aren’t.” There are also many fine Yidden in NYC, but the general environment makes it difficult.

    Don’t give up – get out. There’s a whole different Jewish world out there.

    (And yes, maybe I’m stereotyping New Yorkers and making lashon hara on a community, but in this case I think it’s pikuach nefesh for a yiddishe neshama.)

    in reply to: Whistling #1497600
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Reb Yidd – From what I’ve seen it gets lots of attention -negative attention. In fact, under certain circumstances it might be interpreted as harassment. Better to offer flowers or a box of candy.

    in reply to: Chilul Hashem #1497452
    Midwest2
    Participant

    But who decides who is a rasha or a kofer? That’s the ikar of the issue.

    We are all familiar with the Yetzer Hara’s tricks, especially describing nogeia b’davar as l’shem Shomayim.

    One of the possible penalties for lashon hara is losing your Olam Habah. Why take the risk? Ask a posek, or at least your rav, before you start publicizing anything.

    in reply to: Neo-Nazis Running For Congress #1497193
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Clarification: I personally have nothing against Democratic Socialists. It seems that Avi does, which is why I worded my comment the way I did. I have nothing against any member of a sane, non-antisemitic political party. It’s political competition and dialogue (argument?) that keeps our democracy healthy.

    And a healthy democracy rejects neo-Nazis, white supremacists, Holocaust deniers and all the rest of that miserable crew.

    in reply to: Chilul Hashem #1497189
    Midwest2
    Participant

    laskern – there are a lot of very serious problems here. Nobody should publicize anything negative about anybody before consulting a posek. There are too many opportunities for mistakes, misinterpretations and real issues of nogeia b’davar.

    Don’t put yourself at risk. Ask a sheilah from someone who has smicha and expertise in loshon hara.

    in reply to: Neo-Nazis Running For Congress #1496439
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Avi, you just uttered a logical contradiction (or you don’t remember who the Moonies are). The Moonies were founded as a cult by a Korean preacher who doubled as an operative for the South Korean version of the CIA. The Moonies specifically lobbied Congress to be as anti-Communist as possible. (Lots of undercover stuff going there, which seems to have been forgotten.)

    For a person to be both a Moonie and a Democratic Socialist is like saying he is both a follower of Farrakhan and a white supremacist. This guy is obviously objectionable for many reasons, but the two that you quoted can’t both be true.

    in reply to: McCabe’s firing #1496382
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Old news, guys. Today the headline is that the President’s head attorney for the probe has quit because the Prez isn’t listening to his advice. The attorney for some mysterious reason had advised Trump against a face-to-dace meeting with Mueller, and Trump actually wants one. For someone like Trump with no legal training or experience this is like volunteering to go swimming in a pool full of great white sharks.

    I have never liked Mr. Trump, and sincerely wish that the Republican party had nominated someone like Kasich or Rubio, but now he is the president, and any further major scandal isn’t going to be good for the country. Free-associating under oath to the FBI isn’t as much fun as tweeting at 7 in the morning. It can come back to haunt Trump – and our country – big time.

    in reply to: Chilul Hashem #1496364
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Sounds dangerous to try to figure this out on one’s own.

    First, you have to determine if he really is a rasha, and I don’t think your average yid-in-the-street is competent to do this. You would have to ask a posek, and he would probably ask for proof, not just something like “I heard that…..”

    Second, you would have to ask a sheilah about lashon hara. This is a pretty heavy kind of issue, and again you need your local posek.

    Third, you would have to be clear that you are really only doing this l’shem shomayim, and that there aren’t any personal issues involved, or that you’re doing it eacause it’s giving you hana’ah to denounce somebody else’s wrongdoing.

    It all sounds pretty perilous to me. If you can’t get this person to make teshuvah by speaking privately with him, consult your posek. Under no circumstances try to act as judge, jury and journalist and talk in public about it without getting a reliable halachic psak.

    in reply to: Whistling #1495947
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Asur or mutar – there’s still a major problem with whistling. How many people know how to whistle in tune? Most whistlers are flat, sharp or both at once. I suspect that these are also the people that can’t carry a tune singing. If you’re at all musical, and are being subjected to someone’s inept whistling, you might be tempted to hit them with your music stand. Or, if it’s Shabbos and the person is attempting to sing zemiros, suddenly yell, “Let’s bentsch already!” And some of the worst offenders are also the most enthusiastic whistlers, since they can’t tell they’re out of tune anyway.

    Shlomo Carlebach a”h may have been able to whistle like a nightingale, but I’m afraid the majority sound like a tin whistle crossed with a kazoo.

    in reply to: Common Sense Gun Policies #1495290
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Health – a lot of schools do have metal detectors, but then you have to remember to do things like keep all the other doors locked. And keep a guard on the door, since with an AR-15 you can simply blow the lock off the door. Those things shoot through walls. I worked in an office where they had one for security, and the idiot who used it used to keep leaning it carelessly up against the wall, despite being warned that if it slipped it could kill someone next door.

    Metal detectors are good, especially in urban situations where people can bring handguns to school in their backpacks. But no metal detector is going to be proof against an AR-15. You need a coordinated plan to keep a school safe.

    in reply to: Common Sense Gun Policies #1495265
    Midwest2
    Participant

    A few points on the Maryland shooting:

    1. A handgun was used, not an assault rifle. It also appears that the shooter was targeting a specific person – his ex-girlfriend – and not out to stage a massacre. I think it will turn out to be a personal conflict, not a mentally ill person out to kill as many as possible. In fact, this does not qualify as a mass shooting, since fewer than four people were shot.

    2. The person who stopped the gunman was the school resource officer – a sworn, professional police officer – not an armed teacher or staff person. Handling a crisis situation requires a lot more training than simply knowing which end of a gun the bullet comes out of.

    3. This incident might also qualify as what is usually known as “suicide by cop.” The shooter knows that he will be targeted and killed by law enforcement and deliberately provokes it as a way of committing suicide.

    And yes, Avi, Eisenhower did federalize the Guard, much to the unhappiness of the local authorities. (I watched it on TV.) Remember, it’s the NATIONAL guard, and a lot of the fighting in Iraq was done by Guard units who had been mobilized for national service. In peacetime they usually do things like help out in disasters, but they are a military force which answers to the Commander in Chief.

    in reply to: McCabe’s firing #1494011
    Midwest2
    Participant

    I agree with Avi. It really does “smell of vindictiveness,” especially given the tweets and other messages that Pres. Trump has given. And don’t forget that this isn’t just US news – the world is paying attention. Every time the current administration does something that isn’t normal by accepted standards, it reinforces the impression that the US is no longer run according to accepted principles, and that it can’t be relied upon diplomatically, economically, or even militarily. That’s going to hurt.

    And it’s really going to hurt Israel too, because we’ve relied on US backing so much in the UN and otherwise. The Israeli economy is no longer a bunch of kibbutzim and moshavim selling fruit to Europe (as it was when I lived there). It is now completely enmeshed in the world economy, and vulnerable to all kinds of economic and political maneuvers. People abroad are getting really annoyed with having to worry about figuring out what Trump is going to do next, and that negative attitude is going to spill over and reinforce the anti-Israel feelings that already exist. With some friends, you don’t need enemies.

    in reply to: I Hope Trump Gets Impeached 🎺🍑 #1493993
    Midwest2
    Participant

    One thing that a lot of people are overlooking: the next-in-line for President is Pence. Pence is a perfectly normal, sane competent-type politician. I don’t agree with most of his politics, but I couldn’t make a case that he’s incompetent or irresponsible. In fact, I think that’s why he was chosen as vice-president. For conservatives he makes an excellent alternative to the current lack of focus, and I think that if Trump were to do anything really bizarre, he would be removed from office whatever the circumstances and Pence would take over.

    Keep an eye on the midterms. If it really looks like it’s going to be a disaster for the Republicans, something might happen to push Trump out – openly or quietly. Politicians like to remain in office (and continue getting donations from lobbyists) so if it looks like Trump is seriously endangering the status quo he could be in trouble. All those Republican career politicians he despises have plenty more practice at playing the game than he does.

    in reply to: I Hope Trump Gets Impeached 🎺🍑 #1493663
    Midwest2
    Participant

    I’m going to break with the minhag on this thread by not replying to anyone in particular with indignation, scorn or other negative emotions. So here goes:

    1) I really miss Eisenhower and the old Republican party. I’m surprised he doesn’t come back and haunt the schlemiels who call themselves Republicans today.

    2. Trump is doing some things which are drastically unpopular with his own party, like threatening a trade war. The Republican party has always been the party of business, and businesses hate to lose money. Industry groups are already pleading with him to hold off tariffs. If he does start a trade war it won’t just be that the political knives will come out – it will be more like kalashnikovs and grenade launchers.

    3. Midterms are coming up, and the tweetstorms and odd pronouncements are making Republican candidates fearful of losing their seats. Politicians like to stay in office.

    4. His foreign policy changes from day to day. It may not matter that this bothers the leaders of other nations, but it does bother the people in Congress who are trying to conduct foreign policy on a day-to-day basis.

    At this point it doesn’t really matter what the Democrats think of Trump – his own party is becoming extremely unhappy with him. I would guess that if he springs any more surprises – like firing Mueller – they really will vote to impeach him, and given the balance in the Senate, he could very well be convicted.

    I’m not happy with the prospect of Trump being impeached. It’s messy and internationally embarrassing. Unfortunately, he doesn’t seem to learn from experience. And given his age, weight and lack of exercise, and that he’s on statins, I wonder if there aren’t also medical issues. Those are risk factors for strokes, which can impair impulse control and judgment. I would have been happier if his medical exam had included some brain imaging.

    We’ve got trouble, as the old song goes, right here in Washington, and whatever the outcome is, we’re going to suffer for it in international credibility. (And also in our ability to defend Israel against its political enemies.)

    in reply to: Wife older than husband: How is it working out? #1493509
    Midwest2
    Participant

    “Older than” is a variable term. 2 months? 2 years? Ten years? Who we have to worry about are the shadchanim. A year or two is irrelevant, so make sure the shadchanim you consult know it. Same with height. Why does the boy have to be taller? In Europe it wasn’t a issue. An inch or a few? So what.

    It strikes me though, that the OP’s friend may have some issues. Is he looking for an older girl because he’s got a “problem” and he thinks that an older girl will care less? Or that her “desperation” will give him more power?

    It’s like blue for boys and pink for girls. It wasn’t something that existed in Europe, but we’ve picked it up from the non-Jewish environment here.

    in reply to: Tillerson Is Fired Via Tweet #1491653
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Majority, plurality, enough with the semantics. The bottom line is Clinton got almost three million more votes than Trump. She didn’t win the presidency because of our electoral college system, but if it had gone strictly by national numbers she would have been in.

    Trump is turning out to be a disaster because he doesn’t understand that he’s in a whole different environment, which has no relationship to either television or urban real estate. If he had surrounded himself with experienced advisors, he might have done a decent job, but that’s not what he’s doing – most of his picks are fellow rookies. Ben Carson is a wonderful, gifted neurosurgeon, but what does he know about housing? Tillerson was a competent, successful business executive, but what did he know about diplomacy? It’s not true that if you can run a business you can apply the same principles to running a government department. It’s two very different skill sets.

    I feel sorry for Trump. He doesn’t seem to enjoy being president very much. But the real danger is for Israel. Who is going to defend us against the BDSers if not the US? If the US loses international credibility, we’ve lost our greatest supporter.

    in reply to: Should Donald Trump be Crowned King of the United States? #1488272
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Oh, and Joseph – congratulations on a really first-class piece of trolling. I haven’t had time to read the thread carefully yet, but it looks like it’s going to be really interesting.

    in reply to: Should Donald Trump be Crowned King of the United States? #1488268
    Midwest2
    Participant

    Has anyone noticed that in most European countries – including Great Britain – the monarch “reigns but does not rule.” In other words, they’re figureheads, showpieces that have very little actual say in the government but just serve as icons to show who “belongs to our team.” The US President, on the other hand, is one of three co-equal powers in the US Federal government.

    I don’t think Mr. Trump would consent to having his powers reduced to mere symbolism.

    in reply to: Annoying Shidduchim Questions #1483215
    Midwest2
    Participant

    batHH – I can’t believe that I’m defending Joseph, but that’s a real question if you’ve ever lived in Israel. Jews from Europe used to refer to Jews from Arabic countries as “black,” and assumed they were all culturally and socially backward. When I was in Israel just after the SIx-Day War the ethnic divisions were really strong and divisive. I think things have normalized a bit, but it really bothered me then.

    I fully understand you’re being appalled by your friend’s statement. In a way it illustrates how we can become assimilated without even recognizing it. We’ve picked up some unfortunate attitudes from the non-Jews around us. Gently point out to your friend that people aren’t color-coded for personality, intelligence or ruchniyus, and that you find her assumptions hurtful (not to mention illogical).

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