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I think that if young people are going to watch movies/tv/etc, their parents have the obligation to investigate what they are watching and determine if appropriate.
A 7th grade BY girl watching movies can be depressing. BUT I am more depressed about the deceit of hidden tv’s, pretending not to watch, and the fake frumkeit. I’m sure some feel that if people know that they have a tv, that will hurt their shidduch status. But learning to be not yashar is far worse. Hacol bidai Shemayim (including shidduchim), chutz m’yirat shemayim.
Mike,
I’m sure most don’t know that Mr Rodgers, A”H, was a Christian minister.
Most of us are good at behaving in a controlled situation. People are ready for the regular stuff on a date. The trick is to see them when something unexpected happens, like cleaning up instead of relying on the hotel staff (see above). How to shake things up (espically without looking bad) is not easy?
I knew an older gentleman who had a friend (ben brit) seriously dating an Aina Yehudia (about 65 years ago). The man who was dating said that the girl’s family were not at all against him for his religion. To which, my older friend said that the next time he is in the young girl’s parent’s house to drop a drinking glass and pretend it was an accident. Well, he did, and all kinds of words came out. That ended that.
I would like to think that the reason that we disagree sometimes is because we care about each other. That being said, sometimes you want to be without someone caring telling you their opinion.
Look at the beginning of Shemot. It does not say that we were enslaved to build pyramids, but rather “store cities”.
Occasionally, I learn some Baba Miseh.
Thank you.
We need you guide us.
That reminds me of the story where a boy comes home and tells his mother he is a married man in the school play. She demanded that he go back to the teacher and request a speaking role.
Refuah Shelaimah
This thread is called the mens thread, but it is full of women. It only goes to show that women can’t follow directions.
I used a travel iron in a hotel once. I had catered double-wrapped meals that I could have taken to the (traif) kitchen. But I did not have the patience nor the faith that they would not unwrap it, so I warmed it up myself.
I use a cordless shaver from the Blumenkranz list (from a few years ago). It has a weak battery, so I have to plug it in almost always to get a good shave. Otherwise it starts to pull instead of cut. Ouch!
BTW, women can use their own shavers.
Descartes once walked into a restaurant. The waiter offered him some soup, to which Descartes said, “I think not”. Poof! He disappeared.
I just want to mention that many of these little lobsters in the water are big enough to see. When grown they are “about 0.8 mm (males) and 1.4 mm (females)”.
http://www.oukosher.org/index.php/articles/single_print/2346
It was mentioned before that NYC, Boston, and Seattle are the large cities that don’t filter their water. When I visited Seattle about 6 years ago, I asked Rabbi Kletenik, head of the Seattle Vaad, about the copepods (“little lobsters” as I call them). He told me then that the water was tested and they found no bugs. I recently heard in the name of Rabbi Hillel David that one does not need to filter the tap water in Seattle, but one who wants to be extra careful (I forgot the exact lashon, maybe I heard “baal Nefesh” or “yirai shamayim”…) should filter.
I prefer anonymity, but otherwise yes.
B”H nothing too bad for me. Just a few bad attitudes. Persevered for an hour or two or three.
I’m impressed. What a good group !
Be careful though. When a minority gets attention, esp Otanu, it can be a mixed blessing. Yosef intoduced some of his brothers to Paro and then sent them to Goshen to avoid being in the public eye.
I attend a Shiur in Kiddushin weekly with the local Rosh Kolel.
Brachot by myself, R”H with a Chavruta
B”N Yevamot after Berachot
I use k-9 internet filter and it forces safe-search.
Maybe that could help you
dunno,
You said
MDG
Now I’m confused. Are you a guy or a girl?
Why are you confused? because I can suggest a color?
I’m just trying to help you look conservative, while not wearing black. In interview books, they suggest conservative colors for mens suits such as dark blue and dark gray. I was passing along such information.
No, I don’t like it.
Amazing story of Hashgaha Pratit. He really knows how to tell a story.
Heard it on http://www.simpletoremember.com
1. Can you really see a person’s true colors during dating?
Yes, but it takes time. You want to see the person in different situations. Things to ponder:
Kiso – What do they spend money on? Or not spend on? How much tsedakah do they give? What are their aspirations financially?
Kaaso – What makes them upset (what makes people upset is usually what they have an interest in)? How do they react then? How do they deal with stress?
Koso – How are their table manners? Do they like to drink? Any good Purim stories?
2. Did you receive accurate information about your spouse from references?
I did little reference checking. I found it to be near futile, as most girls that I dated were several years out of B”Y and several years into career/college. I found that most girls don’t have a strong kesher with a rav/rebbitzen and their ref’s were usually vague.
mytake, welcome to the CR, and may H’ grant you success
dunno,
I did not know how hard it could be to look natural.
Have you ever thought about (dark) navy blue? It can look almost black.
My brother once said to me, “You can have any girl that you please. The problem is that you don’t please any girl.” Knowing that he was right, I was not too judgmental. I finally got one that I could snooker… um… I mean please.
But I do have to agree with you that men do know what they like, even if they can’t articulate it.
Sac and other ladies,
Most men have no idea about all the makeup stuff you talking about.
I think that most men are not so particular about hair style either, as long as it’s clean and kempt. As far as I know, most men like longer hair.
I always felt that I should call for at least 10 minutes – up to 30 – before actually meeting. If you got nothing to talk about for 10 minutes, then 2 hours will be painful. If there was some chemistry on the phone, then it was worthwhile to go out.
I always liked longer first dates as the facade wears off. It’s really hard fake it for 3+ hours, and the real person comes out. I also liked to go out to eat on a first date, as I prefer good table manners.
I think that certain things that effect middot are hereditary, like various hormones. For example, an active person with a lot of adrenaline may pass that trait to a child.
This is the old nature vs. nurture debate.
They are great in cholent.
I have gotten frozen sweet potato french fries, and they are really good. For whatever reason they have an OU whereas most regular french fries (national or store brands) have a triangle-k.
The best tobacco pipes are those not lit.
When they are rather long, I skim them, unless later posts refer to them, then I have to read them to understand the later posts.
Overstate and bore, understate and score.
Actually, when you don’t have moderators the whole message board goes down hill fast. Look at the Yahoo comment section; it became infested with trolls. Even Yahoo shut it down for a couple years.
I think that when Cedarhurst said “If your not Ashkenazi you can have more than one bashert (or be one of several basherts for your husband.)” she meant that Sefardim are technically allowed to practice polygamy. Although, it is frowned upon and illegal in the West (and consequently against halacha).
metrodriver,
Most men’s clothing is pretty simple. Hair is short and easy to brush or comb. I can feel where to shave. Beyond that I don’t worry.
As far as other things being not in place (like food on the face):
1) we generally know if something is amiss.
2) I have a wife. All men make mistakes, but married men find out faster.
it could be YeeOosh, it could be laziness. it could be bad upbringing.
Easy answer – don’t look in the mirror.
I spend almost no time looking in the mirror at myself – maybe one minute total per month. And the few seconds here or there is usually not intentional. I’ve been doing it for over a year now.
My bathroom scale scale is another thing. It’s kinda rude. I step on it to show it who’s boss, but it gives me a rude response.
You can put location in your profile. Mine is there.
Some people justify their lack of carefulness with public property because people expect public property to get used more and wear out faster.
If I remember correctly the Rambam, in the fourth perek of Hilchot Teshuvah, says that stealing from the public is a sin that is very difficult to rectify.
She has not posted in a few days, including erev Shabbat and Shabbat, so I would not necessarily say that she left.
PBA,
With Justice Sotomayor?
Maybe that’s the cause of the bad name 🙂
simcha613,
As you said the RambaM , Maimonides, does not include (in his seifer Hamitsvot) living in Israel to be a Mitsvah Chiyuvit – a Mitsvah that we are obligated to do. It seems that he feels that it’s a Mitsvah Kiyumit.
I was talking about the RambaN (Nachmonides). In his commentary at the end of the RambaM’s Seifer Hamitsvot, he talks about the national mitsvah of conquering the land. He uses the conquer no less than 11 times in the first 2/3’s of the paragraph. But in the last third of the paragraph he changes gears and says that even today there is a mitsvah on every individual to inherit the land and live there. He does not mention it as a national mitsvah, nor does he use the verbiage of conquering. It seems to me that he holds this in deference to the 3 shevout.
<joking>
The Ervat Davar is the hair.
Therefore, if a lady shaves, she need not cover her head.
</joking>
In the beginning of the Choshen Mishpat in the Aruch Hashulchan, around siman 3-4, he mentions one of the 3 shevuot as a halacha.
Even the Ramban, where he codifies the Mitsvah of living in Israel (at the end of the Rambam’s sefer Hamitzvot) says that today there is a Mitsvah for each individual to inherit the land. This appears about 2/3 down in the paragraph. It seems that he felt that there is the halacha of Lo Yaalu BiChoma
cherrybim-
Please be careful with what you write. The truth hurts 🙂
The Shulchan Aruch says that women must cover their hair in public (Even HaEzer 21). Rav Moshe had a heter only for shidduchim.
A while ago, I saw a divorced man go without a Talit. When I asked why, I heard because he was divorced. I guess there are different minhagim.
Why do in-laws not let go?
An answer can be found in the Ramban’s commentary on the passuk in Beraisheet, where it says that a man shall leave his parents and cling to his wife. A son/daughter will cling to their other half, and the two halves make one unit together. They will cling to someone who is really part of them. In that respect, they are related to each other than their parents. That makes some parents rather unhappy.