Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
He was being sarcastic but it’s kind of an interesting twist…
DaMoshe: you confused me for a minute, I thought you were responding to your own post. Well, you really should have. No correlation between Tomer Devora and Square town or it’s Rebbe. And no matter what Super powers you’d like to ascribe to “the higher ups” it’s all in your mind…
Do you even know the cause of this fire that you’re jumping to such hasty, negative conclusions; and sticking to it despite being refuted?
The eBay listing has been removed, perhaps he reposted it. Did you actually see the listing, not a screen shot?
Don’t actually say you disagree. Just state your opinion. For example: Hmmm, that’s interesting. I always thought…
Sorry, AZ didn’t start this thread. My mistake.
I also got the computer call a while back. The guy had an Indian accent so I started bugging him about where in India he’s from, with him not understanding and arguing that he’s calling from Texas… I tried getting on his nerves, but I think he was more successful at annoying me. His comprehension was zero, and he was way too dumb to realize he’s being played.
If you’re an unmarried guy I’d say it comes with the territory.,.
In fairness to AZ, regardless of what’s causing a gender imbalance, anything done to reverse the tide is a positive thing. You don’t necessarily have to find the cause, as long as the numbers start shifting, it can build on its own momentum.
So the question really should be can project Nasi empower YOUNG girls in general to be less desperate as there’s hope for a level playing field? Or will it sow more panic and prove to them that getting older is costlier and riskier, so they better marry ASAP? That’s the unspoken argument here IMHO. AZ thinks he’s started a new thread with a blank slate, it’s kind of impossible when the players aren’t new.
I canceled my request, sorry about that, it’s been approved. Thanks.
Mods, please, the second post is kind of irrelevant without the first. It’s not THAT long.
you don’t have any other posts in the queue. Are you using a different username?
Scratch my comment about what’s likely causing a discrepancy by non Chasidim. Although I personally believe the age gap theory to an extent, it doesn’t have to be the only, or even primary cause. Rigid requirements by bochurim such as demanding financial support (if not they can date younger, which by chasidim Nadan is only a minority issue) can also play a role. The thing in common is that once the numbers are out of whack for whatever reason, it becomes a vicious cycle. I’m not taking a stand, so you guys can keep on fighting if you so desire…
It’s kind of funny watching you guys “interpret” my words while I’m no navi or anything and am B”H alive. I’ll try to help you out a little…
I wrote “Now here’s the monkey wrench: since generally the girls have the upper hand, they’re usually first. It’s not just a numbers game, but a quality issue…” In retrospect I should have written “but ALSO a quality issue”. It’s not one or the other. Meaning that even if there are the same number of boys and girls entering the market, a shadchan will hesitate to suggest a shidduch that’s imbalanced, so she’ll go to the better party first. Since there are more quality girls, the girl gets to answer first. (as an aside a confident shadchan will sometimes suggest to both parties at the same time). There is always a breaking point of a totally unacceptable shidduch, which these guys stay behind in cumulative numbers, as the girls take younger, better guys instead. That’s where quality comes into play. Even if the numbers at every age group are equal (and I honestly don’t know) some guys (more so than girls, not exclusively) are unacceptable to most and they get left behind. Because of the stragglers there are now more boys on the market, so the girls have the upper hand even more than before. In the same way the age disparity is likely causing an imbalance by the non chasidim favoring the guys, the quality imbalance is causing a reverse age disparity by the chasidim, with the girls gaining the upper hand. In the past a girl taking a younger boy was almost unheard of, not anymore. Just my two cents.
Akuperma: Most local retail stores are small by design. Yes, one can open additional stores or sell online, but it’s almost a whole new business. Same goes for most in the service industry from electricians to painters. It’s not always wise or possible to expand because of additional overhead, logistics or market conditions, and those in the field are usually realistic in their expectations.
DY: my observation makes sense because only about 10 percent of the guys – the cream of the crop – actually have the upper hand. Another 25 percent of boys are “mazeldik” or more realistic and get engaged fairly quickly. The average 50 percent struggle a little, 12 percent are stragglers to one degree or another and the remaining 3 percent or so are “stuck” hopefully not indefinitely. Working boys especially have a very hard time. My numbers are just “guesstimates”, totally unscientific.
There is no actual age gap as far as I know, just individual circumstances dictate when one will be married. I can’t say it holds true for all chasidim, there are probably age differences among groups. Generally speaking parents of boys want to see them married off fairly quickly as the nisyonos nowadays are great. Girls are a bit “safer” but it also depends on where she lives and on the girl herself. So if the girl can bide her time, she can be more selective as well.
Most shadchanim by Chasidim suggest the shidduch first to the party least likely to say yes (to minimize hurt feelings). Alternately, if the shadchan knows one side really well and isn’t afraid to offend, he’ll suggest it there first. Now here’s the monkey wrench: since generally the girls have the upper hand, they’re usually first. It’s not just a numbers game, but a quality issue. The general consensus is that there are more “good girls” than “good boys” (and that it’s easier for a girl to be considered good). Also, the concept of Nadan was left in Europe, except if the bochur is a real “illi” and his family is top notch.
Disclaimer: I haven’t been involved with shidduchim for a while so my observations may be outdated.
WIY: so what about more mainstream stuff like fish oil (omega Derech mentioned) or B complex? The benefits of some supplements are easier to understand than others, especially if one is deficient. And the risks seem negligible. I don’t bother, but I wouldn’t laugh off someone that does.
I hear what you guys are saying about teaching them to fit in, but don’t they have a lot on their plate to absorb as is? It’s also hard to infringe on someone’s sense of style, when he/she has already given up most of his/her prior lifestyle. And it needs to be done without confusing them about the sometimes subtle differences between tznius/Halacha and community norms.
I’m not saying you guys are wrong, but it’s no simple feat, and also needs to be done at the proper time.
And PBA, I don’t think one may refuse a ger simply for being weird, which does not necessarily equate insincere. Most weird adults (not davka geirim) I know remain weird forever, so generally speaking they’re stable in their own right.
And don’t take this the wrong way as I’ve never met you IRL, but you do project some weirdness here, so hypothetically would you be me’gayer yourself?
Huge Mazel Tov!!! Are you going to post an invitation to the wedding here? JK…
When did you hear from Aurora lately? Do certificates, whatever they are, need to be renewed? Just a little worried about her.
There was a recent debit card hacking scam. I don’t know which companies were effected. It was mainly cash ATM withdrawals but not exclusively.
Doesn’t it have some connection to Kedushas E.Y.? Why can’t there be different standards for different places? Can somebody in the know please clarify.
Secular education in E.Y. was banned way back when they came in form of “gymnasiums” IIRC. And major funding was forfeited, rightfully so, as the goal then was assimilation. We don’t truly know what their end-game is now, so things aren’t as different as they seem.
Goque, nothing to apologize for regarding your taste buds…
And Torah, isn’t the minhag regarding Wednesday night? How many of you eat milchig on Wednesday?
Kosher sushi is kosher because it uses kosher fish. There’s a lot of info online on how to prepare salmon. For safety reasons it legally has to be frozen for 72 hours (in a commercial freezer) to kill any parasites before selling it raw, so it’s not exactly fresh. I would think the sushi places buy it frozen for this reason, but I’m guessing here.
To taste good I think the trick is to soak the salmon for a short while in a vinegar mix. Look up recipes as I don’t remember the exact details.
You can also buy kosher frozen sushi grade tuna, which saves you the worry about parasites. And since it’s probably frozen when really fresh, it may actually taste better than something questionable, or supermarket salmon.
Thanks jbaldy.
Goque: aren’t black olives a staple of a Greek salad? I’m considering making one for Shavuos and can’t decide if I can skip it or not – trying to please everybody….
Unless you are talking about someone else, that story was a Purim hoax that even YWN posted, then quietly deleted.
Does anybody else have a problem with QB forcing you to update every two years or so if you want to continue using their online features (e.g. backing up data – which costs extra – email…)?
If I don’t want to upgrade, what are my best ways to get these or similar features in conjunction with QB elsewhere? I really feel safe with their backups, because if anything goes wrong they don’t just give you the data back, they help you restore it and iron out the glitches. For emailing invoices and reports I think there’s a way to use your own software such as Outlook, but I’m not sure if it works totally without QB service.
I really would like to stay with QB, not that it’s perfect, but they are making it very costly to continue. I think this is another form of software piracy, basically stealing back what I already paid for… Their upgrades aren’t that great, so they force it on you.
WIY: Perhaps we aren’t worse off financially in actual dollars and cents, but if you compare the current standards coupled with the high cost of living (especially in NY) times are very difficult indeed. What makes it hard to compare is that debt is much higher today than it used to be. People (and government) spend what they don’t have so it appears that we have plenty, but it takes an emotional toll, which is more insidious. Mosdos also have to supply more, utility and labor costs constantly rise, so it’s a constant struggle to remain afloat for them as well.
Also, I’d like to heart your opinion in 10-15 years from now when you’ll hopefully have a growing family to support.
el al is saying that this photo may be 10 years old, yet the whole world is up with this. Maybe we are the fools?
On another note there was a photo circulating of a woman shopping chol hamoad, talking on her cell phone, wrapped in what else – a plastic bag. (I have no clue how it remained useful, perhaps she poked some holes.) At which point do we care more about others may think – and nowadays publish – versus what we believe to be right?
Kosher diet delivery it is. I don’t know anything about it, I just googled… The hechsherim look very good. Check it out.
The idea of sem is for you to grow spiritually. Don’t go somewhere that will hinder your growth just for the sake of going. Find something that’s in line with your hashkafos locally, take a job, a course, volunteer, in whatever combination seems right to you — with proper guidance. If you do it right you’ll gain more than you would in sem. Stay positive!
I find it hard to believe that in a country with such rigid laws (i.e. a king’s decree is final even if he later realizes he made a mistake) that such a powerful, harsh king would think twice before executing someone.
This argument is ridiculous. Personally, I think the best way to rate a restaurant is the way your stomach feels the day after. Very few make the cut.
Generally speaking expensive restaurants have very heavy food, which combined with more courses are not stomach friendly. Fast food places may have unhealthier food but the quicker pace and lack of variety generally total less junk. However, if one is very disciplined a good restaurant does offer the possibility of a healthy meal, while with fast food places it’s usually harder.
Just behave like a Jew. Practice “vahavtu l’reiachu kumuchu” (zeh klall gudol baTorah) and you’ll be accepted here. Ironic how you’re getting a taste of your own medicine.
He’s really anti-religious and beyond reason. I remember once hearing him scream at a caller for saying that Jewish law prohibits one from killing another person not in self defense. This was regarding the Holocaust if a Nazi forced a Jew to kill someone or be killed himself. He started a rant about Rabbis being to blame that so many Jews died, and that one should have killed instead. I wanted to retort, but I wasn’t the caller, that that’s exactly what the Germans claimed – they were only following orders… (And there was no guarantee that the Nazi whould keep his end of the deal either.)
I didn’t listen to the show in question, I’m just trying to illustrate that he’s not as smart as he whould like us to think, and a huge bigot. We have a tough PR issue to deal with regarding metzitzah b’peh, but I’d be more concerned in getting through to the pols. than him.
The other thread mentioned the name as Shpringer, so what’s going on? And how well known was he really if his name was wrong, at least someplace?
zdad: it seems we agree on this one. What I’m saying is that you can’t deny an “ethnicity for minhagim” exists simply because it originated elsewhere. Or else we’d all be exactly the same in our practices (or languages).
I was obviously wrong about the term Prussia. I did find this on Parnes.net on the history of Hungarian Jews:
“Internal Life during the 19th Century
In origin, spoken language, and cultural tradition and customs, Hungarian Jewry was divided into three sections: the Jews of the northwestern districts (Oberland) of Austrian and Moravian origin, who spoke German or a western dialect of Yiddish; the Jews of the northeastern districts (Unterland) mostly of Galician origin, who spoke an eastern dialect of Yiddish; and the Jews of central Hungary, the overwhelming majority of whom spoke Hungarian. In the classification of the inhabitants according to nationality, the overwhelming majority of the Jews in Hungary declared themselves members of the Hungarian nation;”
So basically the concept of Oberland existed, as Hungarian Jewry was somewhat of an amalgam of Jews from different origins. As I understand it the more assimilated lost their connection to either East or West, and the rest were classified as Polish or oberland. Then chassides was added to the mix…
You can contend that oberlander are really German Yekkes, similarly to the anti-Yiddish crowd (no offense, it’s just an illustration) that claims Yiddish is only a different dialect of German– it depends how far back you chose to go.
I’m not enough of an historian to argue, but Oberlanders probably encompass more than Hungarian, more like Prussian, which I believe would include the former Czechoslovakia and Austria. But then we get back who who is a Yekke, only German Jews or Austrian as well?
And in the real world moving affects minhagim, or else we’d all have the same nusach, same headgear etc.
Even of someone is meticulous with his minhagim, when he moves and the new local Rabbi institutes a new tekanah he must follow it, and he may not do differently than the tzibbur in many instances.
Health: what’s a Hunk? I suspect you’re wrong, but please explain first…
Health: sometimes silence is actually golden. Did you appreciate — when you were married — that people complained about your wife to you? It doesn’t matter if you’re right or not, let it go.
Right, that’s why he wants to convert, he’s not Jewish but because his father “converted” he’s an Israeli citizen. And practicing some mitzvos.
However you are correct if you are implying that he may not yet “fully” practice Shabbos. Which he probably isn’t if his understanding of hilchos Shabbos is limited.
After hurricane Sandy, most people would be wary to buy a house in Bayswater.
Also, before considering places not driving distance to NY, you have to consider how often you’d want to visit family, and how much airfare would cost for a hopefully growing family.
Kosher food is also more expensive out of the tri-state area, it’s not just about the mortgage.
Rebdoniel: I haven’t try this myself but you should be able to evaporate milk by cooking off more than half of the liquid on a low flame without letting the milk come to a boil. This per my internet research… Good luck!
A part of the above mentioned article:
There’s actually a recent British article “How sushi can make you fat”. Especially our Western version is full of simple carbs, salt and even sugar (in the soy sauce) with very little protein or nutritional value.
It’s a very informative read.
Where do you get that he spends all his money on NYC? If I remember correctly he donated a lot recently to some global cause with Bill Gates.
But that’s irrelevant in any case. Adding regulation upon regulation isn’t good for business or residents, enforcement costs money as well and it eventually hurts New York’s bottom line.
I hope you realize that what mercury is saying happened to her is NOT what you’re saying at all. Don’t be mislead.
From what you’re describing, the not letting yourself in a nutshell = fear of committing.
As long as you didn’t know he was serious you were easygoing and enjoying yourself. Now that it apparently is up to you, you’re afraid, because if you fall for him emotionally, that means marriage. Marriage is a big deal, so your defense mechanism kicks in.
I’d say go for it, but I’m not wise or informed enough to say so.
Good luck either way!
Okay, I apologize — I’m sorry if I offended you.
Mods, please remove personal information.