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“I’ve been known to take some water with my medicine before davening on Shabbos morning when my eye infection acts up.”
The Shulchan Aruch (89/3) specifically says that both water and medication are okay, so I think you’re well-covered here.
“Have we come to a consensus about potato peelers yet?”
It’s a machlokes (well at least on Shabbos).
Boruch Hashem, I have, bli ayin hara, never been attacked or threatened by a mouse. And they certainly have never barked at me, unlike some of the people and all of the dogs I have ever met. That is why I am scared of some people, all dogs, and no mice.
LB – YOU GOT IT RIGHT !
ok, so it took you three guesses…. but better late than never!
She is afraid of elevators and riding on busses, but not of lightning. At least she wasn’t a few months ago when I was taking her to the park and she saw it for the first time and asked me what it was. I didn’t mention that it was dangerous so I guess she didn’t know to be scared. I just told her that it’s something we make a bracha on because it’s Hashem’s wondrous creation or something like that.
And then I told her that it was time to go home.
Thank you. I realized this after I posted about my confusion – I thought my posts were all disappearing into cyberspace.
Better than which way? I liked the “Awaiting Moderation”. Is that what you are referring to? What’s the problem with that? Or do you mean the fact that not-yet-moderated posts were showing up in “Latest Coffee Room”?
The last I checked the chiyuv of “הוכח תוכיח” only applies to Issurim. Otherwise, it’s אונאת דברים
Sure they will. I once had a dog stick its teeth in me, although it let go when I said the Shema.
And several people in my neighborhood have been bitten by dogs recently.
I’ve had dogs threaten me and run after me many times.
When I was a kid, a dog was threatening me once and I got away, but I heard from a neighbor afterwards that he attacked someone else.
I have often heard of dogs attacking people.I REST MY CASE!!!
Whoops! I got confused! 🙂 Maybe it was the fact that you wrote in negatives.
A kid goes to his father and asks him: “Dad, I’ve been wondering about something. Where did people come from?” Dad responds, “Well along time ago, some of the monkeys became humans.”
Kid then goes to Mom and asks: “Mom, where do people come from?” Mom responds: “Well, many years ago, G-d created Adam and Eve and we’re all descended from them.”
“So how come dad told me that we come from monkeys?”
“Simple. He was talking about his side of the family, and I’m talking about mine.”
I agree with DY.
btw, she uses the word smartphone in her first sentence.
I have called both Rav Shmuel Kaminetsky Shlita and Rav Reuven Feinstein Shlita. They were both very accessible (came to the phone right away and took time to listen to my question) and easy to talk to.
You can also send sheilas by mail to Rav Chaim Kanievsky Shlita. As far as I know, he answers all questions as long as you only send one at a time. If you are female, you have to either type it up or have a male write the question for you. Also, I think he doesn’t like long questions.
because she’s one of them!
WTP – post 895 is a continuation of a post that wasn’t posted yet.
RY – the vast majority of kids who go to Frum schools stay Frum. Kids who go to public school usually don’t, or at least became less Frum. Of course, there can be exceptions depending on both the kid and the school, but that is the exception, not the rule.
It sounds like your school was not the right place for you (or maybe it wasn’t a good school in general), but that doesn’t mean that you should have gone to public school – it probably means that you should have gone to a different Frum school.
Too bad you didn’t go to my school – not only can I not think of any Frum kids from my school who stopped being Frum, a very large percentage of the not-Frum kids became Frum.
My sympathies for your bad experiences 🙁
I hope you can find a way to undo any damage done and find an environment/community that you don’t need to be sheltered from. They do exist.SYAG, DY, and MW13 +1!
WTP – regarding asking a Rav, I would think that if you ask the question the right way – meaning, explain all your feelings and issues – and you ask the right Rav, he could advise you properly. Of course, finding the right Rav for these kinds of questions is not so simple since it takes a lot more than knowledge of halacha.
But if you can find the right person to ask, it would seem to me that it’s kidai to ask. For one thing, he may surprise you with his answer. But there was also another reason I suggested asking a Rav. If you find someone who is wise enough, he may have more of an answer than a simple “yes” or “no”. And it seems to me that may be what you need.
I can’t tell you exactly what that means, since I am not wise enough (and know nothing about smartphones), but that is why I feel you need a wise Rav. He may be able to either come up with a way that you don’t need it or come up with a way that even if you have to use it, you can somehow lessen the possible damage (and I don’t just mean filters – you don’t need a Rav to tell you about filters). And I just think it may help to talk to someone who has Daas Torah and wisdom. I certainly think it will be more helpful than a lot of the responses you are getting here.
Sorry that I can’t offer any other real advice. This is definitely not my area (Boruch Hashem!). I and most people I know do not work in fields that require much or any “technology”.
WTP – just to give you a general idea of the type of thing I was thinking of (in case c”v you can’t find anyone wiser): I was thinking along the lines of setting some kind of limit regarding how much or when or where you use the phone and/or saying a kapitel of Tehillim before (or before and after) each time you use it.
RY – I agree with SYAG that this doesn’t sound like you. Is everything ok?
Moderators: I just posted two posts, and they seem to have disappeared as soon as I posted them. Was that an accident or on purpose?
They don’t just come over and try to bite you for no reason like dogs do. And they don’t bark.
I grew up out of town and actually what I liked about it was the fact that it was way more sheltered than in-town is. But I think things may be different today in some ways. But in certain ways, out-of-town is probably still more sheltered than in-town is even today.
🙂
you’re all wrong – I’m scared of lightning and dogs, but not of mice.
Lightning and dogs are dangerous; mice aren’t. When I was a teenager, whenever we had mice in our classroom or the bungalow colony, I would catch them in cups and let them go in the woods. On the other hand, if I see a dog or lightning, I run away.
1. My niece is afraid of lightning.
2. My niece is afraid of elevators.
3. My niece is afraid of riding on busses.LB – I’m guessing you are not allergic to eggs, and you can’t whistle.
yeah, I think that’s been discussed before in the CR.
WTP – before you assume the battle is lost, maybe you should ask a sheilah about what to do? Do you have a Rav whom you can ask these kinds of questions to? If not, can you find one? (just don’t choose him only based on his location :))
“My wife and I were really happy for 20 years. Then we met.”
I want to hear! Please!!!
LB – what are you thanking me for?
Two are true, and one is false.
LF’s was a trick – it’s impossible for two of his sentences to be true and one false. It’s also impossible for one to be true and two to be false or for all three to be true or for all three to be false.
Where is it now?
FuturePotus – I know that in my case, I didn’t read the book davka because I was told not to. I read if for the same reason the mountain climber climbed the mountain – because it was there. I was a good kid who always did what I was told. I read the book despite the fact that I was told not to, and not because of it.
I agree with you that in some situations, making something into an issue makes it into an issue. But I don’t think that applies here for several reasons. For one thing, if something is really bad, then the “making it into an issue” argument is irrelevant. It is an issue; you are not making it into one.
Public libraries can be really bad places. I know that the Lakewood public library is full of shmutz and it is almost impossible to avoid. It is definitely not a place for a Frum kid.
You can’t compare supermarkets to libraries for several reasons. For one thing, in a supermarket, you don’t have to buy the treif food, but in a library it may be impossible to avoid seeing things that are inappropriate. For another thing, in a supermarket, you have to buy the food in order to eat it, but in a library, you can just take a book off the shelf and read it.
For another, as it’s already been said, most Frum kids don’t have a yetzer hara to eat treif, but many have a yetzer hara to read. This is not because it was made into an issue, but because for someone who likes reading, it is a natural yetzer hara (as I know too well).I was actually just about to point out that the term “sheltered” can mean different things. It can mean “not knowing things” or it can mean “not being exposed to things in an inappropriate way” (such as watching movies,etc.)
HockMaster, until I saw your last post, I was sure you meant the second meaning since having lived in Lakewood, I didn’t see it that way. But then again, it might depend who you know, and it’s all relative in any case.
If you had meant the second meaning, I would say it’s definitely better to be sheltered (and I think the Torah is quite clear on that). If you mean the first, I think it really depends on the person/family. I’m not sure if there’s a right or wrong here.
In terms of Yeshivas, everyone has to choose what’s right for him. There is no real right or wrong. The nisayon when one has a bad experience in one place and then finds a place that’s better for him is to remember that that doesn’t make the first place a bad place; it just means it wasn’t for you.
And by the way, there is no proof that kids who grow up more sheltered are more likely to go off the derech. I also don’t really believe that there are too many people who are so sheltered today that they don’t know enough about the world to realize that trash exists. I think it’s almost impossible to be that sheltered.
LB -BUZZ! wrong!
RY – when you guessed #3 was the lie, were you talking to LB?
RY – did you ever own a teddy bear to throw out?
Hock Master- in general, being sheltered is better. But everyone is different. That is why there are many Yeshivas for many types of kids. You have to go to the Yeshiva that is right for you.
My guess (although I could be wrong) is that the reason why being in a more “sheltered” Yeshiva didn’t work for you may be because you weren’t completely sheltered to begin with.
But whether or not that is the case, just because something didn’t work for you and doesn’t work for everyone doesn’t mean that it’s a bad system. For most of the kids I know who go to (or went to) Lakewood Yeshivas, it worked out great, and it was great for them that they were so “sheltered”.
But no one system will work for every single person. That would be impossible.
1. being sheltered has nothing to do with not living with your scars. It has to do with not taking on the scars of the outside world. You have enough of your own – you don’t need to add to them (I don’t mean you specifically – I mean all the “you’s” out there, inclucing me).
2. Children who are allowed to be children are more likely to be mature as adults.
1. I’m scared of mice.
2. I’m scared of dogs.
3. I’m scared of lightning.It’s impossible for two of them to be true and one to be a lie. (I realize that you already know that, LF)
“There are things for which one can not do Teshuva, but very very few.”
What can’t you do teshuva for? I was always under the impression that you can do teshuva for anything, although there may be things that it is very difficult to do teshuva for.
“If in the middle of a book, in Chapter 20 – just as the plot has thickened, the first clues are there to solve the mystery, there is a page which has some questionable content, a child will need an incredible amount of self control to close the book.”
Even I would, and I’m not exactly a child.
When I was around 12, my older sister had a book in her possession which she decided was treif so she didn’t want it in her room, so she put it in my room instead and told me not to read it (?!).
After I read it (and told her), she yelled at me for reading it. I thought that was ridiculous – hello, don’t put a book in my room and expect me not to read it!!!It actually wasn’t even that bad (and it even had a moral). I’m just making the point that you can’t put a book in front of some people and expect them not to read it, but I have never heard of a supermarket being a yetzer hara for anyone Frum.
it was supposed to be th link for post #480
in case that gets blocked: It was supposed to be the link for post #480
Personally, I think one of the reasons people are against marrying cousins is because they want their kids to grow up relating to their cousins as brothers and sisters, and once they do that, they can’t be a possible marriage partner.
I was wondering about that as well. I also didn’t think that R’ Yehuda HaChassid wrote about cousins.
I can’t say for sure since he has a long list and I haven’t memorized it, but I certainly have never heard anyone say that they are opposed to marrying cousins for that reason, even though I have often heard people say that they won’t do other things because of his takanos.
There are a lot of people who refrain from marrying first cousins, but the reasons I generally hear are either genetic or weirdnes (and in at least one case this was from someone who is makpid on some of the takanos of R’ Yehuda HaChassid, yet didn’t mention it as a reason not to marry a first cousin).
I’m guessing that the second is a lie.
“Why in the world not?” to both.
Joseph – I asked my mother in the end. She said that it’s not correct English; it’s a Yiddishism. She said that the correct way to say it would be: “There’s zero problem with…. , right?”
(funny how our responses were so similar. I guess I’m my mother’s daughter…)