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  • in reply to: Does anyone know if there is such a statement….? #1195192
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    Thanks for your wisdom 🙂

    1. “The fact that our kesher with Hashem is important does not mean that halacha is not important and should not be used as an excuse to criticize people who feel that their Avodas Hashem involves being makpid in halacha (and maybe even engaging in chumras on occasion). “

    lilmod ulelamaid: Yea those rabbis helped me shift my focus towards Hashem, which was a refreshing approach.

    2. “I know that you don’t do that, but there are those that do. “

    lilmod ulelamaid: I know 🙁 But the weird thing is that why is it okay for kiruv professionals to criticize people who aren’t observing Torah? I know that the whole Torah is Truth thing means that a Jew who isn’t observing Torah is not living properly. Yet it’s kind of judgey imho.

    in reply to: Moderators On Strike!! #1194709
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    As long as they don’t strike the rock

    in reply to: Turkey Dinner Tonight? #1195749
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    Are they talking about cassette tapes? Video tapes? Like VHS?

    in reply to: Marrying someone in recovery #1194584
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    Meow meow meow

    in reply to: Photoshopping tznius #1194894
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    “I think the reason why sometimes people have a problem with this might be because they feel that it is important that people know that some people didn’t dress tzniusly (in certain ways) then, so that they can “prove” that tznius in not so important, and it’s a modern-day invention.”

    lilmod ulelamaid: I can only speak for myself here. I cannot say why sometimes people have a problem with this. IMHO, photoshopping here is misleading, dishonest, and throws off one’s account of history.

    I’ve learned that today we don’t do such and such because the yetzar hara is even greater so we have more fences, or whatever it is. Back in the day, men and women used to eat together at weddings. Today there is more segregation. Do people also photoshop their 1920’s mixed-seating weddings?

    If photoshopping was necessary then why not put a disclaimer? Why not at least disclose that this photo was altered from the original?

    Celebrities are photoshopped. Thank G-d for the internet where we can at least see a few “before” pictures to remind us that we’re all human.

    I think that standardizing Jewish culture, Jewish living, and the Jewish people as some fixed practice adds pressure to conform and is quite eerie.

    IMHO, I would have more respect for my teacher if he or she said, “Back in the Day They Did So and So, and Today We Do So and So Because….” At least I can see that we as a people are learning and growing. If everyone was the same back then and we’re supposed to be just the same and they had problems then shouldn’t we expect the same problems? Wait maybe that’s not a good argument. Anyway. Sorry train of thought requesting new station.

    I would rather my teacher disclose the truth and give me the option to decide what’s best based on the evidence then be fed lies and either realize that no one can live up to that standard (not realizing that it never existed) and give up, or find out that the photos were photoshopped and have a festering scab inflicted by my alleged chinuch.

    I don’t know if that helps. Even the part about the rebbetzin not covering her hair was not meant to say, “Hey it’s not important.” It’s important to be honest about our truth. Isn’t it? Isn’t there a modest way to approach honesty?

    Children I understand are different. You cannot tell a not to eat the entire cake because it has too many calories. Maybe you don’t want your child seeing someone who eats an entire cake either.

    But is there an alternative? Making the child feel good about eating salad (not chocolate salad), fruit, healthy foods?

    Instead of discounting cake. Making untznius into an evil thing; maybe just highlight the good in what you’re teaching, and do it with love? Okay maybe not because sugar affects the brain like other foods cannot. Is that the same with nontznius? Yetzar hara?

    I don’t know. This is all theory and surely in practice it’s a whole different story.

    Was photoshopping used in love?

    Or did they photoshop out of fear?

    Does the intention make a difference? Maybe both are necessary.

    Thanks (sorry if this is all jumbled… it’s been a busy pre-Thanksgiving)

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194545
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    golfer: Yay!!!! Seriously so yummy. Will do 🙂

    in reply to: Does anyone know if there is such a statement….? #1195190
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    I’ve had rabbis tell me that people focus too much on religion and not enough on Hashem.

    If you want to get close to Hashem, then it’s through Torah. However, to just follow the rules without Hashem is taking Hashem out of Judaism [and G-d forbid removing Hashem from Torah-observance].

    People focused on being religious can end up spending too much time trying to out-chumra eachother and the whole kavannah and ohr of Torah is lost.

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194543
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    golfer: If you ate this combination you wouldn’t ask me if I was pregnant but where can you get more.

    Actually the flaxseeds mostly add texture. The vanilla ice cream with tortilla chips is pretty basic sweet and salty. Cayenne and cinnamon make it spicy and savory. The cold of the ice cream soothes the burn of the hot pepper.

    You’ve never heard of average non-pregnant people dipping french fries in vanilla milkshakes?

    —Pickles added is gross and stereo-typically pregnant. IMHO, this combo is mild compared to something like pineapple pizza.

    Also… chips in ice cream means no need for spoons.

    in reply to: Is today Thanksgiving or something? #1194618
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    Some sales start before Thanksgiving. Some stores are open on Thanksgiving and/or start Black Friday on Thursday. Walmart is notorious for being open 24/7 all week long, including Thanksgiving.

    in reply to: Photoshopping tznius #1194889
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    This applies to regular BT frum women today too.

    What if your grandmother is a baal teshuvah and grew up secular… She has no tznius pictures from age 3 to age 30. So no one gets to see the pictures of her with family growing up because they weren’t tznius? It’s sad because family is a part of our history. At the same time, I understand that seeing affects the neshamah and we must guard our eyes.

    It would def have to be a Jewish woman photoshopping, right? Or someone who isn’t Jewish. Or what if a secular Jewish man photoshopped it (though I don’t think that’s permissible, since it’s akin to putting a stumbling block before someone who is blind).

    takahmamash: In Kiryat Sefer, do the chocolate Maccabi’im also wear suits and black hats?

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194541
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    Guessing you never had vanilla with tortilla chips, cinnamon, cayenne pepper, and ground flaxseeds

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194539
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    RebYidd23: You didn’t get the memo about vanilla going with everything?

    in reply to: Is today Thanksgiving or something? #1194609
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    Turkeys. Pumpkin pies. Potatoes and sweet potatoes/yams. Cranberries. Wine. Etc.

    Some people celebrate and others don’t. I don’t know how many frum people don’t celebrate Thanksgiving. Based on my Facebook feed and insider knowledge I know of at least four families who are enjoying the holiday.

    School and work is usually off on Thursday and Friday. Some leave early on Wednesday.

    A lot of people travel to spend the holiday with family. It’s not like in Israel where someone just drives from Haifa to Tel Aviv. Many people have to fly across the coast or country just to reunite with family (which brings in other stressors). Overall though it’s a nice opportunity to gather with mishpacha 🙂

    in reply to: Are foods we liked as kids have the same "geshmak" when we grow up? #1194840
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    Our taste buds generally become less sensitive as we grow older.

    “Your taste buds are actually replaced about every every two weeks! Most children have about 10,000 taste buds but as they grow, some taste buds stop being replaced. Adults often have about 5,000 working taste buds. This explains why some foods taste much more intense to children, and the decline in number of taste buds makes more foods palatable to adults as some food’s intensity isn’t tastes as strongly (Oureverydaylife).”

    Also the memories associated aren’t the same. Maybe you associated eating certain foods with family, after school, or during a time that you may look back today with nostalgia.

    That’s my best hypothesis. Recipes may change a bit, but I think it’s more both psychological and physiological.

    in reply to: Marrying someone in recovery #1194579
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    Amen! Thanks lilmod ulemaid <3

    You are amazing too and may you find your husband at the right time and have a healthy happy prosperous shalom bayis always relationship always 🙂

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194537
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    I’ve never had it.

    in reply to: Hummus Recall: Sabra (Issued Nov. 19, 2016) #1193748
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    iacisrmma: Good to know! Thank you

    in reply to: Why can't guys sleep late? #1197907
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    I once lived in a rural area where the roosters would wake me up in the morning.

    They say that roosters wake you up at dawn.

    Reality was 3am and pitch black outside.

    Men can be grateful that their not roosters.

    in reply to: My Deal With Hashem #1193781
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    lilmod ulelamaid: Thanks that explains why not only is it sold to someone who isn’t Jewish, but it’s either out of the house or stored away in some garage in black trash bags.

    I didn’t realize it was a sight-related thing.

    Interesting mamash

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194535
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    It’s a real ice cream flavor though.

    I wonder if it tastes better on Shabbos.

    in reply to: Is today Thanksgiving or something? #1194607
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    Thursday is Thanksgiving. Today and tomorrow is when half the people are aggressively grocery shopping. Others are traveling.

    in reply to: Do your children drive you nuts? #1193478
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    I heart the OP’s OP.

    in reply to: Introverts thread #1193445
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    I love this thread. It’s amazing to look into the past. Five years ago I had no clue that I would be reading this. Five years ago I had no clue about the CR.

    in reply to: Can I use Bounty paper towels? #1193740
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    What!!!!

    in reply to: Is Costco Worth it? #1193384
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    Costco is a secular holy site

    in reply to: Whats Your Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? #1194532
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    What’s up with cholent ice cream?

    in reply to: My Deal With Hashem #1193778
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    Wait what? We cannot even see chometz on Pesach?

    What about at the grocery store?

    Seeing someone eating a sandwich when you’re walking by an outdoor cafe?

    What if you’re a food photographer and the $25k Gluten Fest gig you booked falls on Pesach this year?

    in reply to: Boiling Newspapers #1193580
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    Depending on the volume and person, yes consuming oil straight up can cause vomiting…

    Reddit: *What would happen if I drank a cup of vegetable oil?*

    “A cup? That’d go right through ya, provided you didn’t promptly throw it back up. Your body can’t process much of the fat (though yes, it would process some) and much like how Olestra works in fat free chips, the oils got to go somewhere and there’s only two ways out.”

    In regards to a not-quite-human animal throwing up after drinking oil:

    “Cooking oil as you have found out can indeed cause vomiting and diarrhea. You may want to try some burnt toast and see if it absorbs some of the excess oil. However, greasy, fatty foods can cause pancreatitis. Symptoms of pancreatitis vary but include vomiting, diarrhea, anorexia, weakness or collapse, dehydration, shock, fever, depression, and upper abdominal pain.” (Jane Lefler, former Vet. Asst)


    Also, lead-based paint chips are totally different. They settle in the stomach. From what I’ve learned, children would gnaw or suck on them more than eat them like a bag of Lay’s.

    in reply to: Hummus Recall: Sabra (Issued Nov. 19, 2016) #1193746
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    May you and your family continue to be healthy and strong and experience only sweet and good effects from the hummus.

    The retailer ought to accept the return. If they do not because of having no receipt, then Sabra may offer direct reimbursements. And maybe not. Though you stated that you’re going to keep on eating; thus I gave you a bracha (just please say Amen).

    Random: Once I got a reimbursement from a frozen food company for the hair in my frozen strawberries. Hair isn’t trief. Only trifling.

    in reply to: coffee side effects #1195676
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    When I was a kid my mom made me “kid’s coffee.” It was the best!!!

    Kid’s Coffee Recipe:

    -A pinch of instant crystals in approx. half a cup of hot water

    -Two teaspoons of sugar

    -Milk until the cup is near full (can sub. with soy/almond/coconut milk)

    The Starbuck’s Frappuccino of Youth.

    Side effects: Love my Ema even more.

    in reply to: Would you date someone on anxiety meds? #1193349
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    “Not always! Your posts are always opposite from mine!”

    Health, lucky you!!!

    It’s Opposite Day 😉

    in reply to: How to make Schmaltz Herring #1193815
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    “There’s a huge cultural and emotional aspect to food that has nothing to do with how Hashem made our taste buds (although that’s part of it as well). ” (DaasYochid)

    I’m forever craving my mom’s matzah brie and jam-filled polachinkaz.

    in reply to: Children on leashes #1195913
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    YW Moderator-29: Thanks for your response. Okay so I don’t get it, but it’s okay to just wonder too. Sorry for making it awkward.

    lilmod ulelamaid: Thank you! Baruch Hashem may it always be a safe and happy place to acknowledge our mistakes and learn and practice better communication 🙂

    YW Moderator-29: Also maybe I am not thinking of the red flags because I’m really only looking at the pictures online, which show a happy child on a leash. I am not seeing the real-life scenarios where parents typically use these harnesses. ???

    Tangent: I wonder if I am too open-minded about this harness thing because I have a dog who wears a harness. It’s totally different than a child, who will someday become a regular adult human.

    Do children who wear harnesses outside have an easier time keeping their seatbelts on inside the car?

    in reply to: Testing testing 123 #1193226
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    Yepp I must have joined after you; I joined August 3, 2016.

    Remember when you said something about (correct me if I am wrong please) not seeing how it would make sense for someone to be on CR after he gets married if he has a billion things to do and his wife needs help around the house, etc… and how CR is a right now thing but maybe in the future this time will be spent with family or etc… ?

    Well it’s so interesting because then I noticed that some posters have been posting for 7 years. It’s closer to a decade than not. Or if someone was 24 now that person is 31. Where am I going to be in 7 years? Is CR going to be a regular thing in my life from now on?

    It’s so weird. This is the first time that I’ve joined an online forum thing. But I like it. B”H

    in reply to: Children on leashes #1195909
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    YW Moderator-29: “If someone uses a leash/harness to safely give a child space, that is very different from using a leash/harness in place of teaching a child safety, boundaries or to follow directions. Or in place of them learning it. It becomes a problem when it is arbitrarily used just because it’s easier.”

    Okay so is this the red flag? Where it may indicate a “parent problem” (takahmamash)?

    in reply to: Hummus Recall: Sabra (Issued Nov. 19, 2016) #1193744
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    Omgosh!!! I just got an email saying that the hummus that I bought in October was part of the recall. I really felt sick after eating it but I thought it was because I just ate too much salt and was stressed. It could have been both.

    A while ago I learned that I ate vegetables with listeria but I was okay because I cooked them long enough for anything to die.

    Is Listerine kosher?

    in reply to: Name That Tune! #1194355
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    Ooops I thought you said “Name That Spoon!” 😉

    in reply to: Name That Tune! #1194354
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    Table!

    in reply to: Boiling Newspapers #1193576
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    If we use vegetable oil to fuel our cars, does it need a hescher?

    What if we sometimes dip our celery sticks in the car’s oil tank, does it need a hescher then?

    in reply to: Boro Park Under Attack!! #1193196
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    Serious.

    I didn’t post the delivery date to guard it from the ayin hara. I’m praying that it will come in on time and safely and will bring me closer to Hashem 🙂

    Thank you. I appreciate your recommendation a lot.

    in reply to: Testing testing 123 #1193223
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    So interesting! I just picture half the people living in NY and then some in Israel. Then what, today someone said that he/she lives in London. That was news to me.

    “There is one poster who said that she thinks she knows who I am, and that I don’t know her but I know her friends. It’s funny because when I was at a certain friend for Shabbos recently, she started telling me about one of her cousins and in a lot of ways she sounded like this poster. There were a few things that I didn’t think fit, but it’s not impossible that it’s her.”

    So this had to have been in Israel then? It’s like you get to be undercover.

    You have a good memory. I think when I first started posting you referred to me as a guy. I was super flattered because I interpreted it as that my words meant something. Or at least someone heard my voice.

    Then I outed myself as a woman, which was nice because that’s when I started feeling more comfortable being myself. Speaking from my heart. And head.

    I don’t know even know how I ended up here. I was reading posts for a while and then one day I just jumped into the water.

    For some reason when I click on your name, it goes to an error page. So I cannot even see how long you’ve been here for, or your location, etc. It works when I click on other names though. Maybe you’re in an alternative dimension.

    in reply to: What's your go to nightime snack? #1193067
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    lilmod ulelamaid: Is that why you can stay up so late?

    The caffeine in chocolate doesn’t keep you awake?

    in reply to: Children on leashes #1195890
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    Maybe davka it works for frum couples who have more children to look after at one time than the average secular couple?

    in reply to: Boro Park Under Attack!! #1193194
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    “Thank you, your order has been placed.

    An email confirmation has been sent to you. Sign up for delivery updates by text for this and future orders.

    Order Number: XXX-XXXXXXX-XXXXXXX

    Outside Inside will be shipped to [lightbrite] by XXX XXXXX.

    Estimated delivery: XXX. XX, XXXX – XXX. XX., XXXX

    Review or edit your order:

    I just bought: ‘Outside Inside’ by Gila Manolson

    In a refreshing, straightforward style, the author of ‘The Magic Touch’ addresses the subject of tzniut,…” (Xxxxxx.com)


    lilmod ulelamaid: You just influenced me IRL. Thanks 🙂

    in reply to: Sorry… Another Gefilte Fish Thread… #1193038
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    Ohhhh!!! Because it’s not sweet you mean. And on Rosh Hashanah we’re supposed to abstain from bitter sour foods.

    Now I get it.

    Thanks Mammele for the clue

    in reply to: Sorry… Another Gefilte Fish Thread… #1193037
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    Good point.

    I only like the frozen cholent on a stick when it’s dipped in cashew pieces. Sometimes I like the kind with a chocolate core too. Either way it’s the cashews that really jazz it up.

    If you don’t want to eat them, gefilte fish chips can add an aesthetic touch when placed vertically on top of pies.

    They also can be smashed and placed as the crust in lieu of graham crackers. It’s actually printed in the latest *Spice and Spirit* cookbook.

    in reply to: Boro Park Under Attack!! #1193192
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    Only if it was processed (filtered and everything), so I doubt it.

    In contemporary times, processed honey lasts as long as we can measure it lasting. It would be smart if everyone put “3,600 gallons of processed honey in glass jars” on their baby registries.

    That way there will always be some to pass on to the next generation and so forth.

    When I was a kid my parents took me to the circus. That was when I had my first circus peanut (an orange marshmallowy candy).

    After my first bite, I realized that I had tasted the most delicious thing ever. By the second or third one I was disgusted. I had never tasted something so repulsive.

    I think taste buds lose sensitivity after consuming the same thing. That’s why people drink wine when eating steak. It cleanses their palate so each next piece tastes like their first. At least that’s what I learned in a shiur.

    That’s what I learned in that shiur about wine!!! Yay lilmod ulemaid!!! Thank you thank you thank you I forgot what that shiur taught but now it’s coming back. Or was that the shiur about soulmates? Dunno. But the point was that if we don’t know how to apply and use a proper bottle, or expensive bottle of wine, then we miss out on the reason it was created. Like if we live life without Torah.

    Boro Park is under a sack of potatos. Because Channukah is right around the corner.

    in reply to: Would you date someone on anxiety meds? #1193341
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    lilmod ulelamaid: <3

    in reply to: Testing testing 123 #1193221
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    kapusta: Yay yays 🙂

    lilmod ulelamaid: Thus far for all that I know you guys could be a fig newton of my imagination… Though it sounds super cool to know a CR-er IRL. B”H someday.

    Do you know anyone?

    in reply to: Children on leashes #1195887
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    1. Do you use a harness?

    N/A.

    2. Do you personally know people who do? If yes, are they Frum?

    N/A.

    3. Have you ever seen anyone use a harness?

    No but I have seen the leash bracelet thingy years ago. I only discovered that they actually made harnesses tonight after Googling it.

    4. Is this whole thing a joke or serious?

    Both.

    5. What is a harness anyhow? Never saw one – wouldn’t know what it was if I bumped into it.

    Google images may help. IMHO, at least from now on, if it crossed your path, you would recognize it.

Viewing 50 posts - 4,351 through 4,400 (of 4,708 total)