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  • in reply to: Minyan in Orlando #1292367
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    iacisrmma, so is that a “yes,” you’ve thought of it before?

    in reply to: Daytime babysitter #1292356
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    True that WTP! These early formative years could be better spent bonding with one’s parent than being shlepped to a stranger and developing attachment to a nonparent.

    Well said!! โ˜บ๐Ÿ‘ช

    in reply to: Living in two countries #1292339
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    bats = caves

    and spiders and dust

    in reply to: Quotes #1292326
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    “Lordy, I hope there are tapes.” James Comey

    in reply to: Minyan in Orlando #1292322
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    Have you ever thought about how the word, *Or*, is in Orlando? ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: A strange temptation? #1292321
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    Is the UK livestock thingy an inside joke in the CR?

    in reply to: Dealing with high pressure salesmen #1292320
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    Same with saleswomen

    in reply to: Dealing with high pressure salesmen #1292179
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    Say you cannot make the decision without first consulting with ___, and ___ is unavailable at the moment. So you will have to discuss it with ___ and will get back to the salesperson.

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1292106
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    WOW Nechomah!!! ๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ’“

    So far I’ve only read your post since last posting and omgosh!!!

    Yes. That very day when I talked to my rebbetzin she taught a class on tehillim and said that the way to combat the yatzar hara is to be confident in ourselves.

    That is such AMAZING Hashgacha Pratis that you just sensed that and elaborated on it for me here! Thank YOU Nechomah!!! ๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒˆ

    ——–

    Awww thank you everyone! This thread is one of those, “It’s not you, it’s me” moments. Thank you all so much!!! โ˜บโ˜บโ˜บ

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291817
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    Also maybe I have unrealistic expectations about the life of a.frum Jew. People are people, and even Jews are people. Just because someone is a frum Jew -Chassidic, non-Chassdic, and/or in-between – doesn’t mean that his/her every moment of living a Jewish life is spent skipping around harmoniously in the flow of serving the Creator.

    In part, maybe my ignorance is my lack of more exposure to FFB non-Chassidic Jews who have never greatly struggled to enjoy Yiddishkeit, and my greater exposure to Chabad FFB Jews and families who are FFB and BT (kiruv and non-kiruv) and have confided in me about how much Chassidus helped them overcome challenges.

    in reply to: A strange temptation? #1291818
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    Depends on who the strangers are and what you mean by “bizarre and/or amazing” (R4nd0m3x).

    I do that already on a more general platform to select strangers. Mostly the videos are of cute animals.

    Great videos:
    -The puppy eating a banana with two front paws, sitting up like a human.
    -The cat swatting at a German Shepherd, who *SPOILER* then starts licking his face.
    -The puppies going around in a circle as they eat sharing one round dish of food, as if they’re on some conveyor belt.

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291816
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    I’ll see what I can do! ๐Ÿ‘€

    in reply to: Owning and Walking a dog #1291815
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    Golfer, thanks!!! โ˜บโ˜บ๐Ÿถ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘!!

    Joseph, a smiley! So nice ๐Ÿ˜„!!

    RebYidd23, my dog is extremely particular about what he eats and where he chooses to roll. He only eats the soft fresh grass, often found hiding at the edges of fencing. It’s taller and thinner, and frankly for all that I don’t know – it may be weeds. Dry chicken bones and random crackers are special delicacies that sometimes walks bestow upon him.

    For the record, don’t children also get messy, playing in the mud, puking on themselves and their parents, and finding gnarly treasures outside too?

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291812
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    So taking into account LU’s and others’ posts, the answer in part is that frum Jews are going by the Emes in Torah and drawing inspiration from its universal teachings, accessible to Chassidic and non-Chassidic Jews.

    in reply to: Life Is Not Fair #1291810
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    Maybe Hashem needs you here to help those policies become more fair?

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291737
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    lesschumras, you have a right to how you feel and see it.

    I wouldn’t be here asking if I didn’t want to get to know other perspectives. I have gone to other orthodox shuls and talked to other orthodox rabbonim besides Chabad ones. So far I have not connected to other ways. I want to understand how it works for you.

    Wolf, yes somewhat!

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    Rabbi of Crawley, what does Geordie mean?

    I thought that it was a name up until Googling it a minute ago. Now I think it may mean someone from Newcastle, or a dialect.

    For months I thought that it was Georgie but then I went back and noticed it was a D not a G.

    The only thing that I’ve ever thought about Geordie613 besides being a nice poster in the CR was that sometimes I wonder if I can hear a British accent when I read Geordie613’s words.

    Can you hear our American accents Geordie613?

    in reply to: marriage jokes ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ˜‚ #1291664
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    bmyer, why the need for more marriage jokes? Are you in charge of a standup routine?

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291669
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    Joseph the weather is so moody today! Last night it sounded like a gust here and a shower there with this many knots. The automated guy went on and on in a monotonous voice and I simply had enough, so I hung up. Oh no, I didn’t even think about it until right now, but I didn’t even say goodbye, or thank you! I hope he forgives me.

    Anyway, do you want to switch weather forecasts? I’d like to trade in the next week for the opposite of what RebYidd23 wants.

    Thanks ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: Is working at a Kollel considered “working”? #1291645
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    LU, for the first post you said, “If you meant being a secretary in a Kollel (or something similar) that would be different. It would definitely be a big Mitzvah and a big zchus, but no one would refer to it as โ€œlearningโ€” (LU)

    You got it right! ๐Ÿ™‚ I meant “working in a kollel” like having a job that is like teaching. Is there only one Rosh Kollel per kollel? I would think like someone who may be teaching a class and has to learn as part of his job to teach as someone in the category of working in a (or at a) kollel.

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291643
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    GAON: Everything!

    In those times when I feel immense guilt after a shiur, it’s a whole bunch of doubting and judging myself.

    For example, a shiur talks about how Hashem gives us challenges and we’re supposed to thank G-d for everything. I think about how I said “no” to taking on another assignment because it was interfering with my health and I was doing too much “people pleasing” by saying “yes yes yes yes” to every request. Since asserting myself is challenging, I doubted myself after listening to this shiur (and not only this one) and wondered if I just should have done it because maybe Hashem wanted me to keep going (although I was actually doing the right thing but I felt wrong about it because I wanted to do more, no matter the expense, just like the shiur seemed to say when I internalized it – but it actually did not intend to say what I thought it did).

    Another example is when I listened to a shiur on dating and marriage, and feel like what am I doing caring about whether I have enough money to eat next month when I’m not even married yet?! I must not have my priorities together. This shiur says that I cannot fulfill my soul’s potential without being married and I am so caught up in survival that maybe I am missing out on my life’s mission. And after I talked to my rebbetzin about this guilt, she said that I need a livelihood and it doesn’t go against Torah to focus on a job, and to take it in steps, pretty much. So just because I am not married yet doesn’t mean that I am not doing enough or being enough, and I don’t have to feel guilty about it.

    My rebbetzin said it’s not like Torah is here, and the rest of your life is there. Torah enriches every part of your life, she explained. — Which made learning Torah and understanding the message way more digestible.

    Thank you! ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: Is working at a Kollel considered “working”? #1291648
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    LU!!!! Genius! So TRUE.

    Thank you!!!! Okay — just read your latest post and, WOW, yes! All in perspective what the point is in the conversation. All of a sudden, when you mentioned the wife and how her husband’s kollel job may be bringing in parnassah — I could see how that’s working, when the other day I for sure put it in the learning category!

    Thanks for showing me how definitions can be flexible ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: Why pickles are better than marshmallows #1291640
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    If pickles are better than marshmallows and 1 through 10 accounts for why, then wouldn’t that mean that cucumbers are better than pickles by this very logic?

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291616
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    Oh to answer your first question Midwesterner, it’s no. I did not.

    And the previous post explains what I did ask ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thanks!

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291612
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    Midwestener- Thanks for asking me to clarify my OP, because it was clearly taken mistakenly.

    I asked how do non-Chassidus frum Jews learn how to do Avodas Hashem on their? What do they learn that brings out their ahavas for Avodas Hashem?

    In the OP I stated: “how do frum Jews grow up loving and enjoying Torah without Chassidus?”

    My lashon hara comment was a reminder that this is not a forum to speak against Chassidus or compare Chassidus in a way that would be lashon hara.

    Does that make sense now?

    Thanks!

    in reply to: What’s the point in “real” jewelry? #1291042
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    There is an amazing true story a rabbi shared in a shiur!!!

    Husband and wife got married.
    Shortly after wedding they took a walk on the beach.
    They come back.
    The wife couldn’t find her ring! It wasn’t on her finger.
    Where was the ring?
    Shhh don’t tell family, we’ll find it.
    Went back to the beach. Looked everywhere.
    Told family. Both sides went searching.
    No avail! No ring! Husband’s family so angry!
    After that, every time husband and wife were with husband’s family, they put her down. “Oh I want to give you ….. but I know you’ll lose it, so I’m giving it to your husband so he makes sure that it doesn’t disappear” snark snark
    Wife felt so bad. Year after year. So ashamed.
    Many years many many years later, husband and wife go somewhere and husband wears same tux jacket from wedding night
    Husband finds wedding ring! Wife must have asked him to keep it safe before they walked on the beach! Was there safe all along! Wow!!!
    Wife vindicated!
    From that point wife makes fun of husband. Finds ways to put him down about being so forgetful. All this time she was the responsible one! Husband takes it without a word.
    Years later. Years years many years later! Husband and wife were in a financial bind. Wife wanted to sell the ring. Make the sacrifice for them.
    She takes the ring to a jeweler for an appraisal.
    She tells the jeweler it’s approximate value.
    Jeweler says no. No way. Sorry lady.
    Wife goes home and searches all around for the ring’s papers. She finds a receipt. The purchase of the ring was made right before she and husband went to that event where he wore the tux jacket!
    Confronts husband. Husband confesses. He felt so horrible at how ashamed she felt and how his family treated her that he saved up year after year to finally but her a new diamond ring.
    This ring was worth more than the first one!
    Wife said, “All these years I was so mean to you, and you said nothing when all along you knew the truth and kept it secret?!”
    Yes.

    in reply to: Almond milk #1291038
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    If you blend marzipan with water, would it taste like almond milk?

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291032
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    Naval Observatory – Gives you the seconds too! โŒšโ˜Ž๐Ÿ•›

    202-762-1069 EST

    719-567-6742 MST

    (Yays!!!) โ˜บ

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291030
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    OMGOSH!!! The time still exists!!! ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291029
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    Thanks Joseph!! I just listened to the weather. The automated guy even told me about the knots โ˜บ

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291021
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    Ahem… yeladim, so please remember this is a lashon hara free zone.

    Ooops!
    If you accidentally brought your lashon hara with you, one of our flight attendants will step in shortly to remove your baggage, for we cannot continue to go with such language.

    If you don’t know who you are, you probably still do, and if not, please reread your posts aloud as if you were speaking to your local Chassidic Rav.

    Thanks for choosing this thread! Enjoy your visit โœˆ

    in reply to: Do people still call to hear the time? #1291025
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    I remember it being a 100% free public service.

    If it cost money then my parents would have said something and/or told me to stop calling.

    I think I’ve called the weather one before, if that existed.

    Brb! I want to see if the weather one is real and still exists. โ˜”๐Ÿ’ง๐ŸŒžโ„โšกโ›…๐ŸŒˆโ˜

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291010
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    Wolf, wondering how non-Chassidic frum Jews are all happy and loving Torah and mitzvot without Chassidic teachings the outlook.

    This has nothing to do with legitimacy! No judgment here! Or comparison!

    I want to understand how Ahavas Torah and Avodas Hashem is taught to frum Jews in a way that is not “our job is to be happy and serve Hashem with joy…”

    Thanks!

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1291016
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    GAON, thanks for asking me to clarify.

    Basically to me, Chassidism is about bringing joy into serving Hashem and everything we do. Torah strengthens our relationship with Hashem and we must unite our hearts minds and actions with the proper joyful kavana when we perform mitzvot.

    Background: Recently I talked to my Rebbetzin about how sometimes when I listen to shiurim, I feel terribly guilty afterward. Even if I do more mitzvot after, I still feel horrible and like I don’t do enough or learn enough and am not enough.

    My rebbetzin said that I need to listen to more Chassidish shiurim, because Torah brings joy and light. It is not healthy if learning is making me distressed. Then it dawned on me, what shiurim am I listening to? When I listen to shiurim on Chassidut, I generally feel more inspired and positive afterward.

    Thus, I wanted to know how it is possible to be a non-Chassidic Jew – according to my perception/definition – and see Torah observance with love and positivity.

    Thank you

    in reply to: Owning and Walking a dog #1290961
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    A dog is a kelev, from kol lev, literally all heart. ๐Ÿ’–

    ๐Ÿ’– is high

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1290954
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    Yay! Chassidim are still going strong B”H ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’›

    Btw, Satmar is Chassidic? I thought they were Haredi.

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1290955
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    Like non-Chassidic Haredi

    in reply to: Daytime babysitter #1290956
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    Even if toddlers are playing side by side, doing their own thing, they’re still socializing.

    I don’t know about you, but I’ve definitely been with someone else in the same room independently working but still benefiting from being next to a peer.

    Toddlers may not necessarily appear to care, but they too need that stimulation. They are more aware of their surroundings than it appears, no?

    in reply to: Owning and Walking a dog #1290962
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    Many dogs help humans be better humans and fulfill mitzvot. My dog is a therapy dog and I’m B”H so blessed to have him in my life like this.

    Some people who degrade frum Jews who have a dog sadly may have never experienced the love and merit that dogs add to a person’s and family’s life.

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    ๐Ÿ“ฎ๐Ÿ“ฎ๐Ÿ“ฎ๐Ÿ“ฎ๐Ÿ“ฌ๐Ÿ“ฌ๐Ÿ“ฌ๐Ÿ“ฏ๐Ÿ“ฏ๐Ÿ“ฏ๐Ÿ“ฏ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ”ฏ๐Ÿ”ฏ๐Ÿ”ฏ๐Ÿ”ฏ๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ”๐Ÿ”โฐโ™ปโ™ปโ™ปโ™ป๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿก๐Ÿก๐Ÿก๐Ÿก๐Ÿก๐Ÿก๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿ—ปโ›ฒโ›ฒโ›ฒโ›ฒโ›ฒโ›ฒ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฃ๐Ÿฃ๐Ÿฃ๐Ÿฃ๐Ÿฃ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ„๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒโœ…โœ…โœ…โœ…โœ…โœ…

    โฌ†Chizzuk

    in reply to: How come all frum Jews today aren’t Chassidic? #1290927
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    RebYidd23,

    A) What do you mean?
    B) Why would you say this?
    C) How is this so?
    D) How can one say this? Hashem can make Chassidim the norm tomorrow.
    E) What about all the BTs who are Chassidic? And the already Chassidic Jews? Are there not many and growing?

    Thanks, and still wondering, where do non-Chassidim draw their Ahavas Torah and ahava for Avodas Hashem?

    in reply to: Daytime babysitter #1290926
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    Let’s say someone put two toddlers together from different families and these two toddlers are parallel playing.

    Is this still not socialization? They are still interacting and connecting with each other by their very awareness of not being alone, and not being the only person of their size. They may not be able to necessarily think this into words or thoughts, but they will be affected by being with a peer nevertheless.

    Have you not sat in the same room with someone doing your own thing – engaging on the computer, reading a book, snacking on food, talking on the phone, or even simply folding laundry – while the other person happens to be independently doing his/her own thing too? And have you never experienced this and nonetheless felt that you too somehow bonded by being in your own worlds together?

    I love being in the same room with one of my friends. We can both be working on our computers, with her doing graphic design and with me typing, and it’s like we’re in this own magical creative world. I don’t know how to explain it, but her presence really brings out my best B”H. Why can’t toddlers also connect on a level of being together? They may need it more than adults, or just as much.

    in reply to: Owning and Walking a dog #1290953
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    ๐Ÿถ Rabbi of Crawley: Yay dog power! ๐Ÿ• My rabbi is so amazing B”H! He let my dog eat in the sukkah, so wonderful thank G-d โ˜บ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿฉ๐Ÿถ๐Ÿ•

    in reply to: Is working at a Kollel considered “working”? #1290905
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    LU, thanks!! Okay so that validates my feelings that working in a kollel is still on the kollel learning spectrum. ๐Ÿ™‚
    So both akuperma’s and your definitions can be true at the same time.

    LU, thanks for explaining Klei kodesh! I think I’ve heard that before here, and that totally helps me see the gears and tiers of a kollel and Torah leadership in a bigger picture – falling under Klei kodesh ๐Ÿ™‚

    Bmyer, thanks! Oh yea! In-laws, I forgot! Yes so true, I’ve heard that’s common, especially for couples starting out. Excellent point ๐Ÿ™‚

    By the way, if a woman supporting someone’s Torah learning financially, is that considered like giving birth to him? (Please excuse me if I got the saying wrong, but you know what I mean, where one who teaches Torah, it’s like having a son?)

    Thanks! ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: Meet me in real life #1290903
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    Lu, I could just tell that you were thinking of Torah – You glowed! ๐Ÿ™‚

    It had to be you! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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    Geordie613, OMGOSH Geordie!!!

    Wow, I’m so sorry! I didn’t even see that come up in the news, but maybe that’s because I didn’t really search for any news but the weather thus far.

    <3 Gosh!!! Glad that the UK is doing its best!

    Sending chizzuk! <3

    in reply to: Is working at a Kollel considered “working”? #1290887
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    Oh but this “sponsorship” is definitely not “working.” If anything, maybe it’s like a scholarship to help brunt some of the costs of learning, but not in a way that it is profiting or considered working. The person would be studying anyway, so it just helps and brings chizzuk too!

    in reply to: Is working at a Kollel considered “working”? #1290881
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    Is “sponsoring” a kollel learner a common thing? I know someone who does that, and I’ve heard that helping someone learn Torah by providing financial assistance for him to keep his learning is a mitzvah too.

    Wondering if some people are sponsored or if that only happens in some cases on a longer-term basis if someone has a friend or connection somehow

    Thanks

    in reply to: Meet me in real life #1290874
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    LU, I saw R4nd0m3x interviewing someone a few days ago.

    LU, I think I may have seen you too though. Last week I saw someone walking, carrying a water bottle, was that you?

    in reply to: Living in two countries #1290783
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    I got at least two mosquito bites the day you said that… touche!

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