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November 2, 2016 11:14 am at 11:14 am in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189470LavenderMember
Thank you for all the answers. I know that all these are just speculations and we will never know the real answer, but after re-reading his last messages before breaking up and reading what you wrote here, I think he really love(d) me and only broke up because he wanted to protect me from something. So I don’t think anything bad about him.
November 1, 2016 5:17 am at 5:17 am in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189450LavenderMemberAbout his issues: I think if he was really serious and really liked me as much as he said, he should have discussed these issues with me. How does he know these are things that can’t be solved if he doesn’t even tell them to me?
But I must move one. Anyone knows a good shadchan in Israel? The current one is great, but I’m not getting too many dates, maybe if I worked with an other one in addition to the current one I would have more chance.
November 1, 2016 5:04 am at 5:04 am in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189449LavenderMemberFIF I can assure you, the story is true. Why would I spend my time making up stories on a forum???
“And now all of a sudden he doesn’t have your number!!!”
I asked for HIS RABBIS number. I wanted to talk to his rabbi, but the rabbi didn’t want him to give him the number. Is it clear now?
October 31, 2016 3:24 pm at 3:24 pm in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189424LavenderMemberI don’t think he broke up only because of his rav. Of he really wanted to continue, he would have continued no matter what his rabbi says. But if somebody wants to break up, usually there are signs before. Here there was nothing. Also I think I would have deserved a real explanation.
October 31, 2016 4:56 am at 4:56 am in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189421LavenderMemberThe fact that he has lived in many different countries doesn’t necessarily really mean he is unstable in this case. He is from a poor Eastern European country where it’s considered normal to move to find better opportunities elsewhere. Also there is no much of a Jewish life since the holocaust. On the other hand, I’m also from a country like that and for me even moving once to Israel was so stressful I don’t think I could move to a new country again, I need more stability so it can be a sign that he doesn’t or didn’t need that stability.
I also don’t believe that he would have broken up because of his rabbi if he himself wouldn’t have had concerns. When I asked about his issues he only said “I think we are very different” but whe couldn’t explain in what way we are different and why it is a problem. And it was really like one night he is planning our future life together and telling me how much he likes me, and 12 hours later he doesn’t believe we are for each other anymore.
October 30, 2016 10:42 pm at 10:42 pm in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189413LavenderMemberThank you for all the answers. They really helped. Probably I will never figure out why did he leave, but they really help me to cope with the situation.
October 30, 2016 8:19 pm at 8:19 pm in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189409LavenderMember“Maybe this guy is immature, and you would face a life of outsiders making decisions for him that would affect both you.” That’s the weirdest thing. He is 30 and already lived in 3 different countries on his own. So he didn’t sound immature or someone who can’t make decisions without his rabbi.
October 30, 2016 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189406LavenderMemberThe shadchan has no idea either. The strange is that he kept telling me how much he usually has a hard time communicating with girls but now he found me and I’m so different. He is a convert and it seems he didn’t really have relationships before either, except one, who turned out to be crazy. On our first date he was so shy I don’t think many girls would have continued dating after seeing him. So it seemed obvious that if he finally finds someone he likes and who likes him, he continues dating. So I think you are right, he must have some problem he doesn’t want to talk about.
October 30, 2016 5:40 pm at 5:40 pm in reply to: He broke up and I don't understand why? Guys, can you explain this behavior? #1189399LavenderMemberWe have been dating for 6 weeks. We met several times, not sure how many times exactly and also texted/phoned each other often. When he told me he wants to stop seeing me I asked if I can talk to his rabbi. He asked his rabbi if he can give me his number but the rabbi said no. Probably I could find him online, but I was advised against it.
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