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I thought you were going to weigh in on the great schlissel challah debate. Xtian origin or hallowed habit?
My oven is broken so I don’t bake.
I also have a bad case of dogitis.
This is a topic that is very near and dear to me: the sovreignity of the Falkland Islands. For you know, the Falkland Islands ARE British!
And being that they are nowhere near the international date line, there is no dispute as to when Shabbos commences.
Mark my words, the Falklands will rise again.
This thread is “justhavingfun”! Love it!
Dear superme – I feel your pain, I agree the rebbi should reevaluate his career choices, I think the whole situation stinks, I am sorry you were humiliated so. However, it is unrealistic to expect HIM to make a public apology to right the wrong. This person was out of control, the administration is weak, and your parents can’t do any better than they’re doing.
BUT….. here’s a reality of life: you can’t change anyone except for yourself. In order for you to grow into the wonderful, sensitive bas melech I am sure you are, YOU need to take the next step and learn the tools to grow past it. I think a competent therapist can work with you to work out the hurt and frustration, the shame and humiliation, and give you some coping strategies.
Yeah, it’s not fair that the rebbi did this to you and I’m suggesting the YOU should get help. But, as I mentioned in my earlier post, carrying a grudge will only hurt YOU. Sometimes to get on with life we have to learn to move past it, and yes, forgive. When a really big wrong has been perpetrated on us, the more we nurture the anger and hurt, the worse effect it has on us. We can grow bitter, mean, and withdraw into ourselves OR we can learn from the situation and never treat others as that person treated you, become a bringer of peace and goodwill.
It is not a fault of Judaism that this person was out of line. It is not the Torah that failed you. Don’t give up on G-d because people are weak. Daven. Ask G-d to help you through your pain. Ask Him to help this rebbi, the principal, and everyone you’d like to see suffering as you have. Ask Him to show you how to get past your pain.
Since the others won’t change YOU are going to have to learn to be strong. That’s why I suggest a cognitive therapist for a few, maybe 8, sessions with the goal of letting go hurts and getting past them. You can do it. You are sensitive, a thinking person, and young enough to be flexible. Take this ugly experience, take this garbage, and turn it into an opportunity to flourish. If you try to see it the way I suggest, you will be able to handle the many hurts and insults that occur in life.
It would be kind of hard for him to be shaven if he has a beard! Oooh oh oh. Sometimes I’m so funny I crack myself up!
I made barley soup. Think the birds would like the leftovers?
I want to win it anyhow.
I don’t get it….
Bloody Mary if you don’t like OJ?
cool question
never thought of it
@superme- I’m speechless. As a parent of boys, I can remember many times when one would come home saying he’d been “kicked out” of class and I was like “what did you do to deserve it”? Usually with boys, there’s some kind of commotion. And frequently, after my son told me what happened, I could understand why he got kicked out. But it was rare. Unless you were being super-chutzpadik, I can’t fathom this happening.
SaysMe gave good advice about asking mechila. But since it sounds like you did that already and had a worse experience of being humiliated, it’s time to kick it up a level. Talk to your parents at a calm and private time. Think of all of the things you were doing at the time and what the general mood of the class was. Be 100% honest. Since you already apologized to the rebbi I know you have it in you. Ask your parents for advice and support. See what they have to say and how they can support you. Perhaps you can come up with some kind of plan to all meet with the rebbi and have a “behavior plan” ready for him. Be proactive. But also be respectful and humble. If my daughter came home with this tale, I’d support her all the way, but I’d also want to uncover the truth. Every story has two sides. It may be that you caught it when the rebbi was at the lowest of lows and couldn’t take one more thing. They are human.
I’ve been in your place, accused of something horrible and very upsetting, with no seeming way to redeem myself. I urge you to daven to NOT carry a grudge. Daven for his welfare, that he should have the zechus of good classes, wonderful nachas from all his children. If you develop a grudge, you’ll only hurt yourself. Remember, HaShem gives us what we need. I’m not trying to blow you off or be “frum,” rather I wish you growth, Toradige growth, through this difficult period.
Shema in bed. I’m an insomniac so I read, listen to the radio or play with my iPhone (new: still an amazingly interesting toy) while waiting to fall asleep while DH slumbers peacefully, lights on, sound on, sirens wailing — oh that’s outside.
OOM= I’m so glad that neither you nor I have spaces and have to enter those ugly little dashes! JHF
@purplicious – what did you say? i can’t fig it out.
Why do you want to invite entire staff? Are you close with all? Is it a small place? Do you socialize with them? Are there frum coworkers you are inviting and fear how it will look if you exclude the non-Jews?
About the blacks: Do you realize that you are trivializing your chosson’s feelings even before you are married? The issue shouldn’t be whether or not you work with non-Jews, but how you relate to each other! You both need some counseling or you’ll be wondering soon enough who to invite to your next wedding… plus looking for someone to babysit your kids. Tsk tsk tsk.
The label on the jar of Meal Mart gefilte fish says it’s “glatt.” Now them’s some nice smooth fish lungs.
My Farberware 1-1/2 qt. and 3 qt. saucepans have their own lids, but the 10″ skillet shares its lid with the 6 qt. Dutch oven. Is that against halacha?
people should dress age appropriate
When my Bubba was my age, she wore “granny” shoes and an apron all day long.
I’d rather be immature and wear my sweatshirt! (And so would my Mom!!)
Don’t listen to “Health”; stress can cause myriad troubles ranging from inflammation to sapping you of energy.
In addition to the other good advice about diets and medication, for the long term, it would help if you learn some relaxation techniques to deal with managing your overall stress level. There are simple routines you can learn from listening to tapes, CDs, apps or downloads that teach relaxation. You can see a therapist about various treatments, too.
There is something called NeuroLinguisticProgramming (NLP). This is something you can do for yourself, even if people won’t leave you alone or you’re in a situation where you can not leave the presence of the stressors. I suggest you try it.
Please get it checked out by seeing a doctor! (Don’t rely upon the coffee room for medical opinions; I’m not a doctor but I play one on the Internet.)
GERD is not limited to acid reflux/heartburn. You should get a medical checkup. There are changes in the nerves that can occur which can resemble the symptoms you describe without feeling the classic heartburn. Other illnesses, like diabetes, can also cause changes that make you feel nauseous and/or like you have a lump in your throat. If you are experiencing anxiety or stress, that can be a trigger, too. There are medications that can prevent this from becoming full-fledged GERD. Hatzlachah.
Hey Kids! Lighten up! Usually I am “Just Having Fun,” but now I am way serious. Why all the infighting amongst Jews? We have enough goyim who hate us so let’s not add any ayin haras.
If the TSA asked the Rebbe to remove his bekeshe, what’s the harm? In December 2011 they took an 84-old lady in a wheel chair out for examination, did a strip search on her, and made her miss her connecting flights. (http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2011/12/strip-searched-grandma-says-tsa-removed-her-underwear/) In their zeal to not appear to be profiling passengers (unlike ElAl), they examine all sorts of people who are unlikely to be troublemakers. Why should the Rebbe be any different? It’s not like he’s Obama’s right hand man or anything.
We have to stop bashing other Jews! Period! How is Moshiach going to come if we can’t make peace amongst ourselves!
Sheesh. Sometimes you guys really annoy me.
@DaasYochid
Nuh uh. Most current post for jphone is 2 years ago.
popa_bar_abba =January 2, 2008 (5 years)
WolfishMusings =January 24, 2008 (4 years)
147 =April 4, 2008 (4 years)
I used to be here under a different name, too, but then it froze and I had to take a different name.
I read the title of this post… and thought you were talking about CHEVRON the oil company!!!
Just calling it a “crisis” is a crisis. Look, sensationalism sells. Nowadays we don’t welcome an inch of snow in December just because it’s winter. Nope – all of a sudden, the NYC metro area is battening down for a “severe storm.” TV & radio weather reporting comes from “Storm Team 11” or “the Severe Weather Center.” Chill out, people. It’s an inch of snow. In December.
Likewise, the shidduch crisis has come about because our values have been warped by the outside world. It isn’t good enough to be good enough. Everyone wants a “mitsuyan.” Everyone wants the “top boy” or “top girl.” Everyone wants the nitpickyiest qualifications.
A Rav I know who does couples counseling published a pamphlet urging people to “Just Settle.” What are you holding out for? Everyone is human. Live with it. A good enough person is good enough. Especially when you are in your 20s, never married. You’re growing together. The most important quality is to be able to grow together and work together to build a marriage.
The “crisis” has arisen because our expectations have arisen. Not pretty enough, too nebbish, wrong color socks with his Shabbos shoes, wears sandals, from the wrong seminary, too Chassidish, too Litvish, can’t drive, can drive…. Who in the old days would have been disqualified as a shidduch for their mother using the “wrong” color tablecloth?
We know an unmarried man who 15 years ago (when he was 40) turned down a late 30’s woman because she would only have been able to have 1 or 2 kids. Now, never married, in his 50s, he has zero kids. What did he gain by waiting for a “better” prospect?
The “Crisis” is that we don’t educate our sons and daughters in what marriage is. We need to tell them how to pick a spouse based on chessed, middos, liveable qualities, the zerizus they exhibit and for what, how to please their spouse, assessing how a persons is going to be for the long run. We’ve focused on short-run qualities forgetting that we are married not just through the dancing and celebrations, but also through lo aleinu illness, hardship, and times of trouble. How equipped are our sons and daughters to deal with that? Can they choose a spouse who has the qualities for “everyday use” and not just “for special”?
To sleep, perchance to dream. Inventions to take you to REM-land and stamp that tourist visa.
1. The soother: tranquilize a crying baby back to sleep.
2. The imposter: converts the mommy’s interrupted sleep time to quality sleep time so she doesn’t feel like the sleep-deprived monster she has become.
3. The player: gives students adequate sleep-equivalent time whilst allowing them to stay up to all hours gaming — er, studying.
4. The power napper: allows working people to turn 5 minutes with their head down on the desk after lunch into a refreshing and invigorating break.
5. The trainer: converts sleep interrupted by frequent breaks spent going to the littlest room into an uninterrupted vista. Allows users to drink more than just a sip after dinner, too.
6. The plug: converts the sound of your spouse’s snoring to your choice of the sound of Caribbean waves upon the beach, chanting of Eicha, cats purring, Rush Limbaugh, gentle rainfall, or professor of water sanitation on the history of flocculation.
7. The 24/6: Slumber the week away and wake refreshed for your holy Shabbos rest.
As soon as you let these females start a-schoolin’, they got them some crayzee idears in their purty lil heads that they didn’t need a man! Whaddya know!
Then on the other side, you get these 26-year old models marrying 82-year old men waiting for them to kick off so they can raise their sweet little new babies with all the cash the old guy left to them. Sheesh! No chance for a younger guy.
We’re going to wake up one day and find that we’ve all been characters in someone’s dream anyways.
Better a kumzitz than a zitz bath!
I only sing in the shower. And when nobody else is home. And when nobody at home is in the shower.
Alternatively, I only sing rap because nobody can call that st*ff music and no voice, however beautiful, can make it sound … like music.
I’m cozy inside and the super has the heat cranked up! Got nowhere to go……. Let it Snow!
tra la la …”I’m dreaming of a White New Year’s….” la de da da di dum di dum (Irving Berlin)
Amazing how Jews wrote all of those sappy “holiday” songs that we won’t need to hear again for at least another 300 days.
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow! (lyricist Sammy Cahn and composer Jule Styne)
I was at a shul that davened nusach sfard and I only know ashkenaz/couldn’t find the “regular” artscrol (the extra words in sfard confuse me). So I used my iPhone app.
Whoopee! Double bonus!!! Kept seeing what my “Words with Friends” opponents were playing popping up at top… and their words weren’t as strong as mine. Now that’s real davening!
I’m staying home and ripping toilet paper all night!
Today’s Daf Yomi {Shabbos 83} discussed various issues relating to utilizing stones to wipe oneself in bathroom. Can I fulfill my obligation to tear toilet on this nite by attending today’s Daf Yomi?
Me? What am I doing on Nittel Nacht? Just like me ole granny and hers before her: I’m staying home and ripping toilet paper all night!
Nancy Brodrick, the talking cat, said, “No talking cats in this story due to a malfunction of the bein hazmanim machine.”
Wait – a car? back in time?
What about the radio announcer?
Or should it have been WCBS with all the “oldies”?
11) Everyone got “turkey drunk” from too much tryptophan the day after T-day Shabbos turkey extravaganza and they are still recovering.
12) Too much clutter in the inbox.
13) Lazy lazy lazy <yawn>
14) Waiting for the new Lipa release
15) They don’t serve chocolate in the CR
16) Sprained a hamstring playing football and am on the injured list
17) Bittul Torah!!!
18) Too busy writing on “imamother” forums
19) Dear Hubby just came home and I have to feed him
20) No new dazzling chiddushim or pure silliness to contribute to the mix.
Ketchup, applesauce, those are the usual pareve choices. But you didn’t say if we’re having to stay pareve, so this is a real brain teaser!
🙂
I sure hope the frozen ones go on sale soon!
Please leave out the walnuts for those of us who are allergic. Otherwise, when’s lunch?
For some reason, everything that is NOT BLACK is forbidden in the yeshivish world. If you want to ever get a shidduch, give a red light to the green frames and go black. This will remain a blot on your shidduchim resume forever and prospects will dry up for your future children, too.
I think the designers of 5″ stiletto heel boots (for snow?) should be subjected to reading this page and memorizing it. Oh, the pain of it all!
If you are 47 and never married but want to be married and everything else about him is ok, YES, you’re being picky.
If you are in your young 20s, you can still have some “selectiveness,” but you must then feel guilty that you are contributing to the shidduch crisis.
Heshy started to glow in pleasure. “Dis vaudeville we’s gonna be doin’ is straight from the rebbe’s tish. I mean just like a mitzvah tantz, widout the streimels or strings.”
Nancy said, “I rather prefer playing with the string, but if you must, you must.”
“But what do we do for an encore?” Dov-Winnie-the-Pooh-Ber scratched his beard. “All we have is what we came back in time with. I don’t have so much as a ball to juggle or a flame to swallow!”
Nancy yawned. “I’ll sing, of course. It’s not assur for a female cat to show her vocal talents.” She started caterwauling and the group covered their ears in pain.
All of a sudden, Mod-93.9 cut in with a station break. “WNYC. Never. Turn. It. Off.”
Will “Tea” be the new replacement for “Coffee”?
When a yeshiva bochur stands on the night of his wedding under the heiglige chuppa with the shchina by his side and signs a document …
- He
signs nothing! The eidim sign!! (So if he doesn’t support her, do the eidim come and break his kneecaps?)
I am sorry that you find it strange.
Thank you for your sympathy, “interjection.” as a professional editor and all around perfect person, I know what all styles should be. And I know what Wolfish Musings should have called his wife in private instead of her first name. But – moving on – she is not Dr. Chaim Cohen. Sheesh. You’d think a yid would give a poor muddle-headed female some credit for going to med school. All them difficult words to scribble on teeny pieces of paper. And sick people! Yuck! I’d rather stick with contaminated keyboards and missssplleded werdz.
Now for something completely different:
My first name is really ??????!
The only way we can prevent the red ants from breeding is to…
…give them some family-appropriate entertainment! Let’s put on a show!!! It worked for Mickey Rooney… and he had 9 lives (or was that 9 wives?) so it should work for us.”
Now, the travelers were skeptical about the idea of a show and started to grumble. “What if they don’t like vaudeville?” Dov Winnie-the-Pooh Ber complained.
“If I do my soft shoe shuffle, I may crush them” siad Heshy “Hot Foot” Hoppleheimer.
Works best if hair is darkish. If you’re fair-skinned, light haired, won’t work completely. May need repeated treatments to get results you want. Also is can be more painful than “like a strong rubber band” as they say depending upon area treated.