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Part of learning to drive is learning that a person is always responsible for damages he or she causes. This is why Baba Kama was one of the most important Gemoras to teach our sons. With girls and women driving this message about the responsibility for damages has to also be taught to our daughters.
D9, the Torah teaches us to be very careful in monetary matters and to plan ahead to avoid situations where one will be pressured to be dishonest in monetary matters.
“a heavy obligation”
Actually it works in favor of those who actually go into teaching and leadership roles.
Gadol HaMetzuvah VeOseh m’me she-aino Metzuvah Ve-Oseh
Fulfilling actual obligations earns greater heavenly reward than doing positive deeds that one is not obligated to do.
Learning Torah al minat she-lo laasot is not learning.
This is learning for the purpose of avoiding one’s normal obligations.
This is learning for the purpose of avoiding interactions with other Jews who actually have to work.
One who has the privilege of being supported by a rich father in law for several years has a heavy obligation to give something back to Clal Yisroel, just as we take for granted that the rich can not ignore the material needs of the poor.
Every boy needs to have plan to make a positive contribution regardless of what his goals are. If he sees himself as the modern equivalent of the tribe of Levi and sees that he has a future as a teacher of Torah, he needs to start planning for that role. He has to see that he has the talents needed to become an effective teacher, and then be willing to develop those talents. He has to get honest feedback about his potential as a teacher. If the feedback is that teaching is not for him, then he has to find another area to make a contribution.
Sitting in learning as long as possible and expecting to be supported by a rich father in law is not a plan.
In general you will get a more “right wing” answer from the YWN Coffeeroom and a more “moderate” answer from your LOR.
At least that has been my own personal experience.
“community standards” are generally based upon some logic.
What is the logic of banning denim, a practical cost effective material?
I realize that denim is not exactly the material of royalty, but financially most of us are not there.
“no denim”
What is the problem with denim material?
Women have a natural tendency to want to look unique.
Such a tendency should be guided in a direction away from real Pritzus and in a direction that does break the bank.
Hats achieve both goals, as the most expensive hat (unless it has precious stones embedded in it) costs a fraction of a good Sheitel.
However, pascha bchochma hit the nail on the head – they make women look too much like the Modern Orthodox!!!
“Loud” clothing and accessories draw attention away from the body.
That can be useful at times when you want to draw attention away from a facial pimple or some discolored teeth.
Geirim (converts) are effectively casting their lot and fate with that of the Jewish people. When a convert comes out of the Mikvah he or she is “born” into the Jewish Nation.
When the next Passover comes the convert brings the Passover offering!!!
We keep the Torah because of two of the shared national experiences; Yetziat Mitzraim (the Exodos) and Matan Torah (the Revelation to all of us).
Unlike other religions we are much more based upon shared national experiences than on a philosophy.
The Rambam’s formulation of the 13 Principles was in response to those who think in philosophical terms.
More basic for us are the 6 experiences we should remember each day.
We are also obligated to see G-d’s role in our lives and in keeping the Jewish People alive as a nation, and feel ourselves as part of the Jewish Nation and its history. We mourn the tragedies that have occurred to our Nation and we celebrate positive events that have occurred.
Why do we seem to know more what exactly constitutes Apikorsos than earlier generations knew?
Areas of Hashkafah that were in dispute in the time of the Rishonim (Rambam era) have been decided by some with certainty.
As I understand,even full prophecy can not resolve a Halachic uncertainty.
Whatever Ruach Hakodesh is, it can never be put on the same level as Nevuah (prophecy).
In some circles the Black Hat competes with the Tefilin as the icon of the Bar Mitzvah. Moving the starting of the wearing of the Black Hat to either several years before or several years after the Bar Mitzvah would insure that Tefilin remain the focus of the Bar Mitzvah.
popa_bar_abba, we are not going to allow this Gemara to be used for widespread use by men to get out of their family obligations.
For one consideration, he would have to prove that his level of dedication and learning was on the level of R’Adda bar Ahava.
The Torah obligates him to support the family.
The Ketubah obligates him.
Did she make a Mechilah (forgiveness) of this obligation with such a powerful Kinyan that she can not later insist on her rights?
Shortly after Rav Aaron Kotler was niftar
I held out for quite a number of years, but cellphones are a Fait Accompli. Live in the world we are in, not the world we wish we had.
I believe a strong campaign against Toeva and Toeva lifestyles is in order. If you live a Toevah lifestyle it is almost inevitable that actual Toeva will occur. If you live beyond your means somewhere down the line you will be forced into stealing.
A strong anti – Toevah campaign will restore our reputation for the highest integrity in financial matters.
With this restoration, presently non observant Jews will be impressed and will want to become Shabbos observant.
“It is better that the One who gave life should take it away, and let man not injure himself.”
My best understanding is that when there is a requirement for martyrdom it is only for allowing oneself to be killed, not a requirement that one kills himself.
“my question is why didn’t Reb Chanina ask him to save him?”
With the other Roman solders around saving him would have been totally impossible. This is by any one solder, even one willing to sacrifice his own life.
What defines a “Ben Torah”?
To me such a title implies more than just being a Talmid Chacham, it also requires that his learning drive how he lives.
Perhaps one should have to demonstrate solid learning accomplishment and keeping of Mitzvos for a long period of time before taking such a title.
Giving this title to Bar Mitzvah boys cheapens the title.
Some La-chashes work better than others:
The old standby is “Makpid Gamur” to be put on items left in a cafeteria to prevent them from mysteriously disappearing.
“Chalav Akum” works better.
I recall a disputing opinion (a Tosfos) which says she was 13 years old.
“60% frum college kids sleeping around”
If there were more Touro and YU type options, these kids could have had options with less temptations.
“as Yidden are supposed to have a uniform”
Please cite sources for this requirement.
A uniform requirement is far more than just dressing in a manner that those who see you will know that you are Jewish.
A uniform is very much associated with the military where a rigid structure is needed to be able to conduct war. In an army there is no room for individual creativity.
Even in wartime, not all functions need the uniform. Those building the weapons do not.
The pre-WW2 litvishe yeshivos did not have a uniform. Lakewood when Rav Aaron Kotler was alive did not have the white shirt and black hat uniform.
But now, every boy turning Bar Mitzvah is presumed to be “military academy” material and must wear the full uniform.
Are you talking about chumros for individuals to keep, or about stricter standards to be imposed upon the community?
The down side of chumros is that they can drive many away from keeping Torah and Mitzvos.
Further chumros can create divisions within the larger Jewish community.
The entire tractate of Demai is about the tension between maintaining standards and maintaining the unity of the Jewish people.
Sometimes chumros can take priority over true biblical concerns. I have heard of those who will resort to gezel (theft) to enforce new stringencies in Tznius.
“cannot bring himself to hug his child after potching him”
The child may decide the hug is worth the cost of a potch.
What is the difference between Ir HaKodesh and Ir HaTorah?
(Besides the 7 time zones)
I just Googled “TorahTrueJews” and brought up a bunch of web sites that made my blood boil.
Pashuteh Yid,
This is a subject of great debate, but my own take on the subject is that they were are formula for survival thru most of the long Galus. We would be good citizens and the nations would not oppress us excessively. There was no formal oath as there was only the formal acceptance of the Torah at Sinai. In eastern Europe since the 1800’s the oppression became excessive. All 4 of my grandparents fled Europe which had become a burning house as far as Jews were concerned and came to US & Canada.
There are those who argue that the Shalosh Shevuos are binding upon us even when the nations violate them. If so, they become effectively a suicide pact for us, not a tool of survival.
We are now at year 5770 – 2010 CE and the Jewish State is a Fait Accompli.
The American Jewish community is also an important part of our survival and we are obligated to be good citizens.
“no reason why someone should want mixed seating if not for taiva/aveira”
Perhaps someone wants to sit with his wife and / or children?
From the second Igros Moshe at the top of this thread:
“If I had the ability, in our country I would do away with the bar mitzvah celebration for boys, for it is well known that this celebration never brought any person closer to Torah and mitzvah, not even the bar mitzvah boy, and not even for a brief moment.”
Reb Moshe was trying to end both Bar and Bat Mitzvas, he was not trying to “write” the Kallah out of the wedding like some right wingers in this coffee room are.
“immigration to anyone with a tenuous connection to Judaism”
They are very machmir (stringent) in the Mitzvah of rescuing Jews and properly so. I agree that long term problems could arise, but we are obligated to look at the Mitzvah at hand of rescuing in the case of doubt and not be so worried about the long term in this case.
According to some there is only one life cycle event that a woman is allowed to be the center of attention:
The Levayah (funeral)
“we as b’nei Torah should not wear shorts in public”
There is a higher standard of dress for those who are Torah Scholars. This is mentioned in the Talmud.
Situations change from generation to generation and the leaders of that generation need to be consulted.
The first two letter from Rav Moshe in this thread were from a time where he saw Bar Mitzvahs as practiced here in the US as being completely barren of anything uplifting for the boy.
Fortunately this is not always the case now.
Bear, you can not see any good in the Jewish State which for all its faults is the collective will of many Jews. Even when Jews are disconnected from G-d they maintain a connection to the Jewish people. In general, the Jewish State shows a concern for Jewish lives that no other State has. The first law passed was to guarantee open immigration to all Jews.
“And anyone who touches the political system there past the municipal level is rolling around in the mud of Sodom.”
Wow, bear, you have just condemned the vast majority of the Charedei world and their Torah leadership.
Bear, we are talking of hundreds of thousands of Jews who immigrated from 1920 thru 1945. According to official British records 367,845 Jews immigrated during that period legally and probably another 50-60,000 illegally (according to British law).
If they had not immigrated, most of them would have been dead (R’L) by 1945. If immigration had been kept fully open during this time then hundreds of thousands more Jews could have been saved.
There is a huge qualitative difference doing a Mitzvah that you are actually obligated to do vs. doing the same Mitzvah when you are really exempt. Ask any true convert.
In response to Philosopher above:
“From dressing like adults in suit and hat, to putting on teffilin, making sure to daven with a minyan, expecting them to act with more maturity…”
Acting with more maturity is equally on boys and girls.
Tefilin and Minyan are my categoy b) above.
Dressing like adults in suit and tie has to be a new category d).
We have entire communities where weekday wearing of suit / tie is reserved for real Klei Kodesh.
Bear, if you keep on bringing up all the evils the Zionists did; I will remind you that there were some of the Old Yishuv who tried to encourage Britain to restrict Jews from entering the land.
In 1924 to speak any Loshon Hara to the British about the newcomers (even if true) was Mamash Shifichas Damim.
One can not just assert that something is “chukas hagoyim”.
One has to show that it is associated with idolatry or immorality; or show that that it is an irrational practice and that idolatry or immorality has to be suspected.
In warm climates shorts are practical, and for men there is no improper uncovering.
Health, sorry I can not help about the Maan.
Those who are actually Zoche to it are quiet about it.
BMG actually uses heating and air conditioning, so that contributors can have a share in the learning.
Some boys and men have a little label on the trousers for the shul Gabbai to see so he can give them the second Aliyah.
This way the Gabbai does not have to shout out repeatedly, “Are the any Levi-im here?”
Now waht is the reason for the Bar Mitzvah in the first place?
a) For the family to show off its wealth, social standing and frumkeit? From some of Rav Moshe’s writings brought down in this this thread it appears that here in the USA that has become a reality in too many cases.
Lets try to be more positive:
b) To inaugurate the boy into active participation in Tefilah B’Tzibur. He can now read the Torah, lead services and count towards the quorum of 10 needed. This is like a regular Kohain on his first day of Avodah in the Beit HaMikdash.
With b) Bar but not Bat Mitzvahs would be advisable.
However the term Bar Mitzvah implies what Philosopher above stated: “starts having a chiuv to perform the mitzvos”. Which becomes c).
My initial post was based on either a) or b) being the case.
However, the term Bar Mitzvah implies much more than one group of Mitzvos no matter how important they are.
Based upon c) Bat or Bas Mitzvas should also be done.
Those in Lakewood who are up to the lofty standards of Lakewood Shel Maalah are enveloped by the Annanei HaKavod and supplied Maan.
By asking about heating oil or even shopping in their stores you show that you are not part of the Lakewood Shel Maalah.
This why some object to sit down restaurants in Lakewood. They do not want to advertise that there people who are not Ochlei Ha-maan in the city.
Hence, heating oil needs to be delivered be-Tzinah (quietly privately).