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“waving their fat fingers” is a derogatory way of speaking/writing (derogatory both to the people you intend to denigrate, and to people who actually happen to have fat fingers, no matter what they do).
If you mean to say that you have an issue with people who are pretending to be in full time learning but are not learning seriously, then say that. That is NOT what you said.
Avi K:
You said, “Full-time life-long learning should be only for a small elite.”
*should*?
That is your opinion.
Do you also accept the idea that other people could have a different opinion?
WinnieThePooh – small family. We only use about 5 trays of eggs. I bought these stackable plastic egg trays so I wash all my eggs and put them in these trays (they hold the eggs just like the carton ones but they are not ruined by the wet eggs and they let the eggs dry (they are also clean). I lower my egg shelf in the fridge and put the pile on it. I use a bunch of the eggs right away, boiling them, baking, etc. before Pesach, so probably one tray doesn’t have to go there.
If we were a larger family I don’t know what I would do with all the pre-washed eggs…..
About eggs being kept out of the refrigerator:
In Israel, the trays of eggs are generally not refrigerated. At home I refrigerate them if I have room. Pesach I do refrigerate them.
Why?
In the US the eggs we would buy in the store have been rinsed. Rinsing removes a natural coating on the eggs. Eggs without the natural coating need to be refrigerated.
This is usually the answer given to Americans who come to Israel and complain about how the eggs are dirty and it is unsanitary and we should push to require that they be washed. Apparently, in this case, the dirty eggs are *more* sanitary 🙂
Lenny,
I don’t know if there is any abuse going on or not, as I am not there.
Your wife feels that there is. You feel that there is not.
Since your wife feels that there is, the only therapist who can be relied on to handle the situation properly is one who understands and has experience with abuse. Whether or not *you* believe there is.
An additional point — in most (all? I don’t know) cases of abuse, the abuser truly does not believe that there is any abuse going on.
That does not mean that in your case there is. But it does mean that in your case there might be, without your being aware of it or seeing it for what it is.
You need a counselor who can help both of you deal with the fact that your wife feels that there is an abusive situation here.
For therapy to work, you both have to be open to changing. I don’t know your motivations, but *if* you are going into therapy to force your wife to change while you stay the same, perhaps you are using therapy as abuse (control).
Lenny,
When there is any suspicion that there might be abuse involved, it is crucial to get a therapist who knows how to deal with an abusive situation. Whether or not you agree that abuse is involved.
It is absolutely crucial. A therapist who does not have knowledge and experience in this area can make the situation worse.
JM
> (“real” Ashkenzim & Sephardim do begin from bar mitzvah, though,
> I think without covering the head).
If by “real Ashkenazim” you mean those keeping “???? ????? ??????” (otherwise known as “yekkes”), the boys start wearing a tallis as children (I guess when they start to go to shul; five or six years old).
> From what I’ve seen, young yekkes wear a TG with a hat, so that
> they don’t wear the TG over their heads.
Right. When they are old enough to wear a hat. Before that they wear the tallis without the hat, but without putting it over the head.
zehavasdad:
I have not lived in NY in a long time. Maybe the situation has changed. But I lived in the city and in the suburbs as a child. There were many places near us where one just did not go because it was not safe. Even in our “safe” suburb, a child could not safely go out alone at night. There was a certain level of caution (and sometimes a level of fear) about kidnapping, crime, etc. In NYC we had several locks on the doors. I was so well trained in door locking that it took me many many years in EY to become comfortable with the idea that an apartment’s front door could be left unlocked when people were home and awake. We just didn’t do things like that.
Here, kids go to the store alone at three or four years old to buy milk. They can go out after dark. I have many neighbors who leave their door unlocked (or open) whether they are home or not. (We lock ours when not home or when everyone is sleeping.) My children have much more freedom here than I had growing up in NY.
We didn’t talk to strangers. My kids asked strangers to “cross them the street” (safely take them across the street when they were too young to cross themselves).
Yes, there are terrorist attacks. I think more people are killed in car accidents. There is far less crime, and far more caring between strangers. There is also a closeness to Hashem, a special level of shmira. We feel (and are) safer. Not perfectly safe, but safer. More secure. More free.
Right on!
Shapiro’s wine
My kids aren’t old enough to vote, but I have a friend with many voting age children. She is registered in Florida. She tried to help her kids get registered to vote but was not able to. It apparently could not be done in Florida. It may vary by state.
If someone knows more about this — a way that her kids could register to vote — please post about it and I’ll hopefully see it and pass it on!
I went through something similar many years ago. I was in an environment with a lot of cursing and grew used to it and used the words myself.
Leaving that environment really helped, but it took a while. The words were sort of “part of me” but just as they had become part of me they eventually stopped being part of me.
I think I did also consciously try to stop using them, and practiced some alternate means of expressing myself. It was weird at first; I felt like my expression was sort of restricted. That went away eventually though.
Hatzlocha raba!