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There are a lot of people who stay in abusive marriages. This is not only women. There are men also who ate abused by their wives. Maybe there should be more divorces. Maybe there is too much of stigma against it.
Some times both are to blame some times more one then the other and sometimes one person is great and the other is to blame. You can’t make blanket statements about blame. Each case is different and should be treated as such. We all have biases towards certain things whether that is to favor the man or woman or being sensitive to certain types of abuse. You need someone who is very good at this and I’d venture to guess that most therapists and Rabbis aren’t experts in this area. There are lots of people with good intentions but who don’t know what they are doing.
Enough Divorces “DY, actually I’m saying that there is no right and wrong, but rather that in every conflict both sides contribute (regardless of percent ratios), so both sides are both right and wrong.”
There is no right and wrong?! That is what the secular liberals may tell you but its 100% false. This attitude is a huge part of the problem. Therapists and others come in with the assumptions that everyone is a little wrong and just be nice and it will all be okay. This is often not the case. Many times there is one person abusing the other and the victim is not to be blamed for this. Is the victim perfect? Maybe not but you can’t blame them for being mistreated.
“TheGoq, Enough Divorces is saying (and I’ve seen this happen as well) that the therapist might very well be empowering the wrong spouse.”
+2
I think daas yochid hit the nail on the head. If you can stay in the marriage and remain a good husband and good father and continue to grow spiritually then it may be a good idea to stay together. If on the other hand staying married means the kids growing up in a disfuctional family that could be worse than divorce. You can speak to people and get advice but that will only get you so far. Rabbaim will give their advice but no one knows the situation like you do and no one knows your abilities like you do. Finally no one cares about your kids like you do. So you have to keep the best interest of the kids in mind. Also be really honest with yourself and your own abilities. This could be very hard to do. Also keep in mind if you are being abused you shouldn’t live like that and that may be another reason to leave. But don’t kid your self divorce is hard and messy and if you have kids you’ll probably always have to deal with your wife. Also get your finances in order.
Bah bah black 🐑 have you any wool…
There are two questions here. 1. Is it right to mislead people about Judaism to do kiruv? The answer I think would be no. But those doing kiruv probably think they are pitching the whole true story of what being frum is about. 2. If you know someone isn’t going to listen you shouldn’t tell them. At the same time 80-90% of Jews in America aren’t frum. So you can’t just abandon all those people. There are kids going to college who never saw teffilin! Sticking your head in the sand isn’t a solution. I can’t just not learn halacha and claim i didn’t keep it bc I didn’t know it.
This is the Apple/iPhone style. Minimalist, sleek design. Not cluttered. No extra buttons or ports. This is the style of the times.
I think it’s the loud hair which is causing the wedding crises which leads to measured shidduchim resulting OTD.
Adocs
What I mean is that when they announce the molad in shul they assume that the moon moves at a constant speed. However it doesn’t. But we do it this way for convenience and simplicity.
When they announce the mold in shul they also round the chalakim. Maybe it’s just for simplicity.
Does anyone have more information about what happened here. Are these the same people protesting as last time? Is it a Jewish owner? I’d her part of a specific chassidish? Are members of that same chassidish protesting? Are these protesters acting on their own or being told to by a rebbe? Why this specific store (I’m sure it’s not the only place you could by a smartphone in Monsey?
If the Chofetz Chaim said someone born to parents who didn’t keep taharas hamishpacha will be wicked, that statement doesn’t preclude one from doing teshuvah and then later become something other than wicked.