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For the last time, I do not TAKE OFFENSE, I just think it is WEIRD.
I made a distinction on the previous page between guests that the person knows and guests that they don’t know. If you are in fact inviting a “friend of a friend” that you have never met or barely know, it’s perfectly reasonable to lock your bedroom door. But if you are inviting someone you know well, you should be able to trust them to stay out of your personal space and/or control your children.
Sugar? Splenda? Stevia?
Hi, this is jewishfeminist02’s husband. Before weighing in on this, I must mention that my Rebbe (Rav Yitzchak Blau, son of Rav Yosef Blau – mashgiach ruchani of YU) has an extensive shiur called “Does the Talmud Have a Sense of Humor?” A recording and mekoros can be found on YU Torah.
Now, here’s a few of my own:
1) Menachos 99b: Ben Dama thinks he knows all of Torah, and wants to learn Greek philosophy. His brother, R’ Yishmael (already known for advocating work in addition to Torah – see Berachos 35b) tells him “v’higisa bo yomam v’laila.” One of the meforshim says that this means you can learn Greek philosophy during bein hashemashos.
2) Berachos 63a: One must teach his son an easy and clean profession. What is that? “Needlework” ???? ????????. In the context of a machlokes about whether one should engage in a profession or learn full time, suggesting a profession whose shorashim resemble “???” and “?????” is probably a pun.
3) Chagigah 14b: There are lots of serious terutzim and halachos following this one, but it starts off with a pretty funny hava aminah:
They asked Ben Zoma: Can you castrate a dog?
Ben Zoma: In chu”l (the pasuk says only “b’artzechem”)
edited. Nice, thanks!
If the door had been unlocked the OP would not have gone in, he would have cracked the door open for a second, quickly seen it was the wrong one, closed it and moved on probably without seeing anything untoward.
How can you “mostly” trust a person? What does that even mean? Do you really want someone as a guest in your home if they will violate your privacy against your explicit instructions?
No ship-jumping here.
For the host: If you don’t trust them, don’t invite them. It’s that simple.
For the guest: It is bizarre. Acknowledge to yourself that it is bizarre and say nothing to your host.
How is that not geneivas da’as? More to the point, if you do in fact owe back taxes, how is that not geneiva?
oomis, I wish all hosts were like you! I have been in a situation before where I was given the key to an apartment with no instructions, no note, no anything and had to figure it out for myself. I don’t think I tried literally every single door but it was definitely unclear where I was going.
I just think that for the two seconds that the guest will see the bedroom before realizing it is the wrong one, anything that conspicuous would be easy to clean up ahead of time. Or they can spend that time writing a note with directions instead of cleaning up. Either way, if you don’t trust them not to go into your bedroom, you shouldn’t trust them to stay in your guest room.
I already said it wasn’t offensive. They should clean it anyway.
Many foreign countries do indeed use less processing than America, whether because they are less developed or because they have different laws governing the production of food.
India is one example. I have also heard that it is okay to eat “street food” in places like France and the Netherlands when the machine is only used to make a certain thing, e.g. French fries (potatoes and extra virgin olive oil are always kosher and fries would never be served at a state dinner).
This, presumably, was not a surprise visit though. The hosts had time to put away any articles of clothing or trash that were in plain sight (it really only takes a minute).
It’s not offensive, just weird.
Yeah, could be, but everyone’s house gets messy at some point and I really don’t understand why they would be so HUGELY embarrassed as to take the step of locking the door.
chofetzchaim, did you go home or are you still in NV? come for shabbos!! lol
Anyone with any sense at all will say thank you to his host and leave politely (or, if he leaves before they return, write a thank you note and put it in a conspicuous place) and not confront him with “Why did you lock your bedroom door?”
I am handling the heat by staying out of it and cranking up the A/C!
Bump! *shudder*
No, it is because food is significantly more processed now than it was 50 years ago.
haifagirl, how would one shutter “about” a window? (Sorry, I couldn’t resist).
The law is that the stores must close for shabbos. The Supreme Court ruled that stricter enforcement is needed, commenting that they were not making a statement of religion but merely enforcing the law.
We had to stay home from shul yesterday because of the heat. We did go on Friday night and nearly fainted from heat exhaustion on our way home (no, I am not exaggerating). This is the worst heat wave Vegas has had in 8 years. Iy”h they are saying it should break by tomorrow.
Incidentally, the shuls here start at 7:30 A.M. in summertime so everyone can get out early before the worst heat of the day settles.
Obviously the guest is not going to indicate his discomfort to the host…
When you invite a guest to stay in your apartment, presumably you don’t EXPECT them to invade your privacy, or else you wouldn’t have invited them in the first place. I know I wouldn’t invite anyone I couldn’t trust.
This is why I wonder how well the OP knows his hosts. Perhaps he needed a place to stay and was set up by a shul, or a mutual friend, and in reality has never met these people. In that case I would understand. But if he knows them personally I still maintain that it’s weird.
Josh31, Cindy is not homeschooling her kids. She is a stay-at-home mom, but she doesn’t homeschool. Maybe you were confused by this passage:
“Cindy, of course, and her troubles, are hypothetical. Our country still extends a generous safety net to its neediest citizens, and the mortgage interest deduction is alive and well. Children are not forced into any educational program and can even be home-schooled.”
This was referring to the “junior civil service program” forced upon Cindy’s kids, which is clearly extracurricular. There was no indication that she homeschooled them.
I agree with the OP. Obviously it’s their house, they have that right, blah blah blah, but it’s clear he was only trying to find his room and if it had been open he would have glanced in, noticed it was the wrong room, and kept looking. And I just think it’s a little bizarre. Like, what are they hiding? Why are they so suspicious?
SG, how well do you know these people? If they’re only acquaintances, that’s one thing. It’s more strange if you are close with them.
Reform vs. Conservative? Really? Obviously they disagree, but I haven’t heard of them attacking each other.
Look up! Nobody looks up anymore.
Nope, YOUR fault for being so juvenile that you have to involve yourself in a discussion simply to spite the OP who asked politely for same-gender advice.
Yes, most gas stations will have hechshered chips, nuts, and candy. Some will even have kosher yogurt or fresh fruit if you want something healthier.
I have passed through Pennsylvania many times on road trips and I heartily recommend the local Sheetz chain of gas stations. They are always well stocked with many choices.
I agree that a person can have multiple “bashert”s. In fact, I dated other men who probably would have been right for me had we each been in a different stage of life. It just didn’t work out at that point in time. B”h I am very happy with how things turned out 🙂
I am not saying that there is only one “right” person. However, before you call someone picky for waiting around, remember that there are many, many “wrong”s.
There is a children’s book out there about a little boy whose father gives him a dollar. His friend offers to give him two quarters for the dollar, and he is so excited that now he has TWO pieces of money. In the same manner, he exchanges the two quarters for three dimes, then for four nickels, and finally for five pennies.
That book made me so sad as a child.
It’s great with Mexican food 🙂
Not if you don’t have a TV or DVD player (we have a TV now because it came with our furnished apt, but definitely will not have one when we move, and we don’t have a DVD player anyway).
Hebrew teacher at a day school
“First, if you check the CIA’s web site, you’ll see that the 1967 was not a ‘neis’. They knew the Israelis could operate on multiple fronts and still win. “
Of course 1967 was a neis, just as waking up in the morning is a neis, sunshine is a neis, childbirth is a neis, etc.
Um, how about the recent court decision that will crack down on supermarkets that want to stay open on shabbos? Anybody hear about that?
Totally agree with oomis. And by the way I think it’s super ironic– and super disrespectful– that a girl who wants to stop talking to boys gets flooded with responses to this thread FROM BOYS. Think about it.
Like, literally in a circle.
To clarify: this is not based on allegations made by the former employee. I certainly can’t comment on whether the race/sex discrimination case was legitimate or not. But during the process of the lawsuit, Deen took a deposition on record and was quoted as saying those things about her brother’s wedding. Officially on record and verifiable.
Yes, try to get on to the teen tournament if you can! I was so upset that I missed out on both the teen and college tournaments and now have to compete with 60 year olds who have had more education and life experience…oh well 🙁
I used to watch the show “religiously” (I don’t mean this literally, so please don’t take offense) and I saw many contestants of different body types, etc. competing. They definitely pick contestants based on personality and if you don’t come across as “likable” they won’t pick you even if you’re a genius, but I don’t think looks are taken into account.
Hatzlacha! Let us know if you get on 🙂
Correction: my husband says that because you did not use shem hashem (I assume) it was not even a shevua and therefore there is no transgression.
Correct, this does not qualify as a neder. One should say “bli shevua” rather than “bli neder”.
What you did was commit to something, which is a shevua. A neder would be if you were to prohibit yourself from something.
This was one of the first things my husband taught me when we met and I happened to use the phrase “bli neder”. It seems to be a little known fact in the frum community.
“Leave Mr. Snowden alone. I hope he alludes the American Government for ever.”
Yes, I too hope that Snowden continues to make reference to the American government.
haifagirl, where are you?
Well, you didn’t provide a source, so I googled and that blog came up. Unless you are the administrator of that blog, in which case I apologize….
Others gave sources for their recipes. I personally only post recipes that I have created. If I were to suggest a recipe from elsewhere I would give the source.
It is possible that the “convention” with recipes in some circles is not to give sources, but I always do and notice that most others do as well. Someone worked hard to create that recipe; let’s give them credit for it.
Yep. It’s true. I know two other people in the CR. One also knows who I am. I am not sure if the other one has made the connection yet, or if he would even remember me (I was at his shabbos table once about a year ago, but he is also friends with the first person so my name may have come up through him).
writersoul, where did you get this info? Jeopardy! is actually very accommodating of frum people– there was an online test over Sukkos a few years ago and they were flooded with complaints. They ultimately let us take the test on an alternate date. I have been taking the test for years and so far have not received “the call”.
A quick google search turns up someone’s blog. He says that he attended a taping of the show of July 18, 2007, which happens to have been a Wednesday.
shikron, yes, it is possible to study for the show. There are certain categories that are more common and one can reasonably expect to encounter them– for instance, gourmet food, ballet, opera, U.S. presidents, state capitals, and “potent potables” (alcoholic drinks).
I think it’s actually very valuable to know the information that shows up on Jeopardy! It’s always broadening to educate yourself on a variety of subjects. I was really excited when my college made it into a Jeopardy! clue recently.
I am not familiar with the public school administration of 25 years ago, or of today, for that matter. I can tell you that I would personally object to a kid using that word in public school just to horse around, or for the sake of saying it, as many kids do. However, were a kid to use that word in biology class, he would be justified, and if I were a teacher, I would actively encourage my kids to use it rather than a euphemism.
Within its proper context, there is nothing improper about it and no reason to be ashamed of using it. It is not graphic in any way and doesn’t conjure any images that wouldn’t also be conjured by a different term. If you are going to sit down and learn about it, you had better not be ashamed to describe what you are learning using real terminology, not couch it in kiddie terms that beat around the bush for no apparent reason.
I am sorry but I just listened to Rav Linzer’s daf yomi shiur and I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Incidentally, I have never been a fan of hers. Her cooking is extra fatty for no apparent reason, and her persona comes off as a caricature.